#m. lan xichen

[baijingshen]

@graceflute​ 👀

          Zewu Jun expects to find someone fast asleep when he comes back to the library, but he was sure it would be THE BOY - and not Wangji. The look of surprise on his face quickly turns into a smile as he regards his brother’s sleeping form, resting against one of the book shelves, in his lap little A-Yuan looking wide awake and playing with a wooden toy. If he’s discontent with having lost Lan Wangji’s attention, he doesn’t show it. Xichen feels a wave of affection for both of them. It’s been less than two weeks that Wangji returned from his travels with the boy in his arms, but the change it has evoked in him is UNDENIABLE. He was always one to shine in the face of a challenge, but this is a whole new experience for him to take on. He must be incredibly tired if he falls asleep in the middle of the day like this.

Xichen doesn’t have the heart to wake him. Instead he slowly steps closer to them and leans down to Yuan.      “Did Wangji fall asleep?” he asks, smiling a little wider. “We should let him rest for a bit, what do you think, A-Yuan?” He offers his hand to the boy, palm up. Wangji won’t be too happy if he wakes up before they come back, but Xichen knows his brother well enough to know that if he wakes him now he will claim that he doesn’t need rest as much as he CLEARLY does.

[baijingshen]

@memorystxrs​ sent: “ Can’t you see why I want nothing to do with that life? ” (mianmian @ lan xichen)

          “I can,” Lan Xichen admits, lowering his gaze with a faint smile tugging on his lips despite his heavy heart. It’s not often that he meets someone as brave and outspoken as Mianman, most people never daring to speak up in fear of stepping on the wrong toes. It’s good to mind one’s MANNERS, of course, but sometimes it’s also necessary to stand by one’s opinions and decisions. The cultivation world is one Xichen wouldn’t want to miss, as it’s all he’s ever known, but he can very much relate to Mianman growing tiring of the endless POLITICS. There is too much focus on shifts in power, too much mistrust among supposed allies, and too little tolerance for the differences that make all of them human.

     “I suppose I’m just sad to see you go,” he continues, finding her eyes once more. “You are a VOICE OF REASON among the hot-tempered.” Lan Xichen has no doubt that Mianman-- no, Luo Qingyang, is more than capable of taking care of herself in the world out there, but he wonders what their own little world will become if people like her choose to abandon it instead of fighting to keep it GOOD.

[baijingshen]

@pyreruin​ sent: “ of course it meant something! ” @ surprise me 👀

          Lan Qing’s reaction is so genuine that Lan Xichen can’t stop himself from smiling, ruining his perfectly controlled neutral expression. He was TEASING her, wistfully speaking of the small token of affection he procured for her birthday a week ago and saying how, no matter how much care he put into choosing it, it couldn’t possibly mean anything to her in comparison to any gift her dear Lan Chenjing got for her. It was purely for fun as he doesn’t feel like that in the slightest. Competing for anyone’s love has never been something Lan Xichen felt compelled to do and getting between siblings seems especially unnecessary. Not to mention that the force that would be able to get between Lan Qing and her brother has not been born yet and might never be. Their bond is stronger than most, perhaps stronger even than the one between Xichen and Wangji, as Lan Xichen acknowledges without envy.

     “I’m teasing you, A-Qing,” Xichen admits, his smile still warm and present when he looks at her. His hand comes up to gently rest on her arm, a gesture he allows himself given their private setting.      “But I’m glad to hear you can draw some JOY from my gift. It wasn’t easy thinking of something for someone as modest as you.” Both of the siblings are the epitome of modesty. Not unlike Wangji, Lan Qing seems content with a place to do her studies and an access to the Lan Clan’s library, while Lan Ning never really asks for ANYTHING at all. Despite not being from the Gusu Lan Clan originally they fit in here perfectly, leading quiet and peaceful lives. No matter what grief and darkness lies in their past, they succeeded in escaping it and Lan Xichen is determined to make sure it will never catch up with them again.

[baijingshen]

@graceflute​ sent: “ Living a lie… it festers inside you, like poison. You have to fight for what’s in your heart. ” (wwx @ lxc)

          It’s not an unwise thing to say and Lan Xichen finds it to be something of a RELIEF to hear that Wei Wuxian holds such noble sentiment in his heart. Even if his attitudes and behavior may seem a little controversial to some, at least no one can say he is dishonest or false. It’s hard to see through him at this point but when Xichen listens to his heart it tells him that whatever Wei Wuxian’s smiles and jokes are meant to obscure, it isn’t a DARKNESS that needs to be feared. Neither cruelty nor malevolence speak from his manners but rather their polar opposites.

     “I don’t disagree, Wei gongzi,” he says, but the expression on his face doesn’t quite manage to transform into a smile yet. Wei Wuxian speaks so boldly, radiating an INNER STRENGTH that Xichen noticed the first time he saw him. Perhaps that is what captured Lan Wangji’s heart unlike anything before. It takes courage to think like this and even more to live by it as a principle. Courage, because the world often isn’t in accord with one’s heart’s true nature, and courage because to open one’s heart means to be vulnerable for everyone to see.

     “It’s not an easy fight; many never even dare to try.” Finally Lan Xichen’s mouth twitches with the beginning of a smile. “I do believe the PRICE for staying true to yourself is worth it. After all, if we are not, aren’t we living someone else’s life? Wei gongzi--- I admire your courage and your wisdom. I hope this world won’t discourage you from being yourself, even if it might not be ready for whoever that is.”