Watching Jesus Camp on Hulu and recognizing myself in all these kids and recognizing the teachings the adults are giving them as things that I used to be told and do in Good News Club. I had actually managed to forget a lot of GNC stuff.
It shocks me that these people exist and that I could have easily been one of them. I see myself in Rachel, the girl who went up to a lady in the bowling alley and said God wanted her. I see myself in Levi, the boy with the long rattail/mullet who preaches.
I can remember crying and begging to be saved while sitting in a school desk with a man across from me holding my hands and telling me that I was already saved because I was sitting there after school on a Tuesday instead of just going home and playing video games. I can remember going home and telling my parents what I had learned after every meeting.
I hated it.
I'm so fucking grateful and glad that I got out of there. I'm so fucking glad that I was able to stop going after a certain grade and that I could explore my own beliefs instead of others. I'm not a Christian whatsoever and the song Lean On Me still makes me want to crawl out of my skin because they played it at the end of every meeting.
