#long;

[valiisthea]

[ I am so overwhelmed with love for all of my followers tonight. I just want to reiterate how wonderful and truly amazing I think you all are. Regardless if we’ve spoken or not, if you’ve followed me since day one or merely five minutes ago, you’re important to me.

You made a conscious choice to be here with me and my muses, and that means the world to all of us.

Thank you for your continued support and please know that the fact that I am slow to reply never, EVER means that I don’t want to write with you. You may send as many memes as you want, tag me in starters, ask me to write starters, ask me to send you inbox shenanigans, ask me to plot, ask me to muse, or just come talk to me ooc for the hell of it! I won’t turn you away.

You were all here for me through the past week, which has arguably been one of the worst weeks of my life - being unable to eat for 3 to 4 days, not sleeping for almost just as long, skating the cusp of near dehydration, being in a burning hot pain so intense I couldn’t walk, stand, sit, or lay in any comfortable position to get rid of it. I’m certain I was no angel, especially since I was still working through all of that. I don’t remember most of the past few days but despite this setback, all of you came to my aid when I asked for help and were here for me when I had panicked about the pain and honestly?? It’s really enough to make me cry.

Your dedication and support and love is what keeps me here and going. I hope you know that if any of you ever need me, I’m here. Ask for me. Do not be afraid. Don’t be afraid to tell me you want a starter or an ask, or anything. Don’t be afraid to say “hey maybe can you call me just so I can cry and hear a human tell me everything is alright” because I will do it. I’ve done it before. 

These are just tiny things I can do to pay back all of the kindness you guys have shown me, but please remember them! I love you all dearly and I only wish you the best. You guys are fucking awesome. ]

[perkahlia]

            she makes you feel like the moon. she is blinding brightness and constant warmth and solar flares, loving and healing and explosive. she shines so brightly you can only hope to gleam back in the palest of reflections --- and some days you are too dark to shine back for her at all. she doesn’t mind; she glows for you anyways. she’s constant when you’re not, cares for you even when you cannot, brings sunshine and compassion even during your darkest cycles. she is the sun, and she makes you feel like the moon --- you wouldn’t trade the feeling for anything in the world.

    he makes you feel like the sun, as sure as if he’s given you his own name, the same way he offers you every other part of him. he is solid and constant and brimming with life and beauty, and no matter your attempts to push him away, he still spins in constant orbit around you, exactly where you always need him. even during your eclipses, when you are too dark to find the light in yourself, he waits patiently for you to glow again, and embraces your newfound gleam as though there is nothing to forgive. he is something so unendingly good, and he makes you feel like something good, too. he is your world, and he makes you feel like his sun --- you wouldn’t trade the feeling for anything in the world.

        my darling, i know that everyone you love has come away changed, has come out of it shrouded in violence --- either covered in battle scars or thirsting for blood. i know it has happened often enough to shatter your heart, to make you build a wall around yourself. i know it has happened often enough that you think the problem is you. my darling, i know you are scared to open your heart again, scared to let them brush their fingers over the parts of you that have pushed others away, that some have grown to hate --- i know you are scared to lose them in the same way.

            but you are celestial bodies and though you are always hurtling towards the unknown, you are locked in a dance so cosmic and beautiful you can never be pulled apart. i know you are scared to love when love always finds a way to be ruined, but, my darling, it’s all right to love one just as fiercely as you love the other.                 it’s all right --- so love them.

[literalillbeats]

IM!!! REALLY UPSET N PISSED RN ALSO ON MOBILE SO YALL GOTTA DEAL W MY ASS TIL I GET ON MY LAPTOP TO DELETE/READMORE THIS SHIT

literally i just woke up again and my phones got messages from college friends and my siblings who all also went to the same main branch of the national university i did with news that ANOTHER building was on fire. Like AS WE SPEAK,

thing is, the school is over 100 years old, the buildings have endured, then suddenly within the last idk 3-4ish years, three root facilities have been burned down (the biggest common cafeteria on campus, the main faculty center, AND now the shopping center which has a ton of printing shops and general places to Get Shit Done),,,,,,and the thing here is, my school has a reputation for being one of the biggest driving/leading forces of the student activist movement against the government pulling all kinds of shit??? and even if the news covers it up every time as some kinda accident, just looking at the targetted buildings fuckin say enough that its a high likelyhood that foulplay is involved,,,,,,,

the cafeteria was an issue at the time bc corporate names wanted to oust the in-campus service union to sell their more expensive food, we protested along with the staff (who by the way, are super friendly and allow students to keep tabs in case they were super broke but were starving)

what happens? building gets burned down, the news say it was a fire sparked by a faulty electric socket; fire happened before dawn

The faculty center? even the professors arent afraid to speak out abt all the injustice and bs the government gets up to; this building is old AF by the way, as in years and years worth of teaching material, some offices of past professors whove become nationally acclaimed and everything,,,,

AGAIN, building gets burned down, all the teaching materials, all the records, all the student output that still needed grading/returning, all gone; this happened in the dead of night

NOw, there have been more recent conflicts w the student activists making headlines and things to speak out against the president himself (who by the way is pretty fucking much on dictator mode now) to Make Good Changes instead of the bs hes been up to since literally day 1

and now the shopping center is on fire. the building where students/teachers/anybody tbh gets supplies, food (from again, nice in-campus union staff; this is p much the 2nd place to go to if not the aforementioned cafeteria), hell even uni merch to rep where were from, INCLUDING the place where we get our graduation garb, and not to mention the numerous computer/print shops where we get papers and plates printed out

and its thesis printing season. so those shops are full of thesis manuscripts for printing and binding

i aM PISSED AS HELL,

[literalillbeats]

M!A: So close and yet so far: is it just you, or have there suddenly been signs of another person from your past that have been showing up out of nowhere?

It was never anything you ever anticipated, despite it having been over two years since.

It comes and goes, like broken clockwork. You go through the same motions, the same thoughts, the same feelings of guilt, anger, betrayal, before slowly simmering back down to a numb sadness. The process is always the same, it’s just that it’s never when you’re ready for it.

Lately it’s been resurfacing more and more frequently.

Confused memories, the aching pang of missing someone who’d once been so close to you... Then the heavy knot of guilt in your stomach for knowing full well that what you were doing wasn’t going anywhere good.

Then it stopped just being in your head.

A faded red hoodie, worn in to a softness from daily use, carelessly tossed onto an armchair.

It’s not yours, nor is it Johnny’s.

A faint whiff of cigarette smoke.

Neither you nor Johnny smoke anymore, and certainly not this one that had such a distinct smell.

The day you began noticing these things, you’d gone pale, eyes widening in shock.

Where? Why? Who?Don’t lie to yourself. You know exactly who.

Your fingers ghost over the soft fabric, trailing over worn seams.

It’s been years since you last saw this. Years since you last saw him. 

Your breath hitches slightly with emotion, a choked back sob, when you snatch up the hoodie in your hands, knuckles white with how you gripped it as if grabbing someone by their shirt, as if to shake them, to demand answers, to know why they were doing this, why were they here, why did you leave, why did you leave?

You don’t even realize you’d buried your face in the article, crying into it, pressing your nose against it to catch traces of a scent that had once been so familiar.

“--See you later when I get home, okay? Love you!”

Johnny’s voice from the front door tears you away from your blind fumbling in the buried recesses of your memories. It startles you, makes you nearly drop the hoodie in guilt.

Your lips are slightly parted to drag in breaths, ragged at the edges from how much you had apparently cried.

It would upset him.Differently from how it’s evidently upsetting you.

Your knees buckle, and you drop down onto the couch, filled with a terrible mixture of emotions.

Karkat’s hoodie-- your Karkat-- lay pooled in your lap.It was just like he’d just taken it off after coming home to you from a long day.

Only...He wasn’t really here.

And you don’t even know how this got into your home in the first place.

[literalillbeats]

☑️☑️☑️☑️☑️☑️☑️☑️ B]

Send “🗹” for a fun fact about my muse

hecke

Dave only found out junior year high school that their current family dog, Kami (short for kamina), is actually kami the second. He remembers having the same dog for as long as he could remember (and they technically did; the original kami was misha’s birthday gift from their dad), and he was wondering how he’s managed to live for so long,,,,,

Kami the second only came about bc Misha knew telling Dave and Dirk that their dog died would absolutely break their hearts, so he seriously hunted around for a dog that looked as close as possible (and told the two boys that kami must’ve shrunk; they bought it, they were like 6 and 8 years old)

Dave’s russian accent becomes pronounced when he’s flustered and thickens the more flustered he gets, then he starts forgetting english words here and there

He is the Gremlin Baby Brother; he and Dirk often gang up on Misha to give him some loving brotherly bullying (which is probably why he does more or less the same with Avi and Karkat)

Dave got his first tattoo at 15 (the plague doctor mask on his left forearm), the second at age 17 (stylized caduceus on his right hip), and third at just short of 19 (the fractured feather + birds on the left side of his ribs)

He still contemplates about whether or not he should be pursuing medicine rather than paleontology

He’s more in touch with his Russian roots than he is his Greek roots, but he’s trying to learn as much as he can

He doesn’t actually actively hide the more mischievous(/nsfw) side of himself so much as he usually tends to be able to pass it off as friendly banter

[literalillbeats]

my url, hit me with that gay.

send me “talk about them!” + a url and I’ll talk about that person

youre not even ready for this

first off let me start this off withjohnny ismy light my love my world my everythin g a fucking blessing on this earth and im incredibly lucky to have him and the sentiments returnedyknow for the longest time that whole ‘home is where the heart is’ has only been applicable with my brothers since theyre family and shit butjohnnys home now tooive known and felt that way since the very beginning and times done nothing but definitely cement that in placehes seen me at some definite low points (especially recently) and still stuck around, insists on sticking around even and i really do feel that its genuine and not like out of obligation or whateverhes never made me feel alone and if ever i do end up feeling lonely and keeping it to myself, as soon as he gets even the slightest hint of that he always makes sure to remind me that hes always going to be there and he wont hesitate to remedy the situation if i was ever feeling that wayhe isthe best thing thats happened to me in a long timeand i dont think that i can ever fully articulate the full significance of that by any means possibleits justpalpable to me how different he is from anyone else ive met beforetheres just something there yknow?its that soulmate feelit sounds cheesy as fuck and you know how people are always bullshitting about that concept but this is legitimately the first time in my life that ive actually genuinely felt and understood thatlike ive mentioned this to him before but whenever i saw john being an absolute sap about his partners, it was a very third party view like ‘thats nice but cant really relate’ and now fucking look at this wall of sappy text?? like mom holy shit im gay and in love!!!i reallyreallyhope we can be together for as long as possiblebecause its only been a while but go d hes made life so much better already ://)

[literalillbeats]

💬 - ALSO PIANOREMIX I'M READY TO CRIE (that's cry & die at the same time, u kno)

Send a 💬 to hear how my muse feels about yours.

HOO BOY ARE YOU READY FOR THIS BC IM NOT READY FOR THIS

BOY HE GAYHE GAY AS FUCK!!

literally dave has been nothing but open about how he feels about johnny, and while u kno this lemme lay this out for the people of the dash,,

this, by far, has been the most in love dave has ever been. it’s a little weird for him bc in the past, he’s often ended up dating/being attracted to people who become his friends first bc You Never Know, but with johnny they just kind of clicked. from the very first time dave met him he was already getting those crush butterflies but he tried his best to play it cool bc he was still feeling kind of down about close relationships in general, and wanted to keep his distance, but goddAMN did that go right tf out the window bc dave was getting closer and closer already even by the time they hung out a second time. after johnny confirmed romantic intentions dave just fuckening dove off the deep end and here he is! gay af!!

hes That Gay that physically gets an ache in his chest from how full of love he feels whenever he thinks about johnny and the two of them are always telling each other abt how words/actions are never enough to show how they really feel abt each other bc listen here theyve laughingly talked abt marriage and parenthood together wtf……………

on the more eye emoji side tho sometimes dave feels sad too bc he is Very aware of him being mortal and johnny being more or less immortal and its a depressing thought; johnny has told him that hed still love dave even when dave is ancient but inside dave is like……… lmao dont let me hold you back but also dont leave me aaaaaa…………

SO U KNOGAY!!!!!