Discover Top Posts Tagged with #momma turtle

The Lady of the Swamp has laid her eggs!

She so purdy

Made my Friday.

This is at the lab, right outside processing. Little does she know she now has 20+ babysitters. 🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢

Mom: What are you watching?

Me: TMNT

Mom: That didn’t look like TMNT

Me: That was Casey *points at the hockey sticks*

Mom: Really?

Me: Ya, in the cartoon he painted the mask up to look more skull like,

Mom: Ooooooh ok, that’s what threw me.

My mom expression was like “I know my man, and that ain’t him” XD. Ya my mom had the mega hots for Casey in the 90′s movies

If a guy ever tells you to swallow, don't. It's gross and I don't recommend it.

Momma Turtle

Mouthwash is just kids practicing for when they turn 21. Everyone knows how to take a shot.

Momma Turtle

Your mother has an airbag on her ankle and you're laughing at her. How rude.

Momma Turtle

I can't do anything because I'm hungover and helpless

Momma Turtle

I started laughing and I peed on her deck. I think I was either too drunk or I am getting too old.

Momma Turtle

Momma Turtle everyone.

#momma turtle