Sometimes, I love being a Watcher. I know that I'm not mortal, not human, something far beyond that. I have power they don't. I'm inherently more, and it feels good.
And sometimes, I hate it.
I instigate. I push buttons. I clash with my sibling, and I refuse to back down. Why should I? She's hardly more than a fledgeling. Emotions fuel me, and she feels so many of them so strongly. I always feel bad afterwards, because she's my younger sister and I love her, but it's hard to step away.
I want to cause problems. To make others cautious, wary of their surroundings and of each other. I want them to mistrust everyone and put their faith in me. I want chaos, I want anger and fear and substance.
And I feel bad, because they're my friends and I care so, so deeply for them.
And yet, it's not always a bad thing. I push when others are upset because their masks of annoyance and anger don't deter me, I can see the hurt behind it. Them lashing out doesn't hide it. Eventually, it gives. And I can comfort them once it does.
I can take the energy and excitement of a group and direct it. I run games, and manage them easily because I live for it.
I am a Watcher, I feed off emotions, and it isn't always bad. I can channel that urge for kindness.
Sometimes.