Few stupid and less stupid headcanons of the Twilight universe.
A/N: These are my own opinions and I realized that I had a lot less to say about the Twilight universe than I had with TVDU. @sarahelizabeth_talks on TikTok is amazing and I pretty much agree with her every Twilight take. The stupid ones are more like they don’t have any canon content behind them so they are just what I think of.
-S
+400ish words.
The less stupid ones…
Jane and Alec view Aro as their dad and on the other hand Aro is super protective of them (especially with Jane). More than once over the centuries the twins have called Aro their father as an accident and Aro respectfully ignores it because he knows that if the twins had realized it they would have been mortified with shame.
All of the higher Volturi guards have movie nights where they talk shit and talk about any drama that’s happening with the lower guards. They also get jealous when Aro is trying to make a vampire join the coven because of their powers.
Carlisle and Aro were dating when Carlisle was a part of the coven. (Fight with the wall.) (I feel like I want to write a gothic, dark academia, religious undertones fic about them!!)
Carlisle was born in the 1700s so he is quite religious and he goes to church with Esme on major holidays. It makes him feel more human and helps him to remember how he doesn’t want to hurt people.
Rosalie and Emmett get married again every once in a while, that’s a fact. But I think Rosalie’s dresses are never pure, stark white. She likes to be a bit out of the box with stuff like this.
Jessica will be a successful woman who takes no shit from anyone. She and Angela will stay as really good friends their whole life. (Justice for the human characters!!)
The stupid ones…
After a few years of happy family life, Bella will break up with Edward and they try to co parent Rigatoni (Renesmee) but both of them are really bad at it. (After that Bella will start to drink human blood and Edward will be disgusted by it.)
Renaissance (Renesmee) will be weirded out when she realizes that her parents were so okay with the whole imprinting thing. For a while she doesn’t speak to anyone of the coven + Jacob.
If you read the similar post about the TVDU, in that one I said that all vampires are some sort of queer and I would like to say the same shit with this universe too but fuck Twilight vampires are so heteronormative.
All of the Cullens have so many unpaid speeding tickets and that's one reason why they have to move around. They also owe millions to the tax department.
Caius is a fashion nerd. The man loves expensive and luxurious clothing.
Jacob in his wolf form once slipped while running next to a river. He fell into the water being drenched. Later, all of the pack members laughed at him and he is still a bit embarrassed about it but it’s all in good fun.
Bella was really grossed out when in New Moon Edward states that he is like 109 and for a moment Bella was ready to break up with him.
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