#maknaesaja

[badheart]

The Baby Saja Experience, ft. @maknaesaja + Bonus:

special honor in the posters for us. 🫰

[heartpatterned]

@maknaesaja | continued from xx

it's taking practice, but he is gentler than before. a couple times baby had needed to push him away, remind him to back off, but the more time they spend together the easier it is to remember to offer invitation rather than make his own. and romance is genuinely trying, always hyperaware of how much or little he actually touches the other demon when allowed to. always so delicately sticking to the boundaries he's been given, not wanting to shatter what they have. what they are building, one touch at a time.

the first time baby reaches out for him without hesitation is electrifying. they barely brushed fingers, but it carried romance for days. he practically glows any time the other holds his hand after that too, even if it only lasts a few seconds, not even considering pressing for more until habit has them doing so whenever in reach of each other.

he doesn't know why he does today. but somewhere in the handholding, romance needs that little bit more, and chances it, soothing touch over the other's knuckles. it's impossible to not hesitate when baby's hold tightens, though he doesn't stop when no request to comes, and he continues the simple motion. it's...soothing. being allowed to, having earned at least some wiggle room to test tiny lines after dropping the tendency to push at bigger boundaries. sometimes he still gets a ripple of nerves from the other, even on simple things like this, but existing as they do speaks volumes for the progress the two of them have made.

and he's surprised when suddenly baby is in his lap. for the briefest instant romance had assumed he'd been about to get up, that their hint of contact was enough for the day, only to freeze when that isn't what happens. no, baby simply moves, assuming —correctly— that romance would automatically make room for him, and he's unbearably slow in catching up. his unoccupied hand flutters touch to his shoulder, tracing down to make sure baby is comfortable before pulling away again, pressing his palm flat against his own knee to not give in to the temptation now quite literally sat in his lap. his breath is a little shallower, just for a few seconds, acutely aware of how close they are and not having realized how starving for it he'd been.

and baby seems not to notice the disruption he's made, unaware of the wake he's left romance to spin in, earning a confused blink at the question. there are multiple ways to answer it, but only one he can think of that won't ruin this. too much? no, never enough. maybe romance hadn't been as clear as he thought, when he had said how much he enjoyed, craved, so much.

"never."

and that's it. that's the truth, as simple as it sounds. romance is watching him with devoted attention, mentally shaking off the stun to continue the soothing touch that had invited this to happen. he wonders why it's a question that needs asking while wanting desperately to dive deeper himself, forcing himself to drop his gaze to their hands so he won't try anyway. "...i know i can be a lot, even when i don't mean to be," he elaborates in a much softer voice, picking words carefully as he tries to sort his thoughts. a task made all the more difficult by not really knowing what they all are yet. "but figuring out what you want or like isn't too much. it's important for both of us to know where your boundaries are."

[parasociallly]

🦇 🕯️ ⚓

✎ㅤ. . .ㅤ𝑯𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑪𝑨𝑵𝑶𝑵 𝑸𝑼𝑬𝑺𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑺.

[ 🦇 ]ㅤ.ㅤwhat is a fear they never talk about ?

even someone like romance is not without fear and for him, the greatest fear of all is the fear of losing control. romance is, above all else, an absolute control freak. it's not just that he needs to know exactly what's happening, who's with him, the potential outcomes etc. it's that he needs to know that if something goes wrong, that he is in control of it. he does not confront someone without full reassurance that he will come out on top, he does not put himself in a situation ( willingly ) in which he doesn't emerge victorious.

for romance, in this case at least, it's less about the power that comes with being in control and more about knowing that, regardless of the outcome, he perseveres ━ he survives.

you will not catch him speaking out this obviously ━ for any weakness is something that can be used against him and he would never willingly give someone anything that could be used to ruin him. if he feels as though he's no longer in control of the situation, this is when he relies on instinct, survival mode kicks in and he becomes less rational when it's a matter of life and death. for small things, he's able to save face and appear unbothered ; but if it were a serious situation where his life was at risk ━ that fear consumes him and he will do whatever it takes to survive.

even with those he considers special, close to him ( say, @takeabbyte for example ) he does not willingly relinquish control. but. . . if it's taken from him, he's less likely to react negatively. in terms of abby, he would be more open to the idea of not having control, though he's still not pleased about it.

[ 🕯️ ]ㅤ.ㅤwhat memory do they replay when they’re alone ?

and you know what ━ ? i really wish i could answer this one but the truth of the matter is, romance doesn't have any memories from his time prior to becoming a demon. there are no memories for him to replay because there's nothing there ━ lost to time or rather, no longer his own.

[ ⚓ ]ㅤ.ㅤwhat does “home” mean to them ?

that is. . . a tricky question to answer because romance isn't really sentimental, at least not in the typical sense. he doesn't remember what the feeling of home was like in the first place so carrying that into his life as a demon, there's no beautiful answer about how home is more than four walls and a place to rest one's head.

because really, that's what home is to romance. it's nothing special, it's a base of operations, somewhere to rest, somewhere that is solely his own - but nothing special, really.

[badheart]

cont. @maknaesaja

"Honestly I hadn't been sure if it was real," he had to admit, as he had not watched this particular show, but the internet certainly was full of various edits of this particular moment, though HUNTR/X entrance had been the most amusing part. "If only it was so easy," he murmured, thinking of all the speeches he had written and how often arguments broke out between the different parties. "You sure are more committed to the role than I would have ever expected... hope the payment will be worth it." Whatever reward was promised, or was it seriously friendship or the like; their ties to each other were unknown to him. Hyung-min really was giving his 100% if not more. Despite the ups and downs, Ji-an was finally able to do something that he actually wanted to do all his life, but if the same applied to the other? "Or would you rather quit, if you could?"

Ji-an's amusement grew upon watching the many subtle changes in the other's expression, though when he mentioned the Pride, he almost choked. "For once I feel too old for this." These fan groups, it was almost cult like and simply odd for him so many people could find together simply through music taste alone and not political views as that had been more the case in the past. "But it will be an honor of course," he voiced a bit theatrically, smirking a little bit. In the end he mostly wanted to win the youth over and luckily was the elder generation not that well versed with social media. For them he had to shine on posters and newspapers. Either way, he could not built his own fame too much on theirs, as it could lead to bad publicity if a group like them showed too much support for a politician but some photos on his own account sure could do wonders, so only starting with one member so far felt like a good compromise.

[notjustbaby]

@maknaesaja con't from here

"As far as I'm concerned, I'm completely normal, appearance-wise. I've been like this for centuries - since I came into existence. Just because you're not used to it doesn't make it freaky. We are not the same person, though. We're just alternate versions of each other. And there are more, too. We are similar, nothing more." his tail's flicking in the same way an annoyed cat's does. "Trust me: the only thing we have in common is Jinu and his whole boyband thing. You don't wanna know how different we really are."

[teeth-and-temptations]

you could have died , what were you thinking? ( for mystery! )

The demon hissed softly, feeling blood starting to soak through the sleeve of his shirt thanks to the deep gash on his bicep. "You really think I'd let that happen? Please... I've survived worse." Then he chuckled - only to wince again. This time the pain came from his ribs.

"I may get injured, but I'll never let someone kill me. Hunter or demon." Not unless that's what it took to protect his new pack.

[sinpatterned]

❝ if you want it, come get it. ❞

@maknaesaja / @maknaespice | xxx

and just like that, teasing and banter turns. romance doesn't try to hide the want that dances under his skin at the challenge (always trying to be so HONEST with the other, always communicating) even as he evaluates how serious the words are. how close to an offer it really is, and there's a small part of him irked at still not being able to read baby's intentions with complete certainty. getting pushed and pulled at the other's whim and need, and he wonders how often things change as a surprise to both of them rather than just himself.

"you almost sound like you mean it."

a hungry observation (starving, always starving, for more from him) colored with warmth of more than just honeyed intention. for all the variety in their interactions, this is a side of romance that is rarely displayed to him in more than an occasional sliver, always trying so hard to not repeat the mistake of being too much and overreaching what he's allowed. and despite an attempt at careful, the older demon can't fully avoid a somewhat predatory sway in closing the distance between them. he doesn't ask this time either before setting a hand at the other's waist, fingers hooking in a belt loop as if to keep baby there even though they both know he'll let go if needed.

"if you're not careful, i'll take you at your word," he hums in warning, looking pleased at the thought. for that matter, he is. the idea that baby would let him take what he wants is thrilling. intoxicating. certainly not an access he'd ever have anticipated before they knew each other and got onto the same page, but so temptingly close now, other hand delicately settling at the small of the other's back and leaning in closer as if readying for a kiss. everything to drink in the moment while it exists while technically light enough that baby can stop him if he really wants to, no matter how much romance aches at the consideration of being stopped. "i'd be careful about changing the game before you're ready to."

[xgeumbit]

@maknaesaja // cont.

the bits of green that peek out beneath the hazel of her eyes glinted sharply at the demon before her— the blades at the end of her war fan pointed towards the middle of its chest. hwa-young despised how human it looked in this form, replying to its smile with the start of a snarl.

if this had been any other demon— with no fans or public presence— taking it out would be simple. any speculation or rumors could be easily dealt with and she wouldn't have cared too much about receiving punishment from the elders for the trouble.

it would still be one less smear on the world.

but— with much reluctance— it indeed had a point. while she and many other hunters were still wary of playing nice with their underworld counterparts with this new honmoon, rumi was someone she wanted to try whatever new dynamic they were trying to establish with the more independent demons.

"—i imagine you want the same thing." to tear her into pieces, to rid of her and carry on its merry way without a second thought.