i have this urge to write down every memory of us that i can think of. simply to remember them. but will it hurt my manifestations?
lately i’ve been getting flashes of them. today, i happened to glance at the scar on my thigh i got with you on a bike ride. (you told me to be careful, i very much wasn’t)
i can remember, later, when it had healed and we were on a date waiting for our ride. you were looking down at it. you had felt so bad that day that i got that scar.
(i never really understood why. i still don’t. it wasn’t your fault. i fell. i laughed and got up and shared my excitement of the blood and how silly i had been)
But i told you the truth. That it was my new favorite scar. it was a memory i made with you. it was a record of it. physical proof. how could it not be my favorite?
you had your hand on my thigh. i can remember the look on your face. and thinking about how beautiful you are. so effortlessly gorgeous.
what bothers me is that i can’t remember your voice. in sweet memories like those, i can’t seem to recall your voice anymore. which is one of my favorite things about you. i can remember glimpses of some of the things that you said, but not everything. i hate that with a passion.
i have the urge to write down all these memories like this^ but as far as manifestation goes, i don’t know if this is a good idea. my block is that i keep looking to the past for comfort for the now. even though i want what i am manifesting now.













