i forgot i made Ethe actually believe L has rabies, oh god. ((she's not wrong though))
L tried to bite Ayla's hand when she got too close to the plastic-coated paper.
Ayla found it funny or, at least, was laughing as she told me about it, perhaps not realising how dangerous it was, especially since Watari has never denied the fact that L has rabies, and he clearly has some symptoms of it.
In the furious form of this disease, the animal (L, in this case) or the human presents hyperactivity, hydrophobia, severe or uncontrolled excitability. The patient is restless, agitated, moves uncontrollably, has hallucinations and high levels of confusion, with abnormal behaviour, which may include biting others.
The only symptom I have not seen in him is hydrophobia, but I have a plan to test it. Since the garden plant sprayer is not safe enough, because it may still have traces of insecticide, I have to wait for the cleaning staff to run out of products so I can get it from them. I checked the other day and one of the two they had for the windows seemed about to run out. I managed to estimate another week of use before it finishes.
As for the rest, L is a weirdo, who thinks he's an undisputed genius, who never stands still, beats people up and sits in a twisted way. He thinks my hatred for him is some kind of rivalry, something that gets him on edge, because he thinks it's a competition, which is a clear sign of confusion on his part. Furthermore, he has the impression that I am a threat (hallucinations) and, for whatever he does, he always seems to take my actions into account, showing his obsession with me (abnormal behaviour). Finally, he has recently demonstrated that he is capable of biting others.
Clearly, he has rabies and Watari is keeping this from us, assuming he does know, which makes the situation both dangerous for us around him and favourable, because it means he has not been vaccinated and is risking his life.
mazzaroth coming for my throat by reminding me of the trajectory of Lex and L's friendship just because Lex is nice to L and L thinks friendship means doing whatever the other is doing, and so he takes up tennis like him. Lex is happy about it at first, even though he does think, "well this is supposed to be my thing, but he's two years younger so you know, whatever, I can teach him", but then he's still afraid to use his legs to full potential because Ethe sprained his ankle two years ago and it hurt like a motherfucker, all while L is just getting better and better and even dares to start giving him advice, which makes Lex hate him. Lex never hates anyone, because he's just like that, but this fucking brat, man. out of frustration at hearing him talk, one time he even smashed the ball so hard it bounced back and hit him in his eye socket. nasty injury. and then the Wammy's Games of 1990 happen, where he ends up teaming with L, because Faust isn't playing and Ethe is already with Ayla, and so he has to train with him for like three weeks and they argue after the two first events because they end up second place and blame each other. and then the third event is table tennis 'cause it is raining outside and they can't do treasure hunt. during the game, L can't shut up for the love of God and just tells Lex how to do this and that, thinking he's being helpful, and Lex blows up and throws the racket at him and says that he's withdrawing from the games (two year consecutive winner btw, so it's a big deal), and L is just like, "but we'll end up last, I can't play without you". and Lex is just "great! so we can be fucking loser together!" and that's how L's first and only male friendship ends. and not only that. in this Wammy's ecosystem, if Lex hates you, it's social suicide. so any prospect of any new friendship is dead too.
I was curious about Ethe and how she interprets events. In a post you said she uses complex language to reflect how complex she believes the world to be. Would she would be prone to overcomplicating explanations for people’s actions using complex language? How does she decide how complex/nuanced a situation is?
Okay, first, a question about my OCs? SCREAMING.
I also saw that you went through my Mazzaroth tag, so thank you! And also, I don’t know if you already got an idea of what I meant, but I’m still here to answer lol.
Generally, she uses a formal tone and complicated sentence structures, with many subordinates, to the point that I think it’s sometimes hard to follow her. I need to fix some of it because I still want the story to be as understandable as possible, but most of it needs to be like this. Since her voice is from a later point in time, where she’s vomiting all her thoughts as a coping mechanism and in preparation for something, I want to show how convoluted her mind has become. When it gets to this point and there’s nobody to intervene, then it’s easier to justify all her actions. She can jump from one topic to another and link them together easily, without even having to worry about how the starting and ending point don’t even belong in the same category.
I have a scene where Lex, another OC, noticed that Ethe is hiding in her room to avoid L who came back, after she thought he was gone for good, so he goes to ask her to play trivia together as a team. He doesn’t enter her room. From the other side of the door, he tells her that he has some candies for her and that, if she doesn’t come out, he will need to give them to L so they don’t go bad. Ethe doesn’t relent and he jokes that’s going now to him, but then Ethe hears that he’s going the opposite way.
You know what she got from this conversation? He’s a liar capable of manipulating her into doing what he wants. Not that he’s trying to be kind to her, because he cares about her and is a nice person, which she doesn't deny. None of that. Just that he can be a bad person and an enemy. So, if he ever does anything that might hurt her, 1) she already predicted it, so she shouldn’t feel bad about it, but most importantly, 2) she’s allowed to retaliate.
Her omnipresent paranoia adds to this and makes it worse, because one of the stated reasons for not going down and playing with them is,
Besides, I don't want to show the connections my mind makes to people I don't consider friends and that can create a psychological and behavioural picture of me. Elioenai (B) has not fully succeeded yet and I do not want to help him in this. Seeing me next to people with whom I have no intimacy could give him too many signs to investigate and I must avoid that.
She would rather miss on everything than be perceived in any way she doesn’t approve. It’s a learned thing, because she would hide behind piles of books and stay in a fixed position for hours on end just to avoid her mother. With B, there’s the added thing that he reminds her of her father, so their sporadic partnership is definitely a fun thing I can’t wait to explore, because she thought her father couldn’t see her for how much he ignored her, while here B is cataloguing people.
Here you can find another example of how paranoid she is.
There isn’t really a cut off for when she decides how nuanced a situation is. She overcomplicates pretty much everything, and then maybe reaches a conclusion. To be honest, most of the time is, “It’s not relevant to think about it right now”, which means that she can always come back to it. She can’t let go of things. There are a lot of situations where she’s also like, “Rae and Ayla [her friends, who are getting closer to L and are in his project] have free will and they decided this course of action, and since they know what they are doing, I have no say in it” and then proceed to have a big say in it. Sometimes she just says stuff because she thinks that’s what she’s supposed to think, but without actually believing in it. She just wants to appear logical and objective and thinks a premise is enough. Consider that it’s also an older Ethe thinking back, so maybe some situations got resolved in the meantime and she just states all sides, before talking about the outcome.
The only thing I can say for sure is that the more she’s attached to someone, the more she overthinks it. She wrote 300 words in her diary about how Ayla and L seem close and wonders why, for then spending another 500 words thinking about it, meaning that older Ethe still can’t comprehend how that’s possible and won't accept Ayla finding him tolerable at all and being his friend.
On the other hand, she had this idea of friendship with Lex:
On my part, I should have prepared myself for that possibility, knowing his character, but I didn't expect to get into his graces so quickly. I had a completely different vision of how our friendship would have potentially started: he would've considered me more during lessons and, slowly, I would've gotten closer to his group, until I was fully integrated into it after at least four and a half months. In that way, I could start any conversation I wanted without feeling inadequate under any circumstances.
It was a linear and perfect process to be able to create a stable and constant friendly relation, without the need to overdo it to be liked. It was apparent that I had not fully considered the fact that he was not a passive terminal who acted and adjusted according to my will.
I also think the very fact that she's going through her diary and every meaningful interaction she has had in the past shows a degree of her overthinking everything and her believing the situation was much more complexed than it appeared. Or maybe she's making it much more complex than it is, so she can have justifications.
One last thing is that she reads a lot of books to connect. After playing football once, she started to read about the power of togetherness to apply it to her situation and how she felt. When she had to apologise to Lex for spraining his ankle, she started to tell him all the possible fun facts about football that she read in a book. She's just vomiting what she reads a lot of time, but it shows that she's not entirely capable of understanding things if she can't find a book equivalent, which feeds into her belief that yes, it is that complicated, because no one else has dealt with it.
Unfortunately, I cannot share a lot of excerpts from the story itself to show exactly what I mean by overcomplicating people's thoughts and actions, because Ethe stacks interpretations on top of other interpretations over several chapters that maybe even change what actually happened in the original scene, so it's very hard to show this here. Sorry :< Though, I hope this answer was good enough!
Thank you again for asking, I really appreciate it!
okay but it's kinda creepy to imagine being a kid in the late 1980s in an new orphanage just happily typing on a computer because wow ! a computer all of my own ! and you are having lots of fun and also staying up past your bed time so super edgy of you. and all of a sudden, the room to your door slowly creaks open and you see this menacing figure appearing on the threshold with a 600 pages long book in their hand and you already know who they are and that they don't like you and they are sort of weird like they spent hours following you everywhere and stared at you without blinking and barely even talked, acting instead as a shadow of two girls you just met . and they just stare at you, illuminated only by the computer light, and you make to ask what's up. and they just throw the book at you and leave.
Since I miss this other OC-centric fic I have, I am sharing two chapters from it that are related to Halloween, with no context whatsoever about the characters, except Natal and Elioenai being A and B.
TL;DR: Halloween Party, which ends with Ethe undergoing the most painful medieval torture possible: she has to apologise to L for a little 'trick', because he almost got all the treats.
Previous - Mazzaroth: 25th October, 1988
I think I underestimated the amount of information Elioenai has on me. I don't mean to say that he has discovered my past and surpassed L in this aspect, but, although he doesn't hide it, he is aware of various habits of mine, which are not easily remembered by people who shouldn't need them. That means he has an ulterior motive.
I am not sure what it is, unless L has decided to use him and his notebook to 'win'. It still seems surreal that he still considers it a competition, but he does, even if he moves slowly. Both of us are taking our time, actually. I guess in his case it's the fact that he can't just focus on my issue and it's hard to find out where I'm coming from without being able to ask for information from someone like Watari or get it from my file.
Only I can offer him an indication that can guide him somewhere. I had thought about giving him false information, but if I were to talk casually about my hypothetical past, he would realise that I am lying. I can't even tie it to what I said to Ayla and Rae, because he wouldn't know, and we always try to avoid making such references when in the presence of others. I can pretend that I don't see him standing next to us and say something, but if I react, he'll think it's not true, because if it was, I'd avoid drawing attention to it, but if I don't react, he'll think I'm trying to trick him.
So, whatever case may come my way, providing him with a lead is out of the question. Moreover, now that he has that haircut, he avoids leaving his room and, therefore, I cannot have him around. Generally, that's good, because I don't have to interact with him so often anymore, but it also ruins my plans, as well as his.
Ayla has created this period of truce, which I don't even know if I like. On the one hand, finally some peace of mind and I no longer feel like he's about to appear behind me every second. On the other, what is he doing? Is he working on the project? And how?
I need to know what's going on in its early stages if I want to succeed in demolishing its base as soon as Rae and Ayla get what they want. If I am not aware of this essential information, as it holds over its entire structure, I will have to rely on poorly thought-out strategies, created on the spot, in perhaps moments of panic. I cannot afford that.
However, this is not the day to focus on that. Today is Halloween. I shouldn't even be here to write. I told Ayla I had to go to the bathroom and enough minutes passed. I will update you on the matter once I understand what Elioenai is trying to get from me.
Reluctantly, I closed the diary and hid it under Ayla's mattress. I put my costume back on and, after waiting a few seconds to see if L would come out of his room, because I thought I heard movement coming from there, even though it was probably the pigeon he was still looking after, I went downstairs, taking care not to touch the handrail so that the black and orange paper decorations attached to the inner side wouldn't come off.
I passed by Watari, who was watching two gentlemen place a banner, which read 'Halloween 1988', on the railing of the platform that connected the two flights of stairs.
The party had not yet started: the last decorations were missing, and the others still had to change. Ayla and I had been ready since that morning. We had come down with our costumes by nine o'clock, even though we knew it always started around half past five in the afternoon. I didn't mind, even if it meant not being able to have a real conversation. I wanted to stay in the part as much as possible; therefore, I had to limit myself to simple movements with my head in order to communicate with her.
I had to admit, though, that this condition of voluntary silence allowed me not to have to worry about saying anything. I could walk away again from uncomfortable conversations, although I hadn't had many since Lex had started avoiding me, and have a valid justification for doing so. Ghosts did not follow the rules of humans and limited themselves to frightening noises, which I could use if they persisted in speaking to me.
Watari noticed me and smiled slightly, before returning to his task. I walked towards the canteen, where Ayla was busy watching a man place flameless candlesticks inside small pumpkins and pass them to her so she could put them in different spots. She was not alone in helping. There was also Rell, whom Ayla had decided to challenge to see who would place the most. Despite knowing he would lose, Rell had accepted and, even when he was clearly at a disadvantage, had persevered.
"Finally!" Ayla exclaimed, noticing me. "I thought you went to L!"
I wanted to retort about the impossibility and absurdity of that idea, but I couldn't. I simply shook my head and positioned myself to the left of Rell, who appeared to be the one most capable of grabbing first the pumpkin, that seemed to be also the last one, meaning he had taken my place during my absence, and I would have to find a way to move him from there. I had already stepped on his foot, pinched his arm, pretended to fall on top of him, hit his hands and touched his left shoulder, so that he would think someone was trying to get his attention, and I was beginning to run out of short-term solutions to stop him. Also, I had the impression that he had become defensive, because he kept giving me side glances and had his body slightly away from mine.
"Whoever places this one wins everything," Rell proposed and Ayla agreed, without any hesitation
"Don't cry when you lose, though!"
As the gentleman was about to close the pumpkin, I pretended to stretch and raised my arm to the height of Rell's face, covering his view with the sheet.
"Ethe! Come on!" he squealed, trying futilely to get it off his face.
Ayla managed to grab the object and run away. Hearing her footsteps and seeing her dart off to his right, Rell followed her, though he didn't have the same speed as her and I doubted he would be able to steal it before she put it in its place.
"Children, don't...!" the man began to admonish them, but he dropped the matter and sighed, before turning to me. "Do you need anything?"
I shook my head and, after a few seconds in which he stood looking at me, he threw the pieces of newspaper he had used as a tablecloth and the various remnants of the pumpkins into the rubbish and walked towards the kitchen. While waiting for Ayla's return, I laid my gaze on the garden, which could be seen through the French windows that were still open, despite the fact that the weather was not the best and there was the smell of impending rain.
"Why are you dressed like that?"
I was caught off guard by that question, although I was the one who was supposed to terrify others that day. Fortunately, L couldn't have noticed that reaction of mine and I didn't have to interact with him, because, technically, ghosts could appear and disappear at will; thus, I could simply pretend not to be in his presence, although I wanted to ask him how he had recognised me.
He asked me another question, but I couldn't figure it out, because he was chewing on something and, when he decided to move into my field of vision, I noticed that he had ring-shaped fizzy treats on all his fingers, except his thumb. They were from the many kinds Watari had bought for the party, which had not yet started, which meant he was not allowed to take them.
I almost told him, but since I had to stay in the part, I refrained, just as I also avoided throwing myself at him and taking them back to the kitchen. I couldn't do that, both because ghosts lacked that ability and I didn't want him to tell me later that he was right, that I was always attacking him. Besides, they were on his fingers, the ones he kept putting in his mouth, and I didn't want to pass his rabies on to someone else.
I was going to have to make peace with myself and realise that, for the rest of that day, I would have to hold back and ignore his presence as much as possible.
"So?" He bit the treat on his index finger and began to eat it. "Who are you hiding from?"
A proposition that was already becoming difficult to follow, especially as he stood there, in front of me, chewing on something he wasn't supposed to and wearing Ayla's beanie, which he should have returned by now, because it had been fifteen days, and I knew from my own experience that he already had some hair covering the back of his head.
I would have already left, except that I had to wait for Ayla to return.
"Are you going to be like this all day?" He started waving his left hand in front of my eyes, and I could swear it was his way of teasing me, because he knew there was nothing I could do.
However, I noticed something that pulled me away from that feeling of discomfort for a few seconds: his sleeve, at wrist level, had something yellowish in colour, similar to cream.
"This situation is—"
"Won, won, won!" Ayla entered the cafeteria and I turned towards her, so that she could jump into my arms, as she did every time she won any competition like that – improvised and mostly based on running.
"Why are you dressed like that too?" L asked, as Ayla pulled away from me and I made sure I hadn't ruined her braids, and then, pointed to her hat. "Nice. Can I have it?"
"No! And I know! It's Halloween! The best party!" my best friend replied, though it seemed rather obvious, as the banner Watari was hanging also featured that inscription.
"Anniversary of the structure?"
"No, it's... You know!" Ayla said, but L continued not to understand.
She laid her gaze on me for a second, as if asking for help, but I kept quiet.
"We dress up as scary characters. We have fireworks at eleven, if we're lucky. We eat sweets. It's a party. The best!"
"Why didn't anyone tell me anything?"
That condition was beginning to be unbearable, because I wanted both to tell him it was because no one liked him and we didn't want to include him, but also to ask him how he didn't know, since he'd written on the Halloween list what he wanted.
"Have you never celebrated it?" Ayla asked him and L shook his head. "Oh. Um... So, you're in luck! Ethe didn't know about it either, but now, she takes it very seriously, because Wammy's House has the best Halloween party ever."
My favourite costume had turned into a curse, but I didn't want L to ruin that too. I just had to keep Ayla as far away from him as possible so she wouldn't reveal everything she knew about me.
"Ethelinda didn't—" L started, but I grabbed Ayla's hand, as she had cast a spell that gave me that ability when I absolutely needed it, and started dragging her away, towards the second floor.
She verbally expressed her momentary confusion at my gesture, but did not rebel, probably understanding the different reasons I had for doing so. To be honest, I didn't know where to go and had no idea why I had brought her all the way there, when even taking refuge in Watari's presence would have dissuaded him from continuing to interrogate Ayla, but once at the top of the stairs, I didn't need to find a destination.
"Are you mad?" Faust asked and both Ayla and I turned to look at the open door to Lex's room.
"Come on now, you're fine! Get out."
Faust was pushed out of the room, risking tripping over his own feet. Both Ayla and I were confused to see his costume. Over trousers and a dark blue T-shirt, he wore a purple dress that came down to his knees and a black cloak, both made of wrapping tissue paper. He held in his hand a stick detached from a tree, from which he had torn the leaves, which was visible by the fact that the pieces of twigs to which they were attached still remained. Lastly, on his head, he had a purple cylindrical shaped paper from which hung strips of normal yellow paper.
It was definitely in theme with the festivity, not only because it was horrifyingly ugly.
"Are you kidding me?!" Ayla blurted out and I tried to stop her from charging at him, squeezing her hand and putting my feet firmly on the ground, but she still managed to move me a few steps forward. "Why are you dressed like that! Do you think this is funny?!"
Faust looked bewildered and it took him a couple of seconds before he did anything.
He turned to look at Lex, still inside the room. "You...!" he mimicked something with his lips that I couldn't understand, but it must have been pretty funny, because Lex's laughter reached our ears.
"Why is he laughing! It's not funny! Get changed!" Ayla continued.
Soon after, Lex appeared on the landing, and I found myself holding my breath. He tried to cross his arms over his chest but, realising that this would ruin his mummy costume made of toilet paper, he let it go and turned to look in our direction.
His smile immediately faded as he realised I was there too. Mentally, I asked him to tell me something – anything – just to stop feeling invisible in his eyes, but he lowered his gaze and re-entered the room, while an expression of concern took possession of Faust's face.
"Lex—"
"You still haven't told me why you're dressed like that!" Ayla thundered.
"Shut up." He waved his hand in annoyance and followed Lex inside the room, closing the door behind him.
I felt a lump form in my throat.
He wouldn't have reacted like that if I had apologised to him. I felt horrible, because that day was also his first real Halloween inside the facility. The year before, he had arrived at Wammy's a couple of days before the holiday. I was not his close friend and had not heard him say those words, but it seemed to me that he had been waiting for that moment for a while, considering the effort he had put into his costume, which was much more than a simple vampire costume.
And I had ruined it.
"They're so weird... And obnoxious. Did he really tell me to shut up?" Ayla stood still for a moment, observing where Faust was, before turning to me, resting her hands on my shoulders. "We'll deal with them later. I secretly drank half an orangeade and have to go to the bathroom. Wait for me here."
I nodded, but took advantage of that moment alone to return to my room. Although I had spent two weeks figuring out how best to make it up to him, the subsequent actions that followed were anything but calculated, because I was driven by the urgency to settle that matter before the day was over. Before I became a real ghost in his eyes.
I tore a page out of Mazzaroth, unable to find anything else, because my binders only had newspaper articles and not sheets of paper to write on.
I improvised a very short letter of apology, in which I did not explain the reason for it or specify the wrong I had done, only that I was sorry. I also added a little sad face, so that he would understand that I was not indifferent, even though it had taken me a long time to do so. I folded the paper in two and, just before Ayla came out of the bathroom, I managed to slip it under the door of his room and settle on the spot where my best friend had left me.
At five fifty-seven, since it had taken them longer than expected to centre the banner, Ayla and I were the first to set up in front of the camera, because she wanted us to be in the front row, although we were already likely to end up there, since there were other people taller than us.
Gradually, other residents took their places around us. Ayla made sure to keep the space to her left reserved for Rae, who hadn't been out of Daralis' room all day, except for lunch. It wasn't unusual for her to be among the last to arrive; therefore, I didn't feel the anxiety Ayla felt about her being 'late'. We all were, in the end.
The place to my right remained vacant until I saw L leave the canteen and approach, with two caramel apples in his left hand and one in his right hand, which he was licking. I hadn't had a chance to check how much he had eaten, but I was deeply concerned that he had finished everything before the party started.
I gave Ayla a light pinch and, when I got her attention, interrupting the conversation she was having with Rell, dressed as a zombie, I pointed at L with my head.
"One, please," she said, extending a hand towards him, and L shook his head.
It wasn't exactly what I wanted her to say, and my hatred for that costume grew out of all proportion. Something that had managed to give me calm was becoming a real prison, because it did not allow me to spend a day in peace, observing others and not having to put effort into anything. On the contrary, it was preventing me from having a say. And it was all L's fault, because he was giving me a reason to have it.
"You can't eat them all!" Ayla shouted.
"Bet?" L asked, taking another lick at the caramel.
Ayla tried to take one from his left hand, but L swung them away from her grasp, hitting the arm of – I realised at that moment – Lex, who was passing behind him. The caramel from the two apples clung to the paper and L, without any consideration, pulled them away, ending up tearing Lex's costume in two different places and leaving brownish stains behind.
Silence fell in the main hall, and everyone laid eyes on the three – or, perhaps, four, since Faust was next to Lex.
"Hit Faust now, too," Ayla whispered towards L, partly covering her mouth with her hand. "In the face, though."
Lex did not seem angry or annoyed as he merely sighed with a slight smile on his lips as he examined the damage.
"That'll teach you," Faust told him, receiving an elbow in the stomach in response.
"It's not my fault." L extended in his direction his hand with the two apples that still had pieces of paper on them. "Do you want one?"
Lex shook his head no, without saying a single word, which I found strange, because it didn't seem like him to be so quiet.
Had my letter of apology not been enough?
"Come on, guys. Just a few more minutes and we'll take the picture."
Everyone turned in the direction of Watari's voice, but I continued to look at Lex, hoping he'd lay his gaze on me for just a second so I could understand his state of mind.
"You know that looks like shit...?" Faust risked getting elbowed again, but dodged it in time, pushing, then, Lex forward. "Come on, Toilet-man. Tell me where."
That was the last thing I understood, as they disappeared behind Elioenai and Natal, who hadn't dressed up at all, just like in the past years, because they considered that part of the party to be childish. They then appeared on the other side, being far enough away that I couldn't hear them.
"Do you still want them?" I heard L ask and started to turn around, but my attention was caught by Rae and Daralis hurrying down the stairs.
Their costumes were far more elaborate than everyone else's, a sign that Castalina had contributed in some way, but the most peculiar aspect was the fact that they were matching costumes: Daralis' was of an evil stepmother, with similar features typical of the cartoons they showed on television, while Rae's was of a princess, which simply didn't quite fit the theme; so she had added patches of red to the pink fabric and had applied some grey make-up to the sides of her face and purple around her eyes, to give her a cadaverous appearance.
They stopped at my side.
"How do I look? How do we look, more like?" she asked and I, not knowing how else to communicate to her that the costumes were beautiful, applauded, even if it produced a dull sound.
However, Rae seemed pleased, as she giggled and cast a glance in the direction of Daralis, who, though, had a confused expression.
"Why doesn't she speak?"
"She takes her role very seriously," Rae answered her for me, and I nodded.
"But there are ghosts that can talk, aren't there?"
Did they exist? As far as I could tell, they were entities that could not communicate with the living through words.
Rae just shrugged it off. "So, she's one of those who doesn't talk."
Daralis arched an eyebrow, not so convinced by that answer, but dropped the conversation and turned to Faust, asking him what he was dressed as.
Looking at her better, her evil and ugly stepmother's costume was made for her.
Rae looked at Faust too, and I noticed that Lex had his gaze on her, probably surprised, for the second time, at how much effort she had put into that day, as I remembered that he had also been enchanted looking at her the year before. Everyone liked her bat costume, so I couldn't blame him. Every time she raised her arms, her wings were revealed, and by the end of the day, she had found herself in pain, for how many times she had been asked to do it, especially by Ayla.
Rae pointed to his arm and, immediately, Lex began to explain what had happened. I would have liked to understand his point of view, but Ayla and L's bickering to my right and the general confusion did not allow me to. It was difficult even to read his lips, as he was talking in such a rapid-fire manner that the tops of his ears, which peeked out between two strips of toilet paper, had turned red.
"Everyone ready?" Watari asked, passing to our right, followed by Roger and the photographer.
Ayla turned back to me, to return to her spot, and I was speechless to see her holding the two apples that had hit Lex.
"I don't know how it happened either," she said and held one out to me. "If I'm holding two for the picture, I'll look rude. Please."
I sighed, but agreed to do her that favour, even though we would look like friends with L, who had decided to stay to my right. To his, Watari placed himself and, if the situation was already unbearable on its own, at that very moment, I began to feel a sense of jealousy that the owner had chosen that place. Although far away from me, I would have preferred him to swap with Roger on the other side of the group, but it was too late for that.
"On the count of three..." the photographer said. "One."
"It's going to be pretty boring with you not talking," L said.
"Two."
I cast him a quick glance, noticing Watari's hand resting on his left shoulder.
That was supposed to be my spot.
"Three."
Half a second before the flash hit us, my apple slammed into L's face, striking part of his eye and cheek. L groaned slightly, though not in pain, as I hadn't used enough force. He took a step backwards, knocking into Watari, who let out a cry of surprise.
As was the custom, most of those present immediately ran towards the canteen, as they could finally stuff themselves with all the sweets L had spared. In short, it was not possible to take another photo. Only Ayla, Elioenai and Natal remained to observe the scene closely.
The anti-justice tried to counterattack, starting to wave his apple, attempting to hit me, but Watari intervened before the impact, taking those sweets turned into weapons out of our hands.
"Can't you be peaceful even today?" he asked, shifting his gaze between L and me.
"I didn't hit her, though," L replied, extending his hand, and I heard Elioenai giggle behind my back, but I ignored him as much as I could.
"And you won't hit her now either," Watari said firmly, which led L to huff sonorously and whisper that it wasn't fair.
The owner then ordered Roger to take all the apples and help L clean himself. Once Ayla's closest hand was free, I grabbed it, pointing with my gaze to the kitchen so she could finally eat her favourite sweets.
"Not so fast, Ethelinda. In my office," Watari ordered, and since I expected it, I obeyed without much fuss, heading off with Ayla. "I said only Ethelinda, Ayla."
"But...! But she's a ghost!" Ayla retorted, raising her wand. "You need me! She cannot speak to mere humans!"
"Mere humans...?" Watari frowned. "I thought witches and wizards could identify each other in the crowd." He moved the right side of his jacket aside slightly, pulling out from an inside pocket a beautiful handmade wand with a star on top and orange tulle strips.
Ayla's eyes widened as she saw it and, leaving my hand, she lunged at it. Watari chuckled as he handed it to her. Ayla turned to show it to me, but I could not take my eyes off her face, which shone of its own light and illuminated everything around her.
She looked like the Sun, and I felt like a planet in her system, which could only hope to orbit her until the end of her days.
I longed to capture that moment, to grab a camera and take a picture of her, even though I understood that nothing could ever encapsulate all that Ayla represented. Only my retina and my memory could do that and, as I had continuously done since I had first met her, I carefully observed her sparkling eyes, her harmonious smile, her perfect dimples, the way her braids danced every time she moved her head and how she made purple a perfect colour, even though she had decided it was her personal mission to destroy it. It was no mystery how she had done it, because it wasn't the purple that added to her, it was she who added a new sense of existence to it – to everything and everyone.
"I will pretend that you are smiling," she said and, like an order, I found myself clapping, which again caused a dull sound, but it seemed enough, because her smile grew bigger.
"Ethe—" Watari began but was interrupted by Ayla.
"Where's the rest?... I mean... Thank you, Riri." She hugged him, holding him tightly around the waist for a few seconds only to, then, look up at him. "But where's the rest?"
Watari chuckled slightly. "If you allow me to talk to Ethelinda, I promise you will find it on your bed next year."
Ayla turned to look at me and I gave her my approval with a nod.
They pulled away and, putting a hand on my shoulder, Watari led me into his office. The conversation that followed was not much different from how I had imagined it to be: he reprimanded me for my behaviour, and I knew there wasn't much to argue about, since there was photographic proof of my intentional act, and I was a ghost.
However, Watari felt compelled to rectify that problem of mine by casting a spell on me that would allow me to be heard by any human, although it was obvious that there was one in particular to whom I would have to address a few words or, rather, an apology.
For that, I did everything in my power not to be in L's presence, levitating away at the mere sight of him and dragging Ayla along behind me, under the pretext of wanting to get a full tour of all the pumpkins she'd arranged to get the fullest picture of her crushing victory. She had been quite enthusiastic in doing so and it would have been the perfect way to spend the evening, if only it wasn't for Rell who had decided of his own accord to follow us and interrupt her several times as she spoke, perhaps believing that his input was implicitly sought and taken into account. It was not.
Still, his presence prolonged the confrontation they had at every pumpkin, which postponed my punishment. Besides, as much as I didn't particularly like it, Lex had taken it upon himself to keep L company, even inviting him to his table at dinnertime. Honestly, it felt like Lex's way of rubbing it in that my apology had been a failure and that he would rather be friends with the anti-justice than with me. It seemed I had to give up the illusion that I could fix our relation and instead embrace the reality that I was the most detestable person in the establishment, not even knowing exactly the reason how I had hurt him so deeply.
I thought back to him, to the possibility of coming face to face with him and apologising, and I imagined his reaction to be similar to Lex's: total silence, total apparent indifference, which concealed all the hatred he felt towards me. And I had to take refuge on the second floor with the excuse of indigestion, even though I put all the sweets Ayla handed me back into her favourite cup, hidden in her secret spot, so that she would have some for the next day. Rae had offered to tell the nurse, but I had declined, saying I would go and lie down for a bit and then join them for the fireworks, a proposition I had no intention of carrying out.
A few minutes before the show, I was in the hallway, settled with my back to the door of my room and Mazzaroth on my thighs to keep me company. I told myself that, if I really wanted to see it, I would look out of the library window facing the park, but I already knew that I would hardly get up from there, as I had chosen that position, making sure to close all the doors, so as not to hear anyone. Consequently, seeing them would have been counterproductive. However, it was not only because of that that I did not get up.
The light footsteps of a person who could only make my day worse made themselves heard on the stairs. I tried to ignore him as much as I could, because paying attention to him would make him think I was in some way waiting for him, but it was hard for me not to at least cast a glance at him. It was then that my attention was caught by the fact that he was wiping his lower lip from something with the sleeve of his shirt, which made the reason for his strange request obvious.
"I hope this is your last one… Here," I said, turning back to look in front of me.
"Was it that obvious?" His voice didn't show any surprise at my discovery, because he hadn't really tried to hide it.
I said nothing, because letting him know how I had found out only served to enlarge his ego. He would have wondered how I knew about the cupcakes and come to the illogical conclusion that I had searched the notebook for his name or any indication leading to him.
"Did you really eat nine cupcakes?" I asked.
"Watari thought they were too many, so mini tarts... So mini," he replied and seemed really dejected by the change. "Do you have any gifts for me, Ethelinda?"
I couldn't believe I was about to say that, when I hadn't even done anything that severe. It was possible to consider it just a little 'trick', as Americans used to do during that period. At least, that was what the television showed. Some of the kids had asked if we could also pour onto the street and annoy the neighbours, but Watari had forbidden us to do so.
"I'm..." I sighed deeply and for a few seconds too long. "Sorry."
"I didn't hear you."
"Clean your ears. I'm not going to repeat it, and I was loud enough. Watari just told me to do it, not to make sure you heard it."
"Oh... I'll specify that next time too."
"You didn't—"
I was interrupted by Ayla's voice, accompanied by her quick footsteps, calling me and letting me know that the fireworks were about to begin.
"You did not predict that," I whispered to L, before Ayla could reach the floor and learn that I had to apologise.
Since I miss this other OC-centric fic I have, I am sharing two chapters from it that are related to Halloween, with no context whatsoever about the characters, except Natal and Elioenai being A and B.
TL;DR: B (13) being very creepy towards a 9 year old, only because she entered his room without permission.
Next - Mazzaroth: 31st October, 1988
Halloween is only a few days away and there is already a certain air of impatience. I suppose it is because there will be a lot of strangely shaped candy available to us, because not everyone dresses up; therefore, it would be wrong to attribute that motivation to everyone to be excited about the arrival of the 31st of October.
Like the previous two years, I plan to dress up as a ghost, because it is an effective costume in arousing the emotions that such a celebration requires in order to work.
Ayla will dress up as a witch, which is scary only for the likelihood that someone will say something about her wearing purple and she will get angry. She hates it deeply, because she thinks it is a colour that doesn't even know what it wants to be. According to her, it tries to be mysterious and, at the same time, friendly, but it's just ugly.
I'm not sure what Rae will wear, because she always tries to surprise us in some way. I guess we'll both have to wait until the big reveal, but I'm sure it will be pretty eye-catching. Two years ago, she dressed up as a wicked stepmother and, usually, it's Watari who buys the costumes – the ones that are missing, mostly, because we tend to rotate them amongst ourselves (and they're few, since there are few creatures to choose from) –, but I think she got help from Castalina, because it was pretty elaborate.
As for the rest, I don't know the habits of the others to be able to predict their costumes, except for The Dame and Zhee, who always pair up. The Dame dresses as a dame, although she cannot have the actual iron armour, and Zhee as a composer of that time, with a long tunic – which is very similar to the tablecloth I use, but it is coppery in colour and he does not put it on his head –, and a strange cap that hangs to the left.
I have not yet immersed myself in that period of history completely, as I have no reason to read books about people with whom I am not on friendly terms, but I am beginning to understand better the world from which The Dame comes from. She gave us her favourite book and Ayla and I haven't finished it yet, but it is quite interesting.
It is about a young girl – vague, because her age is never hinted at – who finds herself becoming a dame at the exact moment when a battle breaks out against the enemy kingdom. The first in line is captured and she ends up having to give orders on how to best win the war. We have reached the point where she has to swear an oath of allegiance before the king, which means we have not advanced that far. We are on the fifty-sixth page, because Ayla falls asleep every twelve to fifteen pages. I suppose it's because she's not sad enough, which is good, but I wish I could finish the book and see how it ends, since I'm used to completing them in a day, two at the most, whereas she sometimes tends to start and abandon them, because they bore her, and I feel obliged to read them for her and tell her what happens.
About Lex... Last year he didn't dress up, because he didn't think it was a big party, but I heard he'd like to try being a vampire this year. I haven't spoken to him, and between us, there is the situation I was so desperate to get, but I don't like it, because I still have that unfinished business. He keeps avoiding me and, whenever his gaze meets mine, he turns the other way. I am mentally working on the letter of apology, but it is more difficult than I imagined and there are no books that tell you how to write it. I'll have to improvise, like Rae does.
I don't remember if I told you, but she continues to be interested in the world of acting. I continue to be sceptical about this new passion of hers. She doesn't say anything to me or Ayla, but we see that she brings several books on the subject to her room. They are mainly biographies of various actors and a few screenplays.
I have never seen her practise and cannot judge her skill based on her first test run on Ayla and me. I do wonder, though, if it is related in any way to her entry into the Apex, because the two events fell more or less simultaneously.
I'm not saying it's not possible that she spontaneously started liking it. I just have a bad feeling about it, like it's some kind of dangerous activity she's getting into, but I don't think pretending to be a role will cause her any serious harm.
I find it strange, but I don't understand the reason for this feeling; therefore, I can't even
"Here I am!" Ayla announced her presence, sitting down at the table. "Did you miss me?"
"Terribly." I put Mazzaroth away, placing it on my lap so I could hide it from the sight of Elioenai, who, at that moment, was particularly close.
I had honestly expected him to approach while I was alone, as he would have been able to refer to my little intrusion, without being interrupted by Ayla, but as he hadn't, and I risked being suspicious while observing him, I started to write, so that the diary wouldn't even seem that important.
"What are you looking at?" Ayla turned her head to the right. "Oh! Oh… They are the ones that have to do it this year...? They really have to interact with us commoners, huh...? I bet they are screaming inside."
"I don't think they see us that way," I told her. "They're just more reserved."
"Yes!" she exclaimed. "V.H.P.! That's what they think they are. Very high-profile!"
"You mean VIP?"
Ayla looked at me confused.
"Very important person," I clarified.
She took a while to answer, and I was about to explain her mistake, but she shrugged.
"Same thing. They think they are better than us! So annoying!" She picked up her fork and began to separate the food in the order she would eat it, while I noticed a movement out of the corner of my eye, but avoided moving my gaze in that direction, because I already knew what it meant. "The only good thing is that they've stopped bothering me since they've been in the Apex."
She had explained to me in detail what the two of them were up to years ago. They loved tormenting her, as she was the youngest child within Wammy's and the only one under the age of five required to be a member. One of her earliest memories was them wetting her favourite puppet and putting it in the freezer. This had changed when they had gained access to the Apex or, rather, when they had created that rank.
"That's not true. We're just refining our tactics," Natal commented with a smile, approaching our table.
"We will attack when you least expect it," Elioenai added, patting her lightly on the back, narrowly managing to dodge Ayla's fork and ending up settling to my left.
I avoided looking at him, keeping my eyes in front of me and tightening my grip on Mazzaroth, fearing that Elioenai might steal it away with a swipe of his hand. I didn't really believe he would do that in such a public place and especially with my best friend present, but there was still a small percentage that he would decide to do the unthinkable.
"So..." Natal shifted her attention from Ayla to me.
"Pumpkin-shaped jelly sweets," my best friend replied.
"Already written down. You ask them every year."
"So why are you here? Get lo—"
"Can I see the list?" I intervened in the conversation, before Ayla could say her piece and make them leave.
"Why?" Elioenai asked. "Do you think we are stupid cunts that can't even write?"
"Elioenai..." Natal reprimanded him, albeit rather softly.
"What, that's a valid question. I want to know if she still thinks that."
"Of course! And don't bother her," Ayla answered for me, but regardless, I had no intention of entertaining any bickering with Elioenai.
Natal handed me the pad and took off his glasses, placing them on his head. I put it down on the table and used only my left hand to flip through it.
"When will you use the old ones again?" Ayla asked.
"They were ugly... They were a disgusting neon green. Preferably never."
"But you were so easy to notice and avoid!"
Natal chuckled. "Another reason not to wear them so you don't see me coming."
I soon realised that my goal would prove more difficult to achieve, because everything was written in Natal's perfect handwriting and there was nothing to indicate who had asked for what. There were no aliases or initials, only numbers relating to the amount of bags that would be needed to satisfy all the kids, which ranged from a minimum of one to a maximum of three.
It would have taken me longer to analyse each point and work out how likely it was to have been a request from him, but the conversation between Ayla and Natal was slowly coming to an end and I didn't want to seem interested in anything specific. I decided, therefore, to abandon that search. I could always resume it later, asking Watari directly to show me the list.
Suddenly, Elioenai's hand took control, going back a few pages and pointing to an entry under the current year in the upper part, which, before his intervention, was partly hidden by the fold of the previous sheet.
"Curious, isn't it?" he asked in a low voice, as if he did not want to be heard by the others, which decided the tone of the conversation we would have. "He added it, before anyone else."
I didn't answer immediately, because the idea that he had foreseen what I was looking for made me extremely uncomfortable, but it was definitely interesting what that chicken-scratch print reported.
'9 cupcakes + handcuffs'.
"Do you think he plans to share them with us? The cupcakes?" Elioenai continued, and when I looked up at him, I noticed a smile on his lips. "Us in the project, I mean."
Was he making fun of me? Did he think that bringing up that failing attempt to create something so absurd would make me act irrationally and reveal my intrusion? Or was it just a matter of making me feel inferior?
"He is not that generous, and you are more than nine." I rearranged the pages and handed him the notepad.
"You haven't written anything."
"It's not required."
I regretted saying that, because it would have been better to tell him that what I wanted was already written down, since they tended to be the same sweets and I could have repeated Ayla's words, but it wasn't my thing to write anything on that list. I had avoided doing it the previous two years – the first because I wasn't used to it and the second because my only request to buy me something had nothing to do with that holiday –, but I didn't know if Elioenai was aware of it and revealing that information about me meant that he would have added it to his encyclopaedia on the people inside the Wammy's House.
"Yes, but if you give me the list back, without writing anything down, someone might think you are up to some shady business," he retorted and tried to sound rather innocent in that remark of his, but it was beginning to be more and more apparent what the truth was.
The questions, then, appeared to be two: how had he found out and what was he going to do, should he get concrete proof that it was me who had entered his room?
"Don't you have to be somewhere else?" I said in a normal volume of voice, which managed to get Ayla and Natal's attention, and raised the notebook as high as I could to his eye level, so that he would stop giving me that derisive look.
He grabbed it, but did not take it out of my hands. He merely moved it to the side, and since he had more strength than I did, it was hard for me to fight him off, so I let him go.
"You know my routine?"
Trick question. He didn't have one. He followed Natal, which meant he indirectly had one, but that wasn't the same thing.
"Why should I care?" I answered him. "The food will get cold because of you."
"Oh, yes, sorry. Let's go, Elioenai," Natal said, signalling his best friend to follow him towards the other tables.
Elioenai took a few seconds too long to respond to that order and didn't look as happy as he did at the beginning of that discussion, but he tried to mask it with a smile that couldn't reach his eyes.
He decided to pass behind me and, on instinct, I moved Mazzaroth to the left.
"I don't see Rae, though..." he whispered behind me, before reaching Natal.
