Give it up for the character insults! Pick whoever, but I want many! XD
OH BOY
thank you so much for this i’m going to enjoy it. i got a little carried away.
i apologize in advance if these are uh not good i think i’m a lot funnier than i actually am. i have also given up on. actual sentences and grammar.
also apologize for the fact that some of these aren’t really insults. but they are fun! :D
Aellai Darrell - idiot. i mean. idiot. please stop throwing yourself face first into everything that wants to kill you. i mean really. just. absolute dumbass.
Raewyn Corellius - has no friends, just daedra. no wonder her moms sent her far, far away.
Evelyne Antonius - honestly these jokes just write themselves. literally a drunk necromancer. i don’t even need to say anything.
Ziapiel - tiny. so tiny. could squash her like a bug. that’s a really terrifying image. needs horns to be taller than anyone else. still shorter. shrimp.
Larandel - a THOT. also a Dres so there’s that. which is an insult in and of itself. please don’t tell her i told you. i will die.
Tamera Light-Bringer - a literal fanatic. hears strange voices and unquestioningly follows them. unironically likes meridia. has never heard of a brush.
Lyra Darrell - feral goblin. cares more about keeping her hair nice than the fate of the world, probably.
Mizuki - even more of a feral goblin. literally the unluckiest person alive. afraid of water. who the fuck is afraid of water.
Damiana - i don’t even know if it’s possible to insult her. smears blood on her face like an absolute sociopath. absolute biohazard. unstable.
Alvena - stuck-up. which is ironic for an altmer who worships a mortal god. terrible taste in other people.
Astraia - hopeless. probably couldn’t find her way out of a box. desperately needs help.
Altaire - also a thot. doesn’t know what shame is. would do anything (one?) for like... half a septim. reckless. please get standards.
Adelaide Darrell - needs to learn how to say no to people. would get pushed around by a limp noodle.
Zenaide - absolute dumbass. literal poster child for dumb jock. why the fuck would you consume hist sap. why would you think that was a good idea.
Emylynn - beats people to death with a stick. please see a therapist. pretty please.
Aralyn - the most feral goblin of all. seems to think biting is socially acceptable. afraid of 99.9999% of people. the coward.
Jaede - ?????????????? speaks for itself tbh. needs to stop playing golf with skulls.
Ashe - when you try your best but you don’t succeed. would probably blow herself up accidentally.
Zanthe - absolute ditz. couldn’t fight her way out of a paper bag. really, really bad taste in romantic partners.
Asenath - small and angry. teeny tiny. possibly having serious hallucinations. absolutely no clue what she’s doing. has never flexed her ‘decent person’ muscle.
thank you so much for this it was a ton of fun!!! hope you enjoyed reading at least a little bit, even if i’m not as funny as i’d like to be :’)
The rest of the Skyrim kiddos! Figured it’s about time to introduce them. Small blurbs under the cut, hope you enjoy and thank you in advance for reading! :D
So, uh, first things first, this is... kinda long. There’s a lot (a Lot!) of characters because I don’t know what self-restraint is apparently. They all have varying degrees of importance in the overall canon. Thank you again for reading and I hope you enjoy!
Lyra Darrell - Breton. Dragonborn/Companion. Sword/shield/fire magic. Bit of a blood knight who really enjoys fighting. Honorable. Hates the Thalmor with a burning passion. Helps people when she can.
Damiana - Imperial. Assassin. Listener. Enjoys murder a little bit too much, even for Brotherhood standards. Enjoys making people uncomfortable.
Mizuki - Wood Elf. Thief. Nightingale. Shy, quiet, nervous. Has a massive unrequited crush on Brynjolf. Eventually murdered as part of a Brotherhood contract.
Hikari Earth-Mender - Nord. Stormcloak. Large sword. Joins after her father is killed by the Thalmor for Talos worship. Impulsive and needs looking after.
Aspen - Nord. Stormcloak. Tries to keep Hikari from killing herself accidentally. This is easier said than done. Calm and friendly.
Alvena - Altmer. Mage. College. Quiet and serious with a Dark and Mysterious PastTM. (Jk it isn’t that mysterious but it is pretty dark.) Has injuries that sometimes interfere with casting spells.
Eledor - Altmer. Mage. Thalmor. The missing piece of Alvena’s past. Trying to earn forgiveness he’s never going to get. A mess.
Kallista Morvayne - Dunmer. Dual wield. Intrepid adventurer and occasional apprentice to wizards of varying repute. Friendly and very cheerful. A bit klutzy.
Axelle Telvanni - Dunmer. Wizard. Stays cooped up in a giant mushroom tower and causes problems for the other wizard who lives there. Haughty but overall an okay person.
Hay-Lee - Argonian. Mage. College. Doesn’t really know what she’s doing but likes magic and likes learning. Trying her best. Too pure for this world.
Raelyn - Redguard. Vampire. Volkihar. Corruption is the name of the game. Pretty neutral overall. Takes care of herself, not really into the whole “vampire supremacy” thing nor does she feel any obligation to other vamps.
Astraia - Nord. Dawnguard. Big hammer. Interested in protecting the innocent and helping people. Sweet and quiet.
Altaire - Imperial. Blind. Thieves Guild, vaguely. Helps out around the Ragged Flagon. Bawdy and flirtatious. Will take advantage of your assumptions.
Zanthe - Dunmer. Thief. Merchant friend of the guild. Friendly and has a lot of stories. A former Grey Fox.
Aralyn - Altmer. Assassin. Quiet and reserved. Stays away from most of the Brotherhood members. A former Listener.
Adara-la - Khajiit. Thief. Can and will bite you. Probably doesn’t mean it meanly. Has occasionally tried to eat Bosmer.
Atan - Orc. Imperial soldier. Staunch Empire supporter. Despises the Thalmor, but thinks the Empire is the best bet. Calm and diligent soldier. Extremely professional.
Oh my god this cast of characters is massive. (When did it get this big wtf.) Feel free to ask about any/all(!) of them! I am as always happy to talk about them. (I don’t know how I got so out of control I swear.) Hope you enjoyed and thank you for reading!
-for… for all of them??? y’know what i’m just gonna write down fun facts about whatever characters come to mind, i hope that’s okay!
also many many apologies for taking so long! speaking of long, this is, so i’m sticking it under the cut
Aellai:
-She actually has really long hair for most of her story, and it only gets short when Naryu lops most of it off to prevent Veya from holding her in place while trying to take off her head
-If she’s in a very good mood and around Emeric you might catch her making sarcastic remarks instead of just being serious all the time (gasp!!!)
-She and Ashur get along surprisingly well and were mutually pleased to see one another in Hakoshae
-Occasionally she’ll say things completely seriously but that are jokes and you have to know her really well to understand the difference
-”The light inside is broken but I still work”
-Smiling is for losers
-Should be smarter than to make deals with hostile daedra but too desperate to give a shit
Raewyn:
-Has really long hair… like really long… that braid she wraps around her head is like… down to her butt (same lmao)
-10/10 would use an army of daedra to clean her house
-Why do anything magic can do for you (that’s largely an exaggeration but she is very good at using magic to do things she doesn’t want to to)
-Usually very practical and dresses very plainly but likes having opportunities to dress up and do her hair and wear dresses and w/e
-DoneTM
Larandel:
-Dres (surprise!) and would gut the rest of her family with a fork if she ever got the chance
-Actual blood mage (I like the idea that nightblade powers are based on blood magic anyway)
-Will not deal with anyone wanting to/who does keep slaves and will in fact free those slaves and probably gut you
-For someone whose job very often involves reading people to get close to her target she is very bad at reading Naryu and doesn’t realize she’s flirting with her until she actually just says ‘fuck it’ and kisses her
Tamera:
-Disrespecting Meridia is literally the only thing that makes her angry at all, she will never get upset with you insulting anyone else including herself
-Should probably be more concerned with the occasionally militant voice in her head than she actually is
-Grows up with no talent for magic, but very strong and very good with a maul, develops a talent for healing after Meridia starts possessing her every once in a while
Lyra:
-Way too enthusiastic about fighting creatures that are way older and more powerful than she is but somehow always wins
-Were her teeth always that sharp? who knows
-For some reason, thinks “Maybe you should stop sheathing your greatsword up your ass” is a good pickup line… for some even stranger reason, it worked (???)
-Burns everything she tries to cook
-Sometime after absorbing the souls of like 50+ dragons her use of the voice got obscenely powerful and that was the only reason she was a match for alduin (that and sheer stubbornness)
-Has replaced her parents with Paarthurnax and spends a lot of time on the throat of the world
Mizuki:
-Most people are convinced that she’s actually mute, this includes about half of the guild
-Her two best friends are Brynjolf and Zanthe, and she spends a lot of time at the latter’s shop
-Altaire makes her super uncomfortable, but Altaire also doesn’t realize she’s there for like the first month that she’s in the guild
-She never buys food, she either swipes something (much more out of habit now than necessity) or when she’s on the road she hunts and eats whatever she kills raw
-Borderline feral but good at pretending not to be
Alvena:
-Prefers to just stare at people until they become uncomfortable instead of, idk, talking to them
-Still feels guilty about revering Talos because of growing up in the Dominion even though she knows she shouldn’t
-Knows the absolute most random bullshit about religions and is kind of a walking encyclopedia on the topic
-Beanpole
-Could electrocute you on the spot by just kind of thinking about it
Altaire:
-Copes with her really bad childhood by flirting with anything that has a pulse
-Her sister may or may not have tried to drown her several times as a child
-Sometimes people don’t realize that she’s blind, which she finds endlessly amusing
-Mercer has threatened to murder her repeatedly, which just means she goes even farther out of her way to annoy him. the rest of the guild tries to keep them apart forcibly
Zanthe:
-Her eventual shop /cough laundering scheme cough/ is called “The Fox’s Finds”, no she’s not subtle
-Her natural hair color is light brown, but it’s dyed red for most of the time she’s a Grey Fox
-Continually makes allusions to being a Grey Fox to Mercer but never tells him definitively because she loves fucking with him and knows he generally disapproves of her but she’s too valuable for him to get rid of
-Made her slingshot herself and does wood carvings as a hobby
Aralyn:
-Has an older sister who ran away from their pretty evil parents and she kind of resents for not taking her with her
-Almost too nervous to function
-Lucien found her sleeping next to her parents’ corpses covered in blood so that’s fun i guess
-I have a lot of characters who are really quiet and she’s one of them
-Feral and not good at hiding it
-Absolutely should not be released into civilized society
Jaede:
-???
-??????
-More seriously she puts in two new dukes of mania/dementia and then has the one from dementia replaced cause she doesn’t like him
-Way too fond of breaking skulls with a giant warhammer than she should be
-A walking collection of all of the different items collected during the shivering isles (most notably: charity of madness, regalia, nerveshatter, diadem of euphoria)
Asenath:
-Small and ANGRY
-Will fight you and will almost certainly win
-Has been having weird dreams about people she’s never met since she was young but always shrugged it off as, you know, normal dreams
-Hint: they were not normal dreams
-Initially opposed to having a ghost sharing her head but she came around and they’re best friends now
-Will just start making snarky comments to her ghost friend which is really awkward when other people can’t see him
i’m sorry again that this took so long and was so long but i hope you enjoyed and thank you for the ask! i had a lot of fun with this!!! :D
Bored. Recently reread my absolute favorite skyrim fic of all time (Dragonrend by Myrielle on FF.Net, it’s really really well-written and I’d highly recommend it!) and now wanna babble about my DB cause I’m not annoying enough yet. Full post under the cut, as always.
Avalyra Adelaide Darrell is the third daughter and fourth child of two Mages Guild mages in Evermore, High Rock, and the only one who doesn’t have a particular talent for magic (at least, nothing her family practices. She eventually discovers she’s pretty good at destruction). She’s also the most likely to hit you for using her full name instead of calling her Lyra. (Fun fact! Avalyra is pronounced Ah-vuh-lear-uh, but the nickname she uses is pronounced Lye-ruh. Additional fun fact! Almost no one in Skyrim knows that Lyra is a nickname!)
Her parents are fairly distant and too involved in the guild to pay much attention to their children, particularly when the fourth one comes around about twelve years after the first, so her older brother (who’s the oldest child in the family) takes care of her the most. His name is Lance, and he dotes on her, much to the frustration of her two sisters (Therese and Felicity, respectively by age) who feel like he never paid them the same attention. They aren’t particularly vindictive about it, they’re just about as distant as her parents (not helped by the fact that her parents do tend to like them better, as they’re the most talented mages in the family).
So instead of joining the rest of her family at the Mages Guild, she stops by the Fighters Guild for training when they’re out doing ~magic things~. There, she runs into a grizzled old spellsword and goes “holy shit i wanna learn how to do that”. She starts following him around, and though he never acknowledges her, he starts doing basic exercises when she’s around to help her learn. And thus, she begins learning the sword, shield, and desto magic. (It’s a family tradition, even if she doesn’t know it.)
Life continues on like this for a while - being around her brother at home and Benji the old spellsword when she’s at the Guild, and she’s content. Eventually, she gets old enough and good enough that she starts taking basic Guild contracts, and she’s content to just do that for the rest of her life - live with her brother and fight things and follow Benji around like a lost duckling. (She probably likes fighting a little bit more than she should, oops.)
Then, when she’s just turned sixteen, everything changes. Lance gets into an argument with some Thalmor soldiers over basically nothing and is killed. Lyra’s overwhelmed by rage and doesn’t know what to do with herself shy of picking a fight with every single Thalmor agent in High Rock (as it is, she gets into a fight with some bandits that’s a little over her head and almost loses an eye, and would have if she hadn’t taken a potion in time). Benji realizes, and casually suggests that she might try going to Hammerfell to escape the Thalmor in an attempt to save her from herself. She hears rumors of a rebellion against the Empire (which she has decided she hates for bowing down to the Thalmor and for refusing to do anything about her brother’s death) in Skyrim and decides to go there instead.
She goes, gets caught trying to cross the border, Helgen happens, and the rest is history. She ends up joining the Companions, where she meets her future husband, and eventually decides not to take a side in the Civil War after visiting Windhelm and seeing the conditions that the Dunmer and Argonians live in. (Eventually I think she’s going to kind of force the Stormcloaks and Empire into an alliance to fight the Dominion, but I haven’t quite decided how her story ends yet.) All I’ve got time to write about her for now, but I do have more for some time in the future. Appreciate thoughts as always!
Thank you so much! I have no idea why my typing is so big. Hope you enjoy! Gonna answer for Lyra cause I haven’t really talked about her, hope that’s all right!
🌿 What is something true about your OC that they refuse to admit about themselves? Is there any reason to this besides embarrassment?
She likes the Beast Blood more than she lets on. Vilkas seeks a cure pretty soon after they cure Kodlak and she gets cured with him, cause when it comes down to it she doesn’t want to live in Hircine’s Hunting Grounds forever. But there’s definitely a part of her that regrets giving her werewolf form up.
🥀 What is something your OC blames themselves for and is it really their fault? Does it keep them up at night and is there any lingering trauma?
There is absolutely no way that she could have prevented her brother’s death. But she wasn’t there when it happened, she wasn’t able to help him, and she never got to say goodbye, and she’s definitely never forgiven herself for any of those things. She also somewhat regrets not being able to visit her brother’s grave more often now that she’s left High Rock.
🍃 Describe a regular day for your OC. What is their schedule (if they have one).
So during the dragon crisis it’s pretty much wake up (9/10 times in the middle of nowhere), find a dragon, kill the dragon, raid whatever tomb has the artifact she needs to find for whatever group she’s helping right now, travel towards her next destination, and go to bed. Not necessarily in that order. Her life really doesn’t have a lot of structure during the crisis. After it’s over she gets better about having a routine.
Thank you so much for the ask! I hope you enjoyed, I really appreciate it! :D
❤️ for Lyra? How did she end up with her husband? (azuraspect)
❤️ How did they end up in a relationship with their current partner(s)?
Lyra and Vilkas, uh, didn’t really get along when they first met each other. He saw her as a part-mage upstart, and she made some really graphic comments about where she thought he stuck his sword when he wasn’t using it. Kodlak, wise man that he is, sent them on some contracts together in order to help them learn to get along, and eventually they started talking. They found out that they actually had a decent amount in common, and fought well together, and were pretty decently matched sparring partners (particularly after Lyra agreed, begrudgingly, to stop attempting to a. set him on fire, or b. cheat by slowing time). So they started spending more time together, and while they never really stopped mocking each other or anything, it got to be more teasing than mean. And then one day they were just walking around holding hands, which confused pretty much everyone else, but they were happy for them. :)
Hope you enjoyed, and as always, thank you very much for the ask! :D
