"The one time I was ever actually in a room with Paul, zillion people between me and him (and no way I'm gonna bother him, all of us who travel in celeb circles have people we're fans of and all of us inexplicably try to hide it to seem "cooler"), he was hitting whiskey a little hard, and apparently it makes him confessional because he started talking loudly about himself and John, and how hard it was not to have him there. (Of course I paid attention and scooted a little closer; when a Beatle speaks about a Beatle, and you've heard rumors about both of them, you want the tea.) I remember him saying something along the lines of not a day passing that John's not still in it with him, but it's not like he can pick up a phone and say, "Hey, just needed to hear your voice today," and even when he got craggy responses, he still missed them. He misses it all, and it's bothering to him that he misses him more as time goes on -- it doesn't heal, he just learns new ways to bandage the wound. Went on and on, and stopped just short of saying too much. He was waxing rhapsodic about John's hands, and finally I think the people he was with noticed interlopers paying attention, and changed the topic".
New JohnHeartPaul-community for the McLennon fandom?
Hi guys,
this is me veeery carefully asking whether anyone would be interested in joining a new community that could serve the function JohnHeartPaul used to have - that is, anything and everything abt John/Paul?
Ever since JHP sorta faded away, we haven’t had a proper community place for that sorta stuff - sharing headcanons, meta, facts, having an overall discussion about the relationship between John and Paul... sharing your art, sharing your fics, asking for help with writing/art/anything.... just, all that has been missing for the past five years or so, with most of the fandom now residing over here at tumblr dot com. we don’t have a community in the same sense as what JHP used to be. we’re all doing our separate blogging, and pray to some distant tumblr gods that our posts show up in the #mclennon tag. we don’t have long, interesting conversations about mclennon. we have lots of active, wonderful bloggers, but the sense of unity is missing that we used to have in the good old JHP days.
everything is just so...... separate now, and i’m yearning to have that sense of having a community back. anyone else?
i’m open for suggestions if anyone has ideas for how this could work, but i’m thinking of wordpress as the best platform. a new account is very easy to set up and the site is easy to use, and since the JP-Library is already run by wordpress it’d make sense for the new community to be there as well. but as i said, suggestions are welcome.
please tell me if you are interested at all!!
i’ve been thinking about this for a couple of years already, but i won’t do it if people don’t think they’d join. so please tell me your opinion!!
also, please, please REBLOG this post so that more people see this!
(see... something that having a community with email alerts would take care of... sigh. artists and fic writers would get so much more exposure as well!)
OK, I’m trying to do a master list while I have a minute and keep it updated/pinned because Tumblr’s algorithms are about as wonky as Facebook’s, I’ve noticed, and this keeps things nicely organized (and probably helps my OCD).
Never Gonna Hurt You Baby: (TRIGGER WARNINGS: ABUSE, OLD OFFENSIVE SLUR, MENTIONS OF ABUSIVE CHILDHOODS, CHOKING; set a year and a half after Ending C, this is follows Michael’s POV and delves into the past as he tries to come to grips with getting over some of his issues, and it’s a long one at about 30 pages, so fair warning.)
You Keep Me Together Like No One Has Ever Done: (And this is the companion piece to ODIWWUAA -- it was all just a dream; dedicated to the best person in the world even if they don’t often believe it <3)
One Day I Will Wake Up All Alone: (TW: I wrote this at a bad point, so it’s dark, but I also don’t completely hate something I wrote for once, so if you don’t mind major character deaths -- from their own hand -- then read at your own risk)
(and the lovely commissioned artwork by Hugo which I’ll never not tag that because dfjdklklhjflkajdflkj: https://thenoman-sland.tumblr.com/post/627924072953790464/so-this-is-a-commission-i-did-based-on-this-post )
Multichapter Stories:
All You Are Is Brand New (The Beginning):
This is the one that @marina-rasteniye and I talked about, the idea of Michael viewing Trevor as a toy, and I got to thinking about Michael viewing everyone in the terms of something to manipulate. Especially given his line in the game about how he gets an attachment to something, goes after it, gets bored, hates it, gets rid of it, etc. It’s dark, but does have good moments. Basically, a flip-side to Toxicity.
The one that started it all back in August? It began with watching a person’s video on how they did their college psychology thesis on Trevor Philips having borderline personality disorder, and I thought, “That makes sense,” because I see a lot of my own actions in him and vice versa. I began going through bad bouts of suicidal ideations, and because mental healthcare is a joke where I live, I was told to write my feelings out, so since I found Trevor relatable (similar shitty childhoods, lack of direction, anger/sadness over a lack of affection, etc.), that’s what I did. I understand him probably too well, unfortunately. That said, people with borderline personality disorder are not complete psychos. We have feelings. We’re human. We tend to fall in with the wrong people who use us, and we keep making excuses for them, thinking something will change, that some day will be the day they appreciate us, but they never do. And then we hate ourselves all over again. It’s a cycle I’ve worked hard to break with therapy. I’m not always perfect, unfortunately. I’m a work in progress.
I wanted to use Toxicity as a means to show how a person gets to the point of Trevor in 2013. And I want to show how he can redeem himself in the future because it is possible. I know, personally.
Warning Sign/The Beginning: (Chapter One) -- and I can’t edit the post any longer or fix the length behind a cut because Tumblr is being stupid bleh DX
Once upon a time I was a moderator on the LJ community ‘johnheartpaul’, where people discussed (and shipped) all things Lennon/McCartney.
At one point I organised a group writing project based on the trip they took to Paris in 1961. I did a quick search and that fic is still up:
Je · Ne · Regrette · Rien
~ two drifters in the city of light ~
I contemplated moving the fic over to AO3, but since it’s not my writing I’m not sure whether that’d be the right thing to do. (It’s been so long that I don’t even know how to contact most of the authors anymore).
