“Alright, so it might be pretty but I didn’t plant this grass in my yard for decoration. The neighborhood kids kept playing on my lawn and that’s really annoying. So I planted the grass and filled it with snakes. The bites aren’t enough to kill anyone but they sting and make you lose feeling for a while..
..The other day I watched one of the little bastards walk through my grass. He suddenly screamed and took off running with a limp leg. I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time.”







