warnings: mentions of food/eating (esp in felix and jeongin’s)
note: so. apparently i write for skz now.
찬 - chan
having a nightly routine together
omg so cute
so adorable
you guys are literally like the old married couple that’s still deeply in love with each other <3
and lowkey grosses everyone out with how whipped you both are <33
but anyways
we all know how chan is practically allergic to sleep
i am too tho tbh
but on the rare occasion that he’s actually home and plans on going to bed at a decent time
you both have a cute lil routine that you do together
like doing ur skincare routines for each other
being all giggly while applying the different creams and stuff :(
omg and if you do facemasks trying to make each other laugh while they’re on :((
and chan will always let you pick which one you want first bc he’s just nice like that :(((
making silly faces at each other in the mirror while you brush your teeth
omg and if you have longer hair you can bet ur ass he will brush it for you
and he’d be so gentle too 🥺
and then if you want he’d braid it for you as well
will absolutely hold you close as ur going to sleep and give you a forehead kiss before drifting off
“night, baby. love you.”
idk man where can i get a chan ://
rest of the members under the cut!
민호 - minho
going grocery shopping
going grocery shopping with someone is like . peak domesticity + intimacy imo
it’s just so cute <3
so wholesome <33
anyways be prepared to be made fun of for your food choices
“you’re getting that?”
“yes….?”
“okay….🙄”
definitely blames you for forgetting the grocery list
even if it was his fault
turns into a mom when he sees you trying to sneak food into the cart
“babe we already have 2 different kinds of cereal in here put that one back”
“sigh fine”
like don’t even try doing the puppy eyes on him bro
bc he’ll deadass just look at you like 🤨 and walk away lmao
would offer to lift you into the cart and push you around <3
except he acts like it’s such an inconvenience for him even tho he’s the one who offered??
lets out the BIGGEST sigh
“minho, honey, you’re the one who asked if i wanted to get in”
“well yeah why wouldn’t i?? you’d probably be complaining about how much your feet hurt with those ridiculous shoes you’re wearing sooner or later if i didn’t”
you were wearing sneakers but okay <3
we all know he’s allergic to showing he cares in obvious ways so we’ll save him his dignity for now
also!! sneaks in ur favorite snacks while you’re not looking
and doesn’t say a word about it unless u bring it up
“babe where did these come from i don’t remember getting them?”
and he’ll just shrug and be like
“i saw that we were running out so i grabbed some for you”
ur fave tsundere <3
창빈 - changbin
sharing clothes
listen
Listen
in reality
as someone who’s like . the same height as binnie
and definitely not the same size lmao
this would…..probs be a lowkey disaster
but in theory
this is the cutest thing ever
like 12/10 very pure very sweet
would recommend
like you two wear each other’s hoodies/shirts/whatever so much
you don’t even remember which ones are yours
definitely the type of bf where if he’s gonna be gone for a little while
he’ll spray his cologne on all the hoodies u like to steal
bc he knows how lonely you get :(
and how much you like his cologne :((
expects you to do the same for him lol
“babeeeee you’ve been gone so long why didn’t you leave any hoodies behind that smell like you 😢😢”
“i just saw you last night though??”
“exactly it’s been way too long”
will get very upset if you don’t share ur clothes w him
“changbin can i please have my hoodie back now?”
“don’t you mean our hoodie?”
*insert communist bugs bunny meme*
like idk what to tell you guys other than be prepared to have like half ur clothes stolen by ur bf <3
현진 - hyunjin
painting together
yes i’m an unoriginal bitch deal with it
but can u IMAGINE
ur in his room
the canvas is on an easel right in front of you
you’re sitting on jinnie’s lap
and he’s just gently guiding your hand that’s holding a paintbrush :((
or he’ll just wrap his arms around ur waist and watch you paint on your own
and rests his head on ur shoulder
and gives u kisses on your cheek and temple occasionally
i’m not crying you are
OR
you both have your own paper/canvas/whatever
and decide to make something for each other
but the other can’t see it until you’re both done
i can guarantee no matter what you make hyunjin will tear up a lil bit
bc hello !! you made this with him in mind !!! he inspired this !!!!
and even if it’s not the most aesthetically pleasing *ahem*
he’ll still love it and think it’s the most beautiful thing ever :(
but whether u suck like me
or you’re the next monet
hyunjin will always love whatever you make <3
definitely hangs it up in his room
always has tips and pointers to give you if you ask for some
and always makes sure to be very nice and sweet when giving them :((
oh and be prepared for him to paint the most beautiful portrait of you ever bc ur boy is whipped <33
it’s just a very relaxing and peaceful time overall
지성 - jisung
going to the park together
i’m sure you all could tell from the headcanons/reactions i’ve posted before
but i am lowkey obsessed with going to a playground with someone at sunset/nighttime
when it’s just the two of you
and you can do stupid shit without people judging you lol
imagine sitting on the swing
and jisung just starts pushing you gently without you even having to ask
until at one point he grabs the chains and holds you back
and when you turn ur head to ask him what’s up
he just gives a sweet little kiss and then continues to push you :((
sobbing
or imagine going to a park at sunset
and sitting in a gazebo
and he teaches you how to play the guitar :(
and even if you make a lot of mistakes and don’t really get it
he’s still very patient and understanding :((
then when the sun sets completely
you guys will spread out a blanket
and lay down and star gaze
and while you’re pointing out different constellations and saying how pretty the stars are
all jisung can think is how you’re so much prettier in his eyes
goodbye it was nice knowing you all
필릭스 - felix
baking with/for each other
i know y’all probably saw this from a mile away
but is this not just . the cutest??
buying cookbooks for each other :(
trying out now recipes together :((
feeding each other the yummy sweets you made
you definitely get special s/o privileges too
like any time felix tries out a new recipe for something you’re always to first one to get to try it
or even if it’s something he’s made a million times before you still get the first one of whatever it is
omg and imagine getting in little food fights while you guys are baking too
and you never know who’s gonna start it
one minute you were mixing the cake batter
and the next thing you know you have a huge streak of flour on your cheek and felix is grinning all innocently at you
until smear some back right on his forehead 3
aside from that tho
baking with felix is honestly so much fun
bc even if you’re not the greatest at it he’ll be sure to help you with every step if you need it
and even if you make a mistake and ur cookies come out terrible he’ll still eat them
bc you made them
and it’s not the taste that matters but the love and thoughtfulness put into it
or at least that’s what he says
승민 - seungmin
changing the bedsheets together
okay i know this sounds a lil weird
BUT
changing the sheets together is low-key very cute imo
like even if you don’t live together
but he’s over at ur place just hanging out
and you start complaining about having to change your sheets
bc we all know changing sheets can be vv frustrating and kind of a workout
he’ll just be like “c’mon then let’s go do it and get it over with”
and suddenly changing the sheets isn’t so bad <3
as long as ur cute bf is there to help ofc <33
orrrrr
let’s say you guys just moved in together
and you finally have all your furniture and stuff in the apartment
but suddenly you realize that you forgot to buy bedsheets
so thus begins the adventure of going to the store and trying to find a set that you both like
bc something tells me that seungmin is very hmmm grandpa-like in his bedsheet preferences
think plain dark blue, or boring stripes, or maaaaaybe plaid if he’s feeling risky
and ur just like babe i love you but no <3
so finally you guys decide on a couple sets with both of you compromising a bit
a striped set (just not in that awful brown colour he first suggested), a floral set (just not the ugly sunflower one you were gravitating towards), and another just plain black and white one
congrats on both of you being adults about it i’m proud of u <3
정인 - jeongin
sharing food with each other
okay idk about everyone else
but as someone with several siblings
sharing food is like the highest form of love/trust lmao
and seeing as jeongin also has siblings
the moment he starts sharing his food with you is like a big milestone in your relationship
and you definitely get s/o privileges with it
bc rest assured if anyone else tries to take some of his food it’s game over
but you want some of his fries?
sure baby take as many as you’d like
and everyone else is just staring at you like 😲😲
because jeongin?
willingly sharing his food??
unheard of
but with you it’s like he’s a different person
omg imagine going on a date and you guys get some ice cream
and even tho you like the flavor you got
you can’t help but keep glancing at jeongin’s bc for some reason it looks really good??
and he just sighs, gets a spoonful, and holds it up for you to take a bite
because even if he acts like it’s such a chore
he secretly loves how comfortable you two are with each other
plus he knows that if you ever have food that he wants to try you’d offer him some in a heartbeat
gn!Reader x bf!Nct Dream, no warnings, 1.2k words, fluff
Mark
It was a super chill day at home, Mark was being his prime bf material self
I’m talking messy hair and glasses while he plays Justin Bieber on his guitar
So you’re both just kinda chilling on his bed, you sitting up against the pillows and him in the edge with his guitar
You’re scrolling on your phone when he starts singing, and you immediately turn your phone off to listen to his sweet voice
Fast forward to ten minutes later, he turns to ask you something and you’re knocked out on his bed
He just laughs, mumbling a “really dude?” before climbing up with you, pulling the blanket over you and snuggling in
Renjun
The type to pretend to hate it but actually makes heart eyes the entire time
Like you’re watching some dumb cartoon in the tv
And ofc you love spending time with your boyfriend <33 so you came to see him even tho you had an exhausting week
He noticed obviously, mentioning a few times that you could go lay down in his room, but you just waved him off.
Eventually you give in, and Renjun feels your head drop onto his shoulder, before sliding off at a weird angle so he has to fix it.
He shakes his head at the action, lightly wiggling your shoulder to bring you a little bit conscious
“You need to go lay down” he makes it a statement instead of a question this time.
“No, no I wanna stay with you.”
He just rolls his eyes and moves both of you to his bed instead, telling you to “not be so stupid next time and just sleep when you need to”
Jeno
He had taken you out that day to work out with him
It was tough, but you mostly kept up with him, something he was really proud of you for 💗
Except now you were dead tired, your entire body just completely drained from all the activity
“Baby let’s get some food in you hm?” He hums when he sees you staring off into space
“Mmm” you whine, feeling too tired to form words
“What?”
“Too tired, don’t wanna move.”
He smiles, ruffling your hair before standing up to grab a snack from the kitchen
You’re leaning back against the couch when he comes back, head lolling back and forth as you fight to stay awake.
“Baby open up,” he tells you, and you let him feed you a few bites.
You end up with food on your face, and he pauses to go back and get a napkin
He realizes, when he has to manually move your head to wipe your face, that you’ve fallen asleep
His eyes disappear into crescents as he brings you to rest on his chest, kissing your temple and eating the rest of your food himself
Donghyuck
The second you walked through the doors Hyuck had clung to your side, telling you how tired he was after his week of promotions
So you, being the good partner you are, told him the two of you could just relax and cuddle for the day, you were a little tired too anyway
However you soon realized that he wasn’t as tired as he led you to believe
“Hyuckie leave me alone I’m trying to nap”
“But ynnnn,” he whines from on top of you
“I thought you were tired. Or did you just not want me to be around the others?”
He doesn’t respond and you realize you’ve hit the nail on the head.
“Oh my gosh I’m right aren't I? You aren’t tired, you're just needy.”
He pouts, and you can’t help but soften at the sight.
“Maybe.. but your needy boyfriend wants your attention. Don’t you have to give it to me?”
“Fine, come here,” you give in, letting him lay on you and stroking his hair for him.
When your hands stop he whines, turning to check on you when you don’t respond to it and seeing you asleep
He laughs quietly about how he was the one saying he was sleepy and yet you were the one passed out on his bed.
He just lays back down on you, quickly following you into dreamland
Jaemin
The two of you had gone out the night before, now both laying in your bed while trying to wake up all the way
He rubs his eyes, looking down at you and seeing you squeezing your eyes shut in an attempt to block out the light
“Here baby,” his hands are immediately covering your eyes, shielding them from the morning light.
“You don’t have to do that Nana,” you giggle at his overdramatic antics, grabbing his wrist to remove his hand
“You’re right, you can just use me as a shield.” He motions to the spot between his head and chest, and you quickly lay in it, your breath fanning his collarbone.
“You’re so warm,” he mumbles after a few minutes, already feeling relaxed and practically asleep again.
You don’t respond, so he pokes your cheek a few times.
“Baby? Are you asleep?”
He takes your lack of response as a yes, smiling as he pulls you tighter into his body and gives in himself.
Chenle
You know that like challenge where you sit on your boyfriend's lap while he plays video games?
I honestly feel like that would be a kind of common thing in your relationship
Like neither one of you were very good at words, and you didn’t like pda in front of others so when you’re all alone you just try to absorb each other’s presence.
So you’re sitting on his lap, chest to chest while he types away passionately on his keyboard
You play with his hair whenever he gets a little too fired up, relaxing him with your touch against his scalp
You’re completely draped over him, and he finally closes the game out, laying his head against yours for a moment
He realizes you’re asleep when you don’t laugh at one of his jokes, and he quickly tries to pick you up to lay you on the bed
“Lele,” you mumble, having woken up at the movement.
“Yes love?”
“Did we win?”
He laughs, “well I definitely did,” he says, gently laying your head down on his pillow before crawling in next to you.
Jisung
He honestly wouldn’t even notice at first
Like you’d be having a movie night with the other guys and he’d spend the first half of the movie whispering to you
That is, until Hyuck told you to stfu because you were being louder than the movie
But ofc, no one realized that Jisung’s silly comments were the only thing keeping you conscious.
So when the movie gets boring and he isn't talking anymore, you quickly fall asleep.
Your head rests on his shoulder, and Jisung goes along with it, thinking it a sign of affection rather than a reaction of you falling asleep.
So he interlocks your hands, letting you keep your head there for the hour left
However, once credits start rolling the boys are paying a little more attention to what’s going on, one of them quickly realizing you’re asleep
“No they’re not, they’re just relaxing. That movie was boring.”
“Hey!” Renjun is offended since he picked the movie, but the other boys are too distracted to back him up
“Look at them.”
Jisung finally does, seeing you resting peacefully on his side
“Oh,” he says simply, some heat making its way to his cheeks.
He lets you stay there anyway, yelling at the boys for teasing him because he doesn’t want to wake you up
✿ SUMMARY. Park Sunghoon is head over heels for you but has never had the courage to confess. it’s a hopelessly one-sided crush, all until he recruits your best friend to play cupid. the only catch is that your best friend is Kim Sunoo, the very one who still happens to carry unresolved feelings for you in the shadowy depths of the friend zone. there’s no such thing as helping the competition in his book, only sabotage.
✿ PAIRING. secret admirer!sunghoon x fem!reader (featuring childhood bff!sunoo)
✿ GENRE. smau, high school au (hyung line + reader are 3rd years and maknae line are 2nd years), fluff, angst
✿ WARNINGS. cursing, ignore date timestamps (I tried for the first couple of chapters and gave up), more to be added later
✿ STATUS. on hold
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WARNINGS | explicit language, break-up, crying, mentions of an allergic reaction
SYNOPSIS | he knew that it was coming; that wasn’t what scared him. what frightened him the most was what would come after the separation.
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MASTERLIST
It wasn’t a surprise that he stayed late again to practice.
You were used to it by now.
Curling up in bed alone, you pulled the silky sheets up to your chin, rubbing your bare legs together in a feeble attempt to warm yourself, something that Seungcheol would usually do easily, engulfing you in his strong arms and surrounding you with a comforting warmth.
You weren’t quite sleepy yet. You could have turned on the TV that hung on the wall opposite of the headboard, or you could have turned on your phone and scrolled through a stupid app mindlessly for hours, waiting for Seungcheol to come home. But you didn’t. Instead, you laid there in the darkness alone, feeling nothing but the oddly heavy weight of the blankets on top of your body. You didn’t have to close your eyes to welcome the darkness that you craved, the cover of the storm clouds was enough. Usually there would be a sliver of silver moonlight pouring through the crack in your curtains, a mistake made by Seungcheol when the faulty curtains were purchased. They were just an inch too short, leaving room down the middle of the window, allowing those dribbles of moonlight to stream across your face when the moon was positioned just right. But you never told him of course, not after he’d put them up himself, oblivious to the fact that there was an inch of space between them, something that he was blind to since it didn’t reflect the moonlight over his side of the bed. The memory made you slip a single hand out from under the covers, cold air wafting over the exposed skin and raising goosebumps along your bare arm. You slid your hand over his empty side of the bed, stroking the small, almost unnoticeable indent in the mattress, shaped perfectly to his body from so many nights of sleeping in the same area in the same position. On particularly lonely nights, you loved nothing more than running your fingers along these indents, whispering in your head that this was where his shoulder would lay, and here his back. There it dipped into his waist and if you stretched all the way to the edge of the bed, there was his arm, tapering into his pretty wrist. You’d memorized this well by now, knowing all of his sleep habits and positions. If you thought hard enough, squeezed your eyes shut tight enough, you could almost pretend like these indents were the man himself.
You dragged his pillow away from its place at the headboard, hugging it to your chest and hesitantly pressing your face into the middle of it, where it dipped down; it was where his head lay night after night. It had a pleasant smell, since he never got into bed without showering first. You once asked him why, since you didn’t mind cuddling with him after practice even if he’d been sweating all day. A small part of you might have even liked the way he smelled after practice, musky and manly. You liked burying your face in his chest when you sat in his lap, legs splayed out on either side of his hips, and inhaling deeply. The smell of him, the smell of home. But he’d ruffled your hair, something you hated until he started doing it, and just scoffed, saying that he would never let his partner sleep next to a sweaty monster—here you laughed, because he’d stuttered when saying the word monster, unable to find a better word to describe himself—and kissed you on the forehead before heading off to shower away the events of his tiring day. You buried your nose deeper into the pillow, almost willing Seungcheol to come home already so you could smell the real thing, and felt weary at the thought, the repetitiveness of missing him. And really, the pillow didn’t smell like him, who were you kidding. It just smelled like his shampoo. Nothing musky, nothing like Seungcheol at all. His shampoo was only a small part of his scent.
You didn’t let go of the pillow, even though you probably should have. It was long enough to wrap your legs around it so you did, enjoying the way it molded to your body and gave you support, something that you usually got from wrapping your legs around your boyfriend. You sighed deeply, so deep that you let out a little wheeze at the end from the exhaust of your exhale, and stared into the darkness again, concentrating on the sounds of the pouring rain against the window panes. Heavy, fat drops thudded against the glass rhythmically, lulling you into a daze in between consciousness and sleep. Every now and then you could see a flash of lightning from between the curtains, lighting up the room in an eerie white glow for just a moment, before a deep roll of thunder grumbled, making your heart jump just a little at the unexpectedness.
In this state of limbo, you found yourself thinking about Seungcheol again, just a little. You were angry at the fact that you never saw him any more, yet angrier at yourself for being so petty; it wasn’t up to him. You’d chosen this, after all. You promised him that you’d stay with him, no matter what. It was a dumb promise, one that you’d made when you were hardly a teenager, but you’d kept it until now, and you didn’t want to even think about breaking it. Your heart throbbed painfully but you ignored it, instead directing your thoughts towards work and how much shit you had to take care of the next day thanks to your idiot co-worker. You directed your anger at Seungcheol to that co-worker too, imagining him floating away and taking all of your problems with him.
It was then that you heard the front door open, ears pricking up like a dog at the familiar sound. You could tell it was Seungcheol from the weight of his steps, the pause before he closed the door and locked it behind him, and from the heavy sigh as you heard him kick off his shoes and head towards the bedroom.
For some reason, you closed your eyes as yellow light flooded the room, pretending to be asleep. You’d always stayed up for him, but tonight you acted like you didn’t, foolishly hoping that if something changed, maybe he would too. You felt the bed dip down as he sat on the edge of your side, and a large, gentle hand smoothed your hair back. You resisted the urge to move, your throat swelling as you held in sudden tears. You could feel your lip quivering, and Seungcheol’s hand paused as he realized this too. “Are you awake?” he asked lowly, hoarse voice hardly above a whisper.
You nodded, not trusting your voice.
“I thought you were sleeping,” he said dumbly, and he stood up. You felt the bed rise again from the lack of weight. “I was just going to shower.”
You finally opened your eyes, your gaze being met with the warm light of the hallway flooded across the now-wrinkled sheets. The rain fell harder than ever, and you felt your skin prickle as another clap of thunder growled. Seungcheol, though he saw your jolt, did not move to comfort you as he usually did. You noticed this. “Okay,” you said numbly, and after just a moment of hesitation, he sniffled, rubbing his nose with a single finger, and began to exit the room. “Wait,” you said hastily, and he stopped immediately at the sound of your voice, now fully awake, yet still refrained from a normal volume. You were afraid that if you spoke too loud, you would shatter this illusion of him being home. “Can we… talk for a minute?” About what? You asked yourself this before he mirrored your words, and you swallowed past a rock in your throat, made of garbled words and rushed sayings. You knew what to say, you just didn’t want to. He sat back down on the edge of the mattress, and you knew he really wanted to just take a fucking shower and go to sleep, but you grabbed his hand and pulled it gently, asking him silently to come closer.
So he did. He exhaled loudly and pulled himself up onto the bed with a paternal grunt, and you finally laid your eyes on your boyfriend after so many lonely hours. He was clad in a black hoodie and gray sweats, a usual practice outfit. You could tell that he’d been wearing a hat all day too, judging from how matted his hair looked. His face was tired, but handsome as ever, and that only made your heart ache more. You still held his rough hand in your grasp, and he untangled his appendages from yours, only to link your pinky fingers, something stupid he started doing when you were just kids. Just kids in love, with no cares in the world. Those kids are gone now, you thought, and in their place are two tired ghosts of weary adults. Those adults are us.
As always, he didn’t pressure you into saying anything right away. He knew that you liked to think before you spoke, and he often commented on how he appreciated how careful you were with your words, something that always made you smile. After being told your whole life to hurry, hurry, hurry, just say the damn thing already, you liked being able to take it slow with someone who understood. But, you thought, sometimes understanding isn’t enough on its own. This was what you thought as you looked into his eyes, ringed with tired purple marks, and said, “Maybe we should end it.”
“It?” he asked slowly, and you wondered why you couldn’t say break up, why you had to make it sound so final, so… culminating. Oh, perhaps that was why. To make sure it really was over, to make sure there was no chance of reigniting the flame. You spat on the lit match of your relationship, then tossed it into the ocean. It would never light again.
“Us.”
Seungcheol sucked in a deep breath, a painful one, then looked away. You already knew he was crying even before the tears fell. “I think…” he choked up and couldn’t finish his sentence for a moment, but he held up a hand to tell you he was going to finish it, in a minute after he regained his voice. “I think that’s probably the best thing to do,” he said finally, and he cast his gaze at the ground, and you knew that he was ashamed of his tears when your eyes were still dry. For some reason, the tears you’d felt earlier had retracted, crawled way back into your body and built a solid wall so that they couldn’t escape. “You know,” he croaked, “for multiple reasons. Yeah, it’ll be good for us to just… take a break.”
“To end things,” you corrected him, and you watched his puffy lower lip wobble at your determination to cut the cord.
“I’m scared, (Y/N),” he admitted suddenly, still looking at the floor, still linking your pinky with his, “I’m scared that this love… our love… is all I’ll ever get.”
“What do you mean?” you asked, deciding that it was better to look at the ground as well. Looking at him would make you go back on your finality.
“You’re always going to have love in your life,” he said shakily, “you know, you’re always going to be surrounded by it, just ‘cause you’re a great fucking person. You attract love, you deserve it. You’ll always have it, even… even when this ends.”
You didn’t reply, and he took this as a sign to go on. “But… me? I’m a mean old bastard, and this is probably the best I’m going to get. And don’t get me wrong, you showed me so much, loved me so hard that even if I did find love again, it would probably never measure up.”
“Cheol—”
“Please let me finish.” He licked his lips, and you watched out of the corner of your eye as several tear drops fell from his beautiful eyes and stained the light gray of his pants. “Please.”
“Okay.” You wiggled your pinky a little, and he wiggled it back. You dared to crack a watery smile.
“I’m scared,” he repeated, “because I’m only getting older, and I don’t want to let go of us even though I know I’m holding you back. I’m selfish like that, and you can go ahead and add that to the list of reasons why I’m scared I’ll never find love again. And... I’ve never done this with anyone else. I don’t know if I want to love somebody else.”
You still stayed silent, feeling worse and worse as he opened his heart to you, gore and all, and you willed him to shut the fuck up, because it was selfish of him to make you feel all this guilt. But you supposed, it was also only fair that he let you know how he felt in these last fleeting moments of your first love. “But anyways, I’m done. You don’t have to—to say some dumb shit to comfort me or anything, I just needed to say that.”
“Do you want me to say some dumb shit?”
“I said you don’t have to.”
“But do you want me to?”
“Yes. God, yes, please say some dumb shit and tell me it’ll be okay, even if you’re lying through your teeth.”
You cleared your throat, which had begun to get blocked again as you swallowed your tears, and said, “Choi Seungcheol, you don’t have to be afraid that you’ll never find love again, because you are an amazing fucking human being, and you will be surrounded by love everywhere you go. It follows you like a baby follows its mother, like the tides follow the moon, and the way I will always follow you, no matter how shitty things between us are. Even if you called me all the worst names in the world I would still know that you’re full of so much kindness, and I would step back for just a second to see how much fuckass love you’re surrounded by. It would create a gigantic pink dome around you no matter how far you walked and it would never shrink or disappear, because it’s an endless supply.” You let out a laugh here, one that finally broke the dam and let hot tears flow down your cheeks, as you looked up at Seungcheol and saw how puffy and red his eyes were, and how he let out a little sob at your horrible spiel. “But please, don’t think that you won’t find love again, because you will. And I’ll be here cheering you on through it all.”
The both of you resembled Vernon after an allergic reaction now, with how puffy and fucked up your faces were, and when you brought up that mean comparison it made Seungcheol laugh until he cried some more, and you allowed him to weep into your shoulder, drenching your shirt with snot and spit as he snorted back heaving sobs, and in return he allowed you to do the same to him.
“Thank you,” he hiccupped, voice muffled by your damp shirt, “for loving me all these years.”
“You loving me back for just as long is thanks enough,” you said in a pinched voice, still holding back your crying long enough to get those words out.
As your sobs faded to watery laughs, you didn’t mind the rain for once, willing it to pour on and on as you let yourself melt into Seungcheol’s strong arms one last time, and you didn’t even care that it was the last time. You were terrible at comforting other people, but decent at comforting yourself, and by the time those watery laughs melted into sniffles every few minutes, then a comfortable silence between the two of you, you realized that it would all be okay, eventually, and your heart took solace in knowing that according to Seungcheol, there would never be an absence of love to feed it.
petrichor-han 2022. do not translate, repost, or feed into ai.
please consider reblogging and/or leaving a few kind words if you enjoyed this fic :) tumblr posts revolve around reblogs, and i'd appreciate the gesture!!
PLOT: You have the fattest crush on your co-worker, Lee Heeseung, who has an even BIGGER crush on you. But instead of confessing to each other, you affectionately insult each other via sticky notes. Will one of you spill the beans or has someone gotta do it for you?
PAIRING: Lee Heeseung x Gender Neutral reader
GENRE: office!au, friends to lovers, mutual idiotic pining, tiny angst, comedy, major fluff
WARNINGS: curse words, reader feels a little insecure about feelings.
WORD COUNT: 1.9k words.
A/N: Personally one of my favourite fics I've written. It's also sort of based on how my partner and I confessed to each other. YES, it's cringey BUT IT'S CUTE AS HELL. 🧡
Another day, another disgustingly cute note from your co-worker that you may or may not have the biggest crush on. Who are you kidding, of course you have the biggest crush on him. It's Lee freaking Heeseung for goodness sake. Aside from the fact that he is compassionate and highly considerate of others, he is so freaking gorgeous. That smile of his makes your knees go weak. Makes your heart beat a little bit faster. Let's just say when Heeseung is near you, you can't string a fucking sentence together. It's like you don't know which word in a sentence goes where. You're too busy being enchanted by him and that goddamn smile of his.
You're not entirely sure how you both started sending notes to each other. You assume it was because one of you needed something, and it just went on from there. You'd come into work at 8:30am in the morning with your cup of Starbucks coffee in your hand, and thereupon on your computer screen; a sticky note. Usually an insult, sometimes a cute message. There's no in-between. It was either one of you calling the other an idiot, affectionately of course. Or it would be a cute "Have a nice day" message with a badly drawn heart, especially from his side.
Honestly, if you were looking at these interactions from the outside, you'd be thinking, "Yeah, they're totally into each other," but since you're not, and this is your reality, that's not what you're thinking at all. This is a one-sided crush, on your part, at least. And it's more than likely just a flirty thing on Heeseung's side. I mean, why would Lee Heeseung even like you like that? Or even look at you in that way? You're just... a simple person. You like your books, you could spend an entire day in a museum. You simply wake up, go to work, come home to lazy around on the sofa and watch Netflix, cuddle the cats and go to sleep. You're not that interesting. So, for your sake, let's just enjoy whatever this is and when it ends, you can move on.
You removed the pink sticky note which read "You're an adorable idiot," in a badly written cursive font with an added wonky drawn heart next to it. And then at the bottom of the note, "Just kidding, you're just adorable." Curse you Lee Heeseung. You hope to GOD nobody can see the blush creeping up on your cheeks as you look around the office floor. Oh no. And there he is. You've clocked him just at the right moment when he's walking back to his desk, running his fingers through his hair, and then proceeding to mess you up by rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. You're very much enjoying what you're seeing until a figure gets in your way, "Gooooood morning, y/n."
"Sim Jaeyun! You're ruining my view." Jake shakes his head, "You're down so bad for him, y/n. As your best friend, it's my duty to tell you that it's embarrassing."
"Thanks for your support in my daily suffering, Jake. It's highly appreciated." You shoot him a glare, taking a small sip of your coffee.
"My pleasure, y/n. Hey, did you watch that movie I told you about?" Ah yes, Jake and his mild obsession with poorly acted horror movies. Though his recent recommendation wasn't as bad as you thought it was going to be. It was pretty decent.
"You know what, it was actually pretty good. For once your recommendation of a movie had me enjoying every second. I love it."
"Oh yes! Great, then you should watch the sequels." You can see Jake's face light up when he's excited about you enjoying the movie he recommended to you, "There's six."
"Six sequels? You're pushing your luck now, Sim Jaeyun. I might watch the second but after that, I'll give it a pass. It's been proven that sequels are usually a waste of time."
"Shut up and confess to Heeseung."
Point.
Taken.
You definitely shouldn't confess to Heeseung though. Your rejection would surely make things awkward for not just the both of you but the entirety of the office and that's the last thing you want. You'll make sure you have another job lined up for that. So when the rejection happens, you can hand in your notice and you're gone. Easy peasy. No awkwardness. Gone.
As you press "send" on the last email before your shift ends, you perform a few last-minute tasks. Your eye catches the note that Heeseung had left for you this morning and you remembered you completely forgot to write one back. So, you grab a pen and a sticky note and start writing.
With five minutes to go until your shift is over, you hastily make your way to the restroom but not before placing your written sticky note on Heeseung's keyboard as his attention is fixated on the sunset outside. He only notices your presence when he spots your reflection in the window. As he turns to look at you, you're already a few feet away from him and have disappeared into the restroom to scream internally.
Your note reads, "It's been a long day and I'm sorry I haven't written back sooner. But I hope your day was as lovely as you are." With a badly drawn heart to match the ones that he gives you. His heart beats a little faster, as his cheeks turn bright red. The effect you have on him, from just a simple note like this, is insane. He really just thinks you're the cutest person to ever walk the earth. You're so kind to everyone you meet. Always polite. You go the extra mile for anyone who needs it. He really does have the biggest crush on you.
Honestly, the both of you need to grow a pair and confess. It's painful for your coworkers watching the two of you turn into a giant mess over the other's words. One of you just needs to confess. Like now.
Either that or Heeseung's friend, Jay, will do it for you. As you exit the restroom, Jay takes matters into his own hands, and spills all, "Oh my god, will you and y/n just tell each other how you feel? It's painful watching the both of you stumble over your shit in front of the other and blush literally every fucking second. You like each other. Tell them." His outburst captures your attention along with pretty much the rest of the office. With heads nodding in agreement and whispers of "they're so into each other", you lock eyes with Heeseung.
"Well, cat's out of the bag now, I guess." Heeseung rises from his chair, growing increasingly upset and shooting Jay a disapproving look for spilling his confession to you. You're standing frozen in the middle of the floor, eyes still locked on Heeseung. The confession replaying in your mind. Heeseung's eyes find yours again, and he pauses when he sees the small smile on your face. Is this confirmation that you like him too?
Of course, he smiles back at you. And you lean on the filing cabinet next to you for support because oh my god, there are so many emotions to feel all at once. Lee Heeseung SMILED at you, that gorgeous smile and it was all for you. Hello? How are you not dead. Better than that, you have your proof that he is into you, too. Hold on a minute, Lee Heeseung is into... YOU?
Oh my god, he's walking over to you.
Breathe, y/n.
Breathe.
"Hi, y/n. As you might have guessed from Jay's rudeness, I kinda like you?"
"What do you mean, kinda? You're crushing on y/n so bad you have all of the notes they've written to you stuck to your fridge at home. Don't give us that kinda bullshit. I won't have it." As Jay continues exposing Heeseung, you can't help but giggle a little. You find it really cute that he keeps all of your notes, just like you've kept his. Also stuck to your fridge. His affectionate insults and his kind words bring a smile to your face whenever you re-read them. Especially if you've had a bad day.
"Okay, I like you a lot, y/n. I think that's now painfully obvious. And judging by Jay's confession and your reaction, I'm hoping you feel the same way?"
Heeseung can feel his body temperature increase as you stare into his eyes. He can feel the entire office just disappear, he only sees you and he just wants to stare lovingly at you forever. You're just so damn fucking cute.
"I also like you, too. Though before Jake decides to intervene and expose me too, I also have your notes stuck to my fridge."
"That's really cute, you're really cute." There goes you blushing in front of Heeseung, "Now you're blushing, that's even cuter."
"Heeseung, now you're exposing me." He laughs at you, holds his hands up and apologises. Though you don't mind it. Not when he's got that smile on his face again. That smile will literally be the death of you.
"If you're free after work, do you want to grab a bite to eat and see a movie or something?" He asks you. His palms are sweaty, he's so nervous. He's almost falling over his words.
"I'd like that a lot." Seriously if you two weren't still standing in work, in front of everyone, he would be freaking out. His crush likes him back. You like him back. He's on cloud nine right now.
You, on the other hand, are on the verge of melting into a puddle on the floor. That crush you've had for months is reciprocated. Better yet, he's an even bigger mess than you are. You'll be keeping in mind later to kiss that pretty smile of his at the end of the night.
As you gather up your things, you hear Jake exhale, clasping his hands together, "This was straight out of a K-Drama."
"Jake, my life is not entertainment to you." You shove him gently that he almost trips over his own shoes.
"It was. Now it's like the happy ending to a K-Drama. You like Heeseung. He likes you. You're going out on a date tonight and when you get home, you're going to call me about it and gush about him for three hours."
"It's hardly a date. I'm not even dressed for a date. I'm still in my office attire."
"I don't think Heeseung cares about that, besides you look great. And I doubt you care about what Heeseung wears either. You'll enjoy each other's company, no matter what." Speaking of Heeseung, it doesn't take long for him to appear by your side. Jake bids you both a farewell and Heeseung holds his hand out to you, "Ready to go?"
You nod, and as your fingers intertwine with his, your hand fits perfectly in his. Like two puzzle pieces fitting perfectly together.
Sports Au, Nascar Au, Illegal Street racer Au, Journalist Au, Strangers to Lovers
Genre:Fluff, seriously don't know how i managed to not even add an ounce of angst
Pairing: NascarDriver!Xu Minghao x Journalist!Reader
Wordcount: 9.2k
Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of food, illegal street racing, breaking the law, possibly wrong nascar termiology
Rating: PG-13 for swearing and breaking the law lmao
A/n: This is for the Sport Au Collab hosted by @gyukult! Thank you so much Gyu for letting me apart of this amazing collab. I made some wonderful friends and thank you to those who helped me figure out plot and which banner was better. You guys are the best! I also want to thank @sungbeam for helping me with the outline, without you I would seriously still be struggling where to go with this! I would also like to thank @heeracha for letting me use her all eyes on me line! I also hope you don't mind the awkward pov switches. I tried to space out the places when I would switch them. Also, some of the parts are purely self induldge and Hao is a bit oc...
Engines rev as they wait for the chequered flag to wave signalling the start of the race. Loud music blasted from the several cars, all of different types, but all doing the same thing…making the person behind the wheel hellbent on winning the race. One racer stood out amongst the crowd, She was notorious for winning and was one of the fastest racers Seoul has seen in years. She however, could care less about winning because she just wanted to feel the adrenaline course through her veins as she sped through the streets, she just happened to win every single time. This time was no different. She sped through the streets, turning tight corners, zooming past red lights. She just loves the thrill of racing.
You quickly looked over your outfit in the mirror in front of you, making sure it is deemed appropriate for a journalist interview. This was it. You were finally going to interview the people you’ve been dreaming of meeting. You gave yourself another look in the mirror before confidently nodding to yourself and grabbed your keys off the table, heading out the door with a confident walk.
Once you looked at the building in front of you, you felt your previous confidence leave your body. You’ve never felt so intimidated by a building before until now. But, you had to present yourself with confidence, so you took a deep breath and let your anxiety release as you breathed out. You let your false confidence return to you as you walked towards the arena with a notepad and pen in your hands. You flashed the security guards your press pass and walked through the doors. You could hear the sounds of engines roaring as you walked to the pit stops in hopes of catching one of the racers . Cars would zoom past you and you could feel the gush of cold air fly past you just as the cars did.
You let a grin take over my face as you spotted the very racer you were hoping to be able to interview. He was just getting out of his car as you made your way towards him, as his best friend sauntered over to him with a big grin stretched across his face. The very racer you were making your way over to, notices you walking towards him and cocks his head in confusion.
He watched as she made her way over to him. There was something fascinating about her, the way she carried herself. Full of confidence and intimidation, but the man did not feel an ounce of fear or nervousness as she continued to make her way towards him. No, instead it made him curious about her. He wanted to know…No, he needed to know more about her. He was compelled to walk over to her. To start a conversation, to talk to her. It was like he was under a spell or some magnetic force that pulled him towards her. He couldn’t even hear a word his best friend was saying. Not even when she was right in front of him, looking directly into his eyes. He only started to pay attention when she opened her mouth and started to talk to him.
“Hi! I’m Y/n, I work for the Daily Carat. I’m a journalist there and I was asked to come interview you and the upcoming Indy 500. Are you able to answer questions right now or do you need to get back to practising, I don’t mind coming back another time or scheduling an interview,” you say, trying to be confident with my words.
“No worries, I’m available to talk now. Is it me you want to interview or Seungcheol,” Minghao asks with a slight smile on his face.
“Well, both if you don’t mind. I originally came here to interview you, but I don’t mind interviewing The Quickest Lane Switcher either,” I smirk looking over at Seungcheol.
“Yeah, yeah. Of course you would call me that,” He rolls his eyes, but there’s mischievous glint in them.
“Do you two know each other,” Minghao asks, confusion written over his face.
“Yeah, just a bit. I’ve run into him a few times,” I reply, “Anyways, let’s get on with the interview. You guys are probably very busy with the race only being next month.”
“Right, so what do you want to know,” Minghao sits on the hood of his car.
You pull out your notepad and look over the questions you had previously prepared beforehand. “Well, I want to know how you feel about being a third time winning racer going for his fourth win. It must be pressuring for you to have to live up to big expectations. Especially with everyone expecting you to win. How do you try to not let the pressure get to you and push forward?”
“Yeah, there is a lot of pressure with people trying to constantly expect me to win for the fourth time. I feel like I’d disappoint them if I didn’t strive to always win because it’s just expected of me. I try to not let it get to me and use it as motivation. I want to be able to surpass everyone’s expectations and go fast each time. I want to surprise people,” Minghao looked away from me, jaw clenched in frustration. Something must be bothering him.
You write down key notes about what Minghao has said and move onto the next question, ‘Seungcheol, what about you? I know you might not be going for your fourth win, but going for a third one is still a big deal. Is there a lot of pressure around it? Especially, since this time you have to go up against your best friend. Are you planning on taking it easy on him,” you let a teasing smirk play on your lips at the last comment.
“Haha very funny, you think you’re very funny because you beat me. Don’t get so cocky, I’ll win next time,” he rolls his eyes with a cocky smirk.
“Yeah yeah, whatever you say. Now answer the questions Choi,” You rest your hands on your hips, fully confident in yourself. Your anxiety has completely left and you feel completely in my element.
“Fine, Lee. I would say there is and there isn’t a lot of pressure. I think I mostly put the pressure on myself because much like Minghao, I want to surpass people’s expectations of me. I don’t want to be seen as only one thing. I want to be able to surprise people with a variety of skills. And no, I’m not going to go easy on Minghao just because he’s my best friend.”
You continue asking them questions and they continue answering them, but every once in a while you couldn’t help but look over at the cars driving by. The way that they would speed past you was thrilling. You couldn’t help but let a small grin take over your face whenever they would drive past.
Minghao noticed the way her eyes would gleam whenever they drove past them. He was growing even more curious about her. He wanted to know her secret. He wanted to know what she loved about racing and why she loved watching people race. He was also rather curious to know how she knew Seungcheol and what the hell they were talking about. He was so enthralled by her and the way she spoke that he failed to realise that the interview was over and that she was walking away from them now. He couldn’t help but wonder if he would see her ever again as he watched her figure leave the arena. Damn it, he should’ve asked for her number before she left.
Seungcheol whacks him on the back of the head, “Dude, you’re staring, she’s not coming back. Who knew Xu Minghao would be the type of guy who would fall in love at first sight.”
“I’m not in love with her,” Minghao replies, rubbing the back of his head.
“Oh yeah, definitely not. I’m also not an illegal street racer,” Seungcheol rolls his eyes at the obliviousness of his friend.
“Whatever, I’m just curious about her. I’ve never met anyone quite like her before. I just…I don’t know how to explain it, but she has the magnetic aura about her that pulls me to her.”
“That’s the first step, then boom next thing you know you’re in love getting married and having kids and-”
“Choi Seungcheol.”
“Sorry man. I was just trying to make a point. But, speaking of Illegal street racing. There’s another race tonight. You should come with me. I’ll even drive you there,” Seungcheol says, hoping to convince Minghao to finally go.
“I don’t know Cheol. You know how I feel about those races. I’ll have to think about it.”
“C’mon man. It’ll be fun, I promise. How about this, if you don’t have fun or enjoy it, I’ll drive you home immediately no questions asked. I will never ask you to attend another race again.”
“Why do you want me to go to this race so bad?”
“Well, I’ll be racing in one of the events tonight plus I think it might surprise you about who else will be there tonight.”
“Who else?”
“Come and you’ll find out. Don’t want to ruin the surprise.”
“Fine. One race and that’s it.”
Evening finally rolled around and Minghao couldn’t believe how many people showed up to an illegal street race. He would think that there were famous people here with the amount of people that showed. Well, not counting himself and Cheol because they were technically celebrities. “Seungcheol, what’s up with all of these people? You would think it would be a bit more discreet…Is there some sort of celebrity coming to the race or something,” Minghao asks, eyes widening as he sees even more people join the neverending crowd.
“Hush! Don’t call me that here, call me S.coups. People don’t know me as that here, can’t let them know I’m a famous racer, otherwise they would think that I’m cheating, they don’t take that shit lightly either,” Seungcheol, quickly hushes his friend.
“Alright, Alright. Calm down. You didn’t answer my question nor did you tell me that before we arrived here,” Minghao couldn’t help but roll his eyes at Seungcheol’s stupidity.
“Oh, yeah. Sorry,” He rubs the back of his neck, “Well, somewhat famous people. At least what we consider famous in the illegal street race community. First, there’s DK, but you know him as Seokmin, yes a lot of nascar racers do illegal street racing. Then there’s Woozi, he’s known for his speeding tricks. He’ll speed up and pass someone just to slow down right when they are behind him. It pisses everyone off when he does it, but it’s a brilliant way to always stay in first. Lastly, the one even more famous than you and I, Zero Light. She always wins because no one seems to be able to beat her. She also happens to be DK’s sister so she grew up behind the wheel, racing is in her blood. It’s my dream to be able to go against her in a one on one and win. Ah, here she comes, that’s her car.” As Seungcheol was talking, a car sped down the street. It was jet black and had white racing stripes.It was the coolest car Minghao has ever seen, but the comment about Seungcheol wanting to win against her made him confused. Because Seungcheol was a literal nascar driver, she can’t possibly be that good, right?
Once everyone noticed the car, they surrounded the car, and started to whoop and holler. Two people got out of the car and because everyone was surrounding them, Minghao couldn’t make out their faces. But he could definitely feel the change in the atmosphere when they showed up. Before everything was chill and people were just vibing, but now people are buzzing with excitement.
“Hey! Zero Light, over here! I have someone I want you to meet. Bring DK with you,” Seungcheol shouts, waving his arms hoping to get their attention, which it somehow does.
They start weaving their way through the crowd to him and Seungcheol. And Minghao couldn’t believe who was in front of his eyes, “Y/n? What are you doing here?”
Her lips curved up to a smirk and he swears he’s never seen anything more attractive than the confidence he could feel surrounding her, “Ah, Minghao! I see S.coups has finally convinced you to come to one of these. And please, refer to me as Zero Light. Can’t let anyone know my real name in case the cops catch someone from one of these races. We should give you a nickname in case too. Do you have a nickname someone calls you that you like?”
“Uhm…”
“How about The8, for his love of infinite speed,” Seungcheol pipes in, “Also, where’s Woozi? Isn’t he supposed to be racing tonight?”
“I think it’s perfect,” you say, “Yeah, he’s on his way. He said he should be here in a couple of minutes. We won’t start the race without him anyways. What’s a good race when Woozi isn’t there.”
“I like it,” Minghao replies, a confident smirk on his pretty lips, “Whose Woozi? S.coups mentioned him before, and said he was some sort of illegal street racing celebrity.”
“Cool. Woozi’s my best friend. Yeah, he’s well known amongst the community here in Seoul, not quite sure if he’s as well known outside of it as we mostly do our races here. Oh, right. This is my brother DK. You probably recognize him, but because of him I’ve been able to see every single race of yours. Gotta say, I’m quite the fan. S.coups also talks quite a bit about you and wanted you to come to one of these. Glad you finally decided to come.”
“Really? Every single one? And you talk about me, they better be good things or I’ll-”
“Haha. Don’t worry, he only says the best things. Well, maybe a few embarrassing stories here and there, but that’s what friends are for. They gotta embarrass you sometimes and you them otherwise, are you true friends?”
“I guess you do make a good point.”
“Oh, Zero Light. I wanted to ask you if we could hold a one vs one tomorrow night. I don’t think there’s any scheduled illegal races for next week,” Seungcheol asks, butting into the conversation.
“You really want to lose that bad, huh?”
“I don’t think I’ll lose. I am a nascar driver after all,” Seungcheol smirks, confidence blooming in his chest.
“Although that may be true, how many times have you lost to me? I mean the same goes for DK here. He’s my brother so he would hate to lose to me at something he does for his career,” you rest your hands on your hip, cocking your head with a mock.
“Yeah, yeah whatever. What do you say? You in?”
“Sure, why not. I could use a break from all the tough competitors,” you smirk as Seungcheol scowls.
“Oh fuck off will you. Anyways, I can’t wait to finally win against you and rub it in.”
“Confident are we? Speaking of racing, where the fuck is Woozi. He said he’d be here soon, we can’t wait all night for him.”
Soon enough another jet black car comes barrelling down the street and instead of white racing stripes, it has a single red stripe down the centre of the car. When everyone notices that car, they start shouting yet again and the already buzzing energy gets even higher as someone new makes their appearance.
“Ah, Woozi’s here. Perfect timing as always,” you roll your eyes and look over at the car that’s currently parking.
“That’s Woozi? I’m not going to lie..I expected him to be a lot more-”
“Intimidating? Taller? He’s very intimidating when you first meet him, but once he warms up to you, he’ll be someone you never forget,” you say, looking over at the short male with a smile on his face as he greets others while he makes his way towards us.
“Hey guys! Who's the newbie? I swear I’ve seen you before, are you a model or something,” Woozi asks, looking up at Minghao.
“That’s The8,” you lean closer to Jihoon’s ear, “His name is actually Minghao and he’s a nascar racer. He’s S.coups best friend and has raced against DK before.”
“Ohhhh. Wow, I’ve heard so much about you from Zero-” Woozi starts to say until I elbow him before he says too much.”
“That’s enough out of you. We’ve got a race to start now that your ass has finally arrived,” you roll your eyes.
“Oh, it’s starting now? Good luck Zero Light! You too Woozi and S.coups,” Minghao says, smiling with sincerity.
“Baby, I don’t need luck,” you wink and leave a flustered Minghao behind as you head back to your car.
“I do, thanks The8,” Woozi says, “Especially if I’m going up against her.”
Minghao couldn’t even respond to Woozi because he was so caught up in his thoughts of her. His heart sped up just like the very cars he was surrounded by. Maybe Seungcheol was right. Maybe he did fall in love at first. “Come on lover boy, quite staring at my sister. You’re not going to want to miss this,” He lets Dk pull him somewhere they can see the race and just ignores the comment he made because again, it might very well be true.
Engines revved as they waited for the chequered flag to wave. Loud music blasted from all the cars, pumping up both the racers and the viewers. Minghao could hear Villain blasting from her car. He was excited to see how she would race. Since he’s never been to one of these, he’s not quite sure how they work. But he’s pretty sure you aren’t supposed to wait for everyone to speed off while you wait behind. Except that’s exactly what she did. She stood at the start line for five seconds before she finally sped off.
You could feel the bass of the song thrum against you as it blasted through the speakers. You waited for about five seconds before you decided that it was long enough for everyone to get a good distance from the start line. You waited so that you could feel the real adrenaline race through your veins as you raced through the streets desperately trying to catch up. But for you, it was nothing.
You zipped through the streets, fast as the speed of sound. You could hear the tires screech against the asphalt every time you took a tight turn left. You drove up next to a jet black car with a red racing stripe and you knew exactly who you just caught up to.. you looked to your left and saw Jihoon flip you off and grinned from ear to ear. You could hear his laughter ring through my ears as you finally drove past him, making me come in first.
Watching her drive the way she did ignited something in Minghao, something he hasn’t felt in a while. He wanted…he craved to know what it felt like to drive the way she does. He wanted to be both the passenger and driver. He wanted to feel the thrill she felt. And he could tell she loved the adrenaline by how excited and how her smile beamed into the night as she celebrated her new victory.
You climbed out of the car. A grin present on your lips as you bask in the glory of your win. Minghao pulled you into a tight hug, congratulating you on the win. Woozi even came over and joined the crowd to congratulate you, though he did tease you and tried to say that you cheated. You could still feel the adrenaline pump through your veins. There was nothing more thrilling than racing down the street reaching new speeds.
The glory and excitement was cut short as soon as you and everyone else heard sirens race through the streets desperate to find you and where everyone was hiding. Everyone quickly scrambled to get out of there before the cops showed up. Everyone was so panicked about getting caught that Seungcheol forgot to grab Minghao. DK and Woozi must've sped off together because they were nowhere to be found in the vicinity.
Minghao still hadn't registered what was happening even when you pulled up next to him furiously trying to get him into the car. "Hao, fuck. Come on get in the fucking car, we don't have time for you to look like a cute lost puppy!"
"What? What's going on Y/n-" you didn't let him finish his sentence and opened the passenger side and yanked him in the car. You see flashing red and blue light's behind youand siren's blaring, "FUCK!"
You hurriedly shift your car into gear and speed down the street. Cops seemed to catch on that you were one of the racers and started to follow you, "Fuck, fuck. Okay, Hao...We are currently getting chased by cops, so I'm going to need you to duck down, so they don't see you. Can't have you going to jail."
Minghao listen's instantly and ducks down, hiding himself from the view of cops. You grip your steering wheel so tight that your knuckles start to turn white. You keep taking several left and right turns to throw the cops off your track but it doesn't last long enough.
You quickly turn left into an alley. Fortunately, the cops were far enough back that they didn't seem to notice the sharp turn, so you quickly turned off the car and ducked down to remain hidden. You look over at Minghao to gauge his reaction. To your surprise, he looked like he was having the time of his life. He let out an elated laugh and you couldn’t help but start laughing alongside him. “I think we’re safe now. I don’t hear the siren’s nor do I see flashing lights. I’ll take you home, where do you live,” you sat up in your seat and pulled out of the alley and drove Minghao home.
You walk up to Minghao and tap him on the shoulder, “Hey. My boss didn’t think we got enough questions yesterday, so I’m back again. Is Cheol not here today? Also, if you aren’t free right now, I can come back another time, schedule a lunch with you if need be.”
“No! No. It’s fine. I have time now. Yeah, Seungcheol is still a bit shaken up from last night, so he wants to take the day off from practising, especially since he has the race against you tonight,”Minghao sits on the hood of his car, stuffing his hands in his pockets.
“Ah, typical Cheol,” you reply playfully, “Anyways, some fans want to know how you got into racing in the first place. I’m not going to lie, I’m also curious as to how you got into the whole nascar racing scene as well.”
“Well, Seungcheol would be the reason. He’s my best friend and he’s been doing illegal street racing since we were teenagers. I went only once to one of those and it was an amazing experience. I know I said I haven’t gone to one before, that is mostly true. I haven’t been to one since that one because after that I started to do more research about Nascar racing and just fell in love with everything. The way that there is no limit to how fast you can go. What about you?”
“Huh? What do you mean,” you look up from your notepad and give him a quizzical look.
“What do you love about racing? Why don’t you become a Nascar racer instead of doing illegal ones?”
“Hey, I’m the one supposed to be asking the questions, not you. You can’t take my job like that,” you tease, trying to fight off the embarrassment.
“Awh, please? I won’t ask anymore questions. I’m just curious to know more about you,”Minghao takes his hands out of his pockets and folds them over his chest.
“I was just teasing you,” you sat next to him on the hood of his car. ”Jihoon actually got me into it. That’s Woozi’s real name, don’t tell him I told you,” you point your pen at him and he puts his hands up in surrender, “You would think it was my brother, but it wasn’t. He was a Nascar racer and sure that was cool too, but there were too many rules, plus tell me how many women Nascar drivers you see. But anyways, much like you. Jihoon was an illegal street racer as a teenager too and at first I was terrified of being at one of those races. Then he convinced me to and instead of being on the side lines, I was in the car with him. I got to feel the air whip through the car as we went faster and faster. I was so scared that we were going to crash any time we took a tight corner. However, it was the most fun I’ve ever had and I just loved the rush of adrenaline.”
“Wow…that’s amazing,” he truly looked like he was in awe of what I told him. you felt extremely touched that he wanted to learn more about you. You also felt your heart pick up the pace.
“I guess..Anyways, are you ready for the Nascar race next month?”
“Yeah, I guess I’m excited,” Minghao lets out a breathy sigh and looks a bit dejected.
“Is everything okay? You can talk to me if something’s bothering you…”
“No, I’m fine! Don’t worry. Are you excited for the race against Seungcheol?”
“I mean, it’s Cheol. How excited can one be? I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” you say when you notice the look he was giving me. “Yeah, I’m excited. I'd be even more excited if I were to know whether or not you would be making an appearance there.”
“Honestly? I love being a Nascar driver and being able to go fast. But when we were speeding away from the cops? What I felt then? That was something entirely different. The thrill and rush of getting caught was so exhilarating. I want to experience it again. Seungcheol didn't ask me to go, so I wouldn’t know where it was being held and-”
“I could take you,” you quickly chime in.
“You want to take me?”
“Yeah! It would be fun to have a passenger, someone that isn’t my brother or Jihoon,” I let out a chuckle, causing Minghao to smile.
“They, hell yeah!”
“Cool! What time should I pick you up?”
“I’ll give you my number and you can text me a time you think would be good.”
Score! “Cool, I’ll text you then. I’ve got to go, but I’ll see you tonight. Bye Hao!”
“Bye…”
The ride to the new area, where the race will be held, was a silent one. Not an uncomfortable or suffocating silence, but rather one that you basked in. You felt so comfortable around Minghao and you’ve only known him for two days. It’s crazy to think about how you’ve gotten close over the span of 48 hours, but you guess if you are getting chased and fleeing from the cops, it does that. Not that I’m complaining. It was somewhat a magical night, one that you will commit to memory forever. You wonder if he would do the same.
You pulled into the lot and everyone crowded around your car once they noticed you had arrived. You told Minghao to stay in the car until you gestured for him to get out. You spotted Seokmin, Jihoon, and Seungcheol walking towards your car, so you waved for Minghao to get out of the car. Everyone gasped in surprise when they saw Minghao get out of the car, you even noticed your friends making confused faces, but you ignored them.
“Hey S.coups. Ready to lose,” you ask, taunting him.
“I don’t think so. Tonight is the night I finally beat you,” Seungcheol smirks.
“You think? Want to put a bet on it?”
“Sure. Loser buys dinner?”
“How about dinner for the entire group, your friends and mine?”
“Deal. But before we start the race, I want to know why you guys arrived together?”
“Yeah, I’m also curious. Last I checked, you only ever brought us two,” Seokmin points to him and Jihoon, “Are you guys a thing?”
“What? No,” both Minghao and you shouted together, causing some onlookers to stare.
“Uhm no. I asked if Minghao was coming and he said that he wanted to but you didn’t invite him so I did. I took your personal cheerleader, jealous?”
“Well, I thought after last night he wouldn’t want to come to one of these things again. Or maybe he didn’t come to see me race, but rather someone else,” Seungcheol looks over at Minghao, hinting at something.
“Who? It’s only us racing tonight,” you ask obliviously.
Seungcheol rolls his eyes at your response which confuses you more, “No one, no one. Speaking of races, Minghao, are you prepared for the race next month? I still feel like I haven’t gotten enough practise in and I’m doing these illegal street races. I can’t imagine what it would be like for you.”
“I’d rather not talk about it right now. You have a race to lose,” Minghao quips
Seungcheol looks absolutely baffled to the point where you want to take a picture to laugh at in the future, “Wow. I thought you were MY best friend…”
“I am. Also try not to get too angry when I sit with her in her car,” Minghao starts walking backwards towards my car.
“Wait, what? I thought you would’ve wanted to ride with Seungcheol,” you replied.
“And be on the losing team? Nah, plus after the experience from last night, I want to experience that again with you,” Minghao gives your a toothy smile, that just maybe, just maybe makes your heart flutter a little.
“Suit yourself,” Seungcheol walks past my car to his, not before passing by Minghao whispering something in his ear.
You could hear music blasting from Seungcheol’s car as he revved the engine. The grip on your steering wheel tightened. You could feel the adrenaline start its course through your veins. You took a deep breath in and let it consume you. You felt a hand on yours, took it off the steering wheel and intertwined it with another. You look over and see Minghao’s hand interlaced with yours. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, you were about to question it, but Minghao squeezed your hand in reassurance. Silently, he was cheering you on. Your heart definitely did flips that time. The chequered flag waved, but you were too caught up in Minghao to notice, that was until he released his hand from yours and pointed. Oh fuck…you were going to have a hard time explaining this one.
It took everything in Minghao to hold back his laughter. He didn’t want to throw her off her game. But as soon as she noticed she went flying down the road. Instinctively, he grabbed the handle and held onto it for dear life. He could tell that as soon as he did that, that Y/n was trying to hold back her giggles. As the car continues to pick up speed, Minghao starts to let loose a bit. He lets go of the handle and rolls down the window to truly feel air whip through his hair. He takes a deep breath in and truly tries to feel how she’s currently feeling. He pictures himself behind the wheel instead of her. He breathes in every sight, feels every turn, and can taste victory around the corner. Well, he could. That was until Seungcheol came speeding down the street, fast as lightning. Seungcheol quickly took the spot as first place. Minghao looked over at Y/n and noticed the panicked look on her face. This must not happen very often. Minghao did the first thing he could think of that would ground her. He put his hand on her arm, causing her to look over at him. Her eyes widen in surprise as she continues to look forward to the road ahead of her. She took one of her hands off the steering wheel and interlaced it with Minghao’s. He felt his heart speed up as the car began to speed up. They both secretly conveyed their thoughts and feelings to each other without murmuring a word. They could tell just by how someone would squeeze their hand. Minghao was cheering on and motivating her without having to say a word because all she had to do was look over at him and see the emotions in his eyes.
To celebrate your win with Minghao, the both of you went to a fast food place to grab a bite to eat. “Hey,” you hear in a soft voice and look up from your burger to see Minghao staring at you with a curious gaze. You blink in confusion. “Yeah? You need something?”
“I was wondering if you knew a place where we could chill out for a bit. I don’t really want to go home yet, you know?”
“Yeah, I do. I’ll take you there after we finish eating. Is that good with you? If not, I can bring our food with us.”
“I don’t mind waiting for you.”
You park the car on the grassy hill away from city life. You stepped out of the car and let the cold breeze fill your lungs as you breathed in the fresh air. Minghao also stepped out of the car and took in the surroundings around him. You could see a soft smile greet his lips., causing you to smile at his contentment. You sit on the hood of your car and put your hands behind your head as you lay down to look at the stars above. You feel the car shift in weight as Minghao lays next to you. You look over and see him already looking at you. You take one of your hands from underneath your head and innerlace them with his. At this point, when your hand isn’t in his, it feels strange. Like a sense of lostness. Your hand feels like it belongs in his. You feel at home when you're with him. you can’t help wondering if he feels the same as you do.
“Why didn’t you want to go home? Is there something bothering you,” your voice is soft and not above a whisper. You continue observing his face as he looks away from you and towards the city in front, oblivious to love blossoming in the air.
Minghao lets out a deep sigh, “there’s a reason I didn’t really want to talk about the race. I’m not all that happy racing anymore. It’s kind of become a burden to me instead of a fun career. I don’t really feel the same passion and energy that I used to feel. I think it’s because people nowadays only care about winning and will do whatever it takes to win, even if that means cheating. I’m actually thinking this will be my final season as a Nascar racer.”
You sat up in shock, “What? Really?”
He nods his head, “I haven’t made a final decision yet, but it’s something I’ve been thinking of. My passion for racing is dwindling everytime I go to the race track to practise for my upcoming race.”
“What if I help you get your passion and love back for racing? I mean these past two days, I’ve seen you smiling and you look so light and free than I’ve seen you in your past races. What if I help you get your love back? You can maybe try illegal street racing and if you don’t want to physically be in the driver's seat, you can sit next to me. I really really want to help you. Maybe even use this as practice for the Indy race instead of actually practising. Get away from the race track and the rules for a bit.”
“Yeah…Okay. That sounds like a good idea. Let’s do it,” Minghao warmly smiles towards you and your stomach does somersaults.
It’s been two weeks since you had that talk with Minghao. You’ve been going to illegal races almost every day, minus a few breaks here and there. But it’s sort of become a tradition that after every illegal race, you would go grab some greasy food and go up on the hill away from the city. Some of those nights were the best nights of your life. You would just sit and talk about anything and everything that came to mind. Those nights were your favourite because you get to listen to him talk about his life.
Tonight was no different. You guys were chilling on the hood of your car staring at the stars talking about life. “Y/n,” he quietly speaks up.
“Yes Hao?”
“I think I’m ready.”
“Ready for what?”
“I want to race in an illegal street race,” he looks over at you, eyes full of anxiety.
“Are you sure,” you ask and he nods his head, “Well, why don’t we make an announcement at tomorrow night’s race? Hell you can even race it! I’ll let you take my spot for tomorrow night’s race!”
“Are you sure you don’t want to race one last race?”
“Nah, I’m fine. I mean I can always join you in the car if you are that worried I would get bored,”
“What? I wasn’t worried, I just didn’t want your fans to get mad that you aren’t racing.”
“I could use a break. They’ve seen me win enough times. So, don’t worry about them.”
The evening rolled in faster than you thought it would. You could feel the excitement and adrenaline radiating off of Minghao as he sat next to you on your way to the illegal street race. It was his debut night as an illegal street racer, so to see him not anxious in the least bit surprised you to an extent. He was a nascar racer after all, but you think he would be a little bit nervous about racing in an actual street race where he could potentially go to jail for. But no, you could see the confident smirk and glint in his eyes.
You arrived at the parking lot where others were currently parked and waiting for you to arrive. The spectator’s and your friends surrounded your car as you parked, whooping and hollering as soon as they saw you exit, but their cheers grew when Minghao stepped out. Minghao walked over to your friend group while you thought now was a good time to announce Minghao’s debut because everyone was all fired up by his arrival. But first you had to get their attention.
“ALL EYES ON ME,” you shout, cupping your hands around your mouth to make your voice louder.
“ALL EYES ON YOU,” everyone shouts in return except there’s a faint voice yelling, “my eyes are always on you.” You could’ve swore it was Minghao saying that but why would he.
“Alright, now that I have everyone’s attention. I have a few announcements about tonight’s race. I know some of you might be a little disappointed with some of the news I’m going to share, but I don’t care,” you playfully tease, hands on your hips and a growing smirk on your lips.
“The first announcement is that tonight, I am not racing.” You could hear a series of groans come out of people’s mouths. You also noticed Jihoon and Seokmin furrow their eyebrows in confusion, meanwhile Seungcheol is raising an eyebrow towards Minghao, but he chooses to ignore him. “I know, I know. You’re all mad and upset because you took the time out of your night to come and see me. I appreciate it, I really do, but I’m going to be taking a break from racing for a bit, Not for too long, but a small break, like around a week.”
If that didn’t confuse everyone then what you’re about to say is going to definitely elicit surprises and confusion. “Since I’m taking a small break, someone’s going to need to take my place for the race tonight. I want to introduce you to one of my good friends who will be taking my place tonight and for future races. I know you all have been quite curious about him, so why don’t I let him introduce himself? The8, come here please”
Everyone turned to look at the man you pointed to; and the previous disappointment everyone felt vanished, instantly replacing it with excitement. Cheers surrounded Minghao as he made his way towards you. He had a rather shocked face at all the cheers…it was really cute.
“Hello everyone! I’m The8 and I’m taking Zero Light’s place for the time being. I hope you guys won’t be too upset about your future losses and your upcoming loss tonight,” Minghao says with a cocky smirk, firing up the crowd even more.
“Alright, alright. That’s enough boasting, why don’t you actually show them what you’re capable of? Because you may be able to talk the talk but it doesn’t mean you’ll walk the walk. How about it ladies and gentlemen? Are you ready for the race to start,” you shout, screams encompass the parking lot, bouncing off the walls echoing through the small neighbourhood.
Minghao grips the steering wheel, knuckles turning white. He hasn’t felt the rush of adrenaline like this in a really long time. He’s been craving for another taste ever since he lost his love in racing. This. This feeling is what he’s missed for so long. He can’t even say he’s nervous because he’s not. Although he should be with you watching, however, it brings him a sense of comfort knowing that you’ll be watching him race. Watching him win. He let his confidence take the wheel and stepped on the gas as soon as the flag was waved.
Minghao sped down the streets as quickly as he could. Zooming through the streets, weaving through the cars, passing obvious stop signs, and doing his damned best to win. There was no way he was going to let someone show him up. Racing was in his blood after all. It’s what he lived for. It was what drove him to be the person who was. So there was no way he was going to lose.
Minghao had to do a double-take when he saw Jihoon sitting on the hood of his car, waiting for his fellow racers to show up. He didn’t even see Jihoon pass him. How the hell did he get there before him? Minghao storms out of the car, or correction, your car because you oh so graciously let him borrow it, but not without threatening him if he puts a scratch on your precious baby. He marches his way over to Jihoon, “Dude, when did you even get here? I never saw you pass me?”
Jihoon shrugs his shoulders, “maybe you just weren’t looking for me. Slipped right past you, near SVT Street.”
“That far?! Seriously, how did you do it? You have to teach me, but I still can’t believe I lost.”
“Well this is your first street race. You may be a Nascar racer, but you don’t know the streets like we do. We know what streets we can skip, plus we aren’t afraid to play dirty,” you walk up behind Minghao, “don’t be too sad that you lost. It was more than likely you were going to lose against Woozi.”
“I could teach you a couple of tricks if you would like,” Jihoon suggests.
“Yeah, okay. Who knows, they might help me in Nascar racing too. It wouldn’t hurt to try,” Minghao tries not to pout, but couldn’t help it. He genuinely thought he would win. You walk up to him, and without thinking about it, you press your lips gently to his cheek, hoping that you will slightly cheer him up. When you pull your face away from his cheek, you find him staring at you, an unknown emotion swirling around his eyes. You’ve never noticed how his eyes are a vast ocean that will pull you under. It’s almost as if you could find all the answers to the world hidden inside.You would’ve stared longer, but you quickly moved away from Minghao as soon as you heard Jihoon clear his throat behind you. You spun on your heels and practically sprinted to your car.
Jihoon looks over at Minghao to question him about what just happened, but he could tell the man was lost in thought, staring at your faded silhouette. Jihoon just shakes his head at the obliviousness between you two. “Dude, are you just going to stare at her longingly and let her keep waiting for you? Or are you going to follow her? Maybe ask her what the fuck just happened,” Jihoon says, mumbling the last part.
“What?” Minghao furrows his eyebrows and lets confusion fill his features.
“She’s going to leave your sorry ass behind if you don’t hurry up and get it together.”
“Shit,” Minghao sprints after your car, waving his hands hoping to get your attention.
Jihoon sighs, pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose, “idiots to lovers I tell you. Oblivious idiots.” He rolls his eyes and sticks his hands into his pocket and jumps off the hood of his car to head home.
Jihoon has been training Minghao in the art of street racing, alongside you. He’s definitely changed since you first met him at the track. At first he was so reserved, reluctantly answering your questions, but now he can’t stop talking about himself. In a positive way, of course he always remembers to ask you questions in return. Usually, those questions are asked while the both of you are laying on the hood of your car, your head on his chest, and his arm lazily wrapped around your waist. Those nights were your favourite because it’s become some sort of tradition that the both of you would head there after one of Minghao’s street races, but not before grabbing some greasy food to eat while staring at the far city lights, surrounded by thousands of glittering stars.
It was hard to believe that a month has passed since you struck up the deal together. You’ve noticed that not only is he not as reserved, but he’s gotten his spark back. You can see it in the way he smiles while his hands are on the steering, shifting gears, and zooming past cars. He’s finally found himself and his love of racing. However, there’s a few problems that you’ve come to realise.
You realised that you were madly in love with Xu Minghao, especially the Minghao you only got to see. You couldn’t determine whether or not he felt the same, but he had to at least feel something during those nights when he would sing to you, gently kissing your forehead and stroking your cheek while you accidentally fell asleep on the hood of your car.
But the next problem you ran into was a major one. If you were to ever tell Minghao your feelings and he returned them, he would easily forget about you. Afterall, tonight is his final street race before he has the Indy 500 the next day. And once he’s done with the race, he’ll probably go back home, continuing his life as a Nascar racer. Meanwhile, you’ll be left alone in a giant city.
“Hey Minghao! Are you ready for your final race tonight? Even if it’s up against me,” you smirk, walking up to Seokmin’s car. Seokmin let him borrow it for the night because he wasn’t going to use it, not if you, Jihoon, Seungcheol, and Minghao were all planning on racing. No, he valued his life much more than his car.
“Yeah, hope you’re ready to lose this time,” Minghao returns your smirk.
“Against you? Never. Remember who you’re talking to baby, I am Zero Light, the undefeated,” you lean in closer, breath tickling his ear.
“How about this, if I lose against you, I’ll tell you a secret,” he whispers, bringing his hand up to your face, resting his palm on your cheek, gently grazing it with his thumb.
“And if I lose? What will I have to do,” you ask, leaning into his touch.
“Nothing because that’s how confident I’ll win against you,” he pulls his hand away from your face, grabs your hand, kissing your knuckles. His smirk widens when he looks up and sees the light red hue spread across your face.
“I better get back to my…uh… car….the race will…um… be starting soon,” you back up away from the car accidentally bumping into a stranger, “Oh my god, I am so sorry. I wasn’t watching where I was going.” You keep apologising to the stranger, while Seokmin, Jihoon, and Seungcheol all collectively sigh watching both you and Minghao act stupid in front of each other.
You swung open your car door, stomping your way over to him. You swing his door open and yank him out of the car after he unfastens his seatbelt. You bring him into a bone-crushing hug and hold him tight. Tears well up in your eyes and you slightly pull away from him, “I can’t believe you.”
“Can’t believe what? That I won and that you lost,” Minghao teases, looking deep into your eye, mapping every detail of your face.
“No. I can’t believe how far you’ve come during this month. I’m going to miss you when you leave to go home,” you wrap your arms around his neck, drawing his face closer to yours so that you can truly stare into his eyes forever.
“It wasn’t without yours and Jihoon’s help, thank you for everything. I’m…” you can see the hesitancy within his eyes. He wants to say something…he needs to tell you…
“Hao? What is it? You can tell me anything,” you take his face into your hands and gently brush your fingers against his cheek, much like you did before, he leans into your touch.
“I’m going to miss you too…I’m going to miss you more than you can imagine,” you can hear the sincerity in his voice and it takes every last bit of self-control in you to not smash your lips onto his, so all you could offer him was a comforting smile.
Minghao was anxious, you could tell even far up in the bleachers. You wanted to be in the pit with him, cheering for him, but you couldn’t. You were only allowed down there when they weren’t busy getting ready for a race, 1 minute left, you noted, and when it was appropriate for journalists and reporters to ask their questions.
He was pacing back and forth. The anxiety chewed him up inside. He got so used to racing in the street races, that he seemed to forget some of the basic rules. He has to go over them before the race starts. What was it? What was the first rule? Shit…He can’t remember.
Then his phone rings. He knew it was you. He could tell because he purposely picked out a ringtone for you, so that he always knew it was you calling him. “Y/n?”
“Hao…breathe for me. Just remember you’ve got this,” your voice soothes his growing anxiety.
“But what if I accidentally forget that this isn’t a street race and it’s an official one?”
“You won’t. Do you know how I know,” you see him shake his head from a distance, “Because on the track you are Xu Minghao, not The8. You are just yourself and not some persona you put on for others. Because if you lose, I won’t tell you a secret.”
“A secret?”
“Yeah, if you win…I’ll tell you one of my deepest secrets.”
As if a switch was flipped, in that very moment, you could feel the fiery energy radiate off his aura. Even though he was going up against his best friend and your brother, he had confidence in his ability to race. He knew he would win. He had to win. He’s never felt this desire to win this strong before. Not until you gave him a reason to want to win. When he races, he doesn’t care if he wins or loses, as long as he’s feeling the adrenaline pump through his veins he’s okay with losing. But now? You telling him one of your precious secrets? He has to win.
Lap after lap, it felt like the race was never going to end. You felt anxiety raise each time someone overtook Minghao’s first place, but he always seemed to be able to kick it into gear and steal his spot back. You were at the edge of your seat, hanging by a thread. Sometimes, it looked like Minghao wouldn’t even be able to take his spot back, but then suddenly he would use a move Jihoon taught him and it was like appeared out of thin air and was back in first place.Once the race was truly over, you were over the moon excited that Minghao was able to secure his fourth win. But more anxiety came once you realised you had to tell him your secret.
“Hao! Congratulations! I’m so proud of you! After you're done taking pictures and celebrating, can we go to our spot?”
“Of course! I can’t wait to celebrate my win with you,” Minghao sends a wink your way.
“Do you remember what I said to you over the phone before the race started,” you ask, voice barely heard over the whisper of the lofi radio. The gentle glow cascades you both in a paint-like-lighting. Your question pulls Minghao out of his thoughts.
“How could I forget? It was my motivator…the reason I wanted to. It was the first time I ever really felt a desire to win that much,” Minghao looks over at you, but you are avoiding all eye contact with him, just staring out at the setting horizon in front of you, “what is it? The secret?”
“I don’t want you to leave and go back home. I want you to stay here with me…with all of us.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m in love with you. I don’t know when it happened, maybe when I was first introduced to you as a racer or maybe it was after I truly got to know you…” you finally gather the courage to look at Minghao, only to find him already staring at you. There that unknown emotion is again. It’s ever so present, swirling and mixing in his eyes.
You take his long silence as rejection and hop off the hood of the car, you can feel the tears well up and slowly slide down your face. You don’t know where you're walking to and frankly you don’t care, you just want to get as far as you can from MInghao.
You feel gentle fingers grasp your wrist, you turn around to see Minghao crying. Why is he crying? You’re not sure, but you know that you’re crying along with him. “Y/n…you didn’t wait for my answer.”
“You took too long to answer, so I took it as a rejection.”
“Only an idiot would reject you and I am not one. But I am an idiot for not saying something sooner. I wanted to tell you that I loved you last night, but I just couldn’t form the proper words or sentences. I was also going to tell you that I was planning on staying…over the course of the month, Seoul has become my place because you are my home.” Tears start to slide down your face again after his heartfelt confession. He brings a comforting hand and lightly wipes your tear stained cheeks with his fingers…“Beautiful…as always,” slowly his face gets closer to yours. And as you stare into each other's souls, Minghao searches your eyes for any hesitancy and when he doesn't find any; he tilts your chin up, bringing your lips closer to his, finally letting them meld together like two puzzle pieces meant to find each other.
pairing: non-idol! jungwon x gn! reader genre: fluff, angst wc: 1.4k warnings: reader has an undisclosed disease, blood, narrative-heavy, tell me if i missed anything ! n/a: based on the song's mv ! got inspirations from a few of the comments so i decided to grow it to a fic <3
You remember when you were just 10 years old, sitting on a sidewalk, quietly letting yourself get rained on, crying for who knows what reason— you didn't remember. But one thing you remembered that day, was a very cute, same-aged, boy— he's actually a classmate, one you've been crushing on, running to you with a typical black umbrella, staring at you.
No words were said, his eyes already said it all. He was worried, and he knew. He knew how you didn't like looking vulnerable in front of someone, especially him. But as much as you wanted nothing but only to be a normal, simple person in front of the one you loved, he wasn't anything near ready yet.
"I... Here." He hands you a red, flower candy and a pure white handkerchief because for now, that's all he can give you. That's all he can give— temporary happiness, assurance. That's all he was willing to surrender to you, not ready to give his heart to you.
And then he turns to run away, leaving you once again in the countless raindrops that only seem like a bit of your problem, your bleeding nose as most of it. He guesses it's the reason for your tears.
He could only turn to a corner and look down, hiding the silent tears that flowed out of his eyes. He wouldn't deny that he was being a coward— but he was still young. Love is scary. And he knows that even though love can make you happy just as much pain it can give you, he wasn't willing to take half the pain off of you yet. He wasn't willing to share your pain yet.
"I'm sorry..." He mumbles particularly to no one, but he hopes that the strong wind gets his message to you. He looks up at the sky, slightly letting the rain get on his pretty face before closing his eyes, then taking a deep sigh before he went his own way.
You sat there, staring at where Jungwon turned with a solemn expression on your face. It was okay, being left in the rain by the boy you've loved ever since you can remember. It was okay that even though he left you in the rain, not letting you borrow his umbrella, and instead just giving you candy and a handkerchief, you understood him.
Because even at such an early age, you knew how just like he didn't share his umbrella with you, he wasn't willing to share your pain too. You understood, so you smile. A soft one, a small one. Patting the semi-wet handkerchief on your nose, you see how the white cloth immediately drowns in light red with your blood.
You tuck your head back to feel the sunshine amidst the rain, closing your eyes. And with a smile, you mumble.
"It's okay."
What you don't remember now is how you ended up sitting on a hospital bed, at eighteen years old. Just simply staring outside the windows, admiring the leaves swaying around and some falling with a soft smile on your face.
"Hey," Hearing a cheery voice, though very low, along with the sound of your door sliding open as he slips inside. A bouquet of red charm peonies in his hand and a box of who knows what in his other.
"Jungwon," You slightly shift on your place, facing him with now a bigger smile, asking him to sit on the chair next to your bed. It's not like you were feeling worse, or losing days– you were, albeit not soon, it was just better staying here, if you want to prolong your life.
"I also got you these," Jungwon opens the box settled on your lap, revealing tons of that red flower candy that has come to be your favorite.
"Thank you," You smiled at him, peeling the plastic off of the candy and popping it in your mouth.
And it was quiet.
For years, after that incident when you were ten years old, Jungwon had always found little ways to show you how he cared... how he loved you.
And little by little, together, you mature, as to how your love does.
"Can we take a walk in the gardens?" You turn to him, standing up and dragging your IV stand with you as you stood in front of Jungwon with a confused face.
"Right now? It looks like it's going to rain," He peeks outside the window, dark clouds making their way closer.
"The wind before the rain is the best type of wind, Jungwon. You didn't know that?" You were already walking to the door as Jungwon tails you, though hesitant, getting your wool coat draped on the chair. "Trust me, I know. The petrichor is the best– for me, at least. It gives me some kind of... comfort. And it makes me remember the time you first saw me... like that. Leaving me with only a candy and a cloth," You chuckle, shooting him a glance and you see his signature dimples, making him more attractive than he already is.
You finally arrived at the big doors leading you to the garden, and it was obviously empty because of the dark clouds. It makes you squeal a little at the excitement, bursting through the doors as the petrichor welcomes you outside.
"Ah, Won– I forgot my coa–," And he drapes the coat in his arm over your shoulders, a soft smile on his face.
"There." The harsh wind has blown your hair on your face, and Jungwon gladly brushes it off and hooks it on your ear.
"Oh, and my handkerchief. Just stay here–,"
"No, you stay here. I forgot something too." He cuts you off once again, pushing you down lightly on one of the benches. "I'll be back, okay?"
With a little nod, you smile at him gratefully before hugging yourself, watching him walk away with a hop.
Inhaling the fresh scent, your smile only gets bigger at the solemnity it gave you, feeling droplets finally fall lightly on your face even while the sun slowly hid behind the clouds.
You were happy. You were feeling ecstatic, knowing that you had your loved ones, including the one you've wished for all your life, close to you.
Even the thought makes your heartbeat beat more than you could contain.
And before the rain pours on you, you finally stand up with a satisfied smile, thinking that maybe Jungwon was still finding the handkerchief.
But as soon as you turn around, Jungwon was there– just like how he stood before you that one time when you were ten years old.
This time, a red umbrella was covering him, but still the same candy and the handkerchief in his other hand. And unlike the frown he had the first time, this time, it was a smile on his face. A sincere one, a genuine one.
It was when he realized.
He was ready– actually, it should've been earlier. He shouldn't have wasted time sitting around making you feel less than what he actually felt.
And now, he was willing to give his everything to you. He peels the pure red candy out of its plastic and hovers it over rainwater, the pigment dripping out of the candy.
Maybe it was childish– he didn't care. He wanted only you to understand that by this time, he was ready. He was now willing to share your pain, as he smears his nose with the sticky pigment, making you wholeheartedly laugh.
He walks closer to you, wiping the rainwater first in your face and then on your nose. He looks at you closely, scooting his arm that held the umbrella closer to you– this time only on you as the rain poured, getting himself wet outside the cover.
"I am not the same kid that left you in the rain when we were then, y/n." Jungwon whispers, and even though the pouring rain was loud, his whispers were louder for you. "I was young– we were. I wasn't ready for anything– the responsibilities, the commitment, the pain. And before I knew it, I ran away and left you. But this time, y/n..."
His cold hand cups your cheeks, and it makes you lean into it as it contrasts your warm face. He leans in to rest his lips on your forehead, and you raise the umbrella higher to let him in, as you've been waiting for him to do. You smile underneath the coldness and at the same time, the warmth that he emitted, feeling him whisper against your skin.
"...I'm willing to bear the pain of the person I love most,"
