The view from the top of the world tree was Gon’s favorite sight to behold. Well, one of his favorites. If he was being honest, his favorite involved a shy smile, a faint blush, and a pair of cat like eyes the color of the night sky. But the view now, 1784 meters above a bustling city full of travelers, was a close second.
The sky around him was growing dim, the sun sinking behind the clouds on the horizon.
It had been a year since Gon last sat atop this tree. He wasn’t sure why he ventured back here now, he just got a feeling in his gut, and he had learned by now to follow that feeling when it arose.
So here he was, eating an apple and reflecting on the last year of his life as twilight blue slowly replaced the bright orange in the sky.
It had been quite a year. He traveled with Ging for about 6 months. Those months passed by in a flash until one day Gon woke up to a note from his father saying that he had some business to attend to /alone/, but that their paths were sure to cross again one day.
Gon split the latter half of the year between resting on Whale Island with Mito-San, and training with Bisky. There were also frequent trips to visit friends, of course. He had gone to see Kite, Shoot and Knuckle, Leorio, and even Mr. Wing and Zushi. The one friend he hadn’t yet met up with was also the person he wanted to see the most.
It had been a full year since he had last seen Killua. They’d corresponded often enough through texts and the occasional phone call. Gon even sent postcards from each new place he had visited with his dad, but Killua wasn’t the best pen pal.
It made Gon sad in a way he couldn’t quite describe, but he cherished the communication he was able to have with his friend, and if he was being honest, he understood the cold distance.
They made up before parting at the world tree a year ago, but so much had been left unsaid. Gon knew his own selfish recklessness had caused damage, but he wasn’t sure how to fix it; and with Ging precariously waiting on him, he didn’t have the time to fix it anyway. He knew Killua understood this, but it didn’t mean that things were 100% okay between them. Gon let out a deep sigh, his shoulders slumped. By now the sky was blue-black, all traces of the day vanished. He supposed he should head down, make his way to the city square and get a room at the inn for the night. Maybe tomorrow he would just pick a place randomly and travel to it. Exploring usually made him feel better. /then why did he still feel bad after a year of doing just that?/
Another sigh. He shook his head to clear it and stood up when a flash in the distance caught his eye. He squinted at the horizon. The flash lit the sky once more. He couldn’t quite make out what it was, but it seemed so familiar... His heart skipped a beat. He knew that flash. He had seen it before, a little over a year ago. Another flash of blue-white light cut across the sky in the distance. Without another thought Gon squeezed his eyes shut, slipped into Zetsu, and began his descent.
Killua let out a half hearted yawn as he linked his fingers behind his head and walked towards the door. Alluka lie asleep in her bed by the window, exhausted from another long day of traveling. Killua figured he would use this time to blow off some steam, so he was headed to the clearing he saw on their way in, about a mile away from the inn they were staying at for the night.
The night air was cool and there was a slight breeze tousling Killua’s silver locks as he walked. He still wasn’t sure exactly why they were here or where they were going to be headed tomorrow, and his own uncertainty was irritating him.
He always had a plan and usually a few backup plans in mind, but for some reason getting to this small city full of travelers today was about as far as his mind would let him think through.
He and Alluka had spent the last year moving from place to place, seeing all that the world had to offer. They both spent far too long locked away at the Zoldyck estate, so the freedom of open ended and spontaneous travel was exactly what they both needed.
It had been an amazing year, but the former assassin still felt like something was missing. He couldn’t quite put his finger on what it was, or maybe he could but it just hurt a bit too much to think about.
Memories of the last time he had been in this city danced through his head. Feelings of lingering grief, sadness, and joy mingled as a familiar face smiled in his mind’s eye. Spikes of raven hair, golden eyes finally open and shining again after being shut for so long... Killua shook his head and let out a sigh. He had reached the clearing and it was time to have some fun.
Letting his eyes fall shut, he took a deep breath and focused his nen. Almost instantly he felt a tingle of electricity run up his spine and down through his arms and legs. The air around him was humming with energy as he bolted across the clearing. It felt so good to be running. When he quickly made it across, he dashed back again, leaving charred grass in his wake. A few times back and forth and he was already bored of the small space. He wished he had more room to really run and let loose. Maybe their next stop should be somewhere with a heavy forrest.
Now standing in the center of the field, he focused his nen in his hands and tossed a ball of lightning up into the air, watching it pop, sending small sparks raining down. He repeated this for a while, running laps and then launching bolts of electricity. Welp. He supposed it was time to head back, this was about as entertaining as it was going to get.
It was now pitch black outside, so he decided he’d run back to the inn allowing his nen to illuminate the way. He charged up before turning on his heel. Just as he was about to launch himself forward, he heard a rustle in the bushes behind him.
Before he could react, he felt a body thump against him and arms wrap around his back. Without a thought, Killua let out a wave of electricity and twirled around, flinging the other person to the ground. He steadied his footing and prepared himself for a fight.
Electricity crackled around his body, lighting the area around him enough to actually see the person now standing up in front of him.
“G-gon?!” His mouth dropped open, jaw completely slack.
“Killua!!” The other boy’s grin stretched from ear to ear as he stepped closer to his friend.
Killua released his nen and took a step forward as well. “How—W-What are you doing here?? I didn’t even sense your presence. Why would you sneak up on me like that?? I almost kicked your ass!”
Gon let out a giggle. “I saw you turn to leave just as I got here and I didn’t want to miss you! I was sitting at the top of the world tree when I noticed some flashes of lightning. I was hoping it might be you, and it was!” Gon reached his hand up to rub the back of his neck. “Can-can I give you a real hug now?”
Killua’s eyes were wide as saucers as his body moved forward of its own accord. Gon was here. Right in front of him, now wrapping him up in a bear hug. It was all he could do to remain standing, his legs suddenly felt like jello.
Standing in his friend’s embrace was a strange and familiar feeling. He was suddenly overwhelmed by comfort and warmth. He somehow felt /whole/ again, like a last missing puzzle piece had finally been put in its rightful place.
Gon had gotten taller, they were almost the same height now, and his arms were strong and toned. He still smelled exactly how Killua remembered, like earth and sunshine.
Killua’s chest felt tight and his blood was pounding in his ears. How was this happening? After all this time, their reunion was a chance meeting in the middle of the night? And what was Gon doing here, of all places? Hell, he didn’t even know what /he/ was doing here himself. Had they both somehow just been pulled to this city by some invisible force, drawing them together? And what now? Were they just supposed to act like everything was normal? Like the last year hadn’t passed by and like distance hadn’t grown between them? There was so much that was left unsaid, and Killua almost preferred it that way. It was easier than facing the hurt feelings and old wounds that never healed properly.
He stood there, body completely still as his mind and heart both raced and fought a war with each other.
He felt Gon squeeze him, tight yet gentle, and then felt warm breath at his ear.
“I’ve missed you so much, Killua.”
That was it. He couldn’t take this anymore. Killua’s nerves felt like live wires and before he knew what he was doing, he shoved Gon off of him with all his might.
The boy fell to the ground with a harsh thud several feet away. Killua flinched at the sound, but didn’t move.
This was all too much. Seeing Gon, feeling him, after all this time, and with no warning. Conflicting thoughts and emotions were clouding his brain. He was overjoyed that his friend was in front of him, but he couldn’t shake the way his heart ached just as it had a year ago when they split at the world tree.
He had so much he needed to say to Gon, but he didn’t know where to start, and he wasn’t sure it would even make him feel better. His heart sank down to his stomach.
He wanted to run far away, but something kept him rooted to the spot as his friend grunted and shakily pulled himself up from the ground.
Gon took a step forward “Killua, what the-“
“Don’t move! Just stay away. I-I can’t be near you right now.”
Gon took another step forward. “Killua, can we just talk for a moment...”
“No! I said stay back, Gon.”
Killua didn’t know what he was saying or doing, he just wanted his chest to stop hurting. Sparks began to fill the space around him and the air buzzed with electricity as his Nen charged around his body.
A silence fell between them.
“Fine. We’ll do this your way.”
Before Killua had a chance to ask what the other boy meant, an orange glow had already enveloped Gon’s form.
“Gon. What are you doing?”
“You won’t talk to me, so let’s fight. If you win, I’ll leave. You don’t have to talk to me or see me ever again. If I win, you have to talk to me.”
“G-Gon, are you crazy? I’m not gonna fight you, don’t be ridiculous!”
“Says the one who just shoved me! I meant what I said, so fight me Killua!”
Killua couldn’t believe what he had just heard. How could he fight Gon? What if they really hurt each other? What if he won? He knew Gon would stand by his word, and did he really never want to see his best friend again? And what if Gon won? Was he prepared to lay everything out like that? All of the frustration and sadness. Would he even be able to get it all out? He couldn’t decide which outcome was worse.
“Well, Killua? Are you going to make a move? Or are you too afraid to fight me?”
Killua could see the sly smile spreading on Gon’s face. Welp. There was no other choice.
“You wish!” He hollered before dashing forward, right fist extended and aiming for the tan boy’s face.
He braced his arm for impact in vain as Gon shot out of the way in a flash.
Woah. When had he gotten so fast?
A smile crept onto Killua’s face as he came to a halt and turned to face Gon again, now standing about three feet to his left.
“Missed me!” Gon giggled, tongue poking out.
“Baka, don’t let your guard down!” He launched a kick in Gon’s direction.
Gon crossed his arms and blocked the foot flying at his stomach, staggering back a few inches. He focused his nen in his first. “I hope you don’t mind a round of Rock, Paper, Scissors!” he teased, thrusting his first into Killua’s side.
Killua gasped as the wind was knocked out of him. When had Gon gotten this strong? A bit irritated now, Killua decided to stop fooling around. “I always beat you at that, remember? What makes you think this is any different?” He sneered before launching himself forward and then slicing a line through the air with his leg. This time, the kick landed. Gon was knocked back a few feet before collapsing onto the grass.
He stood quickly and grounded his footing. Before he could focus enough to throw another punch, Killua was sending another kick his way. With a deep breath, he channeled his nen in his arms and caught Killua’s leg. Instead of just blocking, this time he gripped the boy’s ankle and used it to sling him in a semi circle. He released mid spin, sending the former assassin flying.
Now Killua was downright /pissed/
He quickly stood and darted forward, charging a ball of electricity in the palm of his hand and then launching it at Gon. The other boy quickly ducked, narrowly avoiding it.
The raven haired boy charged forward suddenly, both fists glowing orange. Killua didn’t have time to react before one of them was colliding with the underside of his jaw. He flew into the air, landing on his hands and knees.
He felt some blood drip down his chin from a busted lip. Standing up, he let out a low growl as he wiped it away with the back of his hand. “What the fuck Gon?!”
Gon, already poised to throw another punch dropped his arm, a confused look on his face. “Huh?”
“We’re fighting, Killua! Did you think I was just going to let you win?”
“This whole thing is stupid! We shouldn’t be fighting at all!”
“Are you just saying that because you’re mad that I’m winning?” Gon smirked.
Killua, now livid, ground his teeth, fists clenched at his sides.
“You’re so selfish Gon! Making me fight just because you want to talk. I don’t want to fight you! Did you ever stop to think about that? You’re forcing me to do this and in the end if I fight my best and beat your ass I’ll feel bad and you’ll never speak to me again? But if I take it easy on you, I get my own ass beat and have to talk to you? Fuck you Gon! You can’t just make people do whatever you want!”
Gon was staring at him, eyes wide and mouth in a tight line. “Killua, I just...I just needed you to talk to me! Ever since we went our separate ways, we haven’t been the same. You never wanted to meet up, you hardly responded when I sent letters and post cards. It’s like you didn’t care at all! So when I finally saw you, here of all places, after all this time, I couldn’t just let you walk away again!”
Killua just shook his head. “There you go again, like everything is about you!” He lunged forward, connecting a punch with Gon’s cheek. “I’m tired of spending all my time following behind you, making sure you’re okay and cleaning up the messes you make!” He threw another punch, this time hitting Gon square in the stomach. “What about ME? Do you even care how I feel?” He pulled his fist back and sent it flying forward again, this time Gon caught it.
They stood for a moment, Gon’s hand wrapped around Killua’s fist, holding his arm in place, their expressions both pained.
“I-of course I care! I care so much, Killua! A-and I’m so sorry! For what happened last year. I /was/ being selfish. And reckless. I didn’t stop to think about you or what I was doing. All I could think about was Kite, losing his life because of me! I had to avenge him and I let my anger blind me. I was broken, and nothing else was going to fix me-“
“FIX YOU?! You killed yourself Gon!”
Killua tore his hand away and kicked Gon in the side, knocking him to the ground.
“If I hadn’t been there to pull you out of that place and if I hadn’t gotten Alluka to heal you, you’d be DEAD! And then what? What was I supposed to do without you? Without my best friend?”
“Whatever you’ve been doing the past year!”
Silence fell over them. Tears stained Gon’s cheeks and Killua’s eyes sparkled with tears he refused to let fall.
Gon stood on wobbly legs, arms wrapping around his stomach.
“You saved me, Killua. You’ve always been there helping me and I’ll never be able to thank you for everything you’ve done for me.”
Killua scoffed, Gon winced.
“But if you’re not in my life, I won’t even get the chance to try! You’re my best friend, Killua. Having you just ignore me is worse than being dead!”
With that, Gon launched himself forward, knocking Killua onto the ground and then falling down on top of him. The silver haired boy struggled underneath him, but he locked his arms and legs around him and wouldn’t let him up.
After a few moments of struggling, Killua let his body go limp under Gon’s weight. Tears were finally streaming freely down his pale cheeks.
Both boys let themselves cry, the sounds of labored breathing and broken sobs filled the space around them.
“I thought I lost you, Gon. For days I didn’t know if I’d be able to get Alluka to you, or if her power would even work. It felt like you were already gone. I guess I wasn’t able to stop feeling that way, even after it all turned out okay. And even through that sadness and then relief, I was still so /angry/ with you.”
“You’re allowed to be upset. I’m so sorry Killua. I just wanted the chance to try and make it better.”
Gon wiped his eyes and looked down at Killua. Warm honey met midnight blue and they stayed like that, just staring at each other for who knows how long.
The silence between them was comfortable now, and seemed to say so much. Killua understood what Gon had gone through and why he did what he did. He always had. Still, it was nice to hear a real apology. To be able to get how he felt off his chest.
Gon now understood the distance Killua was keeping between them. It pained him to know just how deeply he had hurt his friend. He had always had an idea of how much damage was done, but finally hearing it was strangely a relief. Now, if he was lucky enough to be given the chance, he could make it all up to him.
“Can I-can we, maybe travel together again? I-It doesn’t have to be forever. Maybe just for a while! I’m happy with any time you’ll give me.”
Killua’s face was calm and hard to read.
“We were supposed to stay together before. But you ran off on your own to fight, like you didn’t even want me there...”
“I did! But I guess I also didn’t. I just didn’t want you to get hurt. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you got hurt because of me.”
Killua laughed monotonously.
“Gon, leaving me behind hurt me. You throwing your life away hurt me.”
Gon’s face fell. “I understand.”
He rolled off of Killua, landing in the grass next to him. Staring up at the sky, tears blurring his vision as the stars twinkled above them.
“If it helps you to know, I always want you with me.” He sniffled a bit and tangled his fingers in the grass.
Killua turned his head to stare at the boy. His profile against the night sky was just as he remembered.
“When I was traveling with Ging, I missed you so much. So many amazing adventures and each one of them just made me wish you were there to see it all, too.”
Killua was thankful for the darkness concealing the blush now spreading across his cheeks.
“I-I know what you mean.”
Gon instantly perked up, turning his head to face his friend. “You do?” The hope in his voice made Killua’s heart skip a beat.
“Alluka and I have been traveling all over, and each new place just made me think of how much you would’ve loved to be there.”
Killua threw his arm over his face to hide it. “It...never felt quite right without you, Gon.”
An unusually long pause made Killua curious. He peeked out from under his arm and was met with Gon perched on his elbows and beaming down at him.
Killua groaned. “What? Why’re you looking at me like that?”
Gon’s smile widened as he spoke “It’s just nice to know you missed me like I missed you, Killua.”
“Y-yeah.” His cheeks were on fire now and he hoped Gon wouldn’t notice.
He did, but didn’t say anything. Choosing instead to just admire the pale boy, finally beside him again.
The pair laid in the grass for a while, just staring up at the sky, and stealing glances when they thought the other wasn’t looking. They shared stories of their adventures over the past year, gradually working together to close the distance that had formed between them. Before long, the moon began to set, making way for the sunrise that wasn’t far off.
Killua moved to sit up, and Gon felt his stomach sink. Their perfect bubble was about to burst.
Killua stood, brushing the dirt and grass off of his clothes. “Better head back now, before Alluka wakes up.”
Gon tried to hide the sadness in his voice. “Right, she’d be so worried if she woke up and you weren’t there.”
“Well, aren’t you coming?” He asked, offering his hand to Gon.
“Gon, we’ve gotta get a move on. Alluka wakes up with the sunrise. It’s actually kind of annoying sometimes, I never get to sleep in. And we have to figure out where we’re going today. I hadn’t planned that far ahead yet.”
Gon’s smile was brighter than the sun now peaking over the horizon. He grabbed Killua’s hand and stood up before yanking the boy into another hug. This time, Killua hugged back.
When they pulled apart, Gon had a curious look on his face.
Killua quirked an eyebrow. “What?”
“I was just thinking, it’s not like you to not have a plan.”
“Yeah, well, I guess...maybe I was just waiting for you. We can decide where we go together.”
Gon reached down and squeezed his friend’s hand. “As long as we’re together, anywhere sounds good to me!”
“You’re so embarrassing” Killua grumbled, reaching up to scratch the back of this head. Gon just smiled and hummed as they turned in the direction of the inn and started walking.
“Thank you for letting me be by your side again. This time I promise I won’t leave.”
Killua’s cheeks were rosy as a smile swept across his face. “You should really be thanking me for letting you win the fight. Race you to the inn!” He shot forward in a flash.
Gon let out a hearty laugh and for the first time in so long, he followed behind his friend.
