May 30, 2018
RAFAEL: How many times do I have to apologize for that?
MATTIE: Once would be nice!
RAFAEL:
RAFAEL: No.
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RAFAEL: How many times do I have to apologize for that?
MATTIE: Once would be nice!
RAFAEL:
RAFAEL: No.
[Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker]
RAFAEL: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.
MATTIE: ...I did. I broke it.
RAFAEL: No. No you didn't. Rhys?
RHYSAND: Don't look at me. Look at Ciro.
CIRO: What?! I didn't break it.
RHYSAND: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?
CIRO: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.
RHYSAND: Suspicious.
CIRO: No it's not!
LOTTE: If it matters, probably not, but Gabriel was the last one to use it.
GABRIEL: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!
LOTTE: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
GABRIEL: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Lotte!
MATTIE: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Rafael.
RAFAEL: No! Who broke it!?
CIRO: Rafael...June's been awfully quiet.
JUNE: REALLY?!
[Everyone starts arguing]
*later*
RAFAEL: [being interviewed] I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
MATTIE: Guys, we have a problem.
WILL: What? The fire?
MATTIE: No, the— wait, what fire?
WILL: Never mind, this sounds more interesting.
CIRO: I never know what to say to people at funerals.
MATTIE: Just say "I'm sorry for your loss", then move on.
[later at a funeral]
CIRO: Sorry for your loss. Move on.
MATTIE: You have no idea what I'm capable of!
RAFE: Don't take it personally, but I feel like I'm being threatened by a cupcake.
JUNE: He looked at me the way all women want to be looked at...
MATTIE: Awww.
JUNE: With fear in his eyes.
MATTIE:
LOTTE: Awww.
[skipping stones on a lake]
MATTIE: It's such a beautiful evening.
WILL: [whispering] Take that, you fucking lake.