was tempted to ask abou a discord server for punch out fans but like.. idk but everyone mentions theres weekly drama and i have NO IDEA WHATS GOIN ON. why we beef
we so niche why we so mad tf. unless they like crazy disgusting idfk
Christmas headcannons for the Punch Out!! Wii boxers!! 🥊🎄✨️
(cover by me :p)
They're all having a christmas party/sleepover together, there's a big Christmas tree in the gym, and their doing Secret Santa :3
Glass Joe 🇫🇷 🥐
- Made most of the food for the Xmas party. He baked bundt cakes, sugar cookies, peppermint brittle, buche de noel, and little gingerbread men he decorated to look like the boxers. Bro literally baked his German bf into a cookie because he misses him-
- The ref gifted ugly Christmas sweaters to all the boxers. Joe got an oversized blue and white jack frost themed one. He actually loved it and is keeping it
- Got berated by Aran throwing snowballs at him on his way to the party
- Overly invested in Kaiser retelling Christmas stories
- Over drank hot chocolate and passed out around 10pm. Later woke up under the tree, wrapped in wrapping paper and with several gift boys in his hair. Shockingly, it wasn't Aran who did this-
- Received his secret Santa gift from Kaiser. It was a makeshift lightweight belt Kaiser had crafted himself. Joe cried for 20 minutes straight after receiving it
- His new year resolution is to win more fights
Von Kaiser 🇩🇪🔩
- Had amazing childhood Christmas's as a child (at least the ones with just his mom) and will happily hyperfixate and info dump about them
- Taught Joe how to make fresh gingerbread (Lebkuchen)
- Recieved lots of cute, hand-made christmas cards from his boxing class. Almost cried reading them since they all praised him as a boxing teacher
- Traumatized most of the boxers after he told lore-dropped about Krampus.
- His ugly Christmas sweater was itchy and had bells on it. It quickly got on his nerves, and he later got rid of it... not before taking the bells off though. Spare parts are spare parts!
- Did most of the decorating around the gym and policed anyone who wanted to help decorate the tree. Clearly, he's an expert
- Received his secret santa gift from Bald Bull. He got this adorable "build it yourself" cuckoo clock set and absolutely adored it. (Extra hc that Bald Bull knows wayyy too much about the boxers' personal lives bc he's so quiet and listens in on their secretive conversations).
- His new year resolution was to practice self love more
- Around midnight, when the snow slowed down, he took Joe outside for a little private slow dance behind the gym, out in the snow... they kissed by the end of the hour, by the end of their slow dance ❤️
Disco Kid 🇺🇲 🕺
- "I 👁jUsT wAnT🤲 yOu🫵 FoR 4️⃣mY oWn🤲, MoRe ➕️ThAn YoU 🫵cOuLd EvEr KnOw🧠, MaKe🔨 My WiSh✨️ CoMe TrOoOoO✅️... aLl I wAnT🤲 fOr 4️⃣ChRiStMaS🎄 iS yOuUuU🫵" ....all. night. long. With Aran too.
- Got a cute reindeer sweater from the ref, and wore it all night. Got sad when Kaiser threw out his own sweater.
- Has an entire, 100+ song playlist he made for the party. About 10 of the songs on it were remixes of that one Mariah Carey one he loves so much
- Danced with Aran all-night long, despite Arans lack of rhythm. Got giggly af when Aran kissed him.
- Took a picture of Joe wrapped under the tree. It's now the official WVBA Christmas card.
- Accidentally burnt his tongue drinking the hot chocolate Hondo brought
- Kept in contact with Hondo, Aran, and Tiger as they stole Flamenco out of Brooklyn Heights. Acted as the "mission control" of the Flamenco heist situation
- Recieved his secret santa gift from King Hippo. It was a necklace made of pearls, that were decorated to look like little disco balls. He loved it, weared it all night long... and thanked King Hippo with a big ole hug.
- His new years resolution is to take his career as a boxer a little bit more seriously
King Hippo 🏝 🦛
- Hates the cold sm, he's napping by the heater 90% of the time
- Hondo was nice enough to supply the king with extra hot cocoa
- His sweater sadly didn't fit him
- Loudest teeth chattering in the world
- The boxers who got rid of their sweaters gave them to Hippo for him to use as a blanket... plus the warm hug Hippo got from Disco Kid.
- "I want a hippopotamus for Christmas" is considered an offensive song to him and his kin. Disco Kid nearly lost an arm before promptly removing the song from his holiday playlist.
- Recieved his secret santa gift from Soda Popinski. He got a little Hippo plushie! He stimmed and roared a lot from it, so the boxers assumed he was happy. The plushie was pineapple scented too, so it reminded him of home.
- Doesn't know what a new years resolution is, and he didn't make one.
Piston Hondo 🇯🇵🍣
- Cooked most of the non-baked foods for the party, including freshly made hot chocolates... fanciest hot chocolates ever made.
- Gave up his cute penguin sweater to Hippo, despite actually liking the sweater
- Was the designated driver during the "Flamenco Heist" mission... which is good, since none of the other participants could drive that quietly.
- Got pulled over for speeding out of Brooklyn Heights... buuut after getting the ticket and trying to get Aran to stop cursing at the policeman, he eventually transports Don and the boys safely to the party.
- Crashed out under the tree after the heist.
- (Before the heist) recieved his secret santa gift from Glass Joe. He got a cute pusheen cat mug and a christmas card with a handwritten Haiku in it, about what a great friend Hondo is. Needless to say, Hondo was very grateful.
- His new years resolution list is loooong... stuff like "lose weight" and "focus on social life" and "be less selfish"... basically a lot of insecurities he secretly has.
Bear Hugger 🇨🇦🐻
- Got a large tree, fresh from the woods (AND replanted it, because deforestation is bad ✨️)
- Spruce didn't attend the party bc he was hibernating
- Bear recieved a polar bear sweater that was way too small on him, which sucked because he liked it. After Hippo was done using the unused sweaters as a blanket, Bear would later give his sweater to Lomasi, even if it's way too big for her. She loves it though
- Ate most of the food and stole some leftovers for Spruce and Lomasi to snack on. The sugar made him stay up all night
- Wayyyy too invested in the whole Flameco heist story
- Around 3am, he left the party and got his woodland animal friends to steal the remnants of Don's torn coat from a local dump, and he got them all to repair it. Don would be gifted it back on Christmas morning, much to Carmen's shock and surprise.
- Recieved his secret santa gift from Super Macho Man. He got two gifts, an adult bib that pointed to his mouth and read "CPDS: Canada's Pancake Disposal System." and Spruce recieved adorable squirrel sized swimming wings (made by Kaiser, gifted by Macho Man).
- His new years resolution is single handedly stop humans and corporations from hurting the environment.
Great Tiger 🇮🇳🐅
- Typically doesn't celebrate Christmas, but is gonna do so this year just to spend time with his friends and to participate in secret santa. (It's a personal choice if Sikh individuals wish to celebrate Christmas or not, according to my research before writing this).
- Absolutely LOVED his corny ahh ugly Christmas cat sweater, wore it during the Flamenco heist situation
- Re-inacted some of Kaisers' christmas stories using his clones
- When Hondo arrived at Carmen's house that evening, Tiger was in charge of distracting Carmen and her family while Aran snuck Don out of the top window. He and his clones did a (technical) one-man caroling mini spectacular, complete with dancing and a short rap session. Ofc Tiger had to he over the top with it
- Screamed like a girl when Aran gifted him a fake dead rat... luckily, Hondo said "Aran, you shouldn't hurt your own kind" after Aran bursted out laughing
- His new years resolution is to be more self sufficient and depend on his magic less
Don Flamenco 🇪🇸 🥀
- His parents from Spain sent him this gorgeous, satin winter coat with a cute little card. They love him very much, despite how little contact Don has with them (due to Carmen ofc)
- Bro had an entire Cinderella arc. Basically, Don wanted to go to the WVBA Christmas party, but Carmen wanted him to stay home and spend the night with her... even though he's been cooped up at her home since mid-December. She says stuff like "I matter more" and "They're better off without you," using such language to gaslight and manipulate Don into staying with her.
- They got into a fight about it, which resulted in Carmen not only tearing up his new winter coat Don's family from Spain had sent him a few days ago... but she also locks him in her room that night until he "becomes a better boyfriend."
- This pushed him over the edge, and he called out to Disco Kid for help! Luckily, Aran, Hondo and Tiger were able to "kidnap" him away from Carmen's place, and Don was able to spend half the night at the party
- Pretended to like his elf christmas sweater so as not to hurt the refs feelings.
- Also wore it because he hates the cold
- Taking selfies along with Macho Man, without thinking that Carmen might see them and know where he was. Thankfully, Carmen didn't.
- Recieved his secret santa present from Great Tiger. He got an expensive skin care kit that he vows to use daily.
- His new years resolution is to "be a stronger boyfriend" for Carmen.
- Snuck back into Carmen's home around 6am and fell asleep on the couch. Was overjoyed the next morning to see his new coat repaired.
Aran Ryan 🇮🇪 😈
- Tries to dance with Disco Kid to the Christmas tunes, but he's got no rhythm, so it looked kinda awkward but cute at the same time.
- Just so happened to be dancing under a mistletoe a certain German precariously placed for a certain French... but only he noticed.
- Quickly kissed Disco Kid before gesturing to the mistletoe.
- Agreed to help save Don's christmas only because he wanted to break into Carmen's home, plus he has experience climbing up to second floors from the outside.... don't ask how.
- Once he broke in, he promptly placed a spare fake dead rat into Carmen's stocking (that was conveniently in her room) before safely carrying Don out of the window
- Threatened to drop Don multiple times if he didn't shut up about the cold... thankfully, Don was okay.
- Recieved his secret santa gift from Bear Hugger. He got A LUMP OF COAL. He nearly destroyed everything in that gym until he looked deeper into the gift bag... and also saw he got a new leather jacket with a badass Irish blessing on the back of it. Bear laughed his ass off at Arans initial reaction
- Didn't say it out loud, but his new years resolution was to be a better behaved human of society... at least for Disco Kid's sake.
Soda Popinski 🇷🇺🍾
- Casually walked to the gym out in the cold wearing a christmas tank top and apple bottom jeans.
- "Soda it's fucking 21 degrees out"
- "And?"
- Liked his snowman sweater, it was super cute to him. He and Macho Man did sweater selfies together
- Chugging eggnog because no one else wants to drink it. The sugar he got also made him stay up all night
- Got scared by Kaisers krampus story and had nightmares until new years
- Started a snowball fight with Aran early on during the party, which Joe unfortunately became a part of
- Recieved his secret santa gift from Don when he eventually arrived at the party.
- His new years resolution was to keep up his alcohol recovery process
Bald Bull 🇹🇷 🐂
- Didn't go to the Christmas party because he hates parties and doesn't celebrate Christmas. He flew back to Turkey to spend time with his family
- Gave gifts around new years to his many family members
- Didn't get his christmas sweater from the ref, but he wouldn't have liked it anyways
- Left Kaiser his secret santa present by the tree along with a note explaining why he didn't come
- When he came back in early January, he received his secret santa gift from Disco Kid. He got a pair of fluffy bull slippers. He loves them and wears them every morning now.
- His new years resolution was to become more approachable
Super Macho Man 🇺🇸🌊
- Is the one who wrapped up Joe and placed him under the tree
- Didn't like the itchy santa sweater he got (it irritated his artificially tanned skin), but he wore it most of the party because Soda wanted to take selfies with him... and gosh darn it, he won't admit it, but he liked seeing Soda all happy and enjoying himself
- Secretly cuddled with Soda each time he had nightmares about the krampus
- Also got scared by Kaisers story
- "Bro who told you about this fucking creature?!?"
- "Mien grandparents."
- "Ah, who would've guessed."
- Made Christmas thrist traps and posted them alongside Don. They even recreated that one santa scene from Mean Girls with just two people
- Recieved his secret santa gift from Piston Hondo. He got a nautical themed surf board, signed by all of the boxers. Bro let's out the loudest fucking "HELL YEAH BRO" when he got it.
- His new years resolution is to keep being talented and handsome
Mr. Sandman 💤 🟢
- Didn't participate in secret santa
- Spent Christmas alone, working out
- Recieved a WVBA merch gift card from Mr. Dream, and a ton of fan mail and gifts from his fans
- Spent Christmas night staying comfortable and sleeping peacefully
- His new years resolution is to try and find a hobby outside of boxing
(Bonus! Because I didn't wanna end on a sad note.)
Little Mac 🥊🟢
- Spent Christmas with Doc and Peter Punch, away from the Christmas party
- They all pulled an all nighter, watching Christmas movies all night
- Doc managed to pull enough money together to give both of them a plentiful christmas
- Despite being teens, Mac and Peter still both believe in Santa Clause.
- They both got lots of presents on Christmas morning, but their favorite gifts was the gamer tank top meant for Peter, and for Mac, it was this necklace with a picture of Doc and Mac first leaving the orphanage
- Mac's new years resolution is to finish school with passing grades, Peter's resolution is to keep up his appearance, and Doc's resolution is to lose a little bit of weight
Merry Christmas everyone! Have a happy holidays! And from the boxers...
"Joyeux noël" - Glass Joe
"Frohe Weihnachten" - Von Kaiser
"RAWR" - King Hippo
"Merīkurisumasu" - Piston Hondo
"मेरी क्रिसमस!" - Great Tiger
"Feliz Navidad!" - Don Flamenco
"Nollaig Shona!" - Aran Ryan (he knows a little bit of Irish lol)
