FTM
Disgust with being labeled as a manly girl/lesbian/butch/dyke?
Yeah, it’s pretty darn present for me. I’ve always felt like I didn’t quite fit into the lesbian community. In fact, not really at all. I always wondered what could possibly be wrong. After all, coming out as gay was supposed to be the solution that would invite me whole-heartedly into the lesbian community.
Nope. I’ve always felt like an outsider, whether dabbling in straight or gay communities.
It wasn’t until now that I realized, what if it’s that I truly feel like a guy, and a guy who was wrongly pushed into the lesbian community?
Wishing to be a straight guy who dates only straight girls seems like a pointless goal, being that I’m too scared to get an actual sex change. There’s also the sad truth that only I and a few other transgenders seem to be able to admit- straight girls don’t want FTM people, they want organically born males. It is this truth that for me, renders a sex change pointless. Getting a sex change and then being denied access to the straight community as well as now the lesbian community would be almost more depressing than just sticking to my assigned gender.
Am I writing for nothing, or does anyone else experience my pain?
