#moosekateer13

[holylulusworld]

[moosekateer13]

My Regin Ends

Part 3 of You're Losing Me mini series

Warnings:  Angst, Mention of Breakup, Cyberbullying, Harassment,  Self Loathing, Medical Issues, Alcoholism, Death

Summary: After visiting her daughter who shut down her attempts to reconnect with her. Now Y/N's only has a bottle as her company. As her time runs out. She reflects on all her mistakes that led to her being alone.

Inspired by Taylor Swift's Castle's Crumbling Down

My foes and friends watch my reign end. I don't know how it could've ended this way. Smoke billows from my ships in the harbor. People look at me like I'm a monster. Now they're screaming at the palace front gates, used to chant my name.

Now they're screaming that they hate me. Never wanted you to hate me.

Oh how far I've fallen from royalty in the media industry to someone when people don't give a damn about. I'm here sitting in my mansion wearing a worn blue dress. It's the dress I wore when I pushed away the love of my life. I didn't see what was right in front of me. It's something I've been regretting recently. I stare at the coal-black walls reflecting on my life. It feels like I’m drawing in a pit of self-loathing. This place hasn't felt like home in a long time; it's just somewhere to lie down.  

The limelight wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

I started off as a young child star. I got caught up in the glamour of the limelight. I couldn't see the damage it was doing to those around me.

My boyfriend Jared broke up with me. I don't blame him. I was never home and never really looked after our daughter. Delia she hates me and she considers someone else mom. Well, I don't blame her Genevive raised her with Jared. Like an idiot, I signed my rights away and chose fame instead. I've got a grandchild on the way but they'll never call me grandma even if I was still around to see them grow. Jared's wife earned that title. I know I don't deserve it. It's good to see Delia is thriving though. She is a successful artist in both music and painting.  I'm proud of her. Thanks to her upbringing she is the complete opposite of me. I'm just washed up.

After getting trapped in the stereotypical role of heiress. I started to internalize that they were rich, entitled and spoiled. Unlike them, I didn't have any money to fall back on. So I sought comfort in the bottle and have remained in a drunken haze since. If I'm not drinking I'm caught up in an endless amount of flings.

All the stuff I've done to myself caught up with me. I have heart ischemia and don't have long left. Hence why I tried to make amends with all the people that I'd done wrong.  But as usual, I was pushed aside and locked out. What goes around comes around as the old saying goes. 

When I was diagnosed with heart issues. I also found out I had a rare condition called Alice in Wonderland Syndrome. According to the doctor I have had it since I was in my 20s. Since it was left untreated my perception of the world got worse.  The syndrome itself impairs my brain's processing of sensory input. The disruption alters my perception of the size of objects and my own body's feel or appearance. It can also warp my perception of reality. Ding, Ding yup that sure sounds like me I thought to myself when I was first diagnosed. 

I think back to when I was forced into fame by my father as a child. He never cared about my well-being, just saw the dollar signs.

I remember one particular day when I had a fever and he still forced me to work when I was a teenager.

“Come on Y/N you aren't sick. You just don't want to work. Now get your lazy ass into wardrobe.” Dad said

I tried to get more words out but I knew he wouldn't listen so I headed back to wardrobe.  My mom died during childbirth so he's been punishing me for just living. Well, it feels like it anyway. I hope one day I can be a good parent.”

The apple didn't fall from the tree and I ended up not being a good parent.

My head is pounding. I can't think anymore. All I keep hearing is the mob outside my mansion screaming that they hate me. It's been constant for years now and the police stopped coming.  Also, no security company wants to work for me. My reputation for treating people like shit caught up with me. I was never nice to my coworkers and just pushed them away when they tried to talk to me after work. Well, when I had a job anyway. I haven't worked in years.

Who would want to hire me anyway? I'm a mess. I get up to get some pain relief for my headache but I don't make it. I feel the world go black.

My castle's crumbling down And I watch all my bridges burn to the ground And you don't want to know me I will just let you down (just let you down) My castle's crumbling down You don't wanna know me now

Narrator P.O.V

I turn up the TV to hear the latest breaking news. 

Local Texas news reporter Genevive Padalecki was there to report the death of former Y/N Y/L /N. It looks like her medical issues or the bottle caught up to her. Maybe it's sad how far she's fallen. No one was there in her final moments. Well maybe if she treated people better she wouldn't have been all alone. We will bring you more information as it becomes available.

As an online news reporter. I want to check on the latest scoop. So I  decided to look online. There are no kind messages about her. I notice no RIP on social media. They just said she got what's coming to her. It's sad really but she stirred up all the hatred with the way she treated people. I close the tab on the page not wanting to read anymore.

[negans-lucille-tblr]

It breaks my heart see such a talented writer taking down her work on Tumblr. You've been one of my biggest inspirations on here. Your inspiration has taken me down a more adventurous road with my writing.

I just thought I'd write down here one of the dreams I had recently that hopefully will make you smile a bit. You were a well established writer and I was at one of your signings. Jared and I were married. We were the last ones in line. I told him not to follow me into the store because everyone would see him a mile away. Of course he disobeyeded and was handy the entire time. You found it very entertaining. Eventually Jared gave you business card so you could be the next guest at our book club.

All in all though I hope you keep writing in some capacity. Also if you ever publish any books in the future. I'd happily scoop it up and buy it.

Wishing you all the best.

Thank you Jen. I’ve always loved your comments and love on my work (not to mention the gifs) ❤️

[cockslutpadalecki]

all of my holes are quivering and ready to be annihilated 🥴

[queen-of-deans-booty]

missed you!

[percywinchester27]

Hey, Darling!

Firstly, I am awfully sorry for the late reply. I've had to go on an impromptu hiatus. Trying to get back in line now.

Secondly, thank you so much for the GIFs :) They made me smile. I mean who wouldn't smile after seeing our boys being all boyish and murder-y, right?

However, I am not sure whether you wanted me to write a GIF blurb with them. If so, could you please submit them as three individual submissions, (I'll add a link below) instead of an ask?

In an ask (especially if they are all together) I can't write for them. And my connection is so crappy that a lot of times I can't upload GIFs in a different text post once downloaded. Submitted GIFs come as a post by themselves.

But in case you were just being a sweetheart and sending it to make my day, that TOTALLY worked ;)

Hope you have a wonderful day!

Submit a GIF

[writercole]

Soulless Sam....Demon Dean...and Daddy in glasses.

If I wasn't dehydrated before, I sure as hell am now!

[saxxxology]

my god