Pairing: vamp!Jinki x Reader
Genre: Vampire AU, Fluff
Rating: PG
Summary: Jinki has a surprise for his favorite human.
Word Count: 0.9k
Warnings: None, really. Blood drinking mentioned but not done.
A/N: Happy birthday to one of the cutest leaders I know <3
No matter how many times Jinki ran his hands over his cream slacks, he couldn't get rid of the sweaty palms sensation. Sure, his body hadn't produced sweat in centuries but that fact did little to the feeling go away.
Today was the day.
All the paperwork was done. Any registration fees were paid. He just needed to ask you. Make it official on paper.
A quick glance at his watch reminded him that you should be getting off the bus soon. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.. Everything would be alright. Even if you rejected his request, it wouldn't be the end of the world.
You knocked on the door lightly. It'd be difficult, if not impossible, for other people to hear it, but you knew he could be deep in his basement and still pick up the sound. He opened the door and smiled. "____, welcome."
You smiled sweetly and stepped inside. "The storm's starting to kick up. I brought my overnight bag, just in case." You held up the leopard print backpack. "Hope that's okay."
He nodded and closed the door. "Of course it is. I prefer it over traveling so late."
You laughed. "Somehow I knew you'd say that." You stepped close and poked his cheek, eyeing the reaction of his skin. "Hm, you're a little dryer than usual." You stepped back and peeled off your scarf and coat. "Have you been overdoing it again?"
He avoided your perceptive gaze. "It couldn't be helped. I needed to pickup documents and return them as quickly as possible."
You sighed and turned on your heel. "Then we should go ahead and get started." You beckoned him to follow with a few curls of your finger. Like a lovesick puppy, his feet obeyed. It wasn't until you pulled your shirt collar away from your throat that he even noticed you were seated, waiting for him to drink his fill.
"Oh, no." He shook his head to clear away the fog. "I wanted to talk with you first."
"Oh?" You blinked then let go of your shirt. "What about? Is it my work schedule? I can request to get off earlier, but I'm not sure my boss will allow it."
"Well, yes but not exactly." He went to his desk and plled out the contract he picked up from H&V Resources. "You made a comment last month about how it'd be easier to be a live-in donor--"
You glanced at him then at the papers in his hand before jumping to your feet. "Is that--" Fear and sorrow flowed from your pores like a thick, bitter syrup completely unlike your usual light floral scent. "Oh. I-I didn't mean to upset or offend you. It's just been a mess at work and being with--I'm mean, around you--Oh, God. Please don't fire me--"
He shushed you with a cold fingertip against your trembling lips. "I wouldn't dream of it." When he was certain you'd calmed down, he held up the papers. "It took me a while to get permission and the permits, but I'd like to ask you to be my personal live-in donor."
Your jaw dropped.
"As you said then, it'd be much easier if you lived here with me." He gestured to your surroundings. "I have plenty of space. I'm offering a six-figure salary as well as health and life insurance." He passed the papers to you.
"Mr. Lee, that's a lot of money."
"I realize that. That's why I hoped to have you take on the role as my personal assistant with my company as well. You could help me avoid 'overdoing it,' as you say. It'd benefit you as I wouldn't need to feed as often." When that thoughtful look settled on your face as you flipped through the pages, the sweaty palms came back. He shoved his hands into his pockets. "Feel free to take your time to look over--"
"Where's a pen?" You searched the top of his desk and found one. Before he thought to stop you, you were going through and signing and initialing wherever highlighted.
"I-I thought you'd want to take your time to read it thoroughly." It was a lot to process given all the disastrous ways he imagined things turning out.
"It's a no-brainer. I hate my other job and we get along great. On top of that, you're essentially offering a way to turn my life around. Even one year working for you would pay off my debts." Your words were rushed and your hand shook as you blitzed through the contract. "Imagine me being able to lease a car!"
Your happiness was contagious, treating him to a richer flavor of your scent he'd never experienced. "I'd be happy to help you get a car. I could also loan you one of mine as a company car."
You paused and looked at him with a mixture of shock and glee. "I've never had a job with a company car before." Doubt flittered through your mind. "Are you sure you want me for this?" Worry filled your eyes and it melted his heart.
"____, dear. May I be brutally honest with you?" When you nodded he took one of your hands in his. "You are one of the most brilliant, endearing, and compassionate people I've ever met. There's no one else I trust, or want, to give this position to."
"Thank you so much." You blushed then returned to the contract. You scribbled your name on the final page and handed the stack to him. "It'll be a pleasure living with you."
He chuckled and accepted the contract. "I'm almost positive the pleasure will be all mine."
Prompt A81— “You said you would come back soon! It’s been all night!”
Warnings: Angst, slight fluff, mention of a pet passing.
W/C: 1.1K
The cool air of the night nipped at your exposed skin as you made your way towards the apartment building you lived in with Jinki, you had left, you weren’t sure when you had left the building after you received a call, you left with only the words ‘I’ll come back soon' before disappearing into the elevator and out the building to take a walk and clear your head, your eyes were red from crying and your nose felt stuffy, the door to the building opens and Jinki moves towards you, you could see his tense muscles and the worry in his eyes.
“Y/n, oh, thank gods.” He says as he engulfs you into a warm hug. “I was so worried about you, where did you go?” He releases you from the hug and moves his hands up to your face to cup your cheeks, you hadn’t moved at all since he had engulfed you in a hug, he inspects your face and quickly picks up on your red eyes and tear-stained cheeks. “You said you would come back soon! It’s been all night!” You could hear the concern in his tone. “Come on, let’s get inside, and you can tell me what’s going on.” He releases your cheeks and wraps an arm around you, guiding you into the building and to the elevator.
“I’m sorry.” You whisper, your voice hoarse after crying and sniffing, Jinki pulls you close against him. “I’m sorry I made you worry.” You could feel your eyes swelling up with tears.
“Don’t apologize.” He gently says. “Something clearly upset you.” You bring one of your hands to your face and use the sleeve of the hoodie you wore to wipe away the tears threatening to spill. “You can tell me when you’re ready, but please don’t disappear like that for almost the entire night again.” You sniff as you slowly nod your head, he gently rubs your upper arm. “I’m just happy you returned safely.” The elevator slowly comes to a halt before the doors open, he leads you out of the elevator and to the apartment you shared with him, he guides you inside and towards the couch. “I’m going to go boil the water, do you want a cup of tea?”
“Yes, please.” You whisper, he nods his head and moves towards the kitchen area which wasn’t far from the living area, while preparing the tea he continuously glanced in your direction, making sure that you were still on the couch, once he finished making the tea he made his way back to the couch carrying two cups of tea, he placed them down on the coffee table before settling down next to you, he reaches for your hand that was on your knee.
“Y/n…” He softly whispers, your lips part as you let out a sigh, your eyes not moving from the spot on the floor you were staring at. “Do you want to talk about it or tell me?”
“Do you…” You pause as you felt your heart clenching with pain. “Do you remember when I told you about… my horse I’ve had since I was a teenager?” He gently squeezes your hand, urging you to continue. “The call I received last night…” Jinki reaches with his other hand to wipe away the stray tear rolling down your cheek. “It was from my parents…” He nods his head, knowing what you were about to say. “They had to put her down.”
“Y/n… sweetheart.” He pulls you into him, your arms move to wrap around his shoulders as you begin to cry into his shoulder, he slowly rubs his hand up and down your back in a comforting manner, he held you as you sobbed into his shoulder, he knew how much you loved your horse and to hear the news about her sudden passing must have been a hard hit, even he felt a pinch in his chest, he held you like that while rubbing your back as you sobbed into his shoulder, not saying anything, because nothing he would say now would make you feel better, he knew that, he leans back on the couch, pulling you with him to almost lay on top of him as he comforts you, hours passed, and you had slowly calmed down before falling asleep on him, he had fallen asleep not long after you had and just as the sun was starting to rise.
The tea he had made was untouched and cold as the morning slowly passed with the two of you still on the couch asleep, it wasn’t until it was almost ten that he had woken up and carefully moved you off him and laid you down on the couch, you slightly stir in your sleep, he softly smiles before picking up the untouched tea and moving the cups to the kitchen, he reaches for his phone that was on the kitchen counter and sent a message to Minho, explaining to him what had happened and that he wouldn’t be able to make in for practice today.
“Jinki…?” You whisper as you lift your head to look around.
“I’m here.” He says as he places his phone down on the counter. “I’m going to make us a new cup of tea, but first I think you should shower.” You nod your head while he approached you. “Come on, I’ll go prepare the water, do you want to shower alone?” You sit upright and slowly stood from the couch.
“Can you please shower with me?” You ask as you made your way to the bedroom, with him behind you. “I don’t want to do it alone.”
“Of course, sweetheart.” He says, you enter the bedroom and begin removing your clothes while he went to the bathroom to open the water and let it warm up, you soon joined him in the bathroom just as he finished adjusting the water temperature, he quickly discards his clothes before taking your hand and leading you into the shower, the warm water hits your skin before you felt his arms wrap around you from behind, you stood like that underneath the water, letting the water droplets fall down on you and trickle down your skin before falling onto the tiled shower floor, you weren’t sure how long you stood there with him like that, but you remember feeling the water becoming cold before he dried you and helped you get dressed into comfortable clothes and helped you into the bed and tucked you in. “I’m going to get some water for you before you fall asleep.” You barely heard him before he disappeared from the room to get the glass, after he made sure that you drank at least some of the water he joined you underneath the covers and pulled you against him, letting you get comfortable before you drifted back to sleep with him rubbing your back.
jīlè // 雞肋 (chinese, n.) - things that you have no use for, yet still don’t want to throw away
Genre: fluff
Word Count: 300-400
Note: This drabble was requested by shinee loving anon using this list. please feel free to make a request using this list!
There is a coat on the rack that you never wear.
"It doesn't fit anymore," you tell Jinki when he asks about it. Your fingers trace its beige lining, and tiny dimples from around your wistful smile. "But it's rather pretty, isn't it?"
Jinki nods, noting the nostalgic twinkle in your eyes. He wants to know what memory the coat evokes, but he forgets to ask when you fill the place by his side, having fit your arms through a newer maroon jacket, and lace your fingers through his. All thoughts about the beige coat are carried away by the autumn breeze.
Jinki's curiosity returns weeks later when his morning clumsiness causes the coat to land in a bundle at his feet. Were he the kind of person who mourns wasted time, he might curse himself as he squats to scoop the fabric into his arms. Were it not for his eerily calm demeanor, he might groan as he squats again to reach for the small folded paper that falls out of the coat's pocket.
Although he instantly recognizes the handwriting on the paper as yours, Jinki makes no effort to read it. As curious as he is, he does not think that his curiosity overrides your right to privacy. He hangs the coat on the rack, and he is just about to return the paper to its place when your voice sounds from the doorway.
"Unfold it," you urge, smiling when Jinki looks back at you. "Unfold it and read it."
Grateful for the invitation, Jinki nods. Within your notes, he finds the ticket stub from a movie you saw on one of your first dates. The note boasts, "The best person I have ever known held my hand today, and I will never forget it. I hope he never lets me go."
So that's why you keep the jacket, Jinki realizes, returning your smile, It helps you remember.
Jinki can't decide what to say first: that you are the best person he has ever known or that he will never let you go. Eventually, tracing his fingers along its beige lining, he starts with, "It really is a rather pretty coat."
Note: This ties in with my other SHINee drabbles, most notably Anniversary (Minho). So maybe check that out after you read this :)
You had fallen out of the habit of dating, electing to instead focus on advancing your career. Once you earned that long-awaited promotion— just another thing marked off your list of goals— you wondered what harm could be in just one date.
So you casually asked your most trusted friends if they knew anybody worth meeting. And almost immediately, over a cup of coffee in a local cafe, your friend gushed, “I know the perfect person.” Then, perhaps sensing your anxiety, she hummed comfortingly, “Don’t worry— it’s one of Minho’s friends!”
“Oh no!” You groaned somewhat jokingly at the mention of her boyfriend, who you had known for far too long. “Now I’m really worried!”
She swatted at you playfully, unable to restrain her giggle. “Yeah, I admit Minho can be a piece of work sometimes.” When you eyed her challengingly, she admitted with a sigh, “Okay, he’s a handful most of the time. But Jinki isn’t like that. He’s really, really nice.”
“A double really?” You inquired. Your friend always called someone ‘really, really nice’ when she was concealing some kind of flaw.
“Yeah,” she said confidently. But as she scrolled through her phone for a picture of him, she admitted, “I mean, he’s a little accident prone. . .” She trailed off as she held her phone out to you.
Of all flaws, being clumsy wasn’t the worst. So as you accepted the phone, you defended the man you hadn’t even met yet. “He can’t be that bad.” And as you looked through the pictures, you acknowledged, “He’s cute—”
“And nice,” your friend reminded once more. You returned her phone, and she said, “Look, Y/N, nice people are hard to find. Anyway, I’ll tell Minho to give Jinki your number, alright?”
“Sure,” you consented with a shrug. “What’s the worst that could happen?”
You spent the next week texting Jinki at every opportunity. What started as a bored venture into dating somehow evolved into a heart fluttering adventure. It was as if you were holding your breath between every interaction, so when Jinki asked to take you on an official date, you may have reacted with an overly enthusiastic yes, contrary to the popular tactic of playing hard to get.
He met you at your apartment with a broad smile and offered his arm as he escorted you toward the setting sun. “I’ve heard so many things about this place,” he said when you asked where you were going.
“I’m sure it will be lovely,” you assured. But you hadn’t expected to be led to a five star restaurant.
And when you glanced at Jinki’s wide eyed, slack jawed expression, you reasoned that he must have been surprised too. He only reluctantly approached the hostess’ podium when you nudged him forward, and you could have sworn that when asked for a name, Jinki whispered, “Choi Minho.”
But you were too overwhelmed to question what you heard. You and Jinki both, although well dressed, clearly did not meet the standard of this restaurant. You knew it— but so did everyone else, staff and fellow patrons alike, judging by their unbroken stares as you followed the hostess to the table.
Thankfully, this didn’t distract Jinki from acting like a perfect gentleman. So as you slipped into a conversation, you easily forgot about the critical stares of strangers. Until the first incident, that is.
Apparently the waister tipped over Jinki’s foot, and he unceremoniously toppled over, spilling drinks all over the table and your white blouse. The ensuing chaos turned heads, of course, but you only cared about Jinki’s thousand apologies.
“Hey— It’s okay.” You laughed as you assessed the damage to your shirt; thankfully, you had worn an undershirt. “It’s just water.”
But that didn’t prevent him from racing over to your side of the table to offer his jacket to conceal your stained shirt. On his way, he stepped clumsily over the waiter, who had crouched onto the floor to pick up the cups. The waiter glared at Jinki as if his life had been threatened, and you had to stifle your laughter.
“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” Jinki repeated as he draped the jacket around your shoulders.
“My apologies.” The waiter stood and spoke through gritted teeth. “Let me sit you at a different table.” And once you finished the walk of shame to a corner where, you’re sure the waiter hoped, you would attract less glares, he promised to return with new drinks.
You tried to interest Jinki in a new conversation, but the blush seemed to have permanently settled on his cheeks.
As you finished your meal, Jinki repeated, “I’m sorry I turned this into such a disaster.” And before you could argue that you were actually enjoying his company, he continued, “Let me just get the check—” and he raised his hand to call for the waiter.
But in the process, he hit the waiter in the face full force. The loud SMACK once again led stares to your table; the waiter appeared to be holding his breath and Jinki, now a brilliant crimson, couldn’t even will himself to look at the waiter.
And you knew you shouldn’t laugh. The cutting silence that overcame the entire restaurant made that evident, but you couldn’t help it. Suddenly, you were overcome by a laughter that seized your entire body. Before you could hide your face against the table cloth, you were sure you saw Jinki smile shyly at your reaction.
“Please,” the waiter begged as he pressed the bill on the table, “never come back, Mr. Choi.”
And the realization that Jinki had stolen Minho’s reservation made you laugh even harder, but you would be sure to apologize to your friend later.
Aren't you somethin' to admire?
'Cause your shine is somethin' like a mirror
And I can't help but notice
You reflect in this heart of mine
If you ever feel alone and
The glare makes me hard to find
Just know that I'm always
Parallel on the other side
– Mirrors (Justin Timberlake)
***
Monday is always kind of a mess at the office, especially when you’re in the middle of catching some projects to be done before Christmas day off which already around the corner I swear I could smell my mother’s baked mac and cheese under my nose. To make it worse, Kibum is nowhere around to be found, making me gone insane and guilty charged choosing my new tantrum’s target, and this round’s the lucky Choi.
“You and your desk spent hours with him! How the hell you don't know where that file is?”
In fact, I don't really need Kibum. It’s the new design layout for our new flagship store.
“He keeps his stuff away from people! And for your information, I’m in charge of graphic, I’m not baby-sitting VM staffs, and Kibum’s known as a douche which I told you to fire him as soon as possible long time ago but you shake it off right on my face! Ha!”
Minho’s cow eyes locked to the screen in front of him but his voice breaks my ears terribly. I snatch the phone in front of me and tapped my shoes impatiently on the tiles while waiting the pho––
“Lee Taemin! Once you’ve done with that window display sketch, go hunt Kibum in every corner of the workshop and don’t you dare showing your nose in front of me if you haven’t got him in your hand!”
Landed myself next to Minho, I can feel my neck stiffen and suddenly my head's heavy as rock.
“Calm down. You scared the intern.”
On my left, some interns duck their head as low as could be. I feel sorry toward them. And further more toward the company for giving a bad impression of a project manager to them.
“As much as I love Kibum for his fashion taste and quick wits, I hate him every time he started his hide and seek game! Not to mention this time of the year!”
“We can handle this! I'll help you after I finished checking this.”
“I swear to every pair of shoes I had, if Kibum didn't show up until 5, I’ll personally burn his jacket collection down! And I will––“
“_______. Can I talk to you for a second?”
Jonghyun shoved his head out from his door, special treat for the general manager.
“What?!”
“Inside. Please.”
He flashed a wide grin and it definitely swooned the intern girl number two who can’t handle her dropped jaw. Minho muttered ‘just go’ and I heaved a breath out before leave him with his beloved CorelDraw.
“Sit down,” his eyes are not leaving the paper in his hand until I perfectly flopped on the chair.
“Anything important?”
“You could said so.”
“What's it?”
“You're planning some murder case, panicking around and it's not good for my other employees.”
“I’m panicking for their own good! If I didn’t chase this bastard down, we couldn't make it to open the store at 20! And they’ll probably got no income next following month"
“Yelling around since the morning isn’t necessary, though.”
“I wouldn’t make a fuss if everything’s under schedule, Jjong! For Christ’s sake, it’s already 7th!”
“Take a deep breath.”
It’s hard to stay calm when your clock’s ticking and you still wait for the layout design for your about to lunch shop in less than two weeks. Ugh, my life sucks.
“This is pathetic.”
“Yeah, you’re.”
“What?! I worked my ass hard and you just sit here telling me o––“
My phone's ringing frantically, saving Jonghyun from cussing shower.
“I found him!”
“Where’s he?”
“Catching up with some guys in the coffee shop across the office.”
“What?!”
“I’ll give it to him! Yoooo! Kibum! _______ want to speak!”
There's a long pause and Jonghyun’s gaze annoys me so much I want to throw up.
“Key's speaking!”
“KIM KIBUM!!!”
“Hold that thought. Before you hulking me, I’m doing some works here. And I hope you’re smart enough not to disturb me.”
“Working?! By enjoying your coffee while your project manager freaking out over here?!”
“By talking to the guy’s who’ll help us to install the bikes! Chillax, dude! I can't believe Taemin successfully scamming me again! Lucky for us, their studio able to take over the chalk mural that the earlier vendor reject!”
“How about the design layout?!”
“I’ve sent it 5 minutes ago when Taemin told me to.”
“Is it finished already?”
“Perfectly! Now allow me to finish my job before you could take over it next week! Smooch ya later!”
Kibum’s cut the conversation before I managed to curse him further more. Something unclenched inside my chest but other’s lump jabbed my throat right away when I see no expression change in Jonghyun’s face.
“You know about this, don’t you?”
Jonghyun chuckles before turned his chin my direction and casually scribble something, “Of course. He always put me on CC.”
Kim Jonghyun being happy and jubilee and gleeful and every single nice things is scarier than his ogre mode. Look at his winning smirk gave cringe all over my skin. Slyly I pulled back my chair before anything escalated into intense conversation.
“Don't you dare to leave.”
“Your desk can wait. Mom cannot.”
Instead of giving me some privileges, having my brother as my boss is a lot like pain in the ass. No matter how many times I told him not to bring any family matters to works, he would always break that.
“Oh, come on! We're at the office now!”
“That's why! You need to obey me. Sit down.”
I drag my feet back to the vacant seat lazily. He must planning something behind my back because he needed to clear his throat before leaned front and rest his chin on his folded hands propped on his desk.
“You got some papers to finish, so as you wish, I’ll make it quick.”
“Just spill the beans, your prolog always as bad as your movie choices.”
“Okay. Listen to this and listen carefully,” I rolled my eyes seeing him acting serious while in fact he’s a big jokester at home, “Tell me, exactly, how long it is Jinki has been working here?”
“Ugh, I’m not doing this shit.”
“How long?”
“Two years, seven months, three days, and I suppose, what… three hours? Where exactly is it going?”
“And how long have you been in love with Jinki, our head of design department?”
Chewed my cheek from the inside, I gain some guts before answering, “Two years, seven months, and two days.”
I was on a business trip to London that time and unable to be there on Jinki’s first day at the office. The next following morning, I found the desk across mine already occupied by someone who apparently quirky enough to put some chicken figurines and three types of rubic cubes around his desk book. When the owner stepped outside Jonghyun’s room and back to his place, my heart sunken down the floor and I found myself fell hard by a smile almost as bright as the sun.
The time he stretched his hand out and introduced himself – BOOM – my heart stolen hard right away for the rest of my existence in this office.
“I thought as much.”
“Crap. Do you think everybody knows?”
“Minho and Kibum basically are everybody, so yes.”
“Do you think Jinki knows?
“Of course Jinki knows! It’s about time! You need to make some moves instead being statue anytime he’s around.”
“I’m not! I talked to him!”
“I mean some other thing besides ‘Hi, Jinki!’, ‘Good morning, Jinki!, ‘Have you had your lunch?’, and ‘How’s the traffic?’. Oh my dear Lords, the last one frustrating me so much, he lives two blocks away from here and he walks every single days for God’s sake!”
Jonghyun might be an asshole, but he’s been a good brother for me more than two decades.
“Then what I supposed to do?”
“I don’t know, maybe invite him out for a drink and then, after about thirty minutes or you think so, casually drop into deeper conversation about your fantasy of him and you being married, having a lots of sex and babies and growing old together!”
Once an asshole, forever an asshole. Warm fuzzy feeling crept up my face until the point blood on my temple boiled up, almost burst out my eyes.
“I am so done with you! Forget it that we are actually blood related!”
Jonghyun cracks on his seat, a little bit too loud, some people outside turned their head to the boss sanctuary. Confirming who my crush is to Jonghyun isn’t the best decision I ever made in my life. Half kicking the chair, I stormed out the room with teeth clenched inside my mouth.
“Mom would be very happy if one of use brings date to the Christmas supper!!”
Minho tilted his head, entail my steps to my desk, and spare his want-to-know look to me and Jonghyun one to the other.
***
Disaster is the interior design consultant you chose to carry on the task finishing the window display for the on-going project decided to delay their action because they failed to built the mock up and need more times to completeTaemin’s design.
Jinki’s busy calling everyone he knows for any replacement while Taemin keeps texting from the fit out site. Minho used his power on the intern to send one of them as Taemin’s assistant and the other two to help him making the emergency back wall just in case Kibum and his team needs to change the étalage immediately.
“Which part of our meeting that your company failed to understand?! I need them built at this Friday! How can you come up with such a news at this very Tuesday?!!”
I don’t care anymore about my image. Jonghyun inclined his head inside the glass wall room to check what kind of chaos happened outside.
“I can’t give you any additional day! My graphic team needs the area clear to complete their image installment on Sunday!”
Kibum ran to my side and shoved me a paper with ‘overnight work?’ on it which I reply merely with shaking my head hard, “Find a way out! Used two workshops at a time or anything! I'll call you in an hour and I expect something good!”
The phone in my hand flees right away after I pressed the red button down.
“Give me your merchandising schedule!”
Kibum walks behind me to fit himself on my chair and clicking here and everywhere until a colorful time table appeared on my screen.
“We can still push my kids to start working on Sunday.”
“You mean overlapping Minho’s team?”
“Yeah. That's the only possible way since you object my advice.”
“The company promised not to force them to work overnight on winter! Jonghyun won’t pay extra for it! Besides, that mall came up with apartment complex inside. We couldn’t get any permission from the landlord.”
Kibum made another clicks somewhere and two sheets of paper freshly came out from the printer.
“Let’s go to Minho. Hopefully intern number two still interested to him and voluntary offer herself!”
“I almost forgot how smart you are!”
Kibum and I didn’t wait another second making our way to Minho’s desk.
The Holy Spirit actually do exist and conspiring against me and Kibum because while I slay the contractor earlier, Jonghyun sneaked out his glass box and had a casual chit chat with Minho as if he didn’t aware that half of the office almost burnt in anger.
“Is something bad happened?”
The question folded out as soon as Jonghyun catch us flailing in desperation toward Minho. I glance to my right side to found Kibum's face was horrorized, “Uh, nope.”
“Really?”
Jonghyun makes sure while cocking his head and knitting his brows together after he saw my eye contact with Minho signaling the paper on Kibum’s hand which failed in instant because Minho’s too busy with his favorite software.
“Yeah, it’s cool. Just–– want to visit Minho’s desk. Gossiping, you know.”
“Me?” The innocent camel eyes owner raised his head but still left clueless.
“Then why are you both panting so hard and Kibum suddenly out of pulse?”
Taemin was right when he told me Kibum's no use when he got panic attack.
“Well, you know.. It's because––”
“––because we had a little announcement to make.”
A deep soothing voice came behind my head getting closer as I heard a light steps and I found Jinki on my left with both hands inside his pants pocket, beaming in a radiant smile, making my heart skip a bit.
“Announcement? What? Finally you find someone attractive in this building?”
Remind me to kick Jonghyun’s head later.
“I did way before long. Let’s back to the business, the earlier worker can’t fill up their job excellently. So due to our tight schedule, we moved our window display to another workshop. Is that okay?”
“As long as we could make it before Christmas.”
“Of course! So now, Kibum can back to his station and _______, you can go to your desk and call Taemin to catch some update, shall we?”
He finishes his statement with a super cute wink that almost beats my three years old nephew’s.
“Uh, oh, right–– Right,” I exchange a perplexed look with Kibum and he only got shrugs on his shoulder to supply, “Kibum could break down everything with Minho. If you got something unclear, just call me.”
“Great. Well, Jinki, can I talk to you inside?”
“Roger that!” Jinki entails Jonghyun right away after he tapped my shoulder to ease my stress.
“What was thaaat?!” I shrieked to Kibum when I saw Jonghyun and Jinki secured inside the glass box.
“I don’t know! Your head designer keeps surprising me! I don’t mind anyway!" Kibum sings song before he rolled his eyes and back to his board.
“What’s going on?!” Minho has no idea at all and he keeps gazing on me and Kibum.
“Ask Kibum for the detail. Or I’ll email you after I got Taemin.”
Right, I need Taemin now to explain every tiny detail to me and how on earth Jinki saves the day by playing secret super hero.
It was pretty hectic which my mind hasn’t settled yet, so my heart jumped a little when I reached my desk and found my favorite canned coffee with a lime green post it pasted on.
Hello, I'm Jinki, your personal healthcare companion :) Don't stressed too much, I got your back! Enjoy!
Seriously?! Imitating Baymax just because I’m obsessed with that fluffy big white robot?
I spread my eyes inside the glass box and found Jonghyun and him in the midst of friendly talks. Waited a bit longer, finally Jinki struck on me. He only gave me a quick eye smile before catching back to my brother.
Hand is already on my phone, I decided to call Taemin later.
“What's up?”
Kibum’s chirpy voice welcomes me in one go.
“That head designer really keeps surprising.”
***
The empty office is the perfect playground for mischievous adults like us. As usual, after the opening of a new store, when Jonghyun is already snuggled under his blanket or still wandering around the city to treat the brand principal who came from abroad, Jinki, Kibum, Minho, and I held a little party to celebrate our sweat and blood of hard work.
Since it’s December, we change the beer and french fries with some hot chocolate, cheese popcorn, and instant s'mores that Minho treasured from supermarket near his house.
“Last project for this year and it finished one day earlier! I’m so proud of myself!” Kibum stretched his hands up in the air mimicking a bed commercial.
“Would be better if you’re not panicking about that event zone layout hid under your keyboard,” Minho finished his words with gulping the hot chocolate from his favorite Manchester United mug.
“It’s closed call and I just couldn’t handle it if Jinki and _______ grown their horns!”
“Why me suddenly?!” I heard Jinki chuckled on my triggered anger. I shot him a glare and he’s just being his usual, beaming and flaunting his white teeth. Again, successfully making me flustered on my own.
“I’m bored. Pick some movies or I’d make a call to the chicken house across our office.”
“Movies are lame. Let’s play some interesting game.”
“And that’s what we called lame. What are you?! Five? I’m with Jinki this time!”
“YOU’RE ALWAYS WITH JINKI!”
‘Minho and Kibum basically are everybody, so yes.’
Kibum and I know each other since college time in London, but it doesn’t corroborate that he knows me so well, until the point who is my crush right at the moment.
“You got my vote,” Minho casually let us know he agreed with Kibum which the latter replied with squealing on his seat making fist into the air, “Besides, being in the same room with Kibum, you, and movie at the same time is like digging my own grave. Both of you sobbing and finishing a box of tissue quicker than Jonghyun using them as first aid kit on his self-satisfaction method, ugh, no. Thank you very much.”
A cushion fled right away to Minho’s direction, “That’s my brother you’re talking about!”
“Like you even stand for him when he’s here!”
“Shut up! Don’t make me bring each of you a knife from the pantry. It’s two out of four. Lee Jinki. Are you in or not?!”
“Well, as long as it distracts me from stir fried honey chicken.”
“Great! Three against one. Game on, bitches! We’ll do the easiest one. Telepathy quiz! Choi Minho, you’re in my team!”
“Wait. You’re my partner!”
“Honey, no Jonghyun around and it means I don’t obligate to save your life.”
“Remind me to burn you alive.”
“Don’t worry, _______! I got your back!” Jinki slid closer to me and put a light tap on my shoulder.
My back? Seriously? Guessing one right is more than enough. How could a man smile so wide when he’s in fact, have no idea about the person he’s gonna get into team?
“We’re going to crush you down!”
Dude, better take care yourself first.
***
“The thing I hate the most!”
Kibum hand flails on his side while Minho’s brows knitted together into a thick bridge above his huge eyes.
“Sweat?”
“Down. Feet! Shoes!”
“Why don’t you tell me earlier?! UGG BOOTS!”
“Your turn!”
Kibum shoved the bowl we used to contain the colorful paper with words in it. Until now, they managed to guess four words.
“The place we met when we’re in London!”
“Trafalgar Square?!”
“Idiot!! At night! The big one!”
“Ahhh!! I know I know I know!! That’s easy! LONDON EYE!”
“Correct! Go go go!”
“Can you put something harder than this?” Minho scoff to Jinki and I then turned back to Kibum, “Orange vegetable you hate!”
“Seriously guys?! Carrot!!”
The bowl transferred to Kibum’s lap, “You can eat it three straight!”
“What?! Steak? Cinnamon rolls? Bagel?! Donut?!”
“Stop making me hungrier!” Jinki shrieked beside me, frown dangling on his face.
“The street food we got inside the taxi!”
“Hot dog? Rice cake? Corn dog?! CORN DOG!!!!”
Kibum looks like a kindergarten who just got a bunch of candies for lunch. Definitely turned hyperactive caused by too many sugar intake.
“It’s slimy. Lives near the water. Vibrant color!”
“What?!”
“Come on this is super easy!”
It must be the words Jinki put inside the bowl because he’s smirking right now, knowing that the couple wouldn’t able to guess it. Me myself still wonder what exactly the right answer is.
“Easy my ass?!”
“Aaarrgh!” the over-competitive monster right before me started losing himself, “Kind of lizard. People keep them as a pet!”
“I don’t keep weird animal as a dog! What?! Eel?!”
“Eel is for meals, dickhead! Come on! Slimy! Lizard! Vibrant co––“
“Time’s up!!” and Minho just slammed the table in front of him as if this is a final of an Olympic which he stepped as a country representative, “What’s exactly the answer, Jinx?”
Half whispered I ask the gleeful man right beside me who got happy after his opponent failed to guess his question, “Salamander!”
Thanks God Jonghyun and my Dad sometimes enjoying the Nat Geo in the television or else I would appear as dumb as Kibum. Who keep them as pet anyway?
“Our turn! Let’s kick their ass, _______!”
Dear Lord.
“I’d be happy enough if we can solve one.”
“Ready?!”
Minho takes a good grip on the phone we used as stopwatch. My head nods weakly, contras with optimistic atmosphere hovering Jinki’s face.
“Go!”
“The yellow plant your Mom loves the most.”
Eh?
“Yellow plant?”
“You guys have it in your front yard!”
“Sunflower?!”
“My smart lady!”
I don’t have enough time to blush because he already shoved the bowl in front of my belly.
“Ugh, the thing you hate?”
“Bad kids? Not enough sleep? No chicken on the table? What?”
No time to cover up my stalking ability, I just want to win this game so bad, “Spice you can’t have. You hate it!”
“Why not telling me earlier?! Cilantro!”
We might have a chance beat these insolent brats. Might.
“Your shoes if it’s not Monday!”
“Sneakers?”
“The brand!”
“Oh! Converse, right?!”
Another sparks burst out Jinki’s face, brighten up the gloomy air that piling up between Minho and Kibum.
“God, this is super easy! I never thought you guys would write this!”
“What did you write?!”
Kibum slapped Minho right in his bicep, startling the other one who replied with some arguments.
“If I’m a bunny and Kibum is a fox, then Jonghyun is a…?”
“I love my brother but dammit, guys. Of course he is dinosaur!”
“Your turn!”
I pick a random paper and instantly bite my lower lips. This is the end. How Jinki could know such a thing like this? How should I explain it?
“Quickly!! We’re running of time!”
Kibum and Minho back into a winning grin. I hate it so much makes me want to punch them in this very second.
“I don’t know whether you know or not, by any chance, the ice cream flavor I love the most?”
“Hahahahaha! That’s my word, Minho! My trick works out!”
Kibum squeals while clinging onto Minho side. Jinki frown a bit then confidently opened up his mouth.
“Matcha, isn’t it?”
“Damn it, Jinx! You’re not supposed to know that!!!”
If Kibum was that surprise, can you imagine how was I?
“Watch out, Kim Kibum! Oh! I get a good one!”
“Tell me! Tell me! Tell me!”
“Your favorite dish!”
“Mac and cheese?”
“Your turn and we’re even!”
Kibum start panicking and I can feel adrenaline inside my vein pumped up in a rapid speed.
“Listen, this is something we made for you!”
“Made for me? You guys made something for me?”
“Come on! It was there on your birthday!”
“My birthday?”
“It’s you––“
“STOP! EAT THAT, LOSERS!”
Minho jumped off the couch. Literally. And the next second Kibum join him. It’s initially a stupid games why they’re celebrating as if they win some lottery?
“No way!”
“Yes way, honey! Yes way!”
“I demand another round!”
“Pardon me?!”
Kibum’s hand hang on the air, can’t seemed able to swallow what I’ve just muttered.
“Back to your seat! We’re doing the other round.”
Jinki reads the atmosphere pretty well, he snatched some paper from his desk, ripped it into pieces and started scribbling on it. Minho grabbed some and writes down as well.
“Game on, bitches!”
***
People might try, but the faith has its own sentence. After some rounds, Jinki and I still lack two points behind the dynamic duo who just self-proclaimed themselves as game master. We condemned to buy late dinner and doing the dishes at the pantry. It sucks, but at least Jinki got his stir fried honey chicken as he wish earlier. My tummy is almost exploded, neither because of the s’mores, French fries, nor the chicken. It’s because of the sunshine man who keeps his sunny face up until this hour.
And the fact that he did know some personal stuffs of a dull person like me who only could yell, scream, shout, and curse, it worsen everything. My heart goes up and down, right and left, when he scooted a chair and sit in front of me, with my desk as the only barrier between us. You know, it’s only about 60-80 centimeters. Forget it, you wouldn’t care.
“It’s like have a blast from the past, what do you think?”
Jinki plays around with the rubic cube in his hand. As usual, without looking at it, his hands already know what to do with that puzzle.
“Yeah,” and then we fell into a super quite circumstance where I could hear clearly how Minho and Kibum nags to each other at the other room, “Jinki. Can I ask you something?”
“Anything, as long as I don’t need to swipe my card.”
“Excuse me, Sir. You think I’m that cheap?” he cracks on his seat and muttering just kidding, giving me a cue to restart the question, “How do you know that my Mom loves sunflower?”
“Well, Jonghyun and I hanging out often, more than you know.”
“And about I’m wearing sneakers except Monday?”
He beams into a simple smile and put the rubic down and as exchange, he lifted his right hand, placed the elbow on the surface to support his chin that suddenly brought his face few inches closer to me.
“Let say, I started caring a bit much of you around the same time you cared about my meals and filled up your daydream with a hope to cook me every day so I won’t having chicken as my lunch three times a week.”
He is indeed hanging out with Mr. Dinosaur too much. Something warm and tingling crept up my neck straight to the cheeks of mine, turned them into a deep shades of red in no time. And he smiles, with the same position, looks like my face is a rare art piece that worth such an admiring like this. By this rate, I do convinced that he cares about me after all this time but I was too busy being coward.
“Come on. Let me take you home.”
Nod. It was the rightest thing I could think in such a tiny time. He pulls back and heads to his desk, shutting down the computer with smiles still adorn his face. He was born to beam away I think.
“_______?”
“Ugh, yeah?”
“Is walking okay with you?”
“It is. No problem, today is not Monday, you know?” I show him my left food covered with old Chuck Taylor.
He chuckles and talks to himself before shot his head up to my direction, “Well then, I know place sells your favorite ice cream on the way. I think we should stop by. My treat.”
“At this very degree?”
“It’s never too cold for an ice cream. Get yourself ready.”
Bag already packed. Coat’s on. Desk neat enough to be left. I’m ready. So does my heart.
“Umm, Jinki?”
“Hmm?” he just hummed to let me know he’s listening while he busy collecting his belonging.
“Do you want to come over to my house from Christmas supper?”
Please say yes or I would shot my head with the green stapler which came in the corner of my sight.
“A Christmas supper with your Mom’s signature potato gratin?”
He even remembered such a detail?
“And roasted chicken, carrot soup, and caramel pudding.”
“What a temptation! I’m in. As long as I didn’t come as Jonghyun’s date.”
The toothy smile on his face answered every single question ever popped in my head. This is ridiculous. I wait almost three years for such a simple conversation like this. As I walk closer to his desk, I knew my brother did an amazing work – whatever it is – to let this man before me realize how hard I fell for him. And whatever it is, I don’t care how embarrassing it would be when I knew it sooner or later, I’m going to thank Jonghyun for having such a guts that bigger than his sister’s.
“Oh you won’t if Jonghyun has a sister who will cook your lunch starting tomorrow.”
***
Long time no Jinki’s! Here, an almost 5000 words of him kkkkkk. It supposed to be post a week ago. But my external hard disk ruined everything by dispelling the file so I need to re-write it from the very start T________________T
But what’s in the past stay in the past, so here we go, another story inspired by Love Actually, the part when Harry called Sarah into his room. Of course with a lil bit change and my own sprinkle and glints of what exactly I’m doing for living. Hahaha. This might be shabby or a bit disconnected in the middle, but enjoy! Thanks for reading and your support! XOXO
You're still on my mind somehow
You're fit and you're shades of blue
There's no way to go back now
Couldn't get back even if we wanted to
– Arcadia (The Kite String Tangle)
***
In life, unfortunate things happened as if it’s regular. Broken wings, broken hopes, broken promises, and broken hearts are as usual as sunrise every morning or snow in winter days. When a day grew colder, only the soul inside who can decide to stay warm or freeze just likes the wind.
‘If this is not what you want then what?’
‘I don’t know. You tell me.’
‘Please don’t be that cold person I hate.’
‘I’ve been this cold since I was born. Since my Dad left my family with his glamorous mistress. Since life decided to play some filthy game on me. Since forever.’
‘You’re not. Don’t you tire of hiding?’
‘If this the only way to not being hurt, then I wouldn’t ever feel bored of it.’
‘_______, come on. Give me a chance. Give yourself a chance.’
‘You blown out once.’
A wound inside the heart had two choices. To be healed or to be neglected until it turned into crack that put some distance in between. Both of the options sure requires some consequences, whether it’s something joyful or something’s dreadful.
‘Not like this. Do you think I’m just a game that you can play when you bored?’
‘Who said that for God’s sake?!’
‘No one said but you certainly showed me that.’
‘It’s just your insecurity climb up the surface all over again. We passed that period long time ago, _______.’
‘I’ve came way too far to trust myself that I’d able to open up. You know that. You made it that way.’
‘It’s not you. It’s me you didn’t trust to.’
***
I must have forgotten to draw the curtain again.
It seems already in the morning when common sense back to strike my head. Surprisingly, no dizzy or heavy feeling attacked means last night I probably just overslept or too tired rather than spared some futile time at Key’s lounge or gulping down tons of coffee with Taemin at works.
When my eyes flickered opened, I caught shadow of other limb lying down beside me, his eyes perfectly shut.
Shoot! Someone’s in my bed!!
I wonder what kind of mess exactly happened last night. Not a morning person I am, I drive my eyes to my right side and found another clue.
This is not my bed. Crap.
By this rate, I’m almost 100% awake and ready to punch whoever sleeps next to me who seems irresponsibly acting like nothing’s happened. The table immediately turned upside down when I flipped my back facing the suspect.
Sober as hell, I still believe it’s angel fell down to the earth and decided to share bed with me. Then whose room and bed it is doesn’t matter anymore.
Soft bangs occupy half forehead but unable to cover the beauty underneath. They spread haphazardly but somehow appeared like high-end art. Eyebrows thick as blood being the perfect cope for the closed eyes under. He looks so peaceful, like nothing in this world could annoy him. Like any would dare to, though. Eyelashes brush his fluffy cheeks, making sure filled the space before dark circle came the other night.
I make my position more proper and unconsciously gulping air down when I had this urge to land my hand to the said cheeks and drift it down to the pouty plump lips and forever not leaving it. Looking down to his chest, I notice how he breathed so stably, in a way it could make an exquisite rhythm of lullaby.
And if still a debatable statement whether this guy is an angel or not, I chose to come out with another possibilities that he’s a five year old boy trapped inside an adult body. Take this innocent look as the evidence, everyone would believe he sounds like a little bunny.
“Are you done admiring me? Can I open my eyes now?”
Warm feeling crept up your face, leaving red blush as trace. As instant, I’m about to turn my back against him, but a soft hand cut me on the way, caught my own inside his and pulled my entire torso closer to his chest until I can feel his breath on my skin.
Heart thumping like crazy, I’ve come to realize he’s always able to find me and put me in his range just to make sure I’m perfectly save.
As smile bloomed on his face, his eyes gradually snapped open, drowned me on that deep dark coffee color.
“I wonder why I even broke up with you.”
“Twice,” I almost humming with the lump of air stuck inside my throat.
Slight of bitter life quick-crossed his face when he flee his hand to my face, fixing some bangs and tuck my hair behind my ear, “I’m sorry. I promise I would never leave you anymore.”
“Quite bullshit isn’t it? Don’t you dare promise me anything.”
“Let’s change that a bit, then. I promise I would never stop loving you because someday I might leave you. For few hours, few days, probably months, or even forever. But sure, heaven knows that I will still love you.”
I didn’t notice tears streamed down my face until his fat fingers wiped it from my cheeks. Hand pushed the back of my head to his embrace where I followed quietly until he nuzzled his nose to the top of my heart.
Five minutes in silence until he drawn my chin up and our eyes reunited in giggles which feels a lot like first love. No matter how cold I am, how hard my heart is, this soul wrapped me here always able to melt my world. End of discussion, he is indeed an angel. It’s final.
“I love you, _______.”
Then I drown myself deeper when he rest his soft lips onto mine, brush it with care and kiss me like this is the last day on earth. Our way might be as chapped as our lips, but this kind of kiss, this kind of moment, sure will make everything’s easier than we had ever thought.
I love you, Lee Jinki.
***
MY HEART!! Quick scribble in an hour. Gaaah, I’m struggling catching up with the drabble challenge, I am sooooo behind schedule. This is supposed to fill yesterday spot but I passed out last night and wake up this morning with sore throat. Huhu L but the thing makes me so energized is to meet you all through this words. Thanks for your support and once again your time for reading this not-so-edible-soul-food. I’ll post another story after working hours! So excited! See you! XOXO!
I’m so lucky to have you
So happy to love you
Don’t wanna live without your love without your love
Without your smile
Without your sentimental
Cause I know I love you
– Lucky Me (Mocca)
***
Ray of sun’s battling to enter the very room when I pulled the curtain and let some light showered the room. And even if bundled under thick comforter, Jinki found it disturbing his precious morning, makes him crawled deeper and continued his journey to galaxy far far away.
I walked closer to him and yanked the blanket without thinking that he’s much stronger than me, ended me up intruding his territory, flat tummy laid beside him on the bed.
“Five minutes, please.”
Nothing’s more sexier than Jinki’s morning rumbles, husky tones from throat, eyes closed, and mouth pouting cutely you might choked yourself with such a view.
“Come on, birthday boy. We’re going to be late.”
Waking him up with such harm is a futile action that I learnt since the first month we were dating, so I rather peck his nose while hands slyly peeled the blanket down.
“It’s my birthday. I deserve something’s decent.”
“And it’s my Mom’s birthday too! We’re agree to attend the lunch party she held.”
His eyes still shut tightly, but I’m sure he’s already awake, “Why can’t you choose me over your Mom?”
“You married to me a year ago after dating me for five years. You know the answer already.”
“But honey, I’m so tired.. can we go there a bit late?”
I leaned closer, nose almost touch each other, and make sure he could feel breath on his chin, “If we’re coming late, we’re back home late. And if we’re back home late, you’re getting another present later.”
Someone’s suddenly unwrapped himself from his cocoon and thrown his blanket away, “Captain Lee to the rescue!!” he gave me a deep kiss before rushing to the shower, “I can’t wait for the present!”
I’m still laughing so hard on the messed up bed when he yelled from the bathroom, “Honey, how about the present for your Mom?! I was so bu––“
“I got it two days ago when I went shopping with Jonghyun!”
Suddenly he stormed out with only boxer left, “The best wife ever!” then he showered me with butterfly kisses all over my face.
“Go away you, pervert!!”
He singsongs right away, mixing some happy birthday songs with chicken and dumpling in the lyrics on the way back under the shower.
“Happy birthday, Mr. Lee!”
My Mom’s gardener greets us from the front yard when we arrived in front of her fence. An old man with wrinkles and thin arms smiles widely and hugged Jinki abruptly when we finally entered the yard.
“Ugh, wow, okay. I’m flattered. Thank you so much, Mr. Park! I’ll bring you bucket of chicken in the next visit!” his face drawn happiness and perplexes at the same time, meanwhile I only could let out giggles behind his shoulder.
“How the hell he could know my birthday?”
“I don’t know, maybe you’re too famous!”
“Please don’t say you put my name a happy birthday message on a billboard at the intersection!”
I rolled my eyes to his exaggerated expression which looks silly rather than annoyed, “Honey, as much as I love making surprises for you, I’m so not doing that kind of stuff.”
The bells need to be rang two times before it finally opened with my vibrant Mom behind the door.
“Happy birthday, Mom!!” I run to her and kiss her cheek, hug her tight so both of us can’t even breathe.
“Thank you, thank you, oh my God! You’re getting fatter, what Jinki gave you?! You’re suffocating me!” I released her and grin but she just let it slipped because the next second she’s already kissing Jinki’s cheek, shocking both of us, “Happy birthday, you, Mr. Sunshine! Look at that handsome face! Isn’t it too young for such a middle age man?”
“Eeeyyy, I’m still young, Ma’am! Strong and alive! Happy birthday to you too!”
I almost forget who is Jinki’s wife because right now, the one who’s clinging to his side and linking their arm together was my Mom. Not that I would mind with this rare and beautiful view.
“Come on! The party wouldn’t start without you!”
We were dragged to the living room with my Mom unstoppable ranting on the way there. He looks like someone who’s getting kidnapped, asking me some help through his eyes, but I can’t help but cracking at the scene.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JINKI!!”
It supposed to be my Mom’s birthday lunch which is limited to Mom, Dad, me, Jinki, Minho and his fiancée but what we found there are at least half population of a high school class.
Kibum, his wife, their twins, and – not being left at the house – Comme De and Garcon. Jinki’s brother Taemin brought his new girlfriend along. Even Jonghyun who said will be out of town until next week.
“What’s this?” Jinki’s dumbfounded by lots of love filled the air.
“It’s your birthday party, idiot!” Jonghyun and Minho approach and squeeze him in a human sandwich. People start cheering a bit louder and Taemin raise his glass to make a toast for his brother.
“Is this your idea?” when Jonghyun and Minho back to their place, he tilted his head to my side still in disbelief.
“Nope.”
“Really?”
“I swear to God! But whoever came up with this plan must be worked really hard. Foil balloons and colorful origami along with too much Christmas lamp, like seriously? I have two suspects right now, Kim Kibum who always got a bit more energy than us or my very own mother who loves you too much sometimes I almost got jealous on her.”
“Kibum’s busy with his new bag’s launching, too busy to prepare. Oh, Gosh! Like mother like daughter,” he cracks right away by his own statement.
And that’s the most wonderful scene to be seen, Jinki’s feeling loved, burst into laugh eyes get all teary shaped in half moon. So I tugged his collar down to reach his lips for a kiss, “Whatevs. Happy birthday, Lee Jinki! I love you.”
When he slipped his hand around my waist, I heard people clapping behind my back vaguely.
***
The water is running down my hand on the sink when warm hands find their way on my waist and chin rested on my shoulder. I continue washing the dish with Jinki attached behind me, chest enclosed with my back.
“What?”
He doesn’t answer it and just kissed my ear or nuzzled at the crook of my neck at the other time.
“It’s ticklish. Let me finish this.”
“Emmhh.”
I can feel he’s shaking his head on my shoulder, so I turned back facing him and rest my hand behind his neck after dried it on the nearest table cloth.
“You’re another year older.”
“And another year happier.”
I pull him for another kiss. This one is more intense since we had our private time at the kitchen so I’m not complaining when it includes tongue and teeth.
“About the present you talked about this morning,” muttering on my lips which I replied with giggles, “What’s that?”
“I’m not telling you,” finally apart to take some breath, I closed his forehead with mine.
“Is it big?”
“It could be.”
“Ugh, come on!”
“God! Is it your fifth birthday or something?!”
“I won’t let you go if you’re still not telling me!”
“Fine!! Go get me my purse!”
“Right away, Mrs. Lee!!”
Less than two minutes he’s back with purse in his hand and smile brighter than the sun and wider than the ocean across his puffy cheeks. His eyes entail me when I search something inside.
“Well. It’s not the one I expected,” he took the saffron colored enveloped from me anyway, “What’s this?”
“You can check it yourself.”
He raised his eyebrow in curiosity then with a huge enthusiasm he opened it to find a small white stick with two red stripes on it.
“I don’t get it.”
“There’s more.”
He pulled the paper inside, scanned it quickly and the next second his eyes bulging out, confirm what he saw just now by look at me and the paper on his hand one and another.
“Wh––What..? How?”
“Remember when I said I was feeling unwell and nausea a week ago and I thought it’s just because I got overworked and stressed with the next exhibition preparation? The next day I went to the doctor the next following day. He gave me the test pack and yeah..”
“So it means..”
“Yeah, maybe around Sept–– OH MY GOD!!”
He cut me off on the way by scoping me from the ground and squeezing me hard until while his lips kiss me anywhere he felt to left invisible mark furiously. Something warm fell on my cheeks, not sure what it was until I saw his face drenched with tears.
“Jinki, we need to be more careful,” I pushed his chest lightly, hope not to kill the mood.
He put me down but still showering me with his kiss, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It’s just.. Shit. _______! I am so happy! I.. I.. I don’t know what to say!”
“Me too, honey.”
“This is the best birthday ever. I love you so much, _______! You make me the happiest person on earth!”
My face cupped by soft fingers so carefully as if it made from thin antique ceramic that can be shattered anytime people held it too tightly.
“I can’t believe this happening! I love you so much!! I love you, I love you, I love you soooooo damn much!!”
The Christmas carol played by my Dad on the turntable is no longer heard. People’s chatter on the living room is disappeared gradually. The clock ticking, the water dripping, the wind rumbling, nothing’s going through our ear. Because right now the only back sound we heard is my heartbeat. And Jinki’s. And the little angel’s inside my belly. Our eyes closed in sync, enjoying the quite, and embracing each other company because starting tomorrow, it’s not only both of us. It’s three.
My chest pressed onto him while his chin rests on the crown of my head. His heartbeat marched gleefully, sent my hands to clutch on his back, in rhythm with him caressing mine.
“Happy birthday, Papa.”
***
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE MOST PRECIOUS BABYBUNNY IN THE WORLD! Happy birthday, Lee Jinki! Wish you all the greatest things in this universe! Stay young, stay healthy, stay humble, and stay hungry! And for my beloved Mom who I can’t hug at this very time, happy birthday, Mom! You’re the best thing that ever happened in my life! Wait for me, I’ll be home for Christmas! Stay warm, peeps! See you tomorrow! And I hope with the better stories! XOXO!
No amount of coffee, no amount of crying
No amount of whiskey, no amount of wine
No, no, no, no, no,
nothing else will do
I've gotta have you, I've gotta have you.
– Gotta Have You (The Weepies)
***
Four weeks passed by after that dreadful night. The night I want to forget for the rest of my life, the night I wished never happened at all. The scene of long silence driving after painful arguments and broken dreams is flashed slowly once again in my mind. Convinced myself by the remained faith that today would be at least less drowsy and awful than yesterday, I opened the bedroom door to find Minho being nice roommate as usual, offered me toasts he made.
Like I had any appetite.
“Mr. Park texted me. He needs some preview for the promotional video by next week. Can you finish the scoring on Sunday?”
I spread my gaze to the sleepy digital calendar at the corner. It’s Tuesday. Crap. I even couldn’t manage to remember what day is it.
“Okay. As long as you could be ready with the final cut by Thursday.”
At least I had some part time jobs as helpful distraction. Or else, I think I might ended up hanging myself under the old elm outside the gym hall at our campus. Obviously, I seemed can’t get over her while on the other hand she seems totally fine and continues her life like our story just an ad in Thursday drama on TV.
“Dude, are you alright?” Minho’s tugging my worn out shirt timidly. Darted awake once again, I tilt my head to his side.
“Yeah. I’m good. Why?”
“Really? You’ve been spacing out for at least five minutes in front of the fridge.”
When my eyes landed on my hand, I realized today might be worse than yesterday since it’s barely eight in the morning and I held the fridge opened but nothing’s pulled from inside.
I walk down the hall which now is not as busy as the other month. Final’s coming and some students tend to spend their precious time at the library or the art studio or chemistry laboratory instead wandering around the campus. Hands kept safely inside my pocket, I strolled closer to the marched colorful lockers. Sigh eventually slipped out my nose.
You can do this, Jinki.
Right when I opened it, every memory about her started coming up to the surface, failed to be locked under the sea. It’s already more than a month since we walked our own path, but still, I haven’t put it down yet. She’s there, captured beautifully by the polaroid photo I pasted inside, smile as bright as sunshine. And her notes with little cute handwriting she hates the most, telling me not to spend recklessly and take a rest as much as I could.
Felt like I made terrible mistake, I close it after dragged out the some CDs for the pre-listening finals. I just need to go to the library quickly to compile it with my other work then heading back home to minimize the chance I’d bumped into her.
But let’s say that fates agree to disagree.
“_______! Where are you going?! Why don’t you pick up my phone?”
Even hearing her name is a torture for me. As if I splashed by full bucket of dry ice, my mind frozen and itchy at the same time by the scene not too far in front of me.
“I left my phone at home. Wanna join me to the library?”
Kibum rolled his eyes, regretting his encounter with her.
“What are you going to do?”
“Of course studying for finals! You should do that too! What else?! I’m not gonna cry my ass at the dark corner until my asthma caught me.”
Did she know I’m in her range? She must be notice my existence.
Heart sunk deep into my stomach, I almost throw up at the moment with her cold words. It doesn’t sound like her, though she looks vibrant just like the other day.
“Naaah, I’m good. Find me at the studio when you’re finished. There’s a new dumpling shop I want to try.”
She bid her farewell and flicked her hair before walked passed me as if I’m invisible. I didn’t expect a warm greeting but I didn’t expect a gesture of total stranger like this neither. And Kibum saw it all. As a great friend of mine, he just shrugged and shook his head, gave me a pity look, and turned his back leaving the crime scene.
“Jinx!” Jonghyun half-slaps my shoulder snapped me into reality, “I was looking for you everywhere. Ready to finish our project?”
“Of course. Let’s go to the recording room.”
“What? Did you say library last night?”
“I changed my mind. Shall we?”
***
A warm delicacy is the best cure for winter day and also scarred heart. So here I am, at my favorite coffee shop which I didn’t expect to be this crowd despite its unknown record. Hopefully, the barista works doubled hard compared to the other day, so within time, I got this large paper cup with fresh brewed Americano inside.
Usually, when I was in a rushed or came here by myself, I’d glided out right after the barista hand me my order. But today, I don’t feel like coming home early since my unstable situation would make Minho more worried. Struggled slipping myself among the queuing, I managed to not spill any from my cup and reach my favorite spot.
Unfortunately, it’s already occupied. And living with actually no luck for these past months, it happened to be the person I want to meet the less who flopped on the velvet fabric.
“Can I sit here?” She lifted his head and torn right away when she caught my face in sight, “I won’t be long. I just need to finish one cup. Please, nowhere to sit anymore.”
Indeed, the shop is too small to accommodate such a crowd. Nothing came out from her, it means she’s not telling me to go.
“How are you doing?”
“Broken hearted,” she answered right away, eyes not leaving the book opened on her laps. I remember this kind of view. She’s being the smarty ass since young age, reading or doing some college works while waiting for me finished my classes. It looks almost the same beside this invisible wall between us.
“You seemed happy to finally apart from me.”
“I don’t need more audience for my devastating moment.”
Little heart attack stopped me breathing right away. How on earth I could conclude it that way? I can see clearly from where I sit, she’s broken as bad as me. The dark circles under her eyes can’t lie. The disheveled hair, chapped skin on her lips, the pale cheeks – they can’t lie. Her fingers trembled under the book, sent me shiver down my spine.
“Do you ever miss me?”
“Please, don’t start, b–– Jinki.”
“Do you ever miss me, _______?”
“Do you?”
I put down the cup and leaned front, try searching for my last hope inside her weary eyes, “All the time.”
Is it tears forming in her eyes? Or it is just me being foolish and hopeless romantic?
“_______, I’m so–– Listen. I’m re––“
“Jinki, I need to go. See–– Good bye.”
One quick bitter smile on her face, and she’s gone, left me in another agony. She never said good bye before because she thinks it was too awful to be said.
‘Why’d you say good bye if you know there’s no good at all in parting? I prefer to say ‘see you’ regardless what will happened next. At least, we put some hope and by that hope I believe both side would work in any possible way to make it happened.’
And I do want to make it happened.
***
Minho’s shouting at the door calling me to go back inside the house still roaming inside my head when I walk down the street under the drizzled hard snow at eleven at night. Everything’s not in the right place and I’m tired of standing still without being able to spoke out what I feel inside. If anything’s not worked as it planned, as I wish, at least I’ve tried.
And the answer of my heavy heart sparks its magic when the oak door in front of me finally creaked open.
“JINKI! What the hell are you doing here almost midnight?! You’ll get sick! And what’s with this crap?!” she shrieked right away when she realized I’m about to make a mess. Her eyes bulging out, and when I found it’s care instead of anger in her eyes, my heart contented it almost ran out my chest.
Please, don’t close the door.
One by one, I started to flash the placards in my hand. When she didn’t close the door despite the harsh breeze, I throw the first one and continue to the second.
Remember this shirt you gave me in our first Secret Santa?
I lift my coat to show her what I wear inside.
“You wore it twice,” she snarled half-heartedly.
Which put me on ease.
I knew you would say that.
It’s because I love it too much I’m afraid it gets worn out.
She rolled her eyes, try hard not to struck with mine.
I didn’t have chance to say I’m sorry. Or much to say I love you.
The girl in front of me bites her lower lips and taps her room shoes impatiently.
Here I am, bid you my farewell, just because I think you deserve a decent goodbye.
It’s tears I see flowing down her cheeks.
Regardless this is what I want or what you want, I need you to know.
TO ME, YOU’RE PERFECT.
And for the rest of my life, my heart belongs to you.
The last card thrown to the ground and I felt huge weight lifted from my shoulder, take out the lump inside my throat so I able to breathe again. Her face drenched by tears only one stream earlier. I stretch my hand out and wipe the warmth over her cheek, just like the old times when she breakdown in front of me.
“Take care, _______. See you.”
I collect the cards around me and crept home after I pat his head I hope not for the last time.
***
My eyes flickered open when my phone shakes next to me the next morning. Dizziness attacks when I turned my head to the side, trying to check it with all souls and common sense I could gather in tiny times. And by the letters popped up on my screen, my heart already exploded before I could get myself composed.
And for the rest of my life, my love is all yours.
Turned out, we’re not that good in parting, so why bother saying goodbye?
Well, see you then :*
Four weeks passed by after that dreadful night. The night I want to forget for the rest of my life, the night I wished never happened at all. But this very morning, for the first time in like forever, I’m convinced, no, I believed, that today definitely would be better than it could ever be.
***
Inspired by my number one Christmas themed movie ‘Love Actually’! I’m so happy with this one though it's not quite fluffy and rather angsty. Both Love Actually and Jinki are my favorites, so why not! Who doesn’t love them, anyway?! Haha! And what’s Christmas without love? So better tell the people you love the most that you love them when you had a chance. Some things are meant to be said even though you showed them every day. Enjoy the holiday atmosphere, because yaaaasss, it’s start to look a lot like Christmas! See you! XOXO!
