#koyabell

[confessionsofthisintrovert]

I got to work 9-4, go on a date. This is my cute little date, then go back and work for a few more hours cuz no one else can yayyyyyy.... I miss my #koyabell class :( And i missed my doctors appt. Oops? Lol @straversshort #myboyfriend #mydate #looklikeihaventslept #cuzihavent #moneyforvegas #imsotired

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a little gym etiquette

So I know a lot of people post gym etiquette stuff, like what to do, what not to do. (Like talk loudly on your phone) but this is something different...

Here’s the thing. I applaud every single person that goes to the gym to get healthy and better themselves. I mean, go you, kick some ass, you got this!!!! I don’t care what you look like because you’re there and that’s awesome, you’re lapping all those people on the couch.

But here’s my issue: the people who are working out and making fun of other people working out. Let me expand on that- I am a bigger girl, smaller than when I first started but still larger. That’s okay, because guess what, I go to Koyabell and the gym to get healthy, so I understand it’s not an overnight fix and yay for me for working on bettering myself. I’m not the only person there on the large side and when I’m at the gym, I see these other people on one of the cardio machines huffing and puffing and looking almost embarrassed by this fact but all I can think is ‘Good for you.’ I know it’s not easy to start or keep going. When I started, i couldn’t go on the bike for more than 5 minutes without wanting to cry. I get upset that they look embarrassed by this because it’s almost like they don’t realize how strong and awesome they are, that I am, that we all are.

But as I walk past the cardio machines and head towards the free weights and the likes, I can feel these eyes following me. The people on the cardio machines wondering why I would dare go over into that section, that section is for the ‘other people.’ You know the ones, the ones that either need to build muscle or are completely jacked already and according to everyone else, they belong there. Like there’s some visible line in the gym. If you want to build muscle or get more jacked you stay on the right side of the gym but if you’re a bigger person and need to lose weight, you get to the cardio machines and don’t you even think about crossing over. It’s a huge misconception that if you need to lose weight you should only be doing cardio, not true, ahh, but I digress.... back to the invisible line.

This line is there, and anyone needs to cross it to get to the bathrooms and whenever i did, I would get this look from people, like ‘why are you here?’ and it bugged me, but when I first started going back to the gym, I was the cardio people. Hanging out on that side and using all the cable machines when I did weights as I did a lot of biking at the beginning, not for weight loss alone, but also to help my knees because they were really sore at the time. And if I crossed that line and get the looks, I would put my head down and slunk past because really, why was I there? It took some time to realize that I was there to better myself and to quit slinking past them.

Then my brother gave me this awesome workout and that would mean I would have to do the unthinkable and go into the free weights section (ohhh scary) But again, I had a goal, I wanted this to work, I was going to kick ass at this and really, since I learned all this years ago, I already knew how to do a lot of these exercises properly (I was one class away from being a certified personal trainer, once upon a time but that’s another story) so guess what, free weights people,even if I didn’t know anything, I still had a right to be there!!

I ignored all the looks at first, and that was fine because these people that were giving me the looks were doing some of the exercises wrong... (Why are you doing the lat pulldown behind your head? why oh why???) but I kept at it. Then I noticed these people, weren’t just giving me looks, they were openly staring at me. Then when i went to do an overhead press one night, they started laughing behind their hands. At first I was like, okay, am i doing it wrong? but no, checked my form and everything, even checked a youtube video to make sure I wasn’t missing anything important just because for some reason I was still a little paranoid, don’t ask me why. So when I went to go do my next set, I noticed them laughing again and one of them whispered something to his friend and pointed at me, not me specifically but my arms. I was wearing a tank top and doing that exercise, my overly fat arms were in plain view for all to see. And they were laughing... then they went off to do lat pulldowns all wrong and making me cringe. I’m sure if they weren’t laughing, i would’ve been nice and have told them why that’s not beneficial:) but I continued on with the workout and as I went on, I was just getting more and more annoyed. I mean, how dare they! What right do they have? What right does anyone have to make fun of anyone because they’re at the gym working out.

So all you Cardio people that were afraid to cross that line, you remember, you’re awesome, you keep working and you forget the looks and whatever else is going on and you step over that line and grab some weights and work your ass off. Don’t be self conscious, don‘t feel like you shouldn’t be there, just go and do it. Remember, you have a right to be there, you have a right to learn some exercises and try them out without being ridiculed because you’re not already at your goal. I mean, why else are you there??? to reach your goal!!!

and if you’re someone who already thinks they’re fit and that people who are overweight or not fit yet don’t belong on ‘your’ side. Quit being a dick, plain and simple. Just quit it. Don’t laugh, be nice, hell even an encouraging smile is nice.

We’re all there for a reason, so keep the judging to yourself.

I must say though, the best part about that whole experience??? Leaving and seeing those same people smoking outside... good one.

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I’m still here!

I’ve been so quiet....

People must’ve thought I’ve given up and gone back to my old ways. Why not? it’s happened before. 

But really, I was sick. There’s this really nasty bug going around up in my part of the world and I fought so hard against it. I put up a valiant effort really but then stress from wrestling as well as stuff happening at home and almost not getting to go on my trip next month pushed me over the edge, that flu took hold and I didn’t know how I was going to get through. I get sick and I’m a big baby about it but I go on through life as normal. I still go to work, I still do what I have to but this hit me and I was down and out. I finally got 3 days off in a row from work so i was all ‘great, I’m gonna hit up Koyabell 2 days this week, maybe squeeze in a double, get lots of food prep done.’ Nope, I woke up briefly, then went back to sleep for pretty much all three days. I went through a whole bottle of nyquil and a pack of benilyn. I had to return to work on Saturday because I had to train and there was no one else to do it and it was a huge mistake. Basically It knocked me down for the last couple weeks and as a result, I haven’t worked out.

It affected me... when I was at the gym and biking, i finally got relief in my knees from the pain. but not going brought the pain back and my god did it hurt, it was like new knee pain all over again. I couldn’t wait to feel better, meaning walk 100m without doubling over and wanting to pass out and being able to stay away for more than 3 hours at a time, so I could go back to the gym as I had a new workout I wanted to try.

My baby bro, (he’ll always be my baby bro) is a Kinesiologist and when I started going to the gym, I knew I needed help. It had been a while and I needed help with lower body exercises, since I was unsure of what would be best with my horrendous knees. So I asked him for some ideas and since he’s so frickin awesome, he went above and beyond and wrote me a whole 2 day split and I was really excited to try it as he did say it would help burn fat and build muscle.

Finally it happened and I got to go back on Friday. so I hopped on the bike and could barely make it 15 minutes. so i figured it was best to give me a couple days to get back in the swing of things before i tackle my new workout. Sunday I felt the energy to give it a try and i did my brother’s workout.

I’m pretty sure he’s trying to kill me. :D In a good way of course. It was tough and painful but I did the whole thing. i finished it off with the bike, tabata style. I researched it first, having never heard of it and it is the most intense thing ever. seriously, look it up. you may think it’s no big deal but go ahead, try it out. i hit 6 rounds. I knew if i did the last 2, I was going to puke and well, I can’t handle puke at all. A few hours later and I already hurt, I’m afraid to sleep, it’s going to hurt when I wake up :( But I will definitely try day 2 on Monday... if I can walk.

While sick, I lost 4 lbs, yay, I am 7 lbs away from my first milestone and I want to do it before my Vegas trip April 11. and I’m really hoping that I hit it. I think with my brother’s new workout I’ll be able to do it. So thanks Iggi :)

I start back at Koyabell on Wednesday and I actually can’t wait :)

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Little Victories

I woke up today and I felt awful mentally. Just awful. I didn't want to get up and go tanning like I planned, I didn't want to get up and prep my food like I should've, I didn't want to get up and go to work. It was a roll over and go back to sleep and not think about anything, kind of day. But I got up. Sure I didn't go tanning, sure I didn't get all my food prepped, then promptly forgot what food I did have, but I made it to work.

When you suffer from depression and have a bad day, that IS a little victory, maybe even a big victory, depending on how you look at it, really.

I made it through work though, completely bored but reading a new magazine I picked up on being gluten free, since I'm still reading about it and trying to understand it. It's what I do. When I was diagnosed with Bi polar and depression, I spent years trying to understand it, why? Because it helps me, it helps me understand certain aspects of it to help myself and that's important. So when I was diagnosed with Celiac's, then yeah, I'm going to try and learn as much as I can. It's amazing how many things have gluten in them that you never even knew about, but I digress.

After work I dressed for the gym though, as I constantly kept telling myself, 'ok, Harmoni, you have to go. You'll feel better, you are so close to reaching your February goal, just go to the gym.' But even as I left my work, I was still trying to make excuses. I was so sure I left my headphones at home so I told myself if I did, I would skip my workout. I can't workout without music. But alas, the headphones were right where I left them, in my purse, so I dragged myself to the gym. I didn't let me talk myself out of it, I didn't listen to my excuses.

Another victory.

Right now, I need cardio, I do, but not like I can hop on a treadmill and run a few miles, not unless I want to fall flat on my face and you know, screw up my knees even more, so I spend a lot of time on the bike as per my doctors suggestion. He said it would help my knees and truthfully, it's done wonders thus far. I haven't had any knee pain for a couple days, which I really noticed today. It's funny, a few short weeks ago, I couldn't last ten minutes on the bike, now I can last 45 minutes and today I hit over 13 miles.

Victory.

For me though, today, the real victory was when I was doing some work on the mats. As everyone knows, I'm all about Koyabell but due to my work schedule, it's hard to fit in the 3 classes a week, so I make it when I can and supplement it by stealing my friends card and going to the gym after work. (I am a night owl and I thrive at night time. So yes, I am the one at the gym at midnight, working my much smaller than 6 weeks ago, butt off) Koyabell is awesome in the fact that when I'm at the gym, I can incorporate a lot of exercises that Coach Rish and his awesome trainers have taught us and keep up with my workouts that way. I do extra cardio because I want to get back into wrestling and well, Cardio's kind of important. So anyways, I'm on the mat, doing a plank, from my toes mind you, and I held that up for 40 seconds, which for me is amazing, considering when I came to Koyabell, I couldn't even do a 30 second plank from my knees, let alone my toes. I decided I needed some push ups and today I wanted to do one, just one from my toes. Anytime we do push ups, they're either wall push ups or from my knees, depending on how my knees feel that day. The truth is, my knees couldn't even hold my legs up to get into push up position, that's how bad and weak they were. I couldn't do a lot of stuff, ie, burpees, squats, planks, pushups. Anything I needed to rely on my legs for, I was useless. I couldn't do it and it was frustrating. You need to understand, my legs have always been my powerhouse. They were strong and powerful and I loved them, and then with two small missteps, they became useless, all because my knees decided they hate me and tore up anything and everything inside them, thank you knees :D So you see, there was a time, a couple months ago, during my koyabell class when I said, hey, let me try a squat and I did 50 of them. they weren't perfect, but they were a start. so I thought, hey, let me try this plank and some days, I can hold it for maybe 10-15 seconds, other days, I have to do it from my knees cuz they're too sore.

I hadn't tried push ups until tonight when I decided I wanted to do one, just one, seeing as I haven't done one from my toes since high school but as Coach Rish has always told us since we started, that if we come to class, if we train, we will be able to do them. I was just excited to do them on my knees since that was even a struggle when I first started. So it was time, time to do my one push up from my toes, just to see if my knees could handle it, just to see if i had the strength, if my hard work this past little while was paying off. So I did it. I did that one push up, from my toes, that I thought would never be possible. And it wasn't that hard. So maybe while I was there in pushup position, I could do another one? that would be amazing right?

So a total of five pushups later, I sat there in complete shock. My body, the one that had betrayed me in so many ways over the past few years had just done something i didn't think was possible. It not only did that one push up i was praying I could do without making an idiot of myself, it did 4 more. 

HUGE VICTORY

I woke up this morning feeling awful, not wanting to get out of bed. I'm going to bed now feeling completely proud of myself. Every little thing I had done today which may not seem like a big deal to most was a victory for me and that's great.

Be happy for your accomplishments, be proud of what you did. You may not think it's much, but it is, it really, really is. It's bringing you one step closer to your goal and every little step is worth a celebration.

[confessionsofthisintrovert]

6 weeks in, taken today. I'm down 14 lbs and feeling great and I don't plan on stopping... Good pouring full body pics up is hard. Follow me on tumblr www.mynewyouhealthtransformation.tumblr.com to watch my journey. #mynewyoujourney #workinghard #postingthesearehard #thankyou #koyabell #glutenfree #6weeksin

[confessionsofthisintrovert]

This is at the beginning, 6 weeks ago. Follow my journey on tumblr. www.mynewyouhealthtransformation.tumblr.com #koyabell #mynewyoujourney #thebeginning

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a quick update before I'm off again...

Oh gosh, I've been trying to write this for days but I have been busty with work (we're short staffed) trying to fit in my workouts and just doing a lot of research so I'm going to keep this short for now and hopefully after work, I can squeeze in an awesome blog as there's a lot i want to go in to. 

Mostly I want to go more in depth with what Coach Rish Koya told us about no MSG and i'm not talking about Chinese food... which is bad but MSG stands for no milk, no sugar and no gluten.

I wouldn't mind talking about having Celiac's and my journey on that.

OR how sad I am that due to my messed up work schedule (two jobs) i can only get to one class of Koyabell Kettlebell right now :( Why is it called Koyabell? Because there is lots of Kettlebell out there but only one Koyabell and you can't beat it.

But until then, drumroll please!!! I am down 12 lbs since starting my journey almost 5 weeks ago. I have more energy and I'm doing a lot more now... case in point, i rearranged EVERYTHING in our cooler at work (I work at a liquor store, so really, not exactly light stuff lol) Since I can't get to class the 3 times a week I should be, I've started using my friends membership to the gym (fit 4 less) which is open 24 hours so i can go there after work. thanks to Koyabell and all I've learned from Coach Rish, I've been able to incorporate a lot. Plus get in some extra cardio so I can get to wrestling again. I told myself I would get to 13 workouts this month (I'm building up) and i'm already half over that, so go me.

So i'll be back soon with lots more to say, Until then,

Just keep swinging ;)

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I'm here now!!!

I've moved to a new home... almost the same url except it has the health in there now... so follow me here on my journey with Koyabell. because koyabell Kettlebell is awesome!!!

I'm reblogging posts from my old url and am gonna be deleting it... that url was connected to my non fitness tumblr and things were getting confusing so i decided just to separate them, so there ya go.