what are some things that gay enemies dee and mac love to do with each other?
going shopping together for HORRIBLE outfits and egging each other into uglier and uglier purchases. dennis tries to revoke his credit card until they stop escalating each other on hawaiian print, but dee can always find it
get dressed to go to the club together, also while escalating each other into hideous slutty outfits, then half-ass wingmanning each other all night as they get drunk and both try to grind on go-go dancers
smoke weed and talk shit about every single person they know - sometimes they’ll even let the other get a word in about somebody that only one of them have met
take classes together on kickboxing, jiu jitsu, etc and bragging about who gets further. then trying their moves out on each other (in dee’s living room, in the middle of the bar, out in the alley, in their local dunkin donuts)
get drunk and pick apart dennis’s every flaw regardless of if he’s in the room or not (usually interspersed with mac complaining about smthng he clearly loves about him, or dee starting to tear up about her parents if theyre REALLY drunk)
mac is jealous that charlie and dennis watch romcoms without him even though he’s not at all interested in them, so him and dee drink beer and watch old terrible comedy shows just to rip them apart
cheat at flip cup and beer pong, either against or with each other
both of them are pretty sure they’re being saintly when tearing each other down (”mac, i say this with complete honesty and concern for your wellbeing- tom brady would kick your ass”)
they get lost in TERRIBLE youtube video/cartoon spirals when they’re high on gasoline or some shit
then argue about which one is tom and which is jerry, etc
mac is pretty sure he’s an expert in the kitchen so he regularly tries to make things when theyre fucked up and dee watches intently, yelling as he makes a mess of her kitchen but really trying to learn his recipes
drunkenly screaming at each other on the street about which one of them got too drunk and got them kicked out of the bars (the answer is usually: both. mac for something like trying to dance on the daises reserved for strippers, and dee for, like, getting mad and trying to pee on the floor of the VIP section. both things have happened to people i know irl)
genuinely thinking calling each other “bitch” and “asshole” are terms of endearment
