continued from here [x] @claretpassion
† When it came to his patients, Toya cared a great deal for them. It was ironic. When he was much younger, he’d swore to himself that he’d never follow into the footsteps of being a doctor. But now over ten years later, there he stood in a privately owned family clinic in a white coat and clipboard in hand reviewing medical charts.
His new patient was sensitive due to the news he had to get surgery on his knee. And injury he received while playing sports rendered him to the only option of surgery if wanted to continue. Toya understood the fear that stemmed from the low possibility that he could never play again. But this doesn’t comes from his confidence in his skills of a successful operation alone, but he felt reviewed the damage and knew that after the surgery and a little occupational therapy ⸺ he’d return in high peak performance as he were before.
❛ You still have time to make this decision, Shigino-san,❜ Toya said. ❛ The risks of the opertation itself does seem scary, but I can do my best to make sure you’d continue to be in that 94% success rate of this operation. I just will have to ask you to trust me a bit. ❜ †
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Of course when it was stated like that, with the probability weighed heavily in his favor, his emotional response seemed stupid and childish. 94% that was near perfect. What in the world was he worried about in the first place? It seemed so silly and inappropriate to feel this intense pressure building in his chest. His heartbeat raced and it was hard to even listen to the doctor’s calming voice over the din of it thumping in his ears.
But what if he was one of the 6%?
Everyone would tell him he was a fool not to go through with the surgery after hearing about the chances and having a very kind man before him asking him to put a little trust into him. Yet if he did go through with it and you happened to be in that small margin percentage group… everyone just treats you with pity. 
“I know it seems stupid, rationally I know that. I’m aware of the chances and the situation and accept the possibility but… it just feels like a lose-lose.” Kisumi admitted looking away from the doctor as a huge sigh escaped him, the anxiety in his chest still lingering. “I know I’m going to go through with the surgery, I just—“ he couldn’t figure out any way to express the unfounded feelings clawing at his throat.
