#lateral queerphobia

[sweetpea67]

I wasn’t on here during Ace Discourse (thank goodness) but sometimes I’ll read older posts from that time and a few things stick out to me:

The fact that this website is perpetually searching for a queer demographic that they can oppress and say is actually privileged. Trans without dysphoria, aro, polyam, bi, pan, xenogenders, mogai, enben, intersex, afab transfems, etc. I think right now the main target is trans men and transmascs more generally, but it’s the same old cycle and often the same exact people.

The fact that so many of the aphobes’ “arguments” were literally recycled homophobia: “You’re too young to know.” “Asexuality is nsfw.” “Asexuality is just a phase.” “You just say you’re ace because you think it’s quirky.”

The fact that even after the “discourse” stopped, the perpetrators looked back at it as “that cringy phase I had as a teenager” rather than “that time I bullied hundreds of random queer people for their identities and forced them back into the closet.” There were no apologies.

That literally no aspec person who has been on the Internet since before that time was left untouched, and that the entirety of online aspec culture has been forever altered from this hate wave.

That it was a gateway into radfem circles.

That some people tried to pit aspecs against mspecs because they thought we were opposites but instead mspecs turned out for aspecs a lot harder than many monosexuals ever did.

[itsoktocallmegay]

You know, I’ve seen more people learn about abrosexual and abroromantic lately, but even queer people do not seem to understand just what that can mean for an abro person, especially multigender and genderfluid abrospecs. Like, yes, sometimes I’m a lesbian, and sometimes I’m a gay man. Yes, sometimes I’m omni or pan. And, this is made worse by those who don’t know what the Split Attraction Model is or monos who don’t support it, because sometimes I feel no romantic or sexual attraction (I mostly identify as an angled aroace,) sometimes I’m panromantic and omnisexual, other times I’m panplantonic and switch to omniplatonic. And, sometimes I switch between aspec identities as well, like switching from cupioromantic to demiromantic, or from cupiosexual to apohtiosexual to orchidsexual, or demiplantonic to caedplatonic to orchidplantoic, and so on. Abro literally just means one’s orientation is fluid or changes, and people will say it’s a valid label and then turn around and call other labels abrospec people use invalid. I’m so tired of making my abro and genderfluid identity more palatable to others.

[sweetpea67]

It will also never cease to fascinate me that back during discourse days gatekeepers kept mocking aspecs for being prudes who can’t stand Real Sexual Gay People and “some of them want LGBT cafes & bookstores, how homophobic is that”. And then barely five seconds after the aspec community was fucking beaten into the ground those bigots just turned around and went “kink doesn’t belong at Pride! sex is gross!” with no shred of irony.

[sweetpea67]

I’m starting to notice that a lot of queer Catholic dissenters (not gonna name any names, just a trend I’ve seen) seem very susceptible to hidden varieties of reactionary movements regarding sex, I think because we’re already in such a precarious position in faith circles so it’s VERY common to use anything we can to try and get TradCaths to like us. Which can lead to respectability politics a lot of the time. And a lot of other bad stuff.

[dyslexic-asexual]

Nobody should be forced to out themselves to be deserving of your supposed morals.