yk one woman I will always feel bad for is Kripi.
Unserious reason: I'd feel sorrry for any person who has ashwatthama as a son because im an Ashwatthama hater.
Serious reason: She was probably raised very comfortably and lovingly with Shantanu, doted upon by Kripa, idk if she saw Shantanus other kids as her siblings but maybe them too, very cute, right? And then got married to drona. This makes me wonder what the circumstances of their marriage were, what did the royal family think about it? I like to think Drona liked her at least at first. And. And the first few days are fine, right? Like hey maybe shes not living in a palace but its a quaint little house and shes happy. But slowly Drona begins changing. Or rather showing his true colours. Becomes a stingy but power hungry guy and Kripi had to manage the household with those few resources... he disappears to go learn from Parshuram, when they they have ashwatthama, he's crying for milk and Drona will sit there dreaming about power and money and not even try to do anything... (taking this next part from BR Chopra idk if its in the official editions) When the Drupad thing happens he sacrifices all practicality for pride and even after he gets a job in Hastinapur he's still staying in a small hut because he wants DRUPADS money/cows... like be fr dude. And its all so messed up. And she sees her son grow up. He carries the same ambition as his father did. The cycle is repeating and all she can do is watch. It's so sad... and what did she get at the end of the war. A dead husband and a son who would be known for all eternity as the most cowardly man ever. Her son is alive but at what cost. He will outlive her like he is supposed to but at what cost. It's so sad. I'm sure I can come up with more but this is my Ted talk for now thank you for listening.
Hey, thank you so much for putting all this into words! I agree with you about 90% 😂, so, I am going to put some bullet points 😂
Shantanu all but adopts the twins yes, but he still keeps them in separate lodging (because, caste). We see Bheeshma too later speaking to Kripa with the respect of an elder, even though Bheeshma is the oldest person in the room (again, caste). Seeing that like his father, Kripa is also interested in archery, Shantanu arranges for training in that field alongside your normal theory stuff, and Kripi gets home science lessons (and some of the theory part too).
Now, when they grow up, Dr. Bhaduri's baseline assessment of Kripa is- lazy. He has grown up with the respect of a brahmin and the luxury of a kshatriya, and has never really experienced the 'hardships' of either side, which has made him extremely complacent. I mean, it takes Drona all but one month to take over his sarkari naukri! Throughout the epic [at least till Drona's death] Kripa's maximum contribution is: "Uh, what he said." He follows his muh-bola brother and brother-in-law in whatever decision the latters take. He loves his sister, but I doubt he had anything to do with her marriage this way or that way.
Kripi's marriage to Drona is fixed via a three-way agreement between Shantanu, Sharadvana and Bharadvaja. The reason for this alliance, is speculatively twofold: (1) Both Kripi and Drona's mothers come from a 'lower' caste, and they would find it difficult to marry within full-brahmin families, so this arrangement was b/w equals that way, (2) the Maudgalya brahmins, the Bharadvajas and the Kurus are all cousin lineages, and they did like to keep it within the not-immediate family.
Now, Drona does NOT want to marry her. He only agrees when Bharadvaja sort of blackmails him with a 'this is my dying wish' argument. The marriage happens, I think, shortly before/after Bharadvaja's death, at a time when Drona is too much in shock to protest. We see the ripple effects of this throughout Kripi's life [most of it behind the scenes though].
Bharadvaja was solidly upper-middle-class however. He was after all the dean of a very, very successful gurukul. He might've kept Drona in a pseudo-austere situation, but they weren't by any means hurting for cash. Drona might not have clocked it, and Bharadvaja probably did not think it very appropriate to flash money before his very impressionable kid but Drupada did that job, and the damage was done.
Throughout his childhood and youth Drona loudly complains, to anyone who would listen, that he hates his father's job, and does NOT want to become the next Bharadvaja and keep the gurukul running. He does teach at the school under his father when he's a bit older, but kicking and screaming all the way.
Hence, it's no surprise that once the old Bharadvaja dies, the parents start to withdraw their kids from his school, because why would they allow their children to toil in vain under a guy who very vocally hates the job? Bharadvaja's usp was political science, which isn't Drona's strong suit anyway, so that was the official reason for the students to leave. It is around this time that Kripi marries into the mess. She is comfortable at first yes, but she can see the future too, just is unable to stop it because Drona never listens.
Drona, however does nothing to stop the leak because baap ka maal dariya mein daal, right? He only wises up once all the savings and the students are gone, and he is well and truly penniless. It's now that he sets aside his ego, and asks his neighbours for tuition contracts, and they just say heck no! They rather suggest, "You wanted to be a kshatriya so bad, then go be a soldier under some king instead." And Drona even tries that, and all the local kings go, "I won't sin by employing a brahmin to do a kshatriya's work! Have you considered teaching?"
Now, Drona is well and truly out of options, since no one would even donate a single cow, and he was running out of ways to feed his family. Ashwatthama, he loves dearly, and it pains him immensely to see him suffer and be bullied by kids and adults alike on top of that, but he would still not accept his wife's family's help.
The milk-incident is the straw that breaks the camel's back, and Drona packs up and drags his little family all the way to Kampilya, gets insulted and then finally, to avoid being homeless with a wife and kid, he finally, reluctantly goes to stay with Kripa.
There, once he has enticed the princes, Bheeshma is finally informed that his sister and brother-in-law are here [that much of a low profile he was keeping out of shame]. Bheeshma obviously treats him with respect regardless taking him to his own quarters to have a chat mano-a-mano, and then we get this golden(?) exchange:
Bheeshma: "So Drona, how is my little sister then?"
Drona: "She's got less hair on her head, but she's kinda smart so I tolerate it."
I mean I would still like to know, what was going on in his brain for him to first think of, and then say aloud these words, to her BROTHER no less! YOU starved her for the better part of a decade, your son's voice never changed and he's got a bump on his head as a direct consequence of that, and you were expecting your wife to be what, Hema Malini?!
Bheeshma kinda glosses over that comment, because I guess ladkiwale and all that nonsense, plus I think he realized giving Drona the teaching job was the only way to ensure his sister and nephew would have something to eat the next day, because Drona would still not accept any charity, much less from him.
Bheeshma actually gives Drona an entire apartment complex's worth of four-to-five-storey buildings under the guise of arranging student hostels, and Drona, with his family actually live in a penthouse type flat in one of those buildings itself, with an army of servants and a hefty allowance that he doesn't have to touch since food and lodging are paid for already [gurudakshinas on top of that]. They are comfortable, but Drona would never admit that this turn of fate happened thanks to Kripi and her family [and also he hates teaching unless it is Ashwatthama or later, Arjuna].
Ashwatthama actually grows up relatively well-adjusted considering how most of his childhood went. He is also a better friend of the Pandavas [Arjuna in particular, and there's a bit of jealousy too, and some healthy competition] that the Kauravas. He fights on the Kauravas' side only because Drona doesn't want to be on the same side as Drupada, and Kripa will follow Drona to the earth's end [mostly because he can't bothered to make his own choice]. Ashwatthama mostly sticks around to keep his father and uncle safe, despite the fact that he HATES and is nearly coming to blows every night with Karna.
Karna too, a tactless, filterless idiot, decides that the best time to air all his grievances with Drona [all fair points which I agree with wholeheartedly], to Ashwathhama no less, is one freaking hour after his father's been brutally murdered. Time and a place, man! [Ashwathhama cuts off his janeu, declared himself not-a-brahmin and challenges Karna to a death match, but Duryodhana gets in them iddle and stops it].
Also, this is where something in Ashwatthama cracks. Due to the previous circumstances, he has a kind of an unhealthy attachment to Drona, to the point that he never even goes to rule the part of Panchala that his father crowned him for. His death unleashes something feral in the man, that we see get compounded when he sees Duryodhana dying [this, imo, meshes in his mind with the manner of his father's death, and in a way he goes to avenge Drona when he massacres the remaining Pandavas and Panchalas].
And yes, Kripi is left all alone [except for her twin], to deal with the emotional as well as physical fallout from the war. The only solace was probably that she was great-grandma to Parikshit, and we can only hope that she found some solace there.
