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Flying Monkeys????
Before we got married, we had dinner with Heather’s parents. She told me that her Mom is opinionated and mean. I assured her I could stand up to her. I didn’t and Heather wanted to know why. I said “It got to the point where I was more afraid of the flying monkeys looming outside the restaurant.”
Actually, my Mother-in-law is a wonderful person and I love her. I say that because she reads this…
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A Whale Shake?? Are You Kidding Me???
How to make a whale float: Mix root beer, vanilla ice cream and a whale.
A young Pacific gray whale was delighting visitors to the Redondo Beach pier a couple of years ago, frolicking and splashing in the water close to the shoreline.
I wish I was that way. I could entertain lots of people just by frolicking in the water, although I don’t think what I do would be called frolicking. More like…
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I'm Upside Down!!!
I’m Upside Down!!!
I sent a package last Christmas season. The clerk said it will be $42.50 for the fastest delivery and $31.56 for the slower delivery. I sarcastically said, ” As long as it gets there in my lifetime.” He said, “That’ll be $42.50.”
Its very hard to understand the rules for postal rates. The clerks seem to be nicer these days – and funny. A friend of mine went to the post office to mail a very…
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I Can't Give To Charities!!!
I Can’t Give To Charities!!!
I saw an interview with a MLB played. The reporter said “You make a lot of money but have yet to give to a charity”! “Do you know my Mom is very sick? My brother can’t find a job? My sister’s husband left her penniless? I dont give them money so why would I give any to a charity?”
I’ve heard it said again and again that money is the root of all evil. That is simply not true. These well…
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The Ten Million Dollar Woman!!!
Lady Gaga is getting paid ten million dollars to perform at the Super Bowl. Inflation I guess. You used to get Lindsay Wagner or Lee Majors for only six million.
Making that kind of scratch, I wonder if she would ever consider buying bionics. Can you imaging what her shows would be like? She’s already a high energy act so I don’t know what might happen.
The NFL really messed up this year…
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Happy Puppy Day!!!
In honor of National Puppy Day, I will lay around, howl at the most feint sound, eat part of the couch, chase cars and lay in wait to bite the mailman. Oh, and have dinner at grandma’s. Now that’s some dog food.
Who doesn’t love puppies? They’re just so cute! Even though they sleep an awful lot, it’s a good thing because otherwise we would fall over from sheer exhaustion! But luckily, they run…
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Oh No You Didn't!!!
Oh No You Didn’t!!!
I can’t stand perpetual liars. Seriously, I just can’t be friends with people who say things that are not true, just to get attention. Oh, and yesterday I had dinner with the Pope.
Don’t you just hate it when you meet someone who seems like they would be a great friend but was simply feeding you a pack of lies? It’s a horrible experience considering how difficult it is to find good friends.
I…
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Not Today...
Not Today…
I have few words today. No joke. Only prayers for the people of Orlando. Please join me. Horrific.
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