#lifeitis

[lifeitis]

And Today..i realized actually but i realize this everytime..that people don't generally accept female authority so easily at their workplaces...they either think that a girl is compromising for money if she is successful and not her hardwork.....weird i suppose...working with one of the finest bank of Asia its weird

[juanpaowers-blog]

Pain Au Shoulder Pose! forget what happen. carry on the burden. continue living. stay positive even if you're faking. aja! 🤓😉😊☺💪🖒👊 #forget #carryon #continue #stay #lifeitis #life (at Desert Charm, Al Barsha 1)

[tipanee25-blog]

No matter how long and bumpy the road you take, it will always lead you somewhere worth it.☝ #Aldesa #lifeitis #explorefurther #thankGod

[thelostbella]

Hi everyone, I do exist x

Do you ever experience being left out in a group? Or we can say,everybody around just make you feel worthless? Hindi nga ata nila napapansin yung existence ko. Ha ha ha. Well, siguro nga ganun talaga, but the worst part is, you can’t do anything about it but to accept the fact na ganun talaga. Go with the flow nalang ba, ganun.

That’s my everyday experience sa totoo lang. Siguro nung mga nakaraang araw, ayoko lang talagang aminin or tanggapin sa sarili ko na ganun na nga yung nangyayari. I remember back then before the 1st semester of 1st year college, sinabi ko talaga sa sarili ko na “Ama, wag na wag kang maattach pag college. Dapat matuto maing independent.” People come and go, that’s the reality. And siguro yun din talaga yung exact reason kung bakit ayoko makipagfriends masyado sa college. Because of my fear of being left behind. Or maiwan/iwinan ulit. Okay na ko sa GP, sobrang enough na sila for me. 

Pero syempre, hindi mo rin talaga mapipigilan yung mga taong dadating sa buhay mo sa college. And nangyari na nga, kahit takot ako noon, nag - go ako. Kasi medyo naisip ko din na wala rin naman akong mapapala kapag mag isa lang ako buong college, lalo na mahirap yung course mo. Syempre, ayoko namang mag isa lang dibdibin yun diba. Hahaha. 

Until you two came into my life. (Hi Christine and Michelle! :)) College buddies kung maituturing. Kahit sobrang hyper natin most of the time (dati), okay lang kasi parang sisters na din. Nakatira kayo sa iisang dorm, kumakain ng sabay sabay, mula umaga hanggang gabi mukha nila yung makikita mo. HAHAHA. Pero okay lang, sabi nga ng marami, “Triplets” na daw kami. Lol hahaha.

Kaso habang tumatagal, nangyayari na yung kinatatakutan ko before. People change. At kahit gaano mo itanggi sa sarili mo, wala e, ganun talaga. Unti unti na silang nawawala sayo. Hindi naman ako selfish, if they want to talk or befriends with anybody, go lang. Hindi naman bawal yun. So elem naman kasi nun. Lol. Kaso nga lang, ang masakit na part dun, parang wala ka nalang sakanila. Para ka nalang isang malamig na hangin na padaan daan nalang, nagpaparamdam. It effin hurts. Para kang t*nga na humihingi ng atensyon at kulang nalang sabihin mo sakanila na “Guys, nag eexist pa ako o, pansinin niyo naman ako.” Para kang buhay pero patay sa pakiramdam nila. 

I used to smile everytime. Yung parang okay lang lahat, normal lang. Pero deep inside, parang nadudurog yung puso mo. Yung feeling na pinipilit mong maging masaya na makita silang masaya yun nga lang, hindi ka na kasama dun. Kasi may iba na silang kasama. Yung harap harapan ka nang ipinagtatabuyan kasi kasama niya na yung “squad” niya. Yung isa naman, magkasama nga kayo pero sobrang left out ka, kasi may pinaguusapan sila nung “new buddy” niya. Malay ko ba kung sino yang sese na yan. Jusko. And then out of sudden, nararamdaman konh maiisip nila na anong problem ko? na bakit ang tahimik ko, or baka isipin nilang nagbago na ako. Eh anong magagawa ko? Kung ang tanging pagtahimik nalang yung best way na pwede mong gawin. No choice ka din naman. Its either matulog ka nalang, or to remain silent. Hay. Life. 

But still, life is like river. Tuloy pa din ang agos. Papalipasin ko muna siguro tong sama ng loob. I wish I have the guts to tell them everything I feel. Tao din naman kasi ako. May pakiramdam, nasasaktan din. Yun nga lang, hindi ko navovoice out. For the same reason, kasi takot ako. 

Haaaay. Lord, please help me overcome my fear. And please help me not to cry again po. Okay na po yung kagabi. I know, you have a purpose naman po e. Yes, people do come and go. Pero ikaw po, anjan ka lang lagi. At alam ko pong hindi mo ako iiwan! :) I love you so much, the one! :*

And to the both of you, Tine and Mich, if ever man mabasa niyo to, uhm, wala lang. Masaya ako atleast alam niyo na. Just wanna say that, I love you both and I miss you so much! :( Haay. 

2nd year is no good.

xo,

Amabelle.

[leparismidst-blog]

I'M SO DEPRESSED RIGHT NOW THAT I'M WRITING A REAL HEAP OF WORDS (i have done three rants now)