#just zookeeper things

[heyyitsjayy]

Me: Little baby pit viper for the love of God, I’m begging you to eat this PLEASE.

Baby Pit Viper:

[kessuburd]

Saw this ad and my first thought was "Ah yes, Leopard Piss Perfume"

[telepathicorbit]

Sent this to some friends on discord but it really should be here:

please imagine for me, a lanky, genderqueer 19-year-old with a face full of acne, standing at the top of a pit looking down into it. the pit is full of wolves, and also an armless dude who is simultaneously wrestling with the wolves and debating at them in the classical athenian style. all around this scene is a zoo, with broken-open enclosures and an army of reptiles swarming. 

 "you've got a phone call!" the kid calls down into the pit 

 the guy in the bottom pins a wolf and looks up. "who from?" 

 "someone called eve? said she's friends with someone called kinsey?" a python slithers toward the kid and they run around to the other side of the pit. 

"I'm a little busy here! if she can come see me at five, we can talk then!" says the man. 

 the kid is about to ask a follow-up question when, with a great, inaudible bellow, the giraffe rounds the corner at full speed. the kid panics and runs back to the information office, dodging toads and the very angry baboon, re-assembles the furniture barricade in front of the door, and picks up the phone to deliver the message to the person waiting on hold.

welcome to the night vale zoo. it is a normal thursday.

( @nightvalelibrary)