I've been having really weird feelings spiritually recently. It's hard to explain, but it's like everything around me is changing. It's not bad, I feel like I'm seeing life in a way I haven't before. In a better way, like I can appreciate reality for what it is without yearning for more. I can appreciate what I'm blessed with and I can accept what may not be as good. Everything happens for a reason; I've always said it but now I really feel it. I am where I am because that's where I'm meant to be. The universe doesn't make mistakes.
I think the biggest change is the lack of want. I just don't want anything anymore. I don't expect anything from anyone, I don't expect to gain anything. It's actually a good thing, it's a feeling of being content with my life. I don't feel like I have anything missing. I have everything I need, the universe has given me everything I'm meant to have and anything I gain after this is because it's my time for it to happen.
I've also been trying to induce ego death. That part isn't as easy, it's hard to truly separate your true self from your perceived self. But I've been looking inwards and finding the parts of me that are true. The cold, bitter, mean person I presented as wasn't me. That was simply what I was conditioned by society to be. My true me is one of love and compassion for all. My true me is the one who finds beauty in existing. Not the one who feels hate, who feels jealousy, who feels rage.
I've had this revelation in the past, soon after I met 🔮 and especially after I visited the Akashic Records. But it slipped away from me recently and I found myself falling back into my ego. I hope now that I'm aware of it, I can keep it permanently or at the very least embrace that truth more than the ego.
I've been writing a lot the past few days, I can probably post some of my notes tomorrow. It's a bit late for me right now though hah. Anyways, I hope to use this account more.
(P.S. I know I mention 🔮 a lot, in almost every post. But besides just me being obsessed with him, he also has been a big help in my spiritual journey. If anyone is curious about me and him specifically, I've been thinking about making a post going more in-depth about how he's affected me spiritually. Maybe... maybe.)
