So I admit that I am swooning over Eugenides like a stupid fangirl but if I met him there's one thing that I would say to him: Grow up.
Do you know what his unlikeable trait is?
That he can do whatever he wants, because he is a man.
This guy can grin and steal and be pathetic and whiny and be sick and make a show of his own court and he is free to do so because he is a man. In the TQTverse, a man is still seen as worth more than a woman.
Attolia must keep her composure at all times. She cannot afford to play around like Eugenides can, else she loses her throne in a day. She has made herself a fearsome creature because she HAD TO, and she must kill, and she must keep her barons in check, all while Eugenides gets to excuse himself from the executions because he can't bear it. Attolia can't bear it either, but guess what, she has to.
She's the strong one in their relationship so Gen, who doesn't want to be king, can be weak. You think Attolia wanted to be queen???
When Attolia catches Gen it's because the Gods betrayed him, not because Attolia's palace guard finally succeeded in cracking his secrets or because Gen became reckless and did something stupid.
When Attolia gets kissed by a foreign ambassador, it's not her who rises to defend herself, it's Gen who does (because she lets him and he loves her but still). Were I her, I would not have let that ambassador get away with an apology. Just saying.
I don't want to dive too deeply into this, because Attolia is still a formidable ruler and enemy all by herself - someone who can definitely be cunning and make her own decisions - but she has to fight twice as hard to keep the mask on, and cannot allow it to slip, EVER, while Gen is just free to be himself most of the time. Yes, even as king. His challenges as king are seen as a whole arc that gets wrestled through and described, whereas hers are seen as self-evident, not worth mentioning more than necessary. She just has to function and survive no matter what happens. He's used to taking his freedom more often as well. You could never find Attolia sneaking into a tavern. She hasn't learned that she can do that. Because she has learned that her reputation can't afford it. Plus, whatever takes place, Gen still has Eddis at his back, but Attolia is alone.
The difference is that Attolia must be stern and she cannot make mistakes... Eugenides, however, can make mistakes, be stupid, and have fun. Six books. Six books, and we have seen Eugenides sorely humbled, and we have seen Attolia learn to trust, but we have not seen Attolia have fun. Not really. Smiling on occasion, or watching her husband have fun, is not her own fun. It's why she envies Eddis' fun. That's something that has begun to bother me tbh, I want to advocate for her personal life so hard. She's amazing.
You know whose struggles I genuinely support? Sophos'. My man became king through the help of someone else, and he will have to bear that with gratefulness through all his life and fight to create his own fame. The queen made me, I make the king.
So to Gen, my man: You're not the only one who suffers. Grow up.
