What I think people misunderstand about privilege is that you do not have to exert the privilege yourself to benefit from it. How other people automatically treat you can be a form of privilege over others if they treat a different group of people worse by default.
Yes trans men and trans women have different gender relationships to each other. But when we pass, that cis person who doesn't know we're trans treats trans men like men, and trans women like women. Therefore, when we pass, transmascs have privilege over transfems.
And when we don't pass, they treat trans men like women, and trans women like pedophiles, sexual predators, and creeps. While there have been instances of trans men being treated that way, it's systemically focused on trans women. It's how conservatives get bathroom bills and sports bills and rulings passed.
Every person you know has probably heard this shit against trans women, which means it's a stronger mental pipeline for people, both cis and trans, to believe trans women are sexual predators. It's used by both cis and trans people all the time, because as far as you think you are special, everyone has internalized bigotry.
But even ignoring that, you do not personally have to be bigoted towards trans women to benefit from institutionalized transmisogyny. It honestly has very little to do with how trans men treat trans women, and much more to do with how society treats us differently.
