#jewness

[tunnelsystem]

can anon stop comparing actual violent lgbtphobic people to a nb lesbian lol

right fbvhjgfkefrgth

[aviale-remade]

you better take good care of my baby

Oh I will, he likes his new home.

[nobutsaurusly]

like the true jew I am, I'm looking forward to having chinese food with my grandparents tonight. 

[petalsandbridges]

Okay I have race questionings of myself.

Discussion of mixed-ness questionings, discussion of what whiteness is and questioning if it is me under the cut. Some internalized beauty standards stuff. Basically sensitive shit, and I could see it being triggering. It's is 100% okay to not engage with this post. But I do want to open it up, for myself. There's no one question in here. It's info about me and room to comment.

So, as it says in my bio, I'm jewish. My whole family is from another place, a place that at the time they left was still filled mostly with white christians. They were there for generations. I don't know much about what happened before my great-grandmother.

I'm at a loss, though. Without knowing it, I spent a lot of my closeted young trans girl disassociated mirror time also wondering why my skin was "olive" unlike people on TV, why I had my facial features and hair. I didn't know anyone who looked like me and simultaneously, I was dysphoric. This mix of things never lead me to think about race consciously. I just knew I looked weird, I didn't look like the people on TV. It added to my feeling, along with the dysphoria, of alienation. In the past I've had someone say I looked Egyptian, but I never thought about it much. But more recently, a WOC said I don't look white. Then I really started to think about it and remembered these mirror experiences.

I could have been mixed with people of color at some point a couple generations back. Or, I don't know what. But I just am not sure I will ever know what the deal is (because people in my family could have denied such mixed-ness,) and I want to know if this means I'm not white. I used to believe I straight-up had white privilege, but more recently I stopped feeling like it was honest to say "I'm white" when I'm questioning it like this. If it's about complexion and facial features, mine don't fit white beauty standards and they don't look like those of white christians as far as I can tell. If it's about identification then I don't know what the answer is.

I don't really have a question, but does anyone have a desire to comment? If so, please feel free.

[my-hardoutershell]

Facebook...

keeps showing me adds for Jdate, with " meet a nice jewish boy now". Facebook stop, you're worse than my grandmother. (actually my grandmother doesn't even do this so stop face book, i know i'm single thank you.)

[buddygolly-blog]

dappled-light replied to your photoset: Cut deez nuts bangs last night. Every fashion...

you’re beginning to look like the female version of eli kleinsmith. also, DAT NOSE RING

ELIZABETH, unacceptable.

[ariannamr-blog]

I want a nice jewish boy.