#kaylarenee

[kaylarenee98]

Poem by Kayla Renee

I cannot breathe the breath of life

Death has taken my hand 

He guides me through the depths of night

I follow his command

I dwell in the dark with demons

Strangely tranquil is my hell

I have always been a heathen

Here below Earth - I now dwell

I reap the gifts of death

Swarm the forests of the free

Here I feel I may confess

To sin I have the key

Of the greedy gruesome God above

I do not wish to know

The Devil - he has shown me love

Since oh so long ago

I drink the drug of eternal night

Like ecstasy in my bones

I hear the storm - the bellowing brontide

Your “God” has been dethroned

[kaylarenee98]

Eternity by Kayla Renee

Eternity is in the mind

It's alive and boundless

So deep inside the things you’ll find

Fears we have are groundless

Cruel is the minds fragility

All i seek is solace

They caught me in my reverie

Our thoughts are far beyond us

I lie right here in ecstasy

I speak to the Goddess -

Her voice reminds me mind savagely

Of a broken promise -

The mind enjoys playing cruel tricks

How do you find the truth

When it’s as obscure as an eclipse?

You cannot trust your muse

[kaylarenee98]

Fragility by Kayla Renee

The arcane mind weighs heavily on my soul      

As dark as this brumous day -

All of these thoughts have taken their toll

My own conscience has led me astray

How one wishes to abvolate

To be one with the bee

Instead I seem to suffocate -

Breaking - oh my fragility

My ethereal being - soon expiring

I shatter easily -

There is some error in my wiring

My death - soon to  be

[kaylarenee98]

Lexicon Experiment by Kayla Renee

Death

They asked me what it was like to die, I told them it was beautiful and that I’ve been doing it for years. Everything around us is on fire, can’t you feel us burning? It smells of rot and sweat ridden flesh. My senses are in overdrive as I wake up in a hospital bed surrounded by the sick and dying. There is a metallic taste in my mouth and I spit into the bowl beside me. Dead…they said I was dead.

Dread

I dread going home each day. I dread the fire that assaults me with blazing heat the moment I walk through the door. Home should be warm; safe; so why isn’t mine? I dread speaking about my past just as much as I dread my own uncertain future.

Damned

I’m damned. This I know and this I accept. I’ll make a home of hell and all below will fear me, I will be their mother and their nightmare. I thrive below the burning depths of the crumbling Earth. Don’t you see? Hell is where I belong, I was always meant to be damned.

Dark

Never did I fear the dark, I sit comfortably in black. The voices begin and I am no longer alone. Whispers. These whispers only speak to me in the total absence of light. I am not afraid, the dark keeps me company in a world where I am otherwise alone.

Daffodils

I blow the daffodils caught in the spider's web, salvaging the wishes that whisper in the wind. Words never spoken - fulfilled in dreams instead, perhaps these wishes dwell in sin. Mortality makes one dream persistently, wanting for what one cannot have. Oh, the soul's powerlessness - its inability, wound us - dividing the possibilities in half.

Dungeon

Dark and abandoned, like the depths of my mind. Dirty and damp, this dungeon contains me in its walls, holding me hostage. I present a threat to society and have no place in it. They’ve locked me up and I’ll never leave, but it’s okay. I have the voices to keep me company.

Danger

I present a danger to myself, to the world in its entirety. My very existence is an act against nature and I defy the gods as I break their rules and find pleasure where I shouldn’t.

[kaylarenee98]

Wander by Kayla Renee

On this road we wildly wander

Far from the land of dreams

Reality is the disease I ponder

Its chaos drowns out my screams

Eden is far from this world that I know

Anguish dwells all around

Around every corner - faced with a foe

Our souls nowhere to be found

Unfading is the cry of the crow

Clinging to its nest

Mournful is the song it sings

It does not know to rest

This world deceives the fragile minded

Promises of a God

Intoxicated by the butterfly

When rather it is the stinging bee - a fraud

Untouched are we by some immortal tune

Drunkenly we stagger - lost

He who casts the first stone

Quick to punish - no concern for the cost

[kaylarenee98]

Father by Kayla Renee

He broke her– once as a baby bird 

And once as a girl who thought she was made of fire

She held on and whelved her heart deep

Oh how she held on tight

Madness became her anchor

Father - her fight

She made up worlds

Using madness and her mind

Tricked herself with magic potions

But it was only Hell she’d find

Back to father as he caught up

Desperately she would hide

But no matter where she ran to

He would hunt her til’ she died

[kaylarenee98]

Regarding One's Soul by Kayla Renee

Death- You have violated my being

My soul has become dark - procellous

I believe it may be bleeding

You take so many others - for my turn I am zealous

I cannot control my dolorous mind 

It is overwhelming - like a screaming storm in the night

Or a crow crying as it flies around blind

Will you come for me tonight?

I sit pensive in this winter air

Frost stabbing my frail skin

Of my soul I am aware

I am living a life of sin

My mask fools all those present 

A clever trick - a lie

For my being is unpleasant

The rules here I defy

[kaylarenee98]

On the Rail We Roam by Kayla Renee

On the rail we roam rapidly

The voyage that carries us to our death

No escape from this train that moves jaggedly

Not a moment is given to rest

I beg of you sweet end - do you come for me?

From this world I yearn to abscond        

Death - the only suitor for my morbidity

It is in your embrace alone that I am calmed

As the sun when it hits the sea

I do not wish to correspond - with life's absurdity

Do you hear my nightly chants?

I call for you alone 

To sirenize with a transcendent dance

For my soul I will atone

I hear the wail of the banshee

A sound ethereal to witness    

Brings me to sobriety

I die with such a swiftness

It is not as you think - my demise

Ineffable it may be

Sanity does not apply

I craved eternal ecstasy

Barbarically bellicostic are the living

I take pleasure in departing

I rout wildly - so thrilling

Something new in me is starting

So phthartic is the soul inside

How dolent is the mind

But they use it not for good - No! But to ignify

Kindness - they’ve declined

I have dreams of a Utopia

Visions of a vagary existence                

But all I feel is claustrophobia

Yet so much space - so much distance!