#jtalkstoherself

[jtalkstoherself]

I really love being out with my family but being in a very loud place (dave&busters) mixed with my anxiety is not helping.

[jtalkstoherself]

Was getting really out of breath during my run, I was about to stop for a break even though I hadn't hit my check-point yet and then what comes on my playlist but MUATHA-FU*KING 'BULLETPROOF'!!! I was laughing so hard I must have looked like a crazy person but it kept me running at least! I had to do it for the cinnamon roll!

[jtalkstoherself]

I don't understand bathrooms that don't have bins in the stalls, what's that about? Hello yes, I'm a female, I need to throw things away sometimes, preferably in private. DO YOU NOT BELIVE IN MENSTRUATION?!?!?!

[jtalkstoherself]

Workout

Came to the park for a jog and as soon as I start my first lap my period just decides to get way heavier than it was yaaaaaay

[jtalkstoherself]

Moods

Dealt with a lot of anxiety today. I'm not sure if it's because I haven't been doing much lately. It's been close to two months since I've gone back to work. I haven't really been doing anything productive, haven't been in the mood to draw or paint or write.. My days have just kind of been bleeding into each other. Husband was home sick today but I felt so selfish because instead of taking care of him as well as I would've liked to, he ended up having to deal with my anxiety. He comforted me and cradled me. He's so good to me. I just wish I could believe him when he says I don't have to apologize for being the way I am. I guess that's the anxiety talking though. All in all, weird day, I just wish I could sleep.

[jtalkstoherself]

Recovery coming to an end

So, for the past couple of days I've been able to work out and go running without fainting or any kind of incident which leads me to believe that I'm pretty much out of the woods. Looks like I've pretty much made a full recovery and am so grateful for that. It felt wonderful to run and just feel the wind on my body. To enjoy that freedom again, there's few things that compare.

[jtalkstoherself]

Lazy trash

So I haven’t really kept up with actually ‘blogging’ like I said I would.. It’s been a crazy couple of months, got pretty sick and am barely starting to feel like myself again. I honestly encourage everyone to get checked out if you're just not feeling well or yourself. Please don’t neglect yourself and your health, I’m speaking from freshly acquired experience, just please don’t do it.

Anyways, I can’t promise that I’ll be updating often, but I do see more quick entries coming in the future. Along with the recovery I’ve notice that my anxiety has started up a bit more again, probably from all the bedrest, so I think writing things out will help with that. Apart from maybe getting a diary for the more personal aspects of my rambling thoughts..

Either way, this will mostly be for myself, although if anyone at all finds my little musings interesting, well, you’re more than welcome to read along.