#john masterman

[umbrellaguyofficial]

Masterman gave me his coat this morning and I'm gonna burn it. Yes, it's unprofessional but so is he.

[wearethemastersman]

oh my godd @umbrellaguyofficial is trying to start beef with me in my DMs because I 'misgendered' her umbrella

[wearethemastersman]

did you take millie’s hat? it’s grey, it’s a cockney hat (bc that’s what cockneys wear)

@jean-is-2bright4tea

I would NEVER.

*Walks away in suspiciously cockney hat*

[wearethemastersman]

Maybe your umbrella sucks, huh??

Have you thought about that

You don't need anon on Michael. I know it's you. To hell with your stupid umbrella I hate him

[that-novelist-guy]

I just woke up and why the hell am I on the floor with several bruises, a black eye, and I think a broken wrist? What the hell happened yesterday at the party????

I barely remember anything because of how drunk I was. Though I think that it had something to do with Masterman....

[wearethemastersman]

You do know that it's a KARAOKE PARTY right? And not a standing in the corner, drunk and pissed, while aggressively staring at Fleming party

in fairness i sung something

Under my breath

Well I said something

[wearethemastersman]

Bro none of the ladies wanna kiss you

*cries*

[that-novelist-guy]

I hate you, and your bloody novel, and your main characters nonsensical "catchphrase"

I mean "The names James. James." Did you hire a toddler to write that?

-@wearethemastersman

Oh fuck off John. I want nothing to do with you.