#leanne 5000

[obigem]

Leisure?"

"Yes. When you're not tending to Mr. Fletcher, what is it that you do that's just for you?"

"I read."

"And?"

"I chat with Ms. Cordelia."

"And?"

"I tend to young Andros."

"Very well, but what do you do that's just for you?"

"I don't think I understand."

"While I'm not tending to Valerian I like to knit. I also enjoy ensuring Mr. Chinsley knows exactly his place, the amusement he brings Valerian notwithstanding. Now what do you enjoy?"

"Being….efficient?"

Leanne sighed. "It's no wonder you're suddenly 'feeling.'"

"So I am defective." Alphie mused in dejectedness.

"Not defective. Just boring. But I've got an idea. We'll refresh your perspective. Where did Mr. Fletcher set you change of clothes and wigs?"

Alphie blinked blankly.

"You don't mean to tell me you're always in….that?"

"Is this outfit not satisfactory?"

"It's white."

"White is versatile."

"Yes…C01 would you like to go shopping?"

"For supplies?"

"For clothes. I think it will help you feel more like yourself. It'll be my treat."

"Oh. That sounds fulfilling."

"Yes. Now for transportation"

"C01, do you think Mr. Fletcher will allow us use of his vehicle?"

"The Leaf? No, I don't believe so. He has a strange preoccupation with it."

"How unfortunate. No worries, the helicopter it is. Though we must bring along young Sunny. She simply cannot be left behind."

"Oh, well then in that case, I should bring along Ms. Cordelia. It is also unwise to leave her to her own devices."

"Of course. I'll just let Valerian know that we'll be out and we'll be on our way."

So the plan was set. A shopping trip was just the right presciption.

[theplottdump]

🍂🍁

[theplottdump]

Before an attempt could be made to pull the man in closer for a kiss, finalizing the moment, Val had sprung back with a newfound energy and vigor, addressing the house AI directly.

"HANSEL please inform Leanne that her presence is requested immediately."

"You called?" "FUCKMEwheredidyoucomefrom-" Chad exploded - nearly jumping out of his skin details. Leanne instantaneously materializing behind him like some sort of electronic ghost.

“Yes, thank you Leanne.” Valerian replied coolly, unfazed by her rapid appearance. “Mr. Chinsley has just informed me that he wishes to resume the nuptial process.” “Very good sir, shall we begin with the vows then?” Chad hurriedly cut them both off.

“What!? Not RIGHT NOW!”

Val studied his partner quizzically. “Correct me if I'm mistaken, but did you not just directly express to me you’d like to finalize our long delayed marriage?”

“But- there’s a whole process! Paperwork to file, things to plan!” Chad shot back, visibly confused at how the moment had devolved so rapidly.

“Correct. Vexus has kept the documents on retainer until he received final confirmation from Party B- that would be you Mr. Chinsley.”

The cogs began to turn in the back of Chad's cerebral cortex.

“You’ve had the documents… filed.” “Yes sir.” “For how long exactly?” “Ten Years, Two Seasons, Twelve Days, Sixteen Hours, Thirty-Six minutes, and 12, 13, 14, 15 seconds. We’ve had to re-file after every patch.”

Chad slowly swiveled back to meet Val’s steel coated irises. “You're psychotic.”

“Thank you for noticing Agent.” Val raised his eyebrows, amused at the compliment. “Now, shall we continue? Leanne please pull up the vows on file. Draft D6 Please.” “Right away sir.”

The supervillain readjusted his gaze to that of his partner, confidence dropping slightly as he finally paused to study Chad’s reaction.

“You're upset.”

“Valerian, tell me truthfully - when I asked you to marry me, did you think I meant right this exact moment?”

“Well obviously,” the villain replied plainly, “But if you wish to include Helianthus in the process, I can have HANSEL wake her up and send her down-”

Chad cut him off, moving forward slightly to place a hand on either side of the man- steadying him for the words he would say next.

“Valerian, I want a wedding.”

A heavy anticipatory silence that fell over the room, as the Agent waited for a response from his fiancé.

“Oh.”

[theplottdump]

While his sisters sorted out the developing mystery that their older brother had suddenly become, life on the other side of town continued on relatively unbothered.

Doctor Simcraft: I really don't see the appeal in it at all. All these experiments with Generative Models. From what I've seen the results are positively garish. Shooby: A-EYE successfully generates one ugly cat, and now they're trying to upend an entire industry with an army of 3D printed Runway Models?

Vexus: Doubtful. The cost of biomass scrapped due to malformities cannot be sustainable in the long run. Even with their patron backing.

Too many fingers, extra legs, missing arms - the usual. Even the successful ones rarely last more than a few days before internally collapsing.

Simcraft: It's like no one respects the value of unethical labor anymore. This whole artificial intelligence scheme is sloppy, homogenized, and short sighted. Shooby: No offense Leanne.

Leanne: None taken.

Simcraft: Did you hear what happened with the Curator's Assistant? Shooby: The one that defected? He's still alive? Simcraft: I hope not - he's been handling all my taxes for years.

Vexus: What's this now?

Simcraft: Big Neighborhood stories scandal. Cheated on by 009 - that little annoying one from the Del Sol Office.

Shooby: Really? Good gossip takes so much longer to reach Sixam. Didn't she lock him in one of your vaults years ago? Simcraft: Ugh don't remind me.

Vexus: Interesting.

[ LIGHT COUGH ]

Shooby: Oh Shit. That's too funny.

Alejandro: Maybe I come back later.

Carmela: [ LIGHT SIGH ]

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[theplottdump]

Leanne: Can I help you sir? Valerian: Leanne what are you - Step aside.

I wish to speak with Helianthus. (🎵)

Leanne: Miss Sunny is not accepting visitors at this time. I'm afraid you'll have to come back later.

Val: You're being ridiculous. Leanne: Am I? Really? I don't quite remember you programming me with that particular subroutine.

Val: Leanne - please.

Don't make me order you to let me through. I just want to talk to her.

Leanne: Be gentle.

[theplottdump]

Val: I hope you're pleased with yourself. Poppy: What did someone get a second thrashing last night? Val: How did you - we had a civil conversation. Poppy: Is that what they're calling it now?

Val: Look - I'm not happy about this - Poppy: Unsurprising. Val: Would you just- for one minute, stop being such a bitch and let me finish? This is already difficult enough as is.

Poppy: One Year. Val: What?

Poppy: That is how much time I'm giving you to deal with your shit.

Poppy: I'll cover for Chad, for Sunny, and I'll even keep covering your dumb ass. But one year from now, if you haven't already told her - I will. It's your Legacy Val. Not mine. Those are my terms.

Val: I suppose that's more than fair. Poppy: Look, being a bitch isn't a two way street. It's like a narrow alley, and as much as I enjoy fighting you in it, eventually we're both gonna have to move on.

Poppy: Now you go. Val: Next time you visit, please don't do any U.N.I.T. work in my home. It makes me feel dirty. Poppy: Keep spying on me and I'll rip your stupid surveillance system out of the walls.

Val: Timebomb. Poppy: Freak.

[theplottdump]

Sunny has been incessant since learning of her Aunt's impending arrival.

And while they have spoken on several occasions without my approval or consent through Chad's video screen, this will mark her first time making contact with someone outside the immediate family.

Even Leanne and HANSEL agreed that controlled exposure to a """positive female presence""" - and it is to be noted that I put this so deeply in quotations that I trust the meaning will get lost completely - would be an overall good experience for her development.

My partner I expected this from, yes. In truth, I was more surprised it took this many years to re-introduce the idea at all.

But my Servo and integrated AI turning against me?

It's one thing to be betrayed by the people you hold dear.

It's another entirely when your own house turns against you.

Even if I could trust Poppy as far as I can throw her, (4-5 feet if I stretch) I don't believe I could ever feel fully comfortable with another person invading this sanctum, putting everything I hold dear at risk.

But once again - I've been outvoted.

[theplottdump]

FROM: Pops TO: Chad

( 1 New Text Message )

I lived bitch.

I made it through my first Harvestfest in Sulani. ( 🎵 ) I feel like I have to write this all down somewhere cause the whole thing feels too crazy. I probably shouldn't be writing this at all - but if anyone breaks into my phone I'll have much bigger problems on my hands.

I finally got to meet little Sunion. I started calling that when she refused to go to bed after the house tour. I said she was being preeeetty stinky, like an onion.

Chad thought it was pretty good, and of course Val doesn't have a single humorous bone in his whole creepy body.

I still can't believe he built a Servo that looks exactly like out old Nanny. It gives me full body heebies just thinking about it. I almost had a heart attack when undead proto-Leanne picked me up from the airport yesterday.

She's nice enough but the whole thing - it's straight up wrong.

I emailed Ale last night that I was heading home early. It's so hard to get any texts through here. But now he wants to spend the rest of the holiday break with me.

I told him I’m fine, but he’s been so sweet babysitting Cat for me I don't think I can get away with kicking him out of my apartment.

I desperately need space to think. Chad told me I should make my own choices, which sounds fucking terrifying honestly. Like, what's the point of being unplayed then?

Thanks for nothing loser.

Now I'm going to be on edge all weekend, getting jumpscared every time my boyfriend ties his shoes.

I really don't know what to do. I wish I did. I guess I'll just have to figure it out when I get there.

All in all, not a terrible trip. It was nice to get more than just a few hours of gossip time with Chad.

Even arguing with Val felt - almost cathartic? Like it was nice to see my brother again. My actual brother, not the foppish supervillain persona he hides behind.

And Sunny? That little girl is going to take on the whole world someday, I just know it.

And I for one can't wait to see it.

FROM: Pops TO: Chad

( 1 New Text Message )

Hey Chad. Sorry to spook you with this, but you told me you'd been collecting notes and journals from Sunny’s childhood. Thought she might appreciate this one I found buried in Poppy’s notes app. I'll let you know if I find any more. - A