#like... yikes

[the-dreadful-bard]

I'm writing this just to get it off my chest.

This week was a lot. I turned 27 last Tuesday, which I wasn't looking forward to. I'm not where I wanted to be in life, I'm unsatisfied and unhappy with a lot of things in my personal life, professionally, relationship-wise, just a lot of things. To make it a little worse, half of my friends wouldn't be able to see me on the 11th so I had dinner with three of them on my birthday, and then scheduled to meet up with everyone on Saturday for the real celebration.

Except, this is the first time I've ever had a birthday without my childhood best friend because I cut him off last December after a really bad situation that made me not want to have him in my life anymore. Either way, it was going to be different, which I don't always deal easily with bc of my autism. Well, I needed a win. It had to go well.

But my best friend of ten fucking years texted me when I was on my way to the restaurant saying he wasn't gonna make it. I was obviously upset. In his text, he said I shouldn't be upset. That made me more upset :) I don't like it when people try to tell me what I should or shouldn't feel, it makes me angry. So I ignored the rest of his texts. I scheduled today around his fucking time, bc it was fundamental to me that he showed, and he knew it. I did everything I could to make sure he was going to show up. And yet... He didn't. That made me very unhappy.

When my cousin, her golden retriever of a boyfriend, and I arrived at the restaurant, we found out there was gonna be at least an hour long wait bc I had trusted my stupid fucking best friend who had told me we didn't need to make a reservation. We had to walk for a bit and found a pizzeria to kill some time, I was starving bc all I had in my stomach was a cappuccino from five hours earlier.

My other friend arrived and when we sat down at the pizzeria I almost had a meltdown because I couldn't believe how everything was just... Not going according to my plans. Luckily, he's the dad friend of my group and knew to distract me with a joke before I could start crying in a public place.

My last friend showed up a little after that, and we ate some okay pizza and it was fine. The conversation was nice. But yeah, just not what I was hoping and planning for.

When we finished eating, we went back to the other spot, as it was a board game restaurant and what we were really looking forward to was playing some games. Still had to wait a bit. They put us on the second floor and... it was smoky af and there were no windows. Hello??? Now that I'm home, my hair smells like fried food. There were at least 4 children yelling, and the adults were being incredibly loud too. Thank God I was wearing my loops cuz I was going to die if I weren't.

Our eyes were burning the entire time, which... wtf is wrong with this place and how is it allowed to exist in its current conditions??? There were like, maybe 3 employees in the entire place and it was two fucking stories!! My friend asked for a milkshake and had to wait for at least 50 minutes to get it.

Anyway, we played the game I chose, Reign of Cthulhu, very poorly because my eyes were burning so much I couldn't focus on reading the instructions. We lost. We did well, considering how we fucked up the preparation of the game, but we obviously, as I knew we would, lost. That's fine. It was still fun.

I'm okay, I had a nice time and I enjoyed being around some of the people I love, but I was definitely disappointed and my best friend's absence was noticeable. My other friend, the one I cut off, wasn't missed, but it was different not having him there. I'm just tired and I'm glad I didn't have a meltdown but yeah. Just another mediocre birthday like every single one I've ever had.

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

Whumpay Day 6: "what did they do to you?"

during Our Town | @today-in-fic, @whumpay2022

"Are you okay?" Mulder asks, and Scully almost just says yes out of instinct, because it's what she always does. For him, she's always fine. But when he carefully pulls the duct tape from her mouth and helps her stand up, she's hit with a sudden wave of dizziness that nearly makes her lose her tentative balance.

All she can do is look back down at her hands, still bound together, and lift them a little bit. "Get this off of me, please," she whispers.

He fumbles to untie her hands, and she tries not to think of the last time something like this happened. She wasn't as dizzy, then, after Pfaster, but she'd been far more shaken. She's grateful for the ability to hold herself together this time, but at the same time there's a part of her that still wants to feel protected in Mulder's arms.

"What did they do to you?" He asks, catching her drifting attention again. She's staring at the dead man on the ground, but not really seeing him. She looks up at Mulder a little too quickly and wishes she hadn't, because she has to reach out and grab onto him when the dizziness hits her again.

She takes a deep breath and steadies herself. "Just knocked me out and brought me here," she replies. "I'm- I think I have a concussion," she adds, matching up her current symptoms with what she knows happened. "I'm dizzy." Her voice sounds very small to her ears, like a plea for help, but if she seems especially vulnerable, Mulder doesn't let it show.

He just nods, keeps a hand on her arm, keeps her steady and grounded and knocks the mask off of the man who had been about to kill her with his foot. Scully isn't sure whether the added dizziness is just a symptom of being hit on the head, or from shock at seeing the staring face of the sheriff under the mask. She looks at Mulder, who looks at her with equal shock, and steps closer to wrap his arm around her shoulders.

"Think you can make it to the car?" He asks, pointing to where his headlights shine over through the low bushes. "I called the deputy, he should be here with backup and hopefully an ambulance any minute."

Scully leans into his side and tries not to stumble too much, but the ground is just uneven enough and her eyes aren't focusing enough to keep her from tripping. The wobbly, dizzy feeling has grown past her shock into a pounding headache by the time they reach the car and she sits down in the passenger seat. Mulder crouches in front of her, peering up into her face, and she tries to assure him that she's alright, but the fact of the matter is that she's not.

The deputy sheriff does bring an ambulance, but the paramedic just checks her over sitting right there in the car while Mulder confers with the deputy.

"Only sleep for two hour increments," says the medic, and Scully barely stops herself before she nods. "No painkillers at first, but by tomorrow that should be alright. And," she adds, "You're not going to be alone, are you?"

Mulder interjects, then, "No, she won't be."

"Thank you," Scully mumbles, directed both at the nodding paramedic and at Mulder.

When they finally escape the shadows of the raging bonfire and crime scene activity, they drive for an hour before pulling into a hotel with rooms open. Scully is only too dizzy to walk for a few moments after standing up out of the car, but she waves Mulder off when he tries to support her again. She needs to stand on her own strength. Even still, she lets him book just one room for the night, and she slips into the bed beside him after making him promise to wake her up, and considering everything that's just happened, she feels surprisingly safe with him beside her.

[lettuce-gremlin]

oc enneagram test

I was tagged by @awful-roffle to do this enneagram test (Thank you!), so I did it for my character Adina! I tag... anyone who wants to do it tbh, I’m never sure who to tag for these

Anyway! Here we go!

Adina - Type 8 - The Challenger

“Eights attempt to master the world by being strong. They like to solve problems through sheer willpower and have no problem with confrontation. Eights are people with high levels of energy, intensity and willpower. They project power and toughness and take challenges as an invitation to prove their strength. They enjoy open confrontation and don’t back down easily.Eights often have a fierce passion to protect the vulnerable and weak, but they have trouble admitting any kind of weakness or vulnerability themselves.”

Strengths:

- Care about truth and justice and are willing to protect the weak

- Are confident in their decision-making skills

- Don’t worry what people think of them

- Have a charismatic knack for leadership

- Are fearless and inspire others to overcome their fears

Motivations:

“Eights want to feel strong and in control so they can protect themselves and those they love.”

 What’s often holding them back:

“Eights (unconsciously) believe that the world is a place where only the strong survive. Deeply afraid of being powerless and weak, of being manipulated and taken advantage of, Eights build up a tough exterior that promises them to make them invulnerable against any threat.“

[polyaubergine]

....i finally understand mara as a villain and i regret understanding mara as a villain

[mocha--cat]

Opens tiktok

Immediately sees a video of someone defending Travis Scott saying "why do people care about people they don't know"

Closes TikTok

[edeldoro]

Watching the thread on Qrow and Winter wrt police violence pass between white fans as a person of color is certainly Something

[allthatdivides]

*slaps middle school me* this baby can fit so many undiagnosed mental issues in it

[mhaccunoval]

we love being haunted by an inability to be a good friend