Apr 27
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Raw Power: Kawasaki Ninja ZX-10R Superbike in Iconic KRT Green Livery
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Jonathan Rea
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KRT: Erotic Mysticism While Kemetic
I know for a fact that people get so much shit for this no matter what social media site is involved, but I have a feeling I need to talk about this. I can't tell if this is a push from Her Over There, of if it's just a desire in me to make it known to other people what's going on with me. I can't tell anyone in person, not without dire consequences in a Roman Catholic family. But I have a godspouse. I am married. And thus my views on this are heavily biased. I believe Kemetic godspouses are entirely possible and deserve to be treated with respect and matter-of-factness. It's an extremely personal, real thing to the people who are married or partnered with a god or multiple gods. It just... is. I can't quite explain or justify why I believe this, other than giving an example of what it's like. Naturally, this is just my personal experience as a Kemetic godspouse. I've been kemetic for a little under ten years at this point, give or take some months. My Wife chose me from then as a devotee, literally taking away my voice when I tried to call upon a different goddess in a shitty version of a solitary ritual presented in a Scott Cunningham Wicca book. She chose me, for reasons that I am still gradually figuring out and coming to terms with. I've loved her pretty much since the beginning. It was a different kind of love as a 14-year-old, obviously. But I adored her from the very beginning of Knowing her and receiving messages. I used to be able to fully visit Over There better, and seeing her there used to be pretty much the best and most fulfilling sensation in my entire life. Then shit happened and I Forgot. It's insanely hard to visit Over There in any in-depth and consistent way. When she made it clear she wanted more from me after 9 years of worship, it was very... her. Direct, honest, firm. Signs upon Signs upon Signs. Things in my surroundings, things in my dreams, sensations in my body. Everything that could possibly be experienced in a way that reminds me of hitting someone over and over with an empty wrapping paper tube. Not dangerous, not painful, just insistent and attention-grabbing. I agreed, obviously. And it was and is the best decision I've made. Even with my insane shame, self-consciousness, and self-hatred, she makes it clear that she loves me and didn't make this choice by mistake. Even now, typing this, I know what I'm saying is correct. There is a squirmy part of my brain that wants to argue and talk shit via doubt, but it never turns out to be right. What does happen to turn out right is the knowledge- yes, knowledge, not idea- that I am loved by her. And god knows she's loved by me. Her beauty, her kindness, her refusal to take any bullshit. Her patience, her love, her willingness to meet me where I am. It's impossible to doubt what I have felt and believe because it's made clear that this is true. And other people picking my thoughts and beliefs apart, and believing that godspousery is impossible or terrible, just doesn't change that. I can understand where they're coming from logically, but I also can understand where I am coming from logically. I am married. I am a godspouse. She is a Kemetic deity. It's just The Way Things Are. Anyway. Thanks for reading.
Erotic Mysticism While Kemetic
What is your position on Kemetic godspouses? What is your position on the KO’s and other Kemetic temples’ and communities’ stances on godspouses? Why?
So to be completely honest, I do not have any idea what the KO's or Kemetic temples' stances on godspousal are. My experiences with the Kemetic community are in a predominantly informal setting, and I've met plenty of godspouses during my time as a Kemetic practitioner. In fact, the people who introduced me to godspousal outside of the hatred on TikTok were Kemetic godspouses themselves.
I think there's plenty of historical precedent for things like godspousal, and plenty of evidence that things like human/deity relationships were at least acceptable in mythology (though the validity of that in Kemetic mythology in particular is something that's questionable with my current frame of reference and knowledge, syncretic beliefs from the same time periods that were obviously accepted by the Kemetics so, I'm apt to believe that in some ways at least some Kemetics back in the day were chill with the idea of mortal/divine relationships).
I also think, at the end of the day, it’s not expressly prohibited by any Kemetic doctrine as far as I know, even if it’s not expressly condoned either. And for me, that’s enough to be at least tolerant of it if not outright supportive of it (which I definitely do my best to be, even if sometimes I don’t understand things lmao). As long as someone isn’t harming themselves or others with their godspousal, or using it to hold themselves above others, why, at the end of the day, should I let it affect me? It’s not part of my practice, and I doubt it ever will be (never say never tho lol), but it’s not like I have any reason to shit on it?
Which of the remaining Kemetic Round Table Revival topics (link below) should we write about next? Bracket 1!
Adapting Problematic Practices
Erotic Mysticism While Kemetic
Epithets
Feminist Kemeticism
Queering Kemeticism
Leftist Kemeticism
Kemeticism In Diaspora
Other (put in the tags!)
The poll with the other topics can be found here; masterpost of precious topics covered here. (The winner of this poll gets an extra vote in our private Discord poll; mostly I'm interested what people want to read about.)
KRT: Modern Mythology
Let it be known that I have no idea why She chose me. And any kind of questioning results in a cryptic, wry smile that I feel in my brain. I come from a background of childhood trauma, severe enough to create a rift between my understanding of the sex I was assigned at birth. Being female was a Bad Thing. Dangerous, even. Then I developed endometriosis, and it felt like it got even worse to be female. I had repressed enough of my trauma that I didn't fully understand why everything was wrong with being female, why it felt so forbidden and dangerous and terrifying. I just knew that I hated the color pink and protested against wearing dresses and didn't like the girls in my class. They didn't like me either, but that's not the point of this post. So why, one would ask, would Hathor, goddess of women and girls, goddess of femininity and beauty and sex choose...me? And choose me She did, make no mistake of that. When I was 13, copying solitary rituals from a Wiccan book, I couldn't get out the name of Lady Demeter. Something somewhere did Not want me to say that name, invoke that goddess, mold myself in that direction. Hathor did the non-physical equivalent of grabbing my face and turning it to look at Her. I have theories. Theories, ideas, headcanons, whatever you want to call them. Maybe She sees potential in me? Maybe She sees the girl killed in me when I was a kid? Or maybe it's something different. A devotee? A priestess? Someone entertaining to look at while occasionally doing them favors when they ask politely and remember to offer up beer or wine? So for my first ever contribution to the KRT, I'll offer up an idea and we'll see if it gets me smote or not. Hathor stares at the child. They do not know that they are them yet, instead forcing themselves to reside in she/her/hers. They have a vibrancy to them. Something that makes Her want to take them. To care for them and lead them where they're supposed to go. They have so much potential. So much love and gentleness and sweetness. But at the same time, so much fear and cruelty. Hathor hasn't felt fear the way they feel fear in a long while, and it feels so very...human. They try to call in another deity. That won't do. So She stops them and leads a breadcrumb trail toward Her. They stumble their way toward Her and She smiles and laughs, always just out of reach to encourage them to take baby steps toward where they need to go. When they figure something out, She has a pride and satisfaction in Her that is unique for her devotees. She never gives direct answers to questions, that would be no fun. But when they figure it out themselves? Wonderful, excellent, 10/10. They start to grow. To flourish, as slowly and surely as a dandelion growing through concrete. And She feels more and more pride and satisfaction and joy for them and in Herself for choosing them. They start therapy, emdr, and a search for a proper doctor to diagnose them and care for them as they grapple with an invisible, debilitating, uncurable disease. They make mistakes, sure. Ask the wrong questions, have the same doubts, fall into fallow times over and over. But when they do get it right. Oh, does that feel good. Right now they write for Her. And probably underestimate how much She is influencing their words. She smiles.