Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Whoever u want to insert there’s no names.
Guest Appearance: None.
World: AU but avengers
Genre: Fluff, uhh does this categorizes as slam poetry cause it’s just a weird prose type of thing.
Warnings: bad writing.
Word Count: 1.2K
Summary: Where originally everything was meant for him, and him alone, eventually it’s made to fit two, however possible.
Prompt: Coffee Mug. written for @coffee-with-bucky‘s writing challenge that i am insanely late to. I’m sorry I’m actually the worst.
Beta’d by the loveliest of people @delicatelyherdreams
Smooches! xoxo L
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One cup of scalding hot coffee, one spoonful of sugar, at precisely 6:30 am.
A lone glass of orange juice, a slice of toast, a thin layer of strawberry jam spread with the single same old butter knife, while sat at the only plastic chair at the minuscule plastic table by the window, sometime between 7:00 and 8:00.
A lone toothbrush sat in the tiny blue cup in the tiny bathroom. One rug, one towel, one bottle of shampoo.
One fork, one plate, one bowl for fruit.
In bed by 10:00.
Bucky Barnes was a man of routine, or at least he had turned into one. There was something about his current routine that gave him normalcy. A contrast from a past so reckless, so messy, so dangerous he couldn’t do one thing the same.
Sure, routine sounds like the most dangerous thing for a man like him. Routines make you trackable. Routines make you an easy target. But for the time being, he enjoyed the routine of being alone, at least.
It didn’t matter if he did the same thing yesterday that he did the day before. One more step to the right, or to the left when coming up the stairs to his small apartment, another lap around the park. A stop at a different food truck or street shop, every other day. It was all the little things, done a little differently to keep safe, but measured to categorise as a plan. And always alone.
He could fend for himself. He could keep himself safe. That was all he needed. It was how he had planned it.
Bucky Barnes would say he had a normal week.
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One cup of scalding hot coffee, one spoonful of sugar, at precisely 6:30 am.
A lone glass of orange juice, a slice of toast, a thin layer of strawberry jam spread with the single same old butter knife, while sat at the only plastic chair at the minuscule plastic table by the window, sometime between 7:00 and 8:00.
A lone toothbrush sat in the tiny blue cup in the tiny bathroom. One rug, one towel, one bottle of shampoo.
One fork, one plate, one bowl for soup.
Unusual leftovers, clamoring the space in the tiny fridge. Leftovers because he took too long that day. Leftovers because he agreed to a sandwich on the way.
Leftovers because he let his guard down.
Still, he took one extra step to the right when walking back home, and chucked the single copy of the keys to his place on the bedside table, as his head rested on the single pillow, at 10:15 pm.
Bucky Barnes would say he had a normal week. Ran a little late, but maybe that was for the better. After all he did take that extra step to the right.
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One cup of scalding hot coffee, one spoonful of sugar, at precisely 6:30 am.
A lone glass of orange juice, a slice of toast, a thin layer of strawberry jam spread with the single same old butter knife, while sat at the only plastic chair at the minuscule plastic table by the window, sometime between 7:00 and 8:00, and a sandwich packed to go.
A lone toothbrush sat in the tiny blue cup in the tiny bathroom. One rug, one towel, one bottle of shampoo running out.
One fork, one plate, one bowl for cereal.
A trip to the grocers. A new bottle of shampoo, and a can of a soda he’d been recommended. A new taste because he let his guard down.
In bed by 10:00.
Awakened by a text by 10:05. Finally asleep at a time unknown, phone on his chest.
Bucky Barnes would say he had a normal week, and his eye would twitch because he knew deep down, it wasn’t all that normal.
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One cup of scalding hot coffee, one spoonful of sugar, at 7:00 am.
A lone glass of orange juice, two slices of toast, a thin layer of strawberry jam spread with the single same old butter knife on each, both packed to go.
A lone toothbrush sat in the tiny blue cup in the tiny bathroom. One rug, one towel, one bottle of a new brand of shampoo.
One fork, one plate, a bowl for whatever else. A bag of leftovers that didn’t have his name on it.
The small plastic chair on the rooftop, staring at the stars, while listening to an album he’d been recommended. Multiple texts. Awakened by the sun hitting his skin and a sweet backache he didn’t mind too much.
Bucky Barnes would say he had a different week. He had lost some control. He would argue with himself to get it back.
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One cup of scalding hot coffee, one spoonful of sugar, at precisely 6:30 am.
A lone glass of orange juice, a slice of toast, a thin layer of strawberry jam spread with the single same old butter knife, while sat at the only plastic chair at the minuscule plastic table by the window, sometime between 7:00 and 8:00.
A lone toothbrush sat in the tiny blue cup in the tiny bathroom. One rug, one towel, one bottle of shampoo.
One fork, one plate, one bowl for fruit.
In bed by 10:00.
Bucky Barnes would say he had a normal week, despite something being off, and his hand itching to grab his phone, burning a hole in his pocket with every buzz. Control was hard.
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No coffee this morning.
No glass of orange juice.
No toast, no jam, no dirty plates.
A toothbrush sat in the tiny blue cup in the tiny bathroom.
The single button up he owned, fingers fumbling to get it buttoned. Nerves and deep breaths. A single hole in his stomach that felt like it would eat him alive.
In bed by 11:00, grinning like a fool until 12:00.
Bucky Barnes would say he had a good week.
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Two cups of scalding hot coffee, one with a spoonful of sugar, one with dash of milk, at whatever time he’d gotten up that day.
A glass of apple juice and a new glass of orange juice, two slices of toast, a choice of strawberry jam or peanut butter, spread with the single same old butter knife, while somehow comfortable sat at one chair, bumping knees with the person on the second chair, at the tiny plastic table meant for one. By the window, being kissed by the sun’s warmth, and having his beard tickled by curious fingers.
Two toothbrushes sat in the tiny blue cup in the tiny bathroom, bodies dancing around each other in the space clearly meant for one, never two. Bump after bump of hips. One rug, two towels, two bottles of shampoo, scattered makeup.
Two pairs of shoes by the door.
Two forks, two plates, two bowls, that were impossible to place in his meant-for-one cabinets.
Limbs tangled in bed by whatever time. Cold toes caressing his shin. Mouths kissing and whispering and giggling until unknown hours. Waking up to a warm body across his chest, and a leg dangling off the tiny mattress, murmurs of good mornings and her hands helping his hair back into his bun.
Bucky Barnes wanted all his weeks like this.
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FIN
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hope you enjoyed this. idk what this was, sorry. FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED! HERES MY ASK, HERE’S MY MASTERLIST
Have a good day dearies
Summary: It was so easy to slip from dislike to love. Both of you learned that the hard way. (40′s!Reader/Bucky Barnes).
Prompt: “I thought you said you couldn’t dance?”
A/N: This is for @coffee-with-bucky ‘s writing challenge. in the beginning, this is a different bucky from the one i usually write. i am trying to picture what would happened if he had been saved after falling from the train and all that good stuff. so, it’s a little different from what i usually write, but I hope you enjoy it either way.
He sees her from outside the small bakery that is just a few blocks away from his large and always empty apartment. She smiles and laughs with a customer and it has James Barnes pausing in the middle of the busy New York street. He needs to know who she is, needs to see more of that smile she seems to throw with ease.
It takes him three days to pick up the courage to enter the bakery. It takes him another two of walking around and staring at everything they have to finally come up with what he is going to say and what he is going to buy.
It’s a bustling Monday morning when Bucky finally decides to get his sandwich set and face that beautiful redhead with those bright, brown eyes. He takes one breathe then two, as the cashier upfront yell next. However, as their eyes meet, his blood suddenly freezes. He knows that he isn’t the same smooth talker as before, but now he was more of a recluse and irritable when things didn’t go his way.
Did he really want to subject a beautiful gal to that?
“Excuse me,” a voice from behind declares in irritation as Bucky’s melancholy, anger, and annoyance all mix together at being pulled out of his thoughts, “Could you please hurry up and move?”
Blue eyes, with James ready to give the person bothering him a piece of his mind, turn to be meet with a floppy white hat and with a woman wearing a frown on her face.
To leave a long story short, they both end up banned from the bakery that day.
Rebuilding, even some after some years had passed since the end the war is still on in some countries and thus both Steve and Peggy find themselves --along with the rest of the reformed Howling Commandos-- there most of the time since then. However, neither of them can wait any longer -- the subtle need to call each other man and wife is budding more than ever, it might not help that Peggy is already a few months along, and while they could have it anywhere in the world -- there are still precautions and people they want there.
Steve knows that he needs Bucky there --the man had been discharged after the whole train incident and sent back to New York to recuperate-- and Peggy was adamant to having her parents there, along with one other person. And while Steve had never meet Peggy’s old school friend face-to-face, they had traded enough phone calls and telegraphs to be somewhat friendly with each other.
This was meeting for some of the closest people in their younger years to come to celebrate their impending union and future bliss -- for the maid of honor and best man to get to know each other.
Neither Peggy nor Steve would have imagined, as they sat and sharing meaningful looks, that these two would have already known each other, much less dislike each other.
Steve knew from the very beginning that Bucky wasn’t in a good mood. The stocks --the profession that Bucky had chosen after graduating-- hadn’t been doing so well and his metal arm, for all of Stark’s latest tech wonders, was hurting like hell. It didn’t help the nightmares came back every once and awhile either.
“The strongest stuff you got,” Bucky suppress through gritted teeth from the counter as the attendant simply nods. Bucky tries his best to be his charming, former self by throwing the woman a smile, but all she does is look at the blond at his side.
Invisible all over again, Bucky thinks bitterly before hitting the countertop none too lightly with his left arm. It causes the young woman to yelp and Steve to give his best friend a questioning glance, but none of those are the things that catch James Barnes’ attention.
“Who is the asshole causing so much commotion?” a voice asks in annoyance from the back, where Peggy is seated talking to her friend who had arrived sometime before Bucky had, as blue eyes turn to meet a familiar figure -- one that had haunted him since New York.
“Who are you calling an asshole?” Bucky retaliated as he turns around and sees her sitting next to Peg in a black and white dress with her hair pinned back. Her eyes lit up in recognition and Bucky can’t help but be delighted that someone is paying attention to him, at least in some way.
She frowns and walks up, as Steve and Peggy look at each other: “The asshole that is making a commotion to this fine establishment for no apparent reason.”
The engaged couple is lucky that the little shop is empty as they watch the pair begin to verbally spat, though they are quick to calm down once Bucky gets his espresso drink and Peggy throws in a few choice words.
However, the tension is still there as all parties agree to stay in Paris for the month for Steve and Peggy’s small wedding.
Can you believe that idiot? How rude, I don’t understand how you would call him charming…
Peggy can’t help but quirk an eyebrow as you keep going on about one James Buchanan Barnes on the way back to your hotel room.
Such an infuriating dame! The nerve she has to…
Steve can’t help but grin behind his drink as he watches Bucky go on about a certain gal once they go get drinks to celebrate his upcoming wedding and child.
Steve and Peggy can already see ten steps ahead of where this might be going and with a shared laugh -- they plan together for the inevitable.
The four of you agree to meet every Friday to set up things between now and the middle of next month when the wedding is supposed to take place. You find out that Peggy wants to keep thing simple -- she already has the flowers and dress ready, but there are things between her and her mother that need to be sorted out -- you’re there to play mediator, make the lists and send them to Amanda Carter since Peggy was still tied up with SSR dealings.
Outside of supporting Steve, you weren’t sure what Bucky Barnes --sour-faced and drinking the most bitter on the menu-- was supposed to be doing there.
He sat there most of the time in silence, as you talked with Steve or Peggy about their current dealings, either that or he was hidden behind a newspaper grumbling. It’s annoying and unpleasing, as you wonder where the hell the Bucky that Steve had told you so fondly about was.
It’s the second Friday when you finally decide to ask.
“If you’re busy with something else,” you ask sometime before Peggy and Steve arrive, as you realize both you and Bucky are more punctual than normal people should be, “Why are you here?”
Blue eyes look up to meet yours for a moment as he puts the paper down. There is a seriousness to his face, but instead of it being mixed with anger or annoyance -- he’s tired and maybe even a little sad.
“’ve been through hell and back with Stevie,” Bucky remarks as he closes in a bit more on you, “There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for him, ‘m sure ya feel the same way about Pegs.”
Your eyes meet and he gives you a crooked smile for good measure, for you to understand exactly what he means, before leaning back into his chair. If he is a bit more vocal after that, you don’t say anything about it. Steve even gets him to share in on the stories from their childhood days more than usual and for some reason, you can’t help but feel that you might be a little wrong about your first impression when it comes to Bucky Barnes.
It’s the third Friday when it happens -- Bucky is cursing up a storm after the message he got from his associates back home. He was losing more faster than usual in his current investments and while he would rather be heading back home right now --he promised he would be there for Steve and Peggy.
He’s tearing himself over the newspaper and numbers adding up when he sees a finger pointing to a small company he has never heard of before. Bucky looks up in his desperation to see you with a serious look on your face, as you tap on the paper.
“If you care about your investments,” you explain as you take a seat across from him, “I suggest placing them here, they might be small but they’ve got some good backing -- both from Stark and Ford from what I have heard. If not, you should take it all out now.”
“How the hell do you know that?”
“Gathering information is my business, James,” you give him a smile with a wicked glint in your eyes and Bucky tries to ignore the shiver that goes down his spine, “And I am very good at it.”
“And you expect me to believe you?”
However, he doesn’t get an answer to that question as Steve and Peggy comes into the little shop. You simply give him a shrug before getting up and getting your order. If Bucky ever listens to you, he never tells you and if you saved him a couple of thousands — well, you most certainly didn’t know that either.
However, their world doesn’t stay quiet enough for the power couple planning their upcoming nuptials as both Steve and the rest of the Howling Commandos are called for a classified mission, Peggy is sent somewhere else though she can’t tell you anything else. Everything is close to being completed and her parents and younger brother have ready set sail. The couple frowns as they ask you if you could wait — it wouldn’t take them long.
“Can you both stay a little while longer?”
That is the question, as you pretend to ignore Bucky’s right hand turn a stiffening white due him gripping it too hard together, but you already knew the answer to that one.
“I have nowhere else to be,” you admit, trying to hide the obvious fact that you lacked a family or anyone besides Peggy and your job with a bright smile, “I’ll wait as long as you need of me.”
Bucky agrees to the same, but you can’t help but wonder —as he has that glassy-eyed look and somber smile for a quick second— if he would rather be following Steve down that familiar road once more.
However, Bucky --through the war and work-- had become a man of routine and even when he knows that there is going to be none waiting at the cafe that Friday after both Steve and Peggy had left, he goes anyways. He is surprised to see you there, sitting by the piano the owner has tucked away in the corner, with a cup of tea at hand. You’re moving your fingers to-and-for on the keys, like a familiar song that a much younger Bucky Barnes used to dance to filters into the small shop.
The owner simply nods to him a greeting as Bucky finds himself walking to where you are. There are a million questions on his mind as you pause playing midway to turn up from your seat and give him a questioning glance. He gives you an awkward smile and for once the ever-present feeling to fight or just cause you some type of annoyance is drained out of him with the realization of just how pretty you are sitting there in that light-colored dress and painted lips.
“That was really nice,” Bucky can’t help but admit as your smile grows just a bit, “Where ya learn to play?”
“Etiquette school,” you explain with a slight frown while moving a bit to the side --as a peace offering for now-- and allowing Bucky to share the piano bench with you, “Though it’s probably the only thing I learned there.”
“Now, that sounds like a story,” he remarks as you look at him, sizing him up, for a moment before you move forward with talking a bit more about yourself.
And boy do you, as you end up talking about how your parents ended up settling in England for diplomatic purposes and you ended up taking classes here and there for a proper “debut” -- that’s how you meet one Margaret Carter, who while you didn’t see eye-to-eye on some things they were teaching understood you on some level. It was the start of a lifelong friendship, though it did come with dumps here and there -- namely when one of you got in trouble.
“--And the Peg punches him straight in the face,” you let out a huge laugh at the memory before covering with your hand, “We were both sent to the headmaster’s office and weren’t allowed in the same classes all year.”
“Troublemakers, the both of ya,” Bucky can’t help but chuckle with a shake of his head as you keep laughing.
“Like you and Steve are any better, Mr. Barnes,” you answer back as Bucky tries to defend himself by stating that the back alley fighter was Steve.
And you spend the rest of the afternoon trading stories and showing Bucky what else you could play on the piano.
It’s between the first and second Friday without Steve and Peggy that Bucky realizes that he might actually like you in a certain type of way. Yes, you could be an annoyance, but you were a spitfire and when you smile -- well, it makes the whole room shined. But, it wasn’t like before that Bucky said a few choice words and smiled and had all the gals at his feet -- he didn’t feel like doing that anymore and he was sure that wasn’t going to work with you.
“You should just tell her, Buck,” Steve remarks in the middle of the week in their quick phone call, “You might be surprised with the outcome.”
“It’s not that easy anymore, Stevie,” Bucky fusses while going over the numbers again in his room alone, though he would rather not be.
“You should take my word on it, punk,” Steve quips and James can just imagine that shit-eating grins on his face, “When ‘ve I ever steered ya wrong?”
“Too many times, pal,” Bucky sighs out with a laugh before saying goodbye.
There are too many things running through his head as he lays down for the night -- of what could be and your pretty laugh as you played a very bad rendition of Fur Elise. He thinks about what you like and what it would be like if you said no -- if you could walk around Central Park together or if you could just walk around Brooklyn. They are all silly thoughts, but for the first time in a long time -- Bucky ends up going to sleep without any nightmares bothering him.
He keeps it to himself that on his morning walk he finds a hairpiece in the shade of your eyes and he decides to buy it in that exact moment.
The following Friday, Bucky is ready -- there is a speech in his head and he’s ready to declare all his emotions, regardless of what you might feel for him. I mean, really -- who in their right mind would like the man that had treated them so rudely before?
He gets his answer when he sees you sitting outside of the cafe for once, underneath the bright blue sky with some man that he has never seen before and as much as Bucky shouldn’t jump to conclusions -- he can’t help it at the sound of your laughter in certain way he has never heard before.
Bucky lets out a sigh of defeat before turning around and going back the way he came from.
You end up trying to connect with Peggy when you realize that Bucky never came to meet you that afternoon. However, Peggy isn’t in the best place to get a connection, which leads to trading short messages through telegraph with her instead.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO BUCKY?
Peggy takes some time to answer back, but her response makes you freeze in realization.
HE IS FINE, BUT WHY ARE YOU SO WORRIED ABOUT HIM?
You knew why though, had known since New York actually.
It doesn’t take you long, that next morning, to find out where Bucky is staying though you probably always knew --just across the cafe in a suite too big and lavish for him-- and had decided to tuck the information away until it was necessary. Now, with feeling and something else on the line, it seemed like a good time to go out there.
You dressed in that familiar dress and hat from the first time you had talked to him, even though you had watched him for much longer than that and head to his suite. You knock once then twice, hearing his voice yelling that he wants to be left alone, which only leads to you knocking harder until you hear him moving about.
You have a growing mental list of all the things you want to yell at him, but that all die when he opens the door and you finally see him after a whole day apart -- loose button up shirt and slacks with mussed hair and sad blue eyes.
“Idiot,” is the only thing you manage to say before grabbing and pulling his face to meet yours in a kiss. He lets out a sigh, as he slowly comes to understand everything that you are trying to convey in that one action as he pulls you in closer and you end up closing the door with your heel.
Neither of you let go of each other, trading in the long kiss for short nips and bites when air becomes needed once more. He drags your body closer to his as you move about the suite. However, Bucky only lets you go once, as you make it to the master bedroom and keep scattering clothes about as he stares at you with a serious look in those baby blues of his.
“And that man I saw you with yesterday?” he asks breathlessly.
“Peggy’s dressmaker,” you explains through puffs of air and kiss-swollen lips, “Needed an update about her measurements.”
“You’re an infuriating woman, doll,” Bucky lets of a relieved sigh and gives you a silly grin before picking you up and throwing you into the large mattress. You can’t help but laugh as well -- surely not believing that it could have ended like this for the two of you.
However, things are taken slowly --for his own anxiety and your own personal fears-- as you spend the rest of the evening talking quietly to each other and trading in soft, pliant kisses with one another.
If Steve hears a light giggle (after he tells Bucky that they are heading back to France) on the other side of the line, well he doesn’t say anything on the matter -- waiting for how long it takes Peggy to put two and two together when she can’t reach you.
It takes them a little while longer for them get back, but the Carters and Howling Commandos --along with you and Bucky-- are there to welcome the future of your best friends.
“--and do you, Steven Grant Rogers--”
It’s then that Peggy curses and starts falling to her knees, though Steve stops that from happening.
Peggy ends up going into labor before the priest can finish the nuptials and as everyone rushes to the hospital, you can’t help but squeeze Bucky’s hand just a bit tighter than usual as he leads you down the hallway.
Everyone is a mess with excitement and anxiety, but you can’t help --as you stare at bright blue eyes-- thinking that everything was going to be okay.
A few years down the road, once everything had settled down and with Sarah being a little older, Steve and Peggy have a much more extravagant wedding paid for by one Howard Stark in Upper Manhattan, though the guest lists is still rather tamed and you and Bucky still up with your former duties of best man and maid of honor.
However, the nature of your relationship is a bit different as you push him to the dance floor with a laugh as he can’t help but follow.
“I thought you said you couldn’t dance?” Bucky can’t help but ask as you give him, remembering it wasn’t something you actually really enjoyed. A wide smile on his face over the potential change before he twirls you around, though not enough to take any attention from the bride and groom.
“I’ve been practicing,” you remark vaguely, not ready to tell him that was trying to pick of the hobby that as of recently Bucky was trying to enjoy once more. He grins as he catches sight of a certain hairpiece placed perfectly within your stunning hair-do before trying back to look and Steve, Peggy, and little Sarah dancing.
It passes, but you can’t help but be a little curious: “Why do you keep staring at Steve and Peg?”
“I’m just wondering,” Bucky states in a more confident voice as blue eyes turn to meet your own.
“About what?”
“Just how lovely you might look in a wedding dress,” he gives you that dashing smile you have gotten so used to, before dipping you to the sound of the song. Though, you let out the most undignified squeal over the sudden act and his response.
Bucky laughs, hearty and full of love, as you pull him in for a kiss. The both of you silently thanking the married couple for bringing you together, as a certain velvet box stays hidden in Bucky’s pocket for a bit longer.
Summary: After skipping out on one of Tony’s parties, a heavily intoxicated super soldier decides it’s the best idea to show up at your door.
Author Note: This was the first writing challenge that I’ve ever entered... and I’m over a month late with the deadline, but I decided to post it anyway. I am SO sorry about being so late with it, but life took a very hectic turn over the past couple of months. The prompt was “How long was I drunk for?” for the wonderful writing challenge that coffee-with-bucky hosted. Again, I feel terrible for being so late with it!
Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader
Word Count: 1,752 words.
Warnings: None.
It was well passed the stroke of midnight when the rapping of knuckles against her door aroused her from the consistent binge watching of television. With furrowed brows, she tentatively crossed the threshold of her small apartment. Her fingertips had barely brushed the doorknob when another round of urgent knocking broke through the silence. Halting briefly, she took a moment to take a deep and calming breath. Whoever was on the other side of that door had better have a damn good reason to be so impatiently banging on her door in the middle of the night.
Swinging open the door with the haughtiest of huffs, she almost let out a shriek as a body stumbled forward and damn near almost took her down to the floor. Bracing her hands against his broad chest and digging her heels into the carpet, she steadied the super soldier.
Under ‘normal’ circumstances, her first thought would have been a mission gone wrong or an ambush against the team, but the civilian clothes that Steve sported had led her to an entirely different conclusion. And the moment he opened his mouth to speak, the distinctive smell of liquor tickled her nose.
A quick flash of an early morning conversation between her and Tony flickered across her mind. He had mentioned that Thor and Loki would be visiting the compound for another of Tony’s Galas, so the extremely drunk super soldier was beginning to make a lot more sense.
“Why aren’t you at the party?” The slurred question fell passed his lips.
“Why aren’t you at the party?” She made sure to put an emphasis on the ‘you’ part, but it still seemed to go over Steve’s head.
He swayed forward again as he spoke. “Are you mocking me?”
“No, I’m asking you in all seriousness,” she stressed, the exhaustion becoming apparent in her tone.
Shifting his weight, he leaned against the door frame, glossy blue eyes glancing her up and down. It was an odd gesture, but the crooked grin that accompanied it had her remembering that she hadn’t taken a moment to throw on some more appropriate clothing for answering the door in the middle of the night. Nervously and self-consciously, she pulled down the hem of the over-sized tee-shirt in an attempt to cover up a bit more of her exposed legs.
Clearing her throat, she spoke once more. “You haven’t answered my question yet.”
“Because I’m standing in your doorway instead.”
“Leaning,” she clarified.
“I’m resting my shoulder.”
“Okay, but why exactly are you resting your shoulder in my doorway instead of enjoying Tony’s party?”
Suddenly, he was leaning forward again, bringing his pointer finger up to press against her chest. The gesture earned a glance, and for the first time she noticed the opened beer bottle in his hand.
“Because I realized someone skipped out on Stark’s event,” he said with a small huff.
With a roll of her eyes, she frowned and crossed her arms over her chest in an almost defiant manner.
“Listen here, Captain, you know I’m not one for formal events.”
“It’s not formal at all, but you do have to wear pants.” The sly comment at the end was accompanied by another one of his crooked grins, and she could feel the sudden heat warming her cheeks.
“All right, but why would I want to attend an overtly flashy social event when I can just stay in my cozy apartment, catch up on my favorite shows, and just get the gossip from Nat in the morning?” She challenged with another signature huff.
His reply came without a single moment of hesitation, blurted out with the honesty of a drunken heart.
“Obviously because we could be laughing at Sam’s silly jokes and watching Buck charm the pants off of every woman that looks at him and listening to Tony trying to convince some stupid business guys to invest in a new invention and---” he paused momentarily, realizing he hadn’t taken a single breath during his rant.
When he went to speak again, he was met with a hand clasped firmly over his mouth. Furrowing his brows in confusion, he leaned forward against the palm of her hand.
“Let me throw on some pants and a more appropriate shirt.”
With that, she dropped her hand away from his mouth, turned on her heel, and headed back into her apartment. There was a brief moment of awkwardness as Steve watched her disappear into her bedroom before he decided on stumbling into the living-room. Though his vision wasn’t close to being blurred or seeing two heads on one person, it definitely wasn’t the best. The room was darkened with the exception of the flickering light of the television and the soft sliver of light coming from the ajar bedroom door.
He leaned onto the back of the couch, eyeing the television as he brought the bottle to his parched lips. Another rerun of Friends played across the screen, and he couldn’t help but chuckle at the scene between Joey and Chandler arguing over something childish.
“I’m not staying longer than an hour.” Her voice called from the bedroom, and he tilted his head towards the sound of the door swinging fully open.
The way his eyes swept over her attire of tight jeans and the delicate fabric of the black shirt that hung off her right shoulder, had her questioning her quick selection to throw on something decently comfortable. He watched as she slipped on a pair of comfortable sneakers, balancing herself with a careful palm pressed against the wall.
“You’re makin’ me feel bad, doll.”
She straightened up, squaring her shoulders as she did so. The nickname that slipped passed his lips without a second thought had her heart skipping a beat. Another deep breath and she pushed the sudden surge of emotional butterflies to the pit of her stomach.
After all, she knew it was just a drunken blunder. There was no deeper meaning behind the soft way the word rolled off his lips.
“Come on, old man,” she mumbled, making her way over to the super soldier, “let’s get this over with.”
Steve attempted, rather feebly, to steady himself after pushing away from the back of the couch. It was to no avail, and she found herself reaching out once more to steady the man before her. Fingertips pressed against his shoulder, trying desperately to anchor him into place.
“I’m sorry.”
Two simple words spilled passed his lips, and the confusion was more than apparent on her face.
“I lied to you.”
“What are you talking about?”
The question barely slipped from her lips before she found his forehead pressed against her own, his fingers curling around her arm. She found herself unable to move, those bright blue eyes boring into her own, and suddenly she found herself forgetting how to breathe, as if drowning in a sea of abrupt emotions.
“I don’t want you to go to the Tony’s Gala.”
His voice was a whisper against the faint noise of the television. The thumping of her heartbeat in her ears was deafening.
“Then why---”
“Because you should have been there.”
“Yeah, I get that and I’m going to go now--”
His fingers curled tighter around her arm, his head falling to the side and resting against her shoulder. She could smell the liquor spilling off of him with every breath he heaved, and the tickle of his stubble against her cheek made it difficult to continue her train of thought.
“I’m sorry,” he breathed, his hand loosening against her arm.
She felt his weight against her body, his knees slowly beginning to buckle under the wave of exhaustion from a late night indulgence of alcohol. Thinking as quick as her own tired brain would calculate, taking a deep breath she heaved his heavy body over the back of the couch. Silently thanking whatever guardian angel that was looking over her shoulder that he didn’t roll off the couch and onto the floor.
Sighing once more, she kicked off her shoes on the way back to her bedroom. After a couple minutes and a quick change of clothes, she returned with a spare blanket and pillow. Settling back into the familiar position on the couch, she tossed the blanket over Steve’s limp out body, and wedged the pillow underneath his head.
She knew it was going to be a long night of babysitting the passed out super soldier, but at least he’d have someone to make sure he didn’t throw up or roll off the couch.
Though, she almost dreaded the morning to come when a heavily hungover and confused Steve would bombard her with questions about how he had ended up on her couch instead of his own room.
When the light began to stream into the living room, slipping between the parted curtains, was when Steve started to stir from his slumber. He hadn’t given her much trouble throughout the night, only waking up a few times to briefly mumble something under his breath, and pass out once more. Though at some point in the night, he had shoved the pillow onto the floor, and decided sleepily to use the side of her leg as a more comfortable substitute.
It didn’t bother her, and when he began to nuzzle his face into her hip, she ran a comforting hand through his hair, trying to ease him back into the realm of sleep.
“Go back to sleep, Steve.” Her own voice was laced with the grains of sleepiness as she mumbled to the super soldier.
“How long was I drunk for?”
She stifled a tired chuckle, shaking her head softly.
“I think you mean ‘how drunk was I’.”
“Same thing,” he muttered against the fabric of her pajamas.
“To answer your question, Steve, you were quite a drunk man.”
There was a groan that came from the man beside her. After taking a deep breath, he murmured a quiet question. “I didn’t do anything embarrassing, did I?”
A small shrug rolled off her exhausted shoulders. “Nothing other than apologizing a bunch of times.”
“Thank god,” he breathed in relief.
Another pause of silence fell between the two of them, and as she opened her mouth to question him about the needless apologies, she found herself greeted with the soft snores of a man that had drifted back to sleep. Chuckling to herself, she absentmindedly ran her fingers through his hair once again.
Author’s note: This was for @coffee-with-bucky‘s writing challenge! My prompt was: “I know who you are. You’re a softie under that tough exterior of yours.”
This is kinda pretty angsty. I had My Own Prison by Creed on repeat while writing this, although I did switch songs to For Blue Skies by Strays Don’t Sleep towards the end, in case anyone wants to listen. Hope y’all enjoy it and let me know what ya think!
@marvelpoststuff thank you again for reading it over and for creating the photo edit for my fic! <3
Summary: Bucky becomes distant during the trials of the crimes he committed as the Winter Soldier.
You suspected that Bucky would struggle somehow as the trials that would decide to either hold him accountable for his time as the Winter Soldier or exonerate him came, but in a typical Bucky fashion, he remained stoic. You kept a close eye on him, you knew his time in Wakanda healed some of the wounds HYDRA inflicted upon him, but you were worried that his nightmares would come back stronger than ever while having to face evidence of what HYDRA made him do. Nights you usually spent with Bucky you were now spending alone. He came to bed well after you’d fallen asleep waiting for him, and was out of bed before you’d wake. Tonight was another one of those nights. You were reading a book trying to wait up for him, but your eyes were starting to burn with the need to close them and sleep. Before you knew it, the next time you woke it was dawn and the suns rays were just beginning to kiss the New York City skyline. Your hand drifted to Buck’s side of the bed that was still a bit warm. A soft sigh escaped your lips before you decided to get up and face the day. You had hoped that since it was a Saturday you might have been able to wake up with him unlike the past two weekends since the trial had started. Having showered the night before you simply splashed some water on your face and brushed your teeth before throwing on a pair of leggings and one of Bucky’s long-sleeve shirts. You begin to sluggishly walk to the kitchen knowing Bucky has probably already left the house. You begin the process of making coffee before you realize that you are out of coffee grounds. Taking a deep breath, you decide to go to the grocery store since you had put it off to go to the trial this past couple of weeks. Writing Bucky a note that you leave on the counter for him to see, you slip on your shoes and grab your keys and head out.
An hour later you bring the groceries inside and putting them away. You finish making the coffee you had started this morning and you notice that Bucky still isn’t home yet. You curl up on the sofa with your cup of coffee on the coffee table and a book before draping a blanket over your lap. Mentally exhausted, it doesn’t take long before you’re asleep on the couch. Half an hour later, Bucky walks in, seeing your sleeping form with the book you were reading open in your lap. He knew you were worried about him, about how the trials would affect him. He would be the first to admit that you not only had every right to be worried, but that your worries weren’t unfounded. He had been avoiding you lately, and the guilt ate him up inside. However, the guilt of what he had done as the Winter Soldier was obliterating him. He felt as if he didn’t deserve you, and he was waiting for you to realize that, with every day that the trial dragged on, with every name and face that he had affected, he was waiting for you to look at him with disgust in your eyes and leave. He certainly wouldn’t have blamed you. That wasn’t the only reason he was avoiding you though, mainly at night. Every day that the trial went on the prosecutor would mention another name and show another face belonging to someone that no longer existed because of him, because of what HYDRA made him do as Steve would remind him. With that, his nightmares also returned. Even though it was unhealthy, and you would be sure to scold him the second you found out, he figured if he didn’t sleep, or slept as little as possible, he couldn’t have a nightmare. So he would work out for hours at night before he would go to sleep, climbing into bed long after you had passed out waiting for him, and he would wake up before you to workout, effectively tiring himself out enough that when he would sleep it would be deep enough that he wouldn’t be able to dream and wouldn’t wake you from his nightmares. Looking at you now he felt terrible for avoiding you, neglecting you. You showed up every single day of this trial to support him, and never complained that you went to bed and woke up without him. He knew this was taking its toll on you. You slept more often and seemed to only consume coffee with maybe one actual meal a day, Bucky had wanted to be strong for the both of you, but now he realized all he had managed to do was neglect you and isolate himself within his own mental prison. He decided he would shower before he’d make you something to eat for when you woke up.
You had taken one of the longest naps you had probably ever taken. The sun was low in the winter sky, eclipsed by the buildings. You stretched before smelling something cooking in the kitchen. You nearly panicked before you realized that you hadn’t started cooking anything before you had fallen asleep, and that meant that it must be Bucky cooking. You slowly got up and walked towards Bucky in the kitchen, he was humming something to himself that you didn’t recognize and stirring something in front of him. Wrapping your arms around his middle from behind, you rested your forehead against the center of his back between his shoulder blades. He tensed up for a millisecond before relaxing, but you had noticed the uncharacteristic action.
“Whatever your cooking smells delicious,” you say with a groggy voice before you clear your throat.
“Is that so? I made your favorite, broccoli cheese soup. The rolls are in the oven should be done in a few minutes.”
“Mmmm. Sounds good.” A smile is now plastered on your face. Maybe, just maybe, you have your Bucky back. You squeeze your arms around him to show your appreciation.
“Good. D’you wanna grab some bowls and stuff for us? I think the soup is done and I’m gonna take a look at the rolls.”
You nod your head yes against his back before letting go of him, immediately missing his warmth. He missed your arms wrapped around him just as quickly. Walking over to the cupboard you get out all the things you would need before leaning against the counter and looking at Bucky. You noted how his long-sleeved shirt was more snug on him than it had been before, his sweatpants were hung low on his waist, and his hair was pulled back into a bun against the nap of his neck. It felt like this was the first time you were seeing him in weeks, and in a way you were. The Bucky standing before you now was a much more honest version than the one you saw in court for the last few weeks. He pulled the rolls out of the oven and set them on the stove to cool before making his way over to you, it was now that you got a good look at his face. A straight on view. You could see the dark half-moon circles beneath his eyes. His hands gripped your waist and your hands rested on his chest. He looked into your eyes before glancing down at your lips and looking back into your eyes again. Bucky slowly lowered his lips to yours, nearly groaning at the feeling of your lips on his. His hands made their way from your waist to the back of your thighs. Tapping his hands on the back of them was your cue to jump and wrap them around his waist. He had been able to tell when his hands were at your waist that you had lost weight, but it still shocked him how much lighter you felt to him. He still found you as beautiful as the day he met you, but he felt even more guilt that you hadn’t been properly taking care of yourself. You were stressed out and worried about him. He poured as much love as he could into the kiss. He missed your touch, the way that it would make his heart race. He missed the taste of your chapstick on your lips, peppermint. He missed the scent of your body wash, something floral, but not overpowering, soft like you. He kissed you at that moment as if he were repenting for every single sin he had ever committed. He kissed you until you were both breathless. Your foreheads rested against each other as you gathered your breaths.
“The, uh, rolls are done.” Bucky is the first to speak, his voice a bit gravely.
You let out a chuckle before capturing his lips in one more kiss, a soft and sweet one.
“Join me? I’m not going to be able to eat that all by myself. We could watch a movie or something if you want.” You say hopefully, a little scared that he’ll bolt. You know this is usually the time he goes out for his run before heading into the gym a couple floors down in the tower. You can see that part of him wants to decline, but he steels himself for a split second.
“Yeah, go pick a movie and get it started, I’ll dish out dinner.” He spoke softly. You walked over to the stack of DVD’s and picked out one of the romantic comedies that you both loved before popping it into the DVD player. Bucky sat the plates that your bowls and rolls sat on onto the table before taking a seat on the couch. You sat down beside him before turning and setting your legs across his lap and tossing the blanket over the both of you. Bucky handed you your dinner before picking his up and you both ate in companionable silence while watching the movie. As the credits roll at the end of the movie you could see Bucky fighting sleep.You get up which seems to stir him from his half-asleep state and take his hands in yours to lead him to your shared bedroom. You go to the dressed and pull out your pyjamas and when you turn around you notice that he’s pulling out his gym clothes.
“Buck, what are you doing?” You ask him, a bit of exasperation leaking into your voice.
“Just gonna hit the gym for a little bit,” he says with his eyes to the floor. “Don’t wanna get soft on ya. Besides, I’ll be back before you can miss me.” He says as he shuts the bedroom door behind you. It isn’t until your front door closes that you release your thought to the now empty room..
“That’s the problem Bucky, I already do.” You feel your eyes begin to burn with tears that want to flow down your cheeks, releasing pent up frustration. The lump in your throat thick. You make your way to the bathroom and decide to take a long hot shower. You play music from your phone that matches your mood and turn on the bluetooth speaker before stepping into the steaming shower. Your tears finally break free and sobs begin to escape you. You know that Bucky is the kind of person to be strong for everyone else, to bottle up his emotions, but you couldn’t help but feel like you were failing him. Old insecurities were bubbling their way to the surface and you worried that you were being too clingy and pushing him away and that maybe he just needed space, or that he was falling out of love with you, but then you remembered that kiss from earlier. You knew these thoughts were illogical, but that didn’t stop them from making you freak out. When the water began to cool down you quickly washed your body and hair before getting out of the shower. You felt tired after letting out the pent-up-emotion. Instead of putting on the pajamas you had gotten out earlier you grabbed a fresh pair of panties and another shirt of Bucky’s before drying off and putting them on. You crawled into bed, and for the first time, you didn’t wait for Bucky to join you.
Bucky felt terrible when he left the bedroom he shared with you, but he also knew that if he didn’t go workout, especially after the accidental nap, he would be waking you with one of his nightmares and he couldn’t risk hurting you or stressing you out further because of them. So he headed a couple floors down in the tower to the gym. He made his way to the treadmill putting on his headphones and turning his music up. He ran twenty-five miles before he made his way over to the punching bag. With the skin on his knuckles broken like the punching bag in front of him, Bucky heads to the showers before making his way back upstairs. He lets the water run over his face and down his back as he moves his head forward. He quickly showers as he remembers the sound of your voice earlier. You were annoyed. You had every right to be. You deserved a man that would wrap you in his arms every night. A man that wasn’t still terrified of his own mind, of what he could potentially do to you when coming out of a nightmare. A man that would allow himself to be vulnerable with you like you were hoping he would be. With guilt and disappointment in himself, he gets out of the shower and gets dressed before making his way back to your shared apartment. He makes his way into the dark bedroom. He realizes that you didn’t even try waiting up for him this time. Tears threaten to spill as the salty water burns his eyes. He quietly makes his way to the dresser and pulls out his plaid pajama pants and changes into them before climbing into bed carefully not to wake you up.
You open your eyes confused as to what woke you up. You notice it is still dark out, no sign of dawn in sight and then you hear it. A whimper. You look towards Bucky’s side of the bed and see in the moonlight that his face is contorted in pain or fear. He’s gripping the sheets so tightly that his knuckles are white except for the spots of intense crimson where they had broken open earlier.
“No. No, no, no, no, no, no.” Bucky pleads to no one in the room. You quickly realize that he’s deep within a nightmare. You lay a gentle hand on his chest while keeping the rest of you to the side of him in case he bolted forward.
“Bucky. Bucky, baby, wake up.” You say to him gently, but loud enough to try and rouse him. Except he lets out a guttural scream that makes you jump a little from the unexpectedness of it. It had never got this bad before. The scream he let out was so loud you were a little worried that Steve heard it from his floor above you. Even though you know that it was probably ill-advised, you moved so that you had a leg on either side of Bucky’s hips. Both hands lightly on his chest to steady yourself you move them to his upper arms, gripping them just enough that if he moved you wouldn’t go flying anywhere but he could still move.
“Bucky, c’mon, c'mon wake up for me. Please!” You receive no response but his head continues moving back and forth.
“James!” You nearly shout.
At this he bolts forward. His metal hand around your throat. His eyes scan the room before he really comes to. He gasps as he realizes his hand is around your throat because you had tried to wake him from a bad night terror. He scrambles backwards his eyes wide and his chest is rapidly rising and falling.
You give him a minute to collect himself before you reach out to him. You see him flinch as if your touch would burn him and you stop for a minute and switch tactics.
“You didn’t hurt me.” You speak softly. I see him close his eye tightly before he speaks.
“I had my hand wrapped around your throat.” He takes deep breaths to calm himself, whether it’s from the night terror still or from annoyance at your comment, you have no idea.
You look him over and see that his knuckles were bleeding. With a sigh, you get up from the foot of the bed and stand in front of him before brushing your fingers against his. His eyes shoot wide open, but he doesn’t move.
“Let me clean up your knuckles at least. Please.” You plead him, your fingertips just a hair above his, aching to be laced within his. He gulps before nodding his head. You move your way towards the bathroom, Bucky following behind you. You have Bucky lean against the bathroom sink as you grab the first aid kit from the cupboard and move to stand with his right leg between yours. You pull out an antiseptic wipe and begin dabbing at his knuckles. Bucky hisses from the sting at the first contact.
“Sorry,” you say, barely above a whisper.
“S’okay,” he mutters in return.
You continue cleaning his knuckles until the wipe is a pale pink color and his knuckles are clean. You grab some ointment from the first aid kit and carefully dab it onto the broken skin before you bandage his knuckles so the ointment doesn’t get all over the place. You then wrap your arms around him and lay your head directly over his heart, listening to the steady thump.
“I don’t deserve you,” Buck, mumbles, almost quietly enough for you not to hear him.
“What?” You say shocked taking a step back, your hands remaining on his waist, and your eyebrows scrunched together in confusion.
“I don’t deserve you. I’m a monster. I could have accidentally killed you tonight.”
“You wouldn’t though.”
“God, you don’t know that for sure (Y/N)! I couldn’t live with myself if I hurt you, let alone get you killed because I can’t keep my shit together.”
“You wouldn’t hurt me. HYDRA made you hurt innocent people, but it wasn’t you because if you had a choice in the matter you would have told them to get bent. Besides, I knew that it probably wasn’t the best idea of how to wake you up but I couldn’t stand hearing you in pain like that.”
“But it was me!”
“Would you think that if it were me in your position and you in mine?”
“Wha- no!”
“Then why is it any different for you? If it was you, then nothing would have changed after you were out from under their control. If it were you, Steve wouldn’t be alive right now. If it were you, I would be dead right now and we wouldn’t be having this conversation. It was not you.” You had stepped closer to him and you could feel his breath across your face. You stared straight into his ocean blue eyes that were beginning to brim with tears.
“I just keep waiting for the moment that you see me as a monster like they do, as I do. The moment that you’ll wisen up and leave for your own safety. I’m terrified to lose you, Doll, and every day I just keep seeing more victims that are dead from my hands. A-and you see it, the pictures and videos, and you listen to the details, and I don’t understand why you stay. I knew that I’d probably get nightmares from it all again so I started going to bed late, getting up early, and working out because if I’m too tired to dream then you wouldn’t have to deal with that at least. But then I noticed that you’re hardly eating from all the stress of the case and trying to take care of me and I felt terrible for that. Then I would feel even more terrible because you would try and wait up for me every night, but you’d fall asleep before I’d get to bed because you were so tired. And, God, I missed you. I missed holding you, the smell of your shampoo, your lips on mine, but I just felt like I didn’t deserve it, and God, I’m just so sorry for hurting you. I never wanted to hurt you.” Bucky says breathless breaking down into sobs. You wrap your arms tightly around him as if you could hold the broken pieces of him together. Rubbing your hand up and down his back trying to do anything soothing to help him.
“It’s okay, baby, I forgive you. I know you never meant to hurt me. You would never intentionally hurt me. I love you. I love you so much. Nothing some dumb prosecutor says is gonna change that, okay? They could present all the evidence in the world, but I know the kind of person you are Bucky. I know who you are. You’re a softie under that tough exterior of yours. I’m in this for the long haul, and I knew what I was getting into when we started this. I’m not gonna run at the first sign of trouble, but I do think we need to talk a bit more about the things that worry us. I was stressed, and I was stressed because I was worried about you. I was worried whether you would start having nightmares again, and then I was worried that I never saw you. I should have handled the stress a bit better than I did though. I knew that I should have stopped replacing meals with coffee, I just elected to ignore it, and that was my bad. And I missed you too. That’s why I tried waiting up for you. Bucky, you deserve the world. I don’t know a single person that would make it through what you’ve been through. You have. Healing isn’t linear though, you’re gonna have bad days, but you’ve gotta let me in a little bit on those bad days, okay? Even if it’s just saying that it’s a bad day. ‘Cause I wanna be here for you through all of it. I love you, Bucky Barnes. I love you so much, and we’re gonna get through this together, but if you need to hear right now, then I forgive you.”
At your speech, Bucky pulls you down to the bathroom floor and you cry in each other’s arms. You both sit there for about an hour whispering “I love you’s” to each other, occasionally kissing each other, soft and sweet. You both stay there until your tears begin to dry up, both of your faces blotchy, and your eyes bloodshot from the sudden onslaught of sobs and pent up emotion trying to remain strong for the other. Eventually, you start to shiver from the cold bathroom floor, and with ease, Bucky picks you up bridal style and carries you to the bed where he holds you through the night. You never have to wait up for him to go to bed after that.
Summary: Only when he met you did Bucky really start to feel again.
Prompt: “Just kiss me already”
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Warnings: Intense fluff, loving and healing Bucko, nothing else!
Word Count: 1.9k
A/N: A fic in which Bucky is so in love with you in a way he’s never experienced before and it consumes him. A poetic, soft, healing Bucko that melts me. All for the extraordinary @coffee-with-bucky Writing Challenge! I hope you enjoy darling!!
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He had been left cold and numb for so long. Every touch was immediately forgotten, every cut and bruise and broken bone ignored. It had to be like that for him survive. The Asset. The Winter Soldier.
He didn’t feel the heat or the cold or the wind or the snow; he felt only the need to complete the mission. The biting dry wind and the icy scape which he arrived back to time and time again was nothingness to him. Not even the blood that dripped on his hands, red and thick, was felt.
Bits and pieces came back to the man who had been stifled under all that once he was free of that life. Faces of those he murdered. Those horrific acts he did. But true feeling didn’t.
He spent his time wondering then accepting that whatever Hydra did to him and however they altered him, was permanent. The numb and the void and the nothingness inside him was there to stay.
So burning his tongue on coffee became a regular occurence, always eyeing the liquid for a time before taking a first sip to the curious but unquestioning eyes of Steve. No one, not even his friend, could truly understand why.
Training with the Black Widow, he only knew something was wrong when her mask broke, shock on her face as a bone snapped or blood poured through his broken skin. He wouldn’t feel the heat of the blood or the dripping liquid down his face or arm or leg, continuing the fight blinding until she stopped it.
On missions he didn’t feel the cold in his bones or sun on his face or wind on his skin. He could remain in the same cramped position for hours, waiting for an enemy to appear, crouched and silent. He could get shot and keep moving. Stabbed and keep fighting. Beaten and still beat back.
But then something simple happened. Something insignificant and mundane on the surface, but extraordinary underneath.
You walked into the room. And immediately his entire world changed.
The party was twinkling with bright laughter and the clinking of champagne flutes, soft music and soft dances to accompany it. The warmth in the air was weaved between men and women in delicate wisps, the glow of delight catching in the faces and eyes of those there.
It was beautiful and it was completely lost on Bucky, seeing the world as he always had, as though it could never touch him. Never be real for him. Never be for him.
But you walked into the grand room in a green dress, your gown long and velvet and smile small and bright. Your eyes gleamed as though they danced in perfect and delicate little steps like that of the guests surrounding you. And with a mere look the glass that separated Bucky from the world shattered at the sight of you.
It was a timeless moment, the past and future falling away and leaving nothing but the present. Nothing but you, in that moment. The party itself fell away. The people there no longer existed. Nothing did.
Nothing but you.
You.
Who were you?
Bucky swallowed as you moved, as you greeted and smile and laughed. God, your laugh was a song that he had never heard but somehow knew by heart. One that he had been trying to remember since the day he was born, the echo of it just on the edge of his mind and tip of his tongue. Hearing it now clicked that melody, that champagne light sound into place in his mind hereafter.
“What is she?” Bucky heard himself say through the buzz in his ears, your unsung lullaby instantly dazing him.
The word goddess came to mind, an Aphrodite of love and beauty manifested before him.
An angel.
A mirage.
A miracle.
“Civilian,” Steve responded simply, watching his friend try and decipher you. “A friend. She’s a good anchor for us, reminding us of the people we do this all for.”
Catching eyes with Steve you walked toward him, the sparkle of the low lights in your eyes somehow brighter than the source, shining and glistening.
“Y/N,” greeted Steve warmly, his arms wrapping around you as though it was insignificant to touch something as celestial as you. “You’ve been missed around here.”
You laughed again, that easy lullaby smoothing the rough edges of Bucky’s soul, a balm taking hold and antidote to the years of nothingness he had felt before this night.
Y/N, he thought to himself, slow and gentle in his mind, careful with the word as though the charge of caring for it was passed to him.
Your name was a word that would entrance his tongue to whisper it over and over in darkness later that night in the solitude of his room. Trying to sleep and failing because he was thinking of you. The sound of your name coming from his lips would cover him like a blanket. It wrapped him up and filled his body with a pleasant heat.
But in that moment of meeting you, it was a shock of heat to his system, as though he had never felt warm before in his life.
“This is my friend, Bucky,” Steve introduced, turning the full tender force of your presence on him.
“Hello Bucky, it’s good to meet you,” you said.
Your voice was the the smoothest voice he had heard, but it somehow rattled inside him, gaining strength and wracking down to his bones and deeper.
It felt like that vibration you gave off connected somewhere in his soul too. It was a place little visited, little tended to, but like an early summer wind the dust stirred and life was breathed back into him.
A hand was reached out to him- yours, so little compared to his- and instantly he was afraid. Afraid to break it, afraid of the roughness of his palms to yours. But he was more afraid that if he took your hand, he would never let it go.
His hand grasped yours, unable to look away from the connection of your skin touching his. An electric fire burned it, searing the memory of his first touch of you. It cascade up his arm, under his skin and through his veins, spreading out and filling his whole body. He could feel his skin flush red and his heart race. He could feel his muscles and bones ache to move closer, to feel more of your skin on his.
It was the most biting and beautiful anguish he had ever felt.
Or, had he ever truly felt anything before this moment? Bucky didn’t think so, didn’t think that before this moment he was anything at all. You gave him life in this moment, your small hand in his. You sparked and set on fire a warmth and life he hadn’t experienced before.
“Bucky?” you asked, watching him as he watched you, his hand holding yours as though unable to let go.
It gave him pause, the idea of breaking this connection with you. It was the first time he had ever truly felt this- or any- way, and how could he be expected to give it up so quickly? He looked to his thumb, gently and subtly moving across your smooth skin.
Don’t make me let go, Y/N.
You tilted your head, leaning into him to catch his eyes and attention away from your hand holding his. It wasn’t just his attention he would give you if you wanted. You could have all of him if you asked. Every last piece. Anything to remain in your presence. Anything at all to simply be near. To simply hold hands.
Champagne and whiskey and scotch could never do for Bucky what your eyes did to him now, blinking slow through lovely lashes, a soft and knowing smile following.
“Would you like to dance with me?” you asked, an instant type of drunkeness taking hold at your words.
Bucky didn’t respond- couldn’t respond- to that, only able to step up to you, moving you closer to the dance floor without hesitation. He didn’t know when he danced last, had no desire too. His only desire was you.
He should have placed one hand on your waist and taken your other hand in his. But his body reacted apart from the social norm. He held you on the dance floor to the slow jazz music, drown out by the sound of your breathing and beat of your heart pressed to his. His arms were held around you gentle and firm as though holding something impossibly dear and impossibly close. Yours you wrapped slowly around him, one resting in his hair, the other on his back.
Holding you like this, holding you so close, there was nothing he could do but feel the sensation that was you.
You were a flame- a heat in the middle of winter- and every movement you made and word you spoke fanned those flames. You lit up and warmed every corner of every room. Bucky was sure if he could peel his eyes off of you for a moment that he would see the orange flames of you flickering in his own eyes. He would never know though. He would never be able to break his eyes away from you. He just knew he would crumble to ash if he did.
“Y/N,” he whispered your name, almost to himself, wanting to say the word out loud.
“Yes?” you responded immediately, your head moving to look up at your enraptured partner.
In doing so your lips almost touched his, and he could have sworn he saw the same spark he felt light in your eyes too. He couldn’t help but smile: at the spark he saw, at the spark he felt, and how you didn’t pull back or pull away. Everyone did. Everyone always did.
But you stayed held to him, delicately pink lips just below his own, expression as soft as you felt in his arms.
“Will you dance with me after this song?” he asked quietly to you. You had only just started dancing, but he couldn’t wait to ask you.
“Yes, Bucky,” you said, smile growing to match his.
You closed your eyes, pressing into him just under his jawline. Soon your nose soothing moved against his skin to the rhythm of the music, Bucky’s hand moving to thread his fingers into your hair and his breath cascading down your cheek and neck. And with every inhale he breathed in your warmth and sweetness, forgetting anything before you.
It was as though you were a warm, smokey honey. You were notes of floral, beautiful and wild and soft. You were smokey, rich and deep and smooth like whiskey, You were so warm, the heat radiating off of you like the waves of a hot spring, drowning him and pulling him under with every wash of the water, every word from your mouth, every soft glance from your eyes.
“And Y/N?” he whispered to you.
“Hmm?” you hummed peacefully, caught up in the feelings of his arms.
“Will you dance with me to every song tonight?”
There was a pause where your movement stopped and he waited, wondering how he could ever break apart from you now that he found you.
“I will, Bucky,” you whispered back to him, nuzzling deeper and erupting another wave of heat in him, your words like honey.
“Y/N?” he whispered again, this time feeling the breathy chuckle on his neck, hearing that lullaby of yours in his ears. It sent a shiver of pleasure through him, making you feel that way in his arms.
“Bucky,” You looked up to him this time, your nose against his and lips practically touching his as you spoke, making his breath hitch. “Just kiss me already?”
Breath held in his chest, Bucky breached the distance between you, pressing his lips to yours as though the desire for this had been a lifetime in waiting.
You tasted sweeter than honey.
You felt hotter than fire.
And he knew, even if there was physical distance between you, he would never let you go.
_______
A/N: That moment when you buy smoked honey from a winery and think “there’s a fic here”. This is my life guys. Please let me know if this unhealthy obsession is worth it?
A/N: Based on the prompt “I’m in love with you, asshole!” for @coffee-with-bucky ‘s writing challenge.
First of all, THIS IS SO LATE, I’m sure most of you think I’m dead, but HERE I AM, and finally posting the end of this series I loved writing so much! I think it’s a bit long but I’m sure you will enjoy it! At least I hope so!
Series masterlist | Complete masterlist
Rebblogging and feedback are always welcome and appreciated! Tagging for a permament list is open!
Previously:
“You know, this late night reminds me of last year…I guess it was Thanksgiving, am I wrong?” You widen your eyes, still looking at your screen and after taking a deep breath you turn to see him, wearing his usual smirk, waiting for your response.
“I am not discussing last year’s Thanksgiving.”
“Oh, so you remember?” He asks, faking surprise.
You let out a scoff and reply, “Of course I remember, I don’t have the memory of a fish, but I don’t want to talk about it.” You resume your former position, your whole body facing him so he can see you’re dead serious.
“Well, we haven’t talked about it at all, but why is that?” He knits his brows and narrows his eyes in the most sarcastic, smug manner.
“We work together, and it was…not a big deal.” You shrug as you hear your voice a little bit higher by the end of the sentence.
*Back to present day*
“Well, if it’s not a big deal we could talk about it.” You stare for a moment, actually considering his words.
“Bucky, that was months ago, what could we possibly say?” You ask as you cross your arms in question and get up from your chair, striding towards the couch of your office, finally deciding that you’re not working anymore tonight.
“I have a couple of questions, actually.” He shrugs as he keeps drinking his huge latte, following you across the place. You shake your head and roll your eyes at him, sadly surrendering to his petitions.
“Alright,” You shrug. “I have no clue on what to do with my design so we might as well be entertained. What do you want to know?” He remains silent for a moment and your heart starts beating faster in anticipation. He sits beside you, your bodies facing each other, and you prop your elbow on the back rest of the couch.
“Can I ask any question?”
“You can ask but I’m not sure I will answer it.” You reply making him chuckle and bite his lip in amusement.
“Okay, first one, do you regret it?” The soft expression he’s holding makes the short thought you had about lying fade away, he looks genuinely interested, as if he’s hoping you’ll answer what he would.
You stare for a moment, and take a deep breath before answering, “I don’t.” You shake your head in reassurance. “Not at all.” You add as if it wasn’t clear. “Do you?”
“Of course not.” He replies in half a second, with the most sincere expression on his face. The way your heart skips a beat would expose you if he could hear it, and you swallow to gain composure and move on.
“Next question.” You give him a small smile and he blinks rapidly as if his mind went elsewhere for a moment.
“Oh, um…how…how was it?” he frowns as if he’s unsure of asking but he already blurted out the words so he might as well just wait. You chuckle at his goofiness, if someone heard the way he sounded, they wouldn’t believe how he’s so straight forward most of the time.
“You know, I thought that one was going to be the first one.” He gives you a toothy grin, and it only reminds you of that night, the way he looked at you all blushed and glowing, he looked so happy, you would never forget it…
“Um, it…was…amazing.” A huge grin appears on your face almost immediately and his eyes are fixed on your features as he can’t wrap his head around the fact that you didn’t hesitate to say it, that you probably enjoyed it as much as he did. “It was the greatest night, Bucky.” Your mind is flooded by the flashbacks of both of you walking out of the building, laughing and talking, kissing in the back of the taxi cab as you arrived to the pizza place he praised so much. All the images appear in your mind again, eating together on the booth at the corner of the otherwise empty room and staring into each other’s eyes as if the world depended on it.
“Wow.” He says lowly, with a look in his eyes that tells you his mind was where yours was. “I—I haven’t had that much fun since that night, it was the best thanksgiving ever.”
“I know.” You know you’re smiling in the dumbest way at the moment, and you know he notices it, but you don’t care because bringing back those memories, and finally talking about them with him is probably the best idea you’ve had in a really long time. He slides on the couch slightly, so he’s now closer to you, gazing at you with what you would call adoration and admiration, all of this is too new for you, you’re not even sure what it means. But you know one thing: you want to kiss him, right this moment, and you have no apparent reason to refrain from doing it. You lean over so you’re closer to him and fix your gaze on his; his eyes speak louder than anything he could possibly say at the moment, he wants to kiss you too. Your heart beats faster in anticipation and he licks his lips as if he knew that was your weakness the last time this happened, and gives you a smirk you could either slap out of his face or kiss so it fades away, but clearly, you’ve made up your mind. You reach at his nape and caress his skin as he places a hand on your thigh, squeezing it gently and you press your lips against each other’s, closing your eyes and diving right into the moment. He draws his hand to your cheek and strokes it gently, and you couldn’t care less if he feels your skin catching on fire; he smiles against your lips and then pulls away, making you release an unwanted whimper from your lips. His cheeks are pink and warm, and you keep caressing his skin and locks at his nape. He stares with a goofy grin, a look of peace and comfort plastered all over his face.
“I needed to know what I felt that day wasn’t a onetime thing.” He speaks hoarsely, clearing his throat right after. You chuckle childishly, and look down for a second, placing your hand over the one he still has over your thigh.
“It’s good to double check sometimes.” You reply looking up at him. “So,”
“So,” He sighs deeply and pecks your lips again.
“What happens now?” You bite your lip as your eyes travel all over his features, you’ve always known he’s attractive, but right now, he’s glowing, he’s right where he has to be, where he wants to be, and the happiness that radiates off him makes him look better than ever.
“I—don’t know, I just know I want to stay with you, move this to the lounge and not get home tonight.” His voice is so low and husky, it’s a sound you could never say no to. “What do you say?”
“I say they just bought new couches for the lounge and I think they’re really comfortable.” He scoffs at your smooth ways of replying to what he asks you, and he draws his hands to tuck your hair behind your ears, caressing your cheeks on their way down. He stands up, holding out his hand for you to take it and stand up, and you kiss his cheek slowly, noticing how his cheeks turn another shade of pink right after. You lead the way out of your office, not letting go of his hand you stop as you step into the hall, facing him, and he stares at you questioningly.
“What is it, doll?”
“Are you sure about this?”
“Why, of course I am, I’ve thought about this since last year, even before Thanksgiving.” He shrugs and draws a hand to your cheek, caressing it with his knuckles. You’re mesmerized by the way the soft lighting of the hall makes his skin look as smooth as silk and all blushed and glowing.
You speak an extremely low okay and offer him a rather shy smile. You turn around to keep walking and he hugs you from behind, nuzzling your neck forcing you to laugh because his stubble tickles you. It is so quiet, as you walk down the hall, well, except for the loud chuckles you let out as he keeps tickling you. For a moment, you stop and tell Bucky you need to get rid of your heels, and your feet are grateful when they come in contact with the soft rug, and he can’t help but laugh at the way you become even smaller than him.
“Oh, God, you look even more adorable like that.” He says after releasing a heartfelt laughter, surrounding your body with his arms.
“I am not adorable, it’s not my fault you’re so big!” You reply and reach up to kiss him, but he just leans over to pretend he’ll kiss you and then pulls away, making you fake offense as he runs past you like a kid at a playground.
You run after him along the hallways, passing by everybody else’s office and past the newbies cubicles until you get to the door of the lounge. It’s closed, but you know he’s in there, and you step in, slowly and stealthy, though he wouldn’t hear you without your heels. You walk by the book shelf at the entrance and then you feel his hands around your waist, turning you around to face him. You let out a whimper when he startles you, and he laughs loudly, the sound echoing in the place.
“You’re like an 8 year old.” You shake your head in disbelief and rest your hands on his chest. The warmth with which his eyes rest on you never fades, it’s like it has always been there but you never noticed. So much for attention to detail in the fashion business.
That night, at 3 am, you agreed to go back home, as reluctant as both of you were, because even if on Saturdays people got to work later, you wanted to leave no trace of anyone staying there late, and you wanted to keep the magic and the mystery of what would happen the morning after. You got home with your mind flooded with images of you and Bucky laughing, talking and kissing on the couch. The sound of his laugh is now recorded in your head and you can still feel his hands against your skin, warm and soft, just like his eyes every time they stared at you after each kiss. You lick your lips as you remember the taste of coffee and cinnamon you tasted off his lips and smile as you stare through the window wishing this night hadn’t come to an end. His murmurs while you rested your head on his chest still resonate in your ears, ‘You know, I have never trusted someone the way I trust you’; ‘I feel so comfortable when you’re around.’ His hums of approval as you caressed his scalp and played with his hair are fixed on memory for good; his hands gently massaging your shoulders after he insisted that you have been under too much stress lately, and the sound of his voice, his breath fanning against your ear as he kept telling you about his early years when he had just moved to New York. You couldn’t have had a more magical night, you even thought about not going to bed so you wouldn’t have to wake up alone with your memories, even confused if it had been real or just a dream.
/
Getting to work had never been so exciting, well, except for your first day, but today was different. You got up at the first beep of your alarm, and as the dim sunlight of an early day hit your skin, you smiled at the thought of seeing him, of hearing his voice and laughing with him.
You got up from the bed already thinking of his smug smirk with those crooked teeth you find so adorable, those permanently shiny blue eyes, and what it would be like to kiss him not caring if someone is watching. You wondered what he’d do and what his smart mouth will speak when he saw you.
You even planned on taking a small break and dragging him to the lounge for a moment to yourselves, of talking things through and maybe making out for a while, after last night, one kiss means no harm.
And oh, how fun lunch time will be! Walking out of the building together and finding the perfect place to eat and have some time to relax and laugh some more. Maybe you’ll get some pizza just like last year, but wherever you go, you can’t wait to see him walk into your office and light up your day.
You prepared your coffee, took a shower and got dressed for what would be a completely new, different and uncertain day. You didn’t know if you would talk about it, but you wanted to because the last time something like this happened, you spent months without discussing it and even if you tried to repress it, it was killing you.
Besides, you weren’t in the mood of driving so you took an Uber to get to work, you paid off the driver and you tipped him rather generously due to your good mood.
/
Sitting in front of your laptop, you hit SEND E-MAIL after you decided that you’re going to risk sending the design even if it wasn’t 100% convincing for you, but you had to trust your talent from time to time.
You sigh deeply and rest your back against your chair, and feel a knot in your stomach when you see Bucky walk into your office, wearing a ridiculously attractive smirk and holding two cups of what you guess are lattes. You offer him a rather big smile and watch him as he places both lattes on your desk and pulls a roll chair to sit beside you.
“Good morning.” That’s all you manage to say as you face him.
“Good morning to you, too.” He smiles and bites his lip. He stares at you with shiny, warm, blue eyes and doesn’t seem to want to stop.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” You ask, releasing a chuckle.
“You look really beautiful today.”
“That smile plastered on your face suits you quite well.” He laughs and his stubble cheeks instantly turn pink, melting your heart. “Thanks for the coffee, I really needed it.” You reach up to caress his cheek.
“I know, I heard you had a long night.” He shrugs, making you laugh this time.
“You seem quite rested and I heard you had a long night too.”
“I just had a great time, when I got home I couldn’t sleep ‘cause I was feeling too excited to see you today.”
You scoff and bite your lip, staring at him for a moment. “I didn’t know you could speak like that.” You shake your head. “But I could get used to it.” You lean over to kiss him but the message tone of his phone interrupts you.
“Ignore that.” He murmurs and pecks your lips, but he keeps getting texts and you pull away and sit up straight. You glance at his phone for a second only to find a girl’s name on the screen and about eight texts from her. By what your eyes could catch, she really wants to see him today.
“You can answer them.” You say with a rather serious tone.
“It’s not important, I’ll just—”
“Go ahead, I’ll be outside.” You stand up from your chair, and walk out of your office and head to the lounge to wrap your head around the fact that you fell blindly and completely for his games, for sweet words he probably told every other girl. You sit on the couch and let out a deep breath, running a hand through your hair in frustration.
After some moments of trying to clear your head, you realize you shouldn’t be hiding in here, you should be out there talking to him like grown-ups, after all, you never really decided what was going to happen, did you?
You stand up and walk to the door, but you’re startled by Bucky opening it right before you.
“Y/N, come on, let’s talk.” You take a step backwards and let him in, closing the door again.
“You know, James, I actually believed everything, everything that happened last night, earlier today, and now I feel like an idiot.” You speak as you sit on the couch.
“Y/N, please, don’t call me James, it’s like you don’t know me.” He says sitting beside you.
“Well, apparently I don’t.” You shrug. “Because I had no idea who the heck Jess is, or why she is texting you so desperately to meet you tonight.”
“She’s nobody, okay? She’s into me, I’ll accept that, but I’m not into her, Y/N.”
“I shouldn’t even be making a problem out of this, you and I…”
“What? You’re going to say that you and I are not a thing and that’s why you shouldn’t care.” You nod almost unnoticeably and cross your arms on your chest, trying to find an answer.
“It’s true…isn’t it?” You reply in a lower voice and a knot in your throat.
“No, Y/N!” He whisper-yells, running a hand through his hair. “I care about you and…I swear, I wasn’t trying to make that girl believe anything that’s not true.” He pauses for a moment. “I haven’t felt the way I felt last night…ever.”
You stare at him for a moment and take a deep breath before speaking.
“What did it mean to you? What does that mean for us? Bucky, I…”
“I had the night of my life, Y/N.” He interrupts abruptly. You put your arms down and he takes your hand in his, caressing your knuckles. “I haven’t felt the way I feel with you in so long…I don’t want to lose you.”
“You see, James,” You say, releasing from his hold. “You say things like those and then…you’re…you’re afraid to say what you actually want to say, but I’m not.” You shake your head and fix your eyes on his as you realize how his expression changes. It had relaxed for a second when you let him take your hands, but now it’s stiff again, hesitant.
“What are you talking about?” He frowns, and the frustration that hasn’t left you makes you stand up from the couch and walk towards the door, but he’s quick to stand up behind you and grab your arm before you open the door.
“Y/N,” He places his hand on your shoulder and gently makes you turn to see him.
“I’m in love with you, asshole!” You speak with a chuckle, as if it were something he had to know before you said it. “How could you not see it? This whole time…before Thanksgiving I tried so hard to hide it, but after that night, you didn’t get one hint?” You add rather frustrated, and you’re even more annoyed when you see a smile creeping up his lips in amusement. “What?”
“I guess I was falling too hard for you that I just couldn’t wrap my head around the idea of you feeling the same way.” He shrugs. You stare for a moment, unable to believe your ears and as you part your lips to speak, he beats you to it. “I love you, Y/N, and I’m not afraid to say it…I was just afraid that you didn’t love me back.” Your eyes drop to his lips and you press your lips to his in a second; he quickly rests his hands on your waist, sliding them so they reach your back and he presses your body against his. Your hands rest on his chest, and you smile against his lips when you realize how fast his heart is beating, and how his body radiates some type of warmth that embraces your body and makes you feel like the luckiest girl alive. His soft, wet lips part from yours for a moment when he needs to breathe again.
“What’s wrong?” You frown as you look him in the eye and tuck a strand of hair behind his ear.
“Nothing,” He says softly. “I just…hadn’t realized that…I’m so lucky to have you in my life.” His thumb caresses your cheek and he smiles lazily, and his eyes are so bright.
“You were way too slow to see that.” You joke, making him chuckle.
“You can’t give me a break, can you?”
“Buck, you have no idea.” You shake your head and peck his lips. “I love you.”
“I love you.” He murmurs and presses his lips against yours; the rest of your Saturday tasks long forgotten.
In celebration of hitting a milestone, I decided to host a writing challenge. I always wanted to do one of these and I love reading and spreading the love of other’s stories and creations!
I wanted to step into 2019 on a positive note and quickly say thank you to all of my followers and mutuals. I never would have thought that this blog would connect me with such sweet and kind people within this community and I can't thank everyone enough!
Rules before entering:
You do not need to be following me but I would appreciate it if you did!
Reblog this post!
Any Marvel characters with reader inserts of your choosing (Ex. Bucky Barnes x reader)
Any genre of your desire (Ex. Fluff, angst, AU’s, etc.) Smut included as long as it has the appropriate warnings and of course, no underage smut is allowed.
Can be written as a drabble, oneshot or series!
No minimum or maximum but if you go over 500 words, please use the ‘Keep Reading’ feature
One prompt per person but you can enter as many times as you like
Send me an ask with what prompt you want and what character you’re going to write about (Ex. #8 “A hug. That’s all I want” with Bucky)
Deadline is March 8th
Use the hashtag #lyns2019wc so I can reblog your work and also @ me in your work. If I haven’t reblogged it within 24 hours message me to let me know!
Most importantly have fun with this! If you have any questions don’t be afraid to send an ask or message me!
Dialogue prompts:
#1 “Can I twirl my knife in peace please?” @solisbucky w/ Bucky Barnes
For @coffee-with-bucky Writing Challenge! I hope you enjoy!
Alpha Bucky Barnes X Alpha Plus Size Reader
Warning: +18 ONLY! ABO Dynamics! SMUT! KNOTTING! ALL THAT KINKY CRAP!
A/N: Events take place after Avengers: Endgame. Reader is a frost giantess that was brought to Midgard by Thor during the chaos of Infinity War, may or may not do a back story to explain but that is the gest. This is sat in ABO verse, no one at the compound knows what the reader really is except for Thor. No one knows she is an alpha but assume she is a beta or possibly omega because she is female, but this make it the first time anyone has scented her heat. At the start of the story Bucky has hit his rut & has found his way to the readers floor. The rest is explained in the writing. Hope it makes sense as well.
Words: +3,500
“Open the door omega,” came the harsh gritty voice that Y/N recognized as Bucky, coming out of a once peaceful sleep thanks to the help of the noise canceling earbuds, body jittering as the thick framed woman sat up, the loud knocking making her realize the alpha was hitting his apex of his rut & hated to inform him, she wasn’t an omega.
“ ‘Mega! Open the door now,” came the demanding tone of an alpha that was commanding HIS omega followed by another loud hit to the door while pulling the earbuds free to look at the door surprised the alpha had scented her heat.
“ ‘Mega! Your alpha is speaking…,” the rutting alpha demanded with another harsh hit to the door before being jerked away by the guard that walked the floor, but betas had nothing on an enhanced alpha.
Y/N smirking as she got to bare feet to place the earbuds on the night stand, charming loose lounge clothes over once naked blue lined body to take time getting to the door as well as charming her senses to keep the metal armed alpha’s rut from affecting her heat. It shocked the giantess Bucky was able to scent her out like this, Y/N an alpha female that had heats compared to an omega as well as being mated like one as well.
Keen hearing picking up on a distinct disagreement & scuffle in the hallway. One that consisted of the metal armed soldier squabbling with the compound security that he shouldn’t be on this floor & to return to his own on the opposite end of the compound. Imperative that females & males have their own area to themselves for reasons such as this, a precaution.
“Bucky stop, you're…,” the giantess could hear the familiar voice of the alpha Steve begin from the end of the hall.
The jerking of the door getting everyone’s attention, Thor & Steve having just stepped foot on the floor to collect the rutting alpha who was having a rough go of it. The god himself hurrying forward the instant he realized whose door it was he stood at, knowing Y/N could easily take the soldier in one swift move.
“You took too long omega,” Bucky began, ignoring the protest of both Steve & Thor.
The brunet taking a step towards the thick famed woman who stood her ground in the doorway, his rut a slap in the face, damn the charm was doing no good. Y/E/C orbs studying Bucky as he moved forward but paused when Y/N wouldn’t budge.
Y/N allowing the soldiers calloused hand to reach out & cherish over soft neck. Heated finger tips feeling over the supple sun kissed skin, stepping closer to dip down to scent the woman’s glands, voice gritting, “you're in heat doll, you scent like cold steel, leather & honey. Let your alpha in sweet omega, let your alpha take care of you.”
Taking a step back, Y/N looked up into lust blown steel blue, keeping her skin the same sun kissed color they were used to. Y/E/C orbs looking back to Steve & Thor who stopped directly behind Bucky prepared to pull the two apart.
“She’s not an omega,” Thor spoke up.
Bucky locking gazes with the woman he knew was an accomplished warrior who had come to earth with Thor. Instinct telling the soldier the god maybe right, but rut played the soldier who possessively stepped up to the large framed woman that held up her hand signaling the other two alphas to stop.
“My omega,” Bucky growled getting to close to Y/N this time.
The brunet using his slightly larger mass to force the curvaceous woman back into the room but to his astonishment Y/N didn’t budge like expected, metal hand going to plump hip to pressure her to move obvious whatever HYDRA had done to the once gentle alpha made him overly aggressive. Bucky moving to scent over her glands along relaxed jaw once more, hot breath fanning over the soft flesh before Y/N’ cool hand slipped into auburn locks to jerk it away forcefully, using strength that he didn’t realize she possessed to back him stumbling into the hallway & slam the male alpha into the wall with a loud crack.
“Alpha, not omega,” Y/N snarled as the charm fell to reveal a red eyed frost giantess with ice blue skin littered with delicate lines attesting to her heritage as once Y/H/C tresses turned black, the soldier hit head on by the scent of alpha & female heat.
It was intense, the four alphas frozen as it finally dawned on Bucky that Y/N wasn’t the mate he had thought he was going for when he caught her heat from across the compound unable to understand why Steve or Thor weren’t going for Y/N & why was she blue?
A strong burning hand on cool shoulder made crimson orbs look back to Thor, “Y/N is Jotun, it's rare for her people to produce an omega of either sex & if they do they don’t survive the first few years of their life.”
Slowly, Y/N released the soldier, taking slow steps away, watching steel blue orbs flash in rage at the sight of Thor’ hand on clothed shoulder. Alpha instinct taking over, Bucky reaching for Y/N who was quick to grab the brunet before he laid hands on Thor, taking the rutting alpha to the ground, the females knee in his back & the soldier letting out a frustrated growl.
“Bucky stop,” Steve yelled as he & Thor jerked the alpha to his feet as Y/N released him & pulling him down the hall his eyes fixed on Y/N as he struggled to get free.
“No! Y/N is mine! Let go… she needs me,” Bucky yelled before Y/N disappeared into her room.
The instant the door shut the female alpha collapsed to the floor with the need for a knot before putting her charm back in place, having always been told she couldn’t be mated, too small, to young, no one would take to her or her heat. Though it seemed the rutting alpha that had come to her & was being drug back to the opposite side of the compound put all that in the trash. The giantess having been hiding her heat to the best of her abilities at the exact moment Bucky had begun his rut a few days ago.
Sitting back onto her heels Y/N looked around the dark room, truth be told she didn’t want to cover this up, it excited the young giantess having found her mate & like the inevitable it frightened her at the decision that needed to be made. Pushing to her feet, looking back to the door, not sure how this happened that she was to be mated to a Midgardian, but in all honesty didn’t care & her alpha needed her as much as she needed him.
Stepping into the rutting alphas quarters, noting he stood facing the wall of glass that over looked the grounds & not the city. Darkness swallowing them up as the door into the room shut gently, Y/N pausing to stand quietly by the door & watched him stiffen when the scent of heat washed over him from across the room. It was obvious the soldier was having problems keeping it together with the female alpha so close.
“They never told me you were an alpha… or that you went into heat… sorry I tried to take you like I did,” he breathed out, Y/N cautiously getting closer, the woman hardly ever spoke since having come there but seemed she communicated more with him than the others.
“It should have never mattered,” Y/N began taking a step closer to the alpha that finally turned to look at her watching the same blue skinned creature from earlier this time wearing a thin robe that did little to mask thick form, scenting her heat & daring to step closer.
Steady calloused hand reaching out to touch over the lines that followed her jaw, crimson eyes looking into perplexed blue ones that studied curvaceous form close, noting the look of apprehension at showing her true self. Eyes fluttering close at his gentleness, unable to recall another being as caring filling flesh fingers slip around to the nape of azure neck to ghost over the soft scar from the one & only time one had attempted to mate her, opening crimson orbs to note his puzzled look.
“He didn’t mate me, I killed him before he could knot me,” she explained making Bucky look at her closer before dipping to scent along soft jaw, no mate, just the scent of cold steel, leather & honey.
“You killed him,” Bucky asked carefully, knowing Y/N had the power to take him out moving to gaze into crimson orbs, the giantess witnessing no hate or fear, keeping flesh hand on the nape of soft neck, cherishing the scarred flesh to lay heated forehead to hers.
“He killed my brother, my mother & injured my father to get to me, he deserved it,” Y/N sighed out moving to scent along stubbled jaw to which he gladly presented before moving to lock gazes once more.
“My people are beasts when it comes to claiming mates,” she admitted surprised the soldier smiled at her still cherishing the scared flesh.
“This doesn’t bother me… alpha,” he breathed out pulling flush to the powder blue flesh not able to get enough of her scent, noting how it felt she ran hot but cool at the same time.
“Will you present for me,” Bucky drawled nose pressing into her glands as cool powder blue hand moved to his waist touching the hem of the shirt he wore gingerly as if afraid of hurting him.
“Not like your omegas,” Y/N admitted, finally taking in his rut that made slick begin to trickle down the inside of thick thighs, murmuring he scented of gunpowder, leather & warm steel.
“Will you mate with me? Be my alpha,” he breathed out, hot breath fanning over supple neck making Y/N’ need grow more than the bulge in his pants that was pressing into her, hand on her nape pulling lips close, a breath away so they would caress when one spoke.
“I'm not of Midgard… you shouldn’t even be…,” she began, stopping as he moved back to soft neck, nose buried in the glands at the base of her jaw & fangs raked over the supple flesh.
“I don’t care doll, your mine,” he spoke huskily over supple neck, a shiver working its way up azure spine, metal hand tugging the tie for the robe & helping her shrug out of it to pool at their bare feet.
Black vibranium limb snaking around thick middle to pull Y/N even tighter as calloused azure hands reached under the soldiers shirt to place clammy palms flat to taught abs, relishing in the feel of the tender flesh as a nip at tender neck had the giantess jolting slightly before moving back lock gazes.
“Want you alpha, need your knot,” Y/N spoke carefully, no plea an order.
“Mmmm, anything for you, my alpha,” Bucky growled out on cerulean lips, feeling her hands fall to the waist of his sweats to push them down over his hips for exceptional girth to spring free, indigo hand wrapping around it to elicit a growl & a buck.
“I want beg,” she smiled darkly.
The giantess giving throbbing cock another pump, feeling the knot already forming at the base & making the soldier growl out. Bucky smiling wide to show an impressive set of fangs as she done the same, a quick grab to thick thighs to spread them wide & hovering over eager cock. Blue arms wrapping around the male alphas neck to force their lips together in a fight of dominance while slowly impaling slick drenched cunt onto leaking, aching cock.
A moan gasped out as the soldier stumbled back into the glass wall, feeling him shiver at the cold that branded taught back through the shirt but not breaking the kiss as it was her turn to gasp, having realized just how well-endowed an alpha like Bucky was.
The giantess having to break the kiss to gasp out once seated on delicious cock that filled throbbing cunt in all ways she didn’t realize was possible, slick running down the thick shaft to coat his balls at the excitement it caused the creature in his arms.
“Fuck doll, you're…,” Bucky began as the females first orgasm hit.
The onslaught of ecstasy making curvaceous body seize against heated torso, only able to hold Y/N tight as powder blue arms wrapped tighter around his neck to bury her face into it with a whimpering plea for him to move as velvet cunt fluttered around throbbing cock, filling his knot grow more.
Ample hips moving as the first wave ebbed & the soldier began to move. Y/N regaining some composure to nip at the flesh on the brunets neck that would be carrying her mark & hoping he was prepared for the pain it would cause. The soldier shivering as he thrust into drenched cunt feeling it tightening once more, the giantesses body readying for another orgasm to wash over thick curves as his knot began to stretch juicy cunt, trying to slip it's way in.
“Want your knot,” Y/N whimpered against his throat, “want your cubs.”
“God baby, you have no idea how long I have waited to hear that,” the alpha growled.
With a one movement Bucky pushed off the glass to press Y/N’ bare cerulean back against it making her gasp out at the feel of the smooth surface & arch into the heated body that was pinning her. Ample hips rutting harder, chasing the orgasm that was washing over her once more making the giantess cry out this time, head falling back to the cold glass to expose tender neck to the male alphas fangs that raked over it making the female grind harder for his knot to knot finally push inside.
“Gonna make you mine, my alpha,” Bucky grunted out, picking up a punishing pace, desiring badly for knot to catch, to spill in clenching cunt, wanting to be locked together with his mate, fangs falling to soft azure flesh but waiting for her to tell him when.
“Fucking claim me alpha, I want beg,” Y/N cursed out, letting go a whimper as it seemed he didn’t need to be told twice, sharp fangs sinking into the tender flesh to taste cold, bitter copper.
The giantesses blood painting pink lips a deep blue as he pulled away to take cobalt lips, knot close to catching as he felt another orgasm getting ready to wash over her. Y/N relishing in the taste of her on his lips, Bucky pulling free to expose pale neck to her fangs curious if she would & without question she did.
Sharp fangs latching on & swearing the giantess was ripping his throat out as nails dug into taught shoulders, strong hips thrusting hard into clenching cunt as another orgasm took Y/N once more. The alpha males knot finally catching, propelling them both over the edge as she released to shout out to the room feeling throbbing cock spill into greedy womb to warm lower abdomen in ways she didn’t know was needed.
Thick thighs wrapped tightly around taught waist as he released them to keep from crushing the panting female alpha into the glass, arms anchored on either side of sweat beaded head to capture cobalt lips. Bucky tasting them both on her lips before pulling back to look at the mark he had graced her with, noting the blue blood. Flesh hand reaching up to smear the trickle that was flowing to the hollow powder blue neck, the azure creature wrapped around him, cunt still milking thick cock locked inside as it continued to spill.
“Let me go get my mate cleaned,” Bucky smiled, knowing it would be awhile before they were free, arms snaking under plump ass to hold quaking form close, arms wrapping around his neck to hold tight as the soldier stumbled out of the sweats & to the bathroom.
The soldier staggered into the shower with the giantess wrapped tight still & taking a seat on the floor of the shower after having cut it on. The concerned alpha sure that it was warm, unsure how his dazed mate liked it but the way she held to him told the alpha she was fine, glancing at her as he felt heritage lines begin to disappear.
“Don’t hide it doll, it's beautiful,” he breathed, prompting Y/N to reveal blue skin once more, steel blue orbs looking it over in the dim light that had come on when entering the bathroom, a setting the AI used for when the soldier first woke to get a shower.
“Anything for you alpha,” Y/N smiled, this time no order, no defiance, but happiness as she sat in his lap, tugging Bucky’ drenched t-shirt free to plop next to them, both still locked together as warm water rained over them steel blue orbs tracing heritage lines closely.
“God you're a gorgeous creature,” Bucky echoed, flesh hand reaching up to caress over soft azure cheek meeting crimson gaze, awe struck by burning cerise orbs, swearing he seen Y/N’ soul, “a beautiful creature that is all mine, my alpha, my mate.”
“By the gods alpha, I crave you badly still, my mate, my alpha, my Bucky,” the giantess growled out before leaning into take pink lips, Y/N never having known a love this intense could be hers as tongues caressed, the alpha’s knot keeping them locked, even as hot seed ran out of overfilled cunt.
“Mmmm, my Y/N,” he growled down parched throat as ample hips bucked once more feeling juicy cunt clinch again, cerulean hips rutting harder.
Holy shit, they weren’t lying, Y/N was like an omega but with more stamina & power than an alpha. The soldier unable to stop flesh & metal hand from falling to ample hips to guide his alpha’ rocking, directing Y/N to rock harder bringing the giantess closer to another orgasm.
“Need to cum alpha,” she panted out on his lips, Y/N leaning in close, whimpering lips as azure hands cupped stubbled cheeks holding the solider close.
“Cum doll, cum around my knot, I need to feel you,” he panted, swearing he was preparing to cum once more, clenching cunt fluttering to milk spilling cock once more, letting out a grunt, surprised it was possible for that to happen so soon.
This time Y/N whimpered, azure body falling limp into the soldier who held tight, barely enough strength to hold her tightly. Metal fingers soothing over trembling spine as the water continued to rain over them, more combined arousal & slick flowing from the shivering creature that held tightly, kissing over the bond mark she had given him.
“I got you doll,” Bucky panted, kissing her bond mark, noting it was healing, beginning to scar as he held her head to flesh shoulder, slumped back into the tile wall as both panted out to the room.
“My mate,” Y/N mumbled into the male alpha’s overheating neck, nuzzling at his glands taking in his rut.
“Let’s get to bed, my little alpha,” Bucky breathed out.
The soldier forcing trembling body to its feet to stagger around & out of the bathroom to collapse on the bed, scooting so they laid on their sides, azure leg draped over strong hip to make sure to cover them. Calloused flesh hand brushing wet raven locks out of powder blue face as she done the same to push auburn strands away as well.
“I’ll treat you right doll,” he breathed, watching smile grace tired features, calloused fingers tracing the lines over her jaw over soft clavicle, between ample breast & to plump stomach.
“You’ll look beautiful with my cubs,” Bucky smiled at her, blue lined hand falling to the sun kissed one resting on plump stomach.
“Good, because I want all the cubs you will gift me with,” Y/N smiled, leaning in for a kiss & wasn’t disappointed at how passionate it became.
“But I do look forward to the practice to get there,” the giantess smirked darkly on flushed lips as the soldier shivered at the admittance, causing a shiver of her own to work its way down cerulean spine to pool in her lower abdomen, feeling another release building.
“I forgot to mention, Jotun breed relentlessly when they initially couple during the first 24 hours or so,” Y/N smiled to Bucky who smirked at her having a feeling it would be a blinding 24 hours.
“Then bring it on my little alpha,” he smiled devilishly, even though his knot was deflating he could still feel a hard-on.
“Good thing I'm not just a mortal,” Bucky growled on cobalt lips as they embraced, pulling tight to nuzzle & cuddle before the next wave hit them both.
