#martyr-19

[martyr-19]

They never tell you how Hunters have no concept of personal space when you share a bed.

You know who you are.

[martyr-19]

{"guardian_login": "Martyr-19" [”ghost”: “Prophet”]}

{“id": "0123"}

{"title": "Click-Update"}

{"type": "entrylog" [“attached-images”: “02”]}

{"created": "####-##-##”}

{“updated”: “####-##-##”}

This is Prophet. Seeing as my Guardian has little to no recollection of this time, allow me to share on their behalf.

Our first official fireteam was a group of six, formed one year after being established within the Tower. Yes, it is a big group, and yes, it has everything to do with inexperience. Each of them were risen around the same time, that time being roughly a day or so after the Traveler was reawakened during the Red War. This was a very dangerous and challenging time for Veterans, let alone New Lights.

This fireteam consisted of:

- One Hunter

- Two Warlocks

- And three Titans

Our continued experience and cooperation together lasted 2 years, 3 months, and 17 days. Separation, according to data of my own and official records, was due to conflicting ideals that sparked frequent disagreements and compromised missions. This is assumed to be a result of losing fireteam members Keiran and Lillian. A direct order from Commander Zavala, the Titan Vanguard, saw to the remaining fireteam's disbandment and redistribution.

I have pulled the briefings of their public files>

————

BEV

{“guardian": "Bev"}

{“ghost": "Dogma"}

{“status”}} > active

{“stationed”}} > “Neomuna, Neptune”

> [hunter, human]

————

VUASS-#

{“guardian": "Vuass-4"}

{“ghost": "Aimee"}

{“status”}} > active

{“stationed”}} > “Eliksni Quarter, Botza District, Earth”

> [titan, exo]

————

KEIREN

{“guardian": "Keiren"}

{“ghost": "Chance"}

{“status”}} > deceased

{“stationed”}} > {“body-recovery”}} > [impossible] > {“ghost-recovery”}} > [impossible]

> [titan, human]

————

SENTRY-#

{“guardian": "Sentry-3"}

{“ghost": "Flint"}

{“status”}} > active

{“stationed”}} > “European Dead Zone, Earth”

> [titan, exo]

————

LILLIAN

{“guardian": "Lillian"}

{“ghost": "Casper"}

{“status”}} > deceased

{“stationed”}} > {“body-recovery”}} > [recovered] > {“ghost-recovery”}} > [located]

> [warlock, awoken]

————

I am currently in the process of further pulling files.

Prophet

[martyr-19]

{"guardian_login": "Martyr-19"}

{“id": "2694"}

{"title": "Too Long"}

{"type": "entrylog"}

{"created": "####-##-##”}

{“updated”: “####-##-##”}

So it’s been quite a while since I’ve dusted things off and logged into this. Don’t worry. I’ve been keeping notes.

Where to start? I don’t think there really is a good place to start.

Maybe I’ll break everything down in my future logs. Eventually. Still busy as ever right now. Still wrapping my head around things.

Hell, I’m sure everyone knows the gist of the biggest ones— you Guardians should.

Lets start with the easiest part.

New Hunter Vanguard!

Proud of Crow. Proud that he’s doing it because he wants to. Not a bet, not a dare. Not something he’s not ready for.

I really am proud of him. Doesn’t mean I’m letting the kid boss me around now, but— y’know. Show him some respect, will you?

I myself took a few big steps back, though. Stopped being involved on the field so directly, more research and New Light training. Paperwork and teaching. Was trying that, anyways. With the Echoes acting up? Not much time for it…

First Maya Sundaresh and the Echo of Command.

As I write this, sitting across the table from Crow, the second Echo and its holder have decided to make themselves known. Fikrul reached it. Yeah, that Fikrul. Not sure how many Guardians know about what’s happening directly, but it’s probably worse than you heard. I won’t sugarcoat it.

Live eliksni being taken and turned into Scorn.

An infection. A plague.

I witnessed it happen firsthand— ugly, horrible, instantaneous.

Many of you have probably already been out fighting and performing rescues for scattered eliksni. Keep it up. We don’t give an inch. We protect them just as fiercely as any human, exo, or awoken. Not just because this could impact Sol, but because they’re our people too.

I’ve recently reestablished connections with an old fireteam member by the name of Vuass-4. From my very first fireteam, actually. He works closer with the eliksni than any Guardian I know— it’s best to consult him on matters regarding activity in the Quarter.

We’re working on getting a connection set up. Updates to come, but be sure to listen out for direct Vanguard orders and news. Stay sharp, Guardians.

[martyr-19]

Why do some exos get face mechanics but others dont? Cayde had fully articulated brows for the Traveler's sake.

Helluva good question. One I think about a lot, actually.

Honestly, my bet is practicality.

There were too many of us being built for extra intricacies to be the standard.

Not to ramble, but every exo body is the same. The exact same, straight from the factory. Our faces are really all we have in terms of individuality since our bodies are cut and paste, but still there's only so many combinations of heads and plating material until you look exactly like someone else.

Uniqueness has never been the standard or priority.

With mass production like that, I can imagine the last thing on the hierarchy of importance was letting us all smile or furrow our brows. Human expression is complex, and transferring that to something so inorganic requires more parts, more thought, more time. To get a higher yield of production, organic features would need to be simplified, and sacrifices would have to be made to keep the process from becoming too tedious.

It wouldn't just come down to giving the proper plates. Every facial variation would need a fitted design of the expressive components. Every facial variation would also need to be reworked to integrate the proper connections and mechanics underneath.

It could be that some of us were drafts — fitted with those mechanics to see if it was worth the time and effort to produce en masse. Clearly, in terms of practicality, it wasn't.

Cayde could've been one of those few where features were crafted with more humanity in mind than the rest of us. A special few, in my opinion.

Don't tell him I said that, the last thing we need is his head getting too big for him to fit through doors.

It’s a shame, though. The longer I'm around, the more I wish my face could give away what I was feeling. I think knowing nothing but conflict from day one makes you crave the little, simple, things that have nothing to do with it.

[martyr-19]

{"guardian_login": "Martyr-19"}

{“id": "0122"}

{"title": "Click"}

{"type": "entrylog"}

{"created": "####-##-##”}

{“updated”: “####-##-##”}

Back when I was a New Light, I did a lot of tailing people around to try learning my place. Big people, y'know? Veteran Guardians and Vanguard. They were in charge, or had been around so long, and therefore always seemed to know what to do. I didn't. It only made sense to learn by watching and listening, taking up every mission I could and offering to lend a hand.

I was keenly aware of the condition of myself. My condition being that my mind was under constant strain, and that memories served to tangle and weigh on it further. I only had so much space that I could fill, and that space was constantly altered and maintained by my Ghost. The big things, the important things, were what we determined took priority.

I guess I myself determined that connections with anyone were out of the question. With people, there's always so much to keep in mind—little details to remember, things you'll want to desperately hold onto. I was scared of knowing anyone, and I was scared of them knowing me, since I would likely never hold onto our interactions. I know it wasn't healthy. I know now that it's probably done a lot of damage that even the Light can't reach and I can't shake. Habits form and die hard, but all I can do is try to unlearn them.

As a result, I didn't talk much. I didn't serve as anything but droning support. You can't connect with people when you don't try to stop from fading into the noise. I thought it was easier to be so disconnected from everything. Most Guardians forgot I existed for my first year or so at the Tower, and I don't remember much of anyone at all. I did a lot of work to push through the ache of loneliness that isolation caused. That, of course, included direct Vanguard work once I was out of that "You've been dead for a helluva long time—hope you're ready for war" haze and could follow instructions.

Ikora, Zavala...Cayde.

Now, Cayde, I used to follow him around like a stray puppy way back when. I didn't talk much—as I said, watching and listening. I don't know what it was about him. Maybe because he was the opposite of what I was: confident, skilled, optimistic, sociable. Maybe it was because he saw me first. I was fresh out of the grave and lost, with no voice, no identity—like a proper machine of war.

I remember a vague sense of envy.

I wanted that. I wanted to be that.

In hindsight, I think you can't just be that—Cayde was...well, that was him. Something uniquely him. Be as capable and funny as you want, there isn't a way to be Cayde-6.

Though it helped something click, I think, when we talked for the first time. Not an actual conversation, mind you. More like our first exchange of words.

I was partnered up with a fireteam of Guardians roughly my "age." Didn't know them, I don't think, but they talked like they knew each other. The run itself was the sort of run you give to newbies to prepare them without throwing them to the wolves. Supplies? I can't remember the shipment, but I do remember a real angry Captain kicking my head so hard into a rock that Prophet had to bring me back. So much for not throwing us to the wolves, but not the point.

It was the first time I was acknowledged directly because I was fading into things, not noticed. Acknowledged.

We were heading out after the debrief, and Cayde stopped me. The first thing he said to me was: "You've been floating around the Tower a while, that right? I've spotted you a few times."

I told him I had, and that I preferred to keep my hands busy and head low.

He just nodded, patted me on the shoulder as he was walking off to get back to it, and called back a "Then keep the kids in check for me, yeah?"

Looking back, it wasn't much—closer to nothing than something. At the time? It was everything. Being seen when I wasn't trying to be, having my existence pointed out—it was like confirmation that I was real. I was alive. I was a person.

I didn't consider myself much of a person before that. I wasn't sure what I was.

But I liked that feeling. Being seen was a good feeling. It scared me to know people were perceiving me even when I tried to avoid it, but it was still a good feeling no matter how much I wanted to convince myself it wasn't.

It clicked that I didn't want to be alone. I wanted to know. I wanted to be known.

I don't know if he knew or knows how much that exchange impacted me. Something so small—something that was definitely just courtesy for him to make sure even the quiet-types felt like they had a place.

What's funny is that he probably wouldn't remember if you asked him. So many Guardians he met and talked to every single day...

But I remember.

Maybe I'll look for an old picture from back then…

M19

[martyr-19]

Cayde makes a face, "I'm not slapping you-" so he's just gonna grab Martyr and smooch him @of-golden-guns

Martyr’s eye-lights flicker for a moment, his hands instinctively raising to grasp Caydes.

The moment he pulls back:

“Damn shame, knew you were gettin’ soft bein’ cooped up in the Tower—“

[martyr-19]

{"guardian_login": "Martyr-19" [”ghost”: “Prophet”]}

{“id": "0430"}

{"title": "Bio:Lillian"}

{"type": "bioshare"}

{"created": "####-##-##”}

{“updated”: “####-##-##”}

4/6

Snippets of Lillian’s Guardian profile—

LILLIAN

{“guardian": "Lillian"}

{“ghost": "Casper"}

{“status”}} > deceased

{“stationed”}} > {“body-recovery”}} > [recovered] > {“ghost-recovery”}} > [located]

> [warlock, awoken]

First Vanguard Note>>

[####-##-##] > IR “Shows immense potential in the use of ark Light, but she lacks the confidence and follow through to properly employ it in the heat of battle. She must overcome her hesitation.”

Last Vanguard Note {Prior to Guardians Final Death}>>

[####-##-##] > IR “I will be approving her request for relocation to the Vanguard's research division within the EDZ.”

-

-

Fireteam {1} Insight>>

[####-##- ##-] {“year 1”}

{B}} Just wish she’d fight more and stop trying to educate me on why I shouldn’t put the mystery plant in my mouth.

{V1}} What a shame she isn’t a Titan! All that power must be put to use!

{S3}} Powerful ark Light. Excels in the backlines. Works best with a sniper rifle in her hands.

{K}} She’s a ray of sunshine— keeps us all together.

{M8}} Brilliant.

Fireteam {1} Insight>>

[####-##- ##-] {“year 2”}} “last recorded”

{B}} I actually really loved the cloak. Im sorry I didn’t wear it. The flowers were a sweet touch, not stupid.

{V1}} I hope you’re at peace. You’re missed. You’re loved. Always.

{S3}} I miss you. I miss you so much. You were the smartest, happiest person— there was so much for you still. You made the world brighter and filled it with more colour than I ever realized now that you’re gone. I’m sorry we argued before it happened. I’m sorry I never apologized. I’m sorry you’ll never see the end of the fighting. I’m sorry we’ll never start that garden. I love you.

{K}} I’ll be quicker next time.

{M8}} Your Light hasn’t stopped shining, Lilly. Not at all.

-

-

Latest Guardian Report>> “last”

{OverviewAccess}

{“attached-details”>hidden}

“Fireteam is going out to investigate the signal pinging from Nessus. It’s been thirteen days since the initial ping was received. Attempting to transcribe only comes up with static and a jumble of high frequency noises— it’s unlikely this is anything but Vex. The team is prepared to handle this operation and will exercise caution. I will report further later, once we have located the source.”

UPDATE>>

“Source seems to be a dormant Hydra. Nearly 15 feet tall— the biggest this fireteam has seen. We’ll do extra digging to make sure we’re not missing anything, then turn back and pass this to a more experienced group. We’re unprepared for dealing with this ourselves.”

-

-

There are no further reports made by Lillian.

Lillian and her Ghost met their final death on Nessus, [####-##-##].

The Guardians body was recovered within 30 days. Her Ghost remains in a fractured state across their final battlefield. While recently located, collection efforts are ongoing.

[Combining fireteam accounts]

Shortly after her updated report was logged, the fireteam were attacked by Vex. The Hydra soon became active. Each Guardian filed their own accounts, the most notable from the activation being:

{V1}} I do not know what happened. It was loud suddenly. Louder than the gunfire. Everyone was shouting. Then it got bright.

{S3}} She was too close. We couldn’t get to her in time.

{M8}} I heard the charge before I saw it. When I turned, Lillian was being hit and Keiran nearly ended up with her.

The death was described as sudden by every account.

From what I conclude, Lillian and her Ghost were caught in the first beam fired. Her Ghost destroyed near instantly and she herself [filtered] and [filtered]. Fireteam member Keiran was closest, writing that he tried to run for her the moment the Vex started warming up to fire. In his words, “Nobody had noticed, and I wasn’t fast enough.”

Lillian and Martyr-19’s last recorded correspondence took place on [####-##-##]. One day before she was killed:

>>{Lillian[warlock, awoken]}

“I’m just saying that you should consider transferring out too. At least one day. Why should our entire lives revolve around this? There’s more than that! I want to learn, that’s how I can play a part.

Maybe one day it won’t be for the Vanguard, and instead it’ll be for me! Learning everything I can about flora, fauna, and planets from around the galaxy— it’s a dream. You need one too. Everyone around here does. Nobody seems to remember we’re humanity, not just fighting for it.

The fight won’t last forever. I know I’m nowhere near the first to say it.

Every war ends. You need something or someone besides your Ghost that keeps you going when the dust settles. We’re just guns otherwise.

Those drawings you do— ever thought about painting?

Start there!

Find something. Grow. Change. Love.

It’s human!! <3

I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow, busy day!

Didn’t mean to get all profound. It’s been a long week.”

-

-

Many forgot Martyr’s existence as he locked so tightly to himself, that part is accurate. His fireteam, however, cared for him deeply. Lillian expressed such the most.

He cared for them too.

His loneliness did not have to persist, but he was afraid. I did not know what to do, so how could he? I do not blame him. From every old exchange I’ve read, neither did they.

[martyr-19]

{"guardian_login": "Martyr-19" [”ghost”: “Prophet”]}

{“id": "0150"}

{"title": "Bio:Keiren"}

{"type": "bioshare"}

{"created": "####-##-##”}

{“updated”: “####-##-##”}

5/6

Snippets of Keiran’s Guardian profile—

KEIREN

{“guardian": "Keiren"}

{“ghost": "Chance"}

{“status”}} > deceased

{“stationed”}} > {“body-recovery”}} > [impossible] > {“ghost-recovery”}} > [impossible]

> [titan, human]

First Vanguard Note>>

[####-##-##] > Z “Has shown great promise, regularly exceeding expectations during firearm training exercises. However, he still has much to learn of his Light abilities before being ready for off-planet field deployment.”

Last Vanguard Note {Prior to Guardians Final Death}>>

[####-##-##] > Z “I must express grave concerns about his recent actions. While his intentions may stem from a place of care, his reckless disregard for protocol and personal safety puts his entire fireteam at risk.

-

-

Fireteam {1} Insight>>

[####-##- ##-] {“year 1”}

{B}} Never remembers his own login. Very funny.

{V1}} Strong Titan! Headstrong is good!

{S3}} Takes too many risks and throws himself into danger. Good up front but risky all the same. Forgets to use his barrier. Best with guns but charges in with his hands empty instead. Difficult to place.

{L}} He’s got a big heart, always willing to put himself on the line for others. Reads awful romance novels and thinks none of use know, we do. Sorry Keiran!

{M8}} Impulsive.

Fireteam {1} Insight>>

[####-##- ##-] {“year 2”}} “last recorded”

{B}} I love you. I miss you. I’m sorry for always pissing you off. It’s an a, not an e.

{V1}} You were always brave. Selfless. Rest easy, brother.

{S3}} You never listened. You always put yourself into danger. We knew you’d be the one to give it all away for us, I’m sorry we couldn’t stop you from doing it.

{L}} [no comment available]

{M8}} You deserved much better than the bottom of an ocean.

-

-

Latest Guardian Report>> “last”

{OverviewAccess}

{“attached-details”>hidden}

“Fireteam has landed on Titan. Hive numbers, as reported, are higher than usual. We’ll be investigating what has them worked up, check-in’s being done every half hour.”

UPDATE>>

“Fireteam is being overrun.”

-

-

Keiran and his Ghost perished on Titan, [####-##-##]. This death was approximately 6-7 months after the loss of fireteam member Lillian and served as a the true breaking point of the group.

[combining fireteam accounts]

Reports indicate the fireteam was overpowered by Hive forces outside the New Pacific Arcology. Accounts describe that in a final effort to ensure the survival of the remaining four Guardians, Keiran collapsed an unstable platform support after the others had crossed to safety.

The result claimed both Keiran and the Hive forces, initially from the impact of sliding shipping containers while trailing units were eliminated by the complete collapse of the platform structure into the ocean. Keiran's body and associated Ghost remain unrecovered, with no detectable signal or coordinates to their current location. The extreme water pressure at such depths makes retrieval efforts highly inadvisable.

Multiple attempts have been made to change the name of file from ‘Keiren’ to ‘Keiran’. Status pending.

Keiran and Martyr-19’s last recorded correspondence took place on [####-##-##]. Three days before the incident on Titan:

>>{Keiren[titan, human]}

“Vuass helping that Fallen was insane, right? Both just laying down their weapons? Since when do they do that?

He’s always been too soft for his own good. Somehow he didn’t end up with a shot to the head or a knife to the chest.

They looked badly injured when he’d pulled that beam off of them— I don’t think they’ll make it long out there.

You’re a Warlock—

Was it better or worse that he helped?

Does he have a point about the whole “Ally till proven enemy” thing, you think?

And why do I care?”