Mark: Come on man! You never want to do anything since you and Meredith separated.
Derek: That’s not true! I wanted to wear my bathrobe and eat peanut clusters all day.
Derek: I wanted to start drinking in the morning.
Derek: Don’t say that I don’t have goals!
A scenario of the Mukamis going to McDonalds for the first time
“No, Kou. Listen to me. We’re not going to try out McDonald’s for the first time just to eat… a burger named after you, of all things.”
“Jeez, Ruki-kun. How cruel! Today is the last day of the promotion! We have to go, otherwise we’ll miss out… Please? Don’t be such a stick in the mud. It'd mean a lot if I could go with my brothers~”
It had been a regular afternoon for the four brothers, long tapers of bright sunlight seeping through the obsidian-black curtains of their large windows as clear, sapphire blue skies stretched as far as the eye could see, not a single cloud in sight. The other two Mukami brothers simply sat in place on the ornate couches, watching the elder two go at it in a seemingly endless conversation over a fast-food chain known for its signature golden arches and billions of served patrons.
“Why’s it named after ya, anyway? Must taste like shit, then. Like hell I wanna eat that."
“Hey, that’s not true!" The idol defended. "Hmph, if only you guys would come to McDonald’s with me, then you’ll see it tastes like the best burger they’ve ever sold~ Just like all my albums, it'll be a hit.”
“Ah… Ruki… I think we should… do as Kou says. He seems so… excited.”
“If it’ll shut him up, then yeah, let’s go," the tallest one yielded. "I’m curious too what all this fuss is about.”
“Alright, fine. I refuse to visit such a lowly establishment, but every once in a while can’t hurt. Shall we go, then?”
“Yay! I knew we could count on you, Ruki-kun~ Let’s get going!!”
With that said, the Mukami brothers headed for the nearest McDonald’s. Stepping foot inside the fast-food restaurant, they waited several minutes in line before placing their orders. Thankfully for the youngest, there was a spicy version of the special Kou Mukami burger that featured chicken at unimaginable levels of hot, flavored goodness.
After speaking with the cashier, the four headed for a booth to sit at and wait patiently.
“Man, it’s been forever since we last ate outside the house." Yuma rested both arms on the table. "Heh. I thought I might never taste food other than Ruki-kun’s cooking for the rest of our lives.”
“Yuma… I think you’re… exaggerating," Azusa mumbled. "Sometimes Ruki… lets me cook. Fufu… I really enjoy my shichimi togarashi.”
“Ugh, not that again, Azusa-kun!" The blonde beamed at them. "Don’t worry, though! My burger will knock your socks off~”
“We’ll see about that, Kou. You know, I’m very capable of making burgers at home as well if this type of food is to your liking. We could even use healthier ingredients than whatever frozen and lifeless food this establishment prefers using. Oh, it looks like our order is here.”
A waitress promptly set down an order of four Kou Mukami burgers on the table. As they began eating, Kou immediately grimaced and Yuma coughed a bit, taken aback by the taste.
“Hey!! This is super spicy…" Kou whined. "This can’t be my burger!”
“Ha, I knew it! Tastes like shit, just like I thought.”
“You take that back right now, you jerk!" The idol shouted. "Hmph, this must be some kind of mistake!”
“Oi, settle down you two! You are not fighting in this restaurant, I forbid it," Ruki scolded in a harsh tone. "Both of you should know better than to act like a bunch of morons, especially in public. Are you absolutely certain they’re not supposed to be spicy, Kou?”
“Absolutely positive!”
“Well, perhaps we can request a discount on the next meal to make up for this mishap. Or we could not come here at all in the future," a faint smile crept on Ruki's lips. "If you ask me, I prefer the latter.”
“Hey, Ruki… My burger… doesn’t taste spicy… at all. I was… really looking forward to it...”
"Okay, that's it. I'm going to have a chat with their upper management about this," said Ruki as he got up from his seat. "I'll be right back."
"Wow, Ruki-kun, Yuma and I complain but the moment Azusa is displeased, you finally take action," the blonde complained. "What am I, a roach?"
"Yeah, yeah," the tallest chimed in, "whatever."
As Ruki walked up to the counter again, he greeted the cashier with a slam of his splayed hand against the marble surface.
"Excuse me. It seems your staff has gotten our orders mixed up. We'd like a refund as well as what we originally paid for. Make it quick, too. My brothers are the rowdy type and we don't have all day to spend in this shoddy place. While you're at it, tell your cooks that the chicken was too dry and the dressing was practically nonexistent. Oh, and don't get me started on the bread. It tasted like cardboard in my mouth. How deplorable."
"Sir, this is a McDonald’s—"
Dissatisfied with the employee's attitude, Ruki snatched her wrist and brought it to his mouth, fangs threatening to prick at the veins.
"Just give us our original order like I asked, and things won't end ugly for you. Understood? Do hurry up. I’ve seen servants from the aristocracy work faster than you lot."
"A-Alright! Got it! Four orders of the Kou Mukami burger, coming right up!" The poor worker scurried away in a frenzy.
When the four brothers finally got what they asked for, Kou rejoiced at the taste of the burger named after him while Yuma and Azusa simply ate with pleased smiles on their faces. Ruki, on the other hand, just couldn't wait to get out of the McDonald's once and for all.
