#mbtiq

[mr-entj]

which things you dislike the most about each mbti personality type? what are the things you think should be improved of their natural tendencies?

Related answers:

1) welcome back! You were missed! 2) Do you think certain MBTI types are prone to certain problematic behaviors and 3) if so which ones really bother you or you dislike?

As an ENTJ what do you appreciate about the other MBTI types?

By perceiving function:

High Ne (ENFP, ENTP, INFP, INTP): Flaky and unreliable. Struggles with consistency, follow through, and discipline. Prone to being impractical and unrealistic. Quitters.

High Se (ESFP, ESTP, ISFP, ISTP): Short-sighted and superficial. Struggles with seeing the big picture and underlying connections. Prone to optimizing for short-term benefits over long-term gains. Reckless.

High Ni (INTJ, INFJ, ENTJ, ENFJ): Vague and unrealistic. Struggles with concrete details and constraints needed to make their ideas work. Prone to perfectionism and delusions of grandeur. Know-it-alls.

High Si (ISTJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ESFJ): Concrete and rigid. Struggles with deviating from tried and true methods. Prone to dismissing novel ideas as unrealistic, annoying, and unwelcomed; risk averse to a fault. Killjoys.

By judging function:

High Fe (ESFJ, ENFJ, ISFJ, INFJ): Scripted and impersonal. Struggles with nuance, exceptions, and subjectivity to standard and expected behaviors ('social norms'). Prone to passive aggression and messiah complexes. Pushovers.

High Fi (INFP, ISFP, ENFP, ESFP): Subjective and rigid. Struggles with compromise and perceiving everything systematic as an attack on individuality, freedom, and creativity. Prone to martyr complexes. Victims.

High Te (ESTJ, ENTJ, ISTJ, INTJ): Systematic and impersonal. Struggles with nuance, exceptions, subjectivity to standard thinking ('common sense') and the unpredictable things that make humans-- human. Prone to impatience. Bulldozers.

High Ti (INTP, ISTP, ENTP, ESTP): Nuanced and chaotic. Struggles with creating scalable, standardized, and automated systems that work for the majority of people. Prone to overcomplicating everything. Trolls.

[mr-entj]

Welcome back Mr. ENTJ. :) ENFJ here with a quest if you don't mind. I hear a lot that "Fe is fake" which I understand where that perspective comes from. If that is a common downside to having Fe (being fake or inauthentic), what would be a common downside to having Fi which seems to be all about authenticity? Thank you for considering my question.

Stubborn and uncompromising. You see it the most in unhealthy FPs (INFP, ISFP, ENFP, ESFP) who have the 'me against the world' / 'I'm an outsider' mentality. The world will not change to accommodate them and they won't change to accommodate the world so it's a stalemate. Hence, uncompromising.

Also, Fe isn't "fake," but unhealthy FJs (ENFJ, ESFJ, INFJ, ISFJ) who are usually enneagram 2s or 9s tend to prioritize the group over the individual, people-please, and avoid conflict. This can lead them to suppress their own wants/needs and mirror other people's opinions for the sake of group harmony. Dealing with these FJs can feel like chewing gum with the wrapper still on-- I can taste a bit of your personality, but it's heavily filtered, dulled, and muted behind a wall of social niceties. Show me who you are when you're alone.

[mr-entj]

Mr entj, i am an enfp 3w2 and have an entj boss. What do entjs look for in the people they lead and manage? How do entjs define capability and competency? I would like to maximize my chances of success. Ps: as a 3w2 i am more disciplined and organized than enfp stereotypes and am often mistaken for an enfj. Thanks in advance!!!!

Related to the following asks:

What do you think is required from a person to succeed ?

Do you have any experience with hiring or selecting people to be on your team? 

ENTJ: Leadership

can you talk about managing people + dealing with politics, especially in the workplace?

I define capability as the menu of skills a person has to drive outcomes. I define competence as a person's ability to correctly, consistently, and reliably apply those menu of skills to actually deliver said outcomes. You can have one but not the other. There are people who are capable but incompetent (poor application of skills, unreliable as shit) and there are competent people who have poor capabilities (consistent, but with a limited ranged of skills). In your career, MBTI aside, try to maximize both.

For the people I hire, I evaluate them on 3 dimensions:

Cognitive ability - your ability to solve complex problems

Execution skills - your ability to deliver outcomes

Emotional intelligence - your ability to play nice with other people

Thoughts on how to work with an ENTJ leader (applicable to INTJs):

Always keep the end goal in mind. Understand the outcomes the ENTJ is trying to drive and use that as a north star, don't just 'do the thing and get it done quickly'. Forget the details for a second, instead ask: What is the end state we're trying to achieve? Where are we trying to go? What do we need to do to get there? All actions should drive towards those outcomes. ENTJs are less concerned about the small details which gives you flexibility in the process (the 'how') as long as the outcomes (the 'what') are achieved. This also makes it easy to ruthlessly prioritize if you're overwhelmed. If it doesn't contribute to the end goal, then cut it. If it contributes to the end goal, then do it and measure the impact.

Exercise radical ownership. If the outcomes aren't achieved, you need to understand and explain why. It's okay to screw up because we all screw up. It's not okay to screw up, try to hide the fact you've screwed up, try to make excuses for screwing up, and then learn nothing from your mistakes (basically, don't be an ENTP). The best way to show an ENTJ that you've learned from your mistakes is pretty simple: bring solutions with every problem surfaced. It shows the ENTJ you've 1) identified the problem 2) accepted accountability and 3) taken actions to fix it. No need for exaggerated apologies, dramatics, and theatrics. Learn, fix, keep calm and carry on.

Be proactive. Related to the above. If you're going to ask a question, make sure you've already attempted to research the answer. If you're going to surface a problem, make sure you've thought through some solutions. If you have a fresh new idea, make sure you've drafted a rough draft of a plan. ENTJ leaders dislike handholding or coddling people because it distracts them from the actual things they should be focused on. Time is valuable.

Communicate clearly and fearlessly. Too much work? Not enough work? Want to try something new? Need time off? Unsure if you're performing well or poorly? Want a raise? Want a promotion? Say something. TJs (ENTJ, ESTJ, ISTJ, INTJ) are vocal if they have something to say so they have the tendency to assume other MBTI types will do the same. If you don't say anything, they may assume everything is fine when it's in fact not fine (basically, don't be an FJ). Don't be scared: advocate for yourself, speak up, and work together to build a path forward.

Push your potential. In the spirit of the above bullet point, be ambitious with your personal and professional goals. Ambition is respected, not feared. Self-improvement is welcomed, not discouraged. Articulate the skills and experience you want to build, take risks, and grow outside your comfort zone.

[mr-entj]

Hi Mr ENTJ! Of all the people in your circle, who is the least similar to you and what mbti are they? Or are you generally the person who looks for people who find similar personality (behaviorally not cognitively)?

Other than successful and loyal, what other qualified that you look for in a friend?

They're INFPs.

I have a ton of INFP friends who are very different from me. Their thought process, priorities, careers, and life choices couldn't be more different but we're still friends because we have shared values, similar interests, and complementary behaviors. The thing that makes them great friends is 1) the ease in which I can speak to them openly and honestly 2) the value in getting a perspective from a type that's completely opposite to me and 3) the absolute trust in their discretion. They're pretty much non-judgmental lockboxes of blunt honesty once you've cracked their secret friendship code.

The more comprehensive answer is here.

It's generally more difficult for me to build strong bonds with Ti and Fe users (xxTPs and xxFJs) with the exception of ISTPs because regular communication requires more effort and common behaviors require more explanation. It's easier for me to have misunderstandings with xxFJs than any of the other MBTI types because what I meant and what they interpreted can be lost in translation: first come the assumptions, then the hurt feelings, then the emotional xxFJ dissertation length text messages™, and finally the awkward reconciliation. It's more difficult, but it's not impossible, and it's been a gap worth bridging to build some of the most valuable relationships in my life. [Related: What do you appreciate about the other types?]

[mr-entj]

Hi Mr-ENTJ, sorry for the long ask. This may seem like a very small issue, but I'm an INFP and I work in the service industry. My main problem is the entitlement in my workplace. I'm working for a corporate organization and, as corporate is, it's full of entitled, rich assholes to the people "below" them. There are policies in place to ensure efficiency and independence so that my clients don't do everything through me, but with my clients expecting anything and everything, I feel like it's my job to enforce the policies and educate them to become independent of having me do everything for them.

I've brought these problems to my supervisor and manager before, informing them that these policies are not respected, the inefficiencies in what the process should be, what clients are doing instead of going back to their actual resources, and suggestions/feedback/constructive criticisms to improve all of these things. My supervisor and manager are both ISFJs and they have worked in this department for over a decade, enough to say "it is what it is; this is what it means to be in service." My coworkers are not nearly as motivated to enforce the policies either because they see no change throughout all the years they've been here, or they don't care for this job enough.

I know that my job is service-oriented and there's something called going above and beyond, but I feel like there is nothing wrong with me educating my clients and i don't want to change what I feel is correct. I feel like another INFP on the team and I are the only ones who feels this passionately about these problems and want to improve it, but this burden is so tiresome and my team thinks it's annoying for me to police everything. I know that this job is no longer for me, and I'm working on finding something else, but until then, what else can I do?

I'm probably just looking for some validation and feedback on what I can do better, but am I wrong? Do I just need to let this go and let things be as they are? Am I just not doing enough? Am I not enforcing this properly?

You can have my validation that you're not wrong, you're probably right, but that still doesn't fix any of the problems you've outlined. Culture change comes in one of two ways if leadership isn't open to change:

The 'judger way' (xxFJ + xxTJ): Become a leader yourself and cascade the change downward -> This requires an immense amount of time to stick around and climb the promotional ladder

The 'perceiver way' (xxFP + xxTP): Get enough influential people to agree with you and override leadership -> This requires an immense amount of effort and may get you fired

Both options require power. Without power, you're stuck at the mercy of other people's decisions inside and outside of work.

This conflict is also a key reason why many INFPs are miserable in corporate environments because they need to adhere to systems and processes other people in power make. Without any motivation to climb the ladder, become a person of power, and change the systems/processes themselves-- INFPs get stuck as passengers in a car that someone else is driving. This is why you see a lot of INFPs opt for freelancing careers, academia, or completely opt out of work (stay-at-home parents) to maximize freedom.

Moving forward, you're correct to find a company that's a better culture fit. Until then, I wouldn't waste another single brain cell stressing about things and people that refuse to change. Save your time, energy, and emotions for the next role so you can hit the ground running.

Related answers:

Any advice for Fi-Dom leaders? Do you think they can be successful at leading people?

Help Mr. Entj, have you ever seen an INFP leader or manager in action? What observations do you have of their leadership style? Do you have any advice for improvement?

Have you worked with an INFP before? What's it like for you as an ENTJ?

MBTI and career choice

Can you give an idea of each MBTI type's career jump patterns or reasonings?

[mr-entj]

Mr. ENTJ. Do you have any advice for someone who is honest to the point it may hurt feelings and hurt my friendships? I refuse to bend the truth or my values but I find it can alienate the people around me because I am seen as too inflexible in my communication. If it helps, I am an INFP. Thank you!

I'll share with you something one of my mentors told me:

Honesty without compassion is cruelty.

Keep this at the forefront of your mind when communicating with other people.

[mr-entj]

Hello Mr. ENTJ,

I have read a few of your posts. And I must say, they are truly enlightening. Thank you for sharing your knowledge and passing on to others.

Would you have any advice on how ENFPs could develop/progress their tertiary Te? Any practical advice (all I see on the internet is theory. No irl use).

I have been struggling with this particular function for three years now. Some days I like how my progress is going. Some days I overuse it to the point of going into unhealthy loops, and on others I am clueless as to how I KNOW I am misusing Te, just don’t know what is specifically going wrong.

Alongside this question, how have your experience been with ENFPs and the function Te (dynamics, healthy and unhealthy individuals)? How did you perceive them? Were their actions/decisions befitting of tertiary Te?

As the daughter of an ENTJ 8w7, one of my goals is to become as logical and effective as half of what my dad is and has accomplished.

Another last question: do you know of any tips of how ENFPs and ENTJs can get along better? Me (ENFP 2w3) being too ‘soft/sensitive’ for the taste of my dad doesn’t help much. We can barely ever figure out what is going on inside each other’s heads. It’s as if it’s two apart worlds, and I’d risk to say I feel I have more in-common with my INTJ brother than with my ENTJ dad (come on, Te-Ni and Ni-Te shouldn’t be too different. Just thinking of my INFP pals, they’re lovely beings I feel I share a lot in-common with them. Flawed logic? Perhaps.)

If you can answer these, it’d be helpful. Coming from a successful, seemingly healthy ENTJ.

Thanks for supporting the blog.

Would you have any advice on how ENFPs could develop/progress their tertiary Te? Any practical advice (all I see on the internet is theory. No irl use).

To develop/progress Te, see this post.

Alongside this question, how have your experience been with ENFPs and the function Te (dynamics, healthy and unhealthy individuals)? How did you perceive them? Were their actions/decisions befitting of tertiary Te?

In the short bursts, strong and focused for things they're personally interested in. Very energetic, infectious, and productive.

In the long term, inconsistent and flaky with significant drop off after the fun phases are over (brainstorming, ideation) and it's time to actually do the difficult and not fun work (execution). The exact point this happens is a few days/hours after the execution phase starts and the excitement fades. This is when the wheels come off the wagon and things go to hell.

Another last question: do you know of any tips of how ENFPs and ENTJs can get along better?

For starters, I wouldn't make it a goal to change who you naturally are and how you operate simply because someone disagrees with it. Parent or not. Unless you're actively harming yourself, it's not a personality disorder or a problem to solve, it's just a personality quirk and a quality to accept.

Off the top of my head:

Set and enforce boundaries. ENTJs will step over lines they don't know exist because they assume that other types communicate as bluntly as they do. Spoiler alert: they don't. Make sure your dad knows they exist or else he'll trample over them unintentionally.

Identify what they're excellent at and learn from them. Pretty much every TJ I know is an expert in a particular field and can't shut up about it when asked. What's your dad's area of expertise? Learn more about it, ask him about it, and try it. This is a great starting place to bond.

Share only the problems you want solutions to. And if you don't want solutions, tell them up front. Most TJs (ENTJ, INTJ, ESTJ, ISTJ) will interpret sharing issues as asking for our input because we're natural problem solvers. Be clear that you're only looking to vent.

Acknowledge the facts, even if you don't agree with them. ENFPs are dreamers who go for moonshots (ambitious but unlikely goals). There's nothing wrong with dreaming big, but being too impractical and neglectful of reality can make you look delusional. This will annoy all TJs, not just the xNTJs. You can acknowledge the facts without killing your dreams. Work with your dad to brainstorm solutions to those problems, not to deny they exist. It's a good intellectual exercise and solid bonding opportunity.

Be considerate of their time. If you're not committed to acting on a plan, don't bother them for advice, and more advice, and more advice. Talking and talking and talking without any action is exhausting at best, and infuriating at worst. This is one of my main gripes with all perceivers especially when it comes to career coaching. They'll get excited about a plan, ask for my input, I'll invest time and energy into building it, and then they'll abandon it. In the long run, it'll damage your relationship with an ENTJ because you'll appear flaky and they'll respect you less because of it. A person's word is their bond, make sure your words hold a lot of weight.

[mr-entj]

It seems that ENTJs are ultra successful types and so, many descriptions and accounts are based off this idea. What do you think a middle-of-the-road, timid to act, or unsuccessful ENTJ would look like? How would you go about identifying them when they differ from the "norm"? Surely, there is such a thing… right?

There's so such thing as an ultra successful MBTI type, there are just personality types with specific traits, and people whose personalities fit the descriptions or don't fit them. The way people choose to use those traits to set goals, pursue happiness, and live their lives is up to them.

To answer your questions: A middle-of-the-road and timid to act ENTJ would look like one in an inferior Fi grip. An ENTJ that can't easily access, regularly use, and naturally wield their functions of their stack in the correct order (Te-Ni-Se-Fi) isn't an ENTJ. I don't buy the whole "I was in a grip for 10 years because of [trauma] but I'm really this other type." Your personality is who you are the majority of the time, it's the norm and not the exception.

The better question is: What is success? If it's money and career, then a lot of ENTJs I know would be labeled very successful because their qualities translate well in that space. If success is having many strong personal relationships and an expert handling of emotions, then a lot of ENTJs I know would not be labeled very successful. The difference is that society uplifts the first definition of success and not the second definition so it's important not to conflate traditional success as 'normal' and untraditional success as 'abnormal'.