Coloratura
-IronStrange drabble set in my Stars Crossed AU; 1428 words-
Fluff, angst, unrequited love, pining, mutual pining, hurt/comfort, humor
Strange sighed deeply, and his brow furrowed. No matter how often he donned this look, it never failed to amuse Tony, and transfix him. He met Strange's sharp gaze, the corners of his lips curling imperceptibly into a lazy smile. The sun was beaming through his cheap curtains, softening the light into a hazy glow. It all made him feel at peace. He couldn't imagine wanting to be anywhere else. The bed was plush, he was warm, and the weight of his and Stephen's bodies on the mattress made it dip, bringing them closer together at the center where it was all the easier to stare into his eyes. He had such beautiful eyes.
How did they twinkle like that, the light warming deep shades of purple into dusky violet tones? It was like watching the sunset through his irises, tranquil and longing. And yet, he kept that look, regarding Tony with that quizzical intensity. Tony suppressed a laugh.
"There it is." Strange murmured, his gaze softening to its usual weary state.
"What?" Tony murmured. His words were thick with the beginnings of sleep. "Why do you always look at me like that?"
Strange huffed, rolling onto his side to face Tony. He reached out, and the engineer's breach hitched, watching his hand move. But it didn't land on him. Instead it waved lazily above him gesturing to the area above his head.
"Your color. Your aura."
Unbidden, a doubtful smile poured across Tony's face. He couldn't help it, his cheeks ached with it, so wide and genuine it was.
"My 'aura'?" He scoffed, though it tumbled into a bubbly chuckle.
Strange playfully swatted his arm.
"This isn't yoga class, Stark."
He was biting his lip, trying to stop his own smile. It made his face look stretched, because he smiled anyways, one corner of his lopsided grin pinched tight between his teeth. Tony cackled.
"Quit it!" Strange failed to scold him through his own rising laughter. "I'm serious!"
At last Tony burst with unbridled giggles, his hands flying to hide his face like a tittering school girl. He snorted, and then laughed harder, because he'd always thought it was hilarious when he snorted how his mother did.
His eyes were screwed shut with tears beneath them, he felt but did not see Strange bump his head into his shoulder, shaking with quiet laughter.
"I'm s-serious!" Strange giggled against him, warming Tony with each pant and gasp to catch his breath.
For a while, nothing was said, there were only two lumps of quivering, laughing warmth pressed close against one another. They would begin to calm, then one of them would make a strangled little noise, trying to reign themselves in, and it would set them laughing anew, their sense of humor shot in the way that's typical for a sudden on-set case of the giggles.
Tony didn't know when it happened, but Strange's hand was on his chest, fingers curled tight in the fabric of his band tee while his head rested in the crook of his shoulder, rocking Tony gently with every full chested chuckle. The sun was warm and golden, painting the bed with unheard of colors only they could see. They slowly came down from their high, plateauing when they'd reached a sense of simple euphoria, and could bask in the light as though it were bliss. Tony fell quiet first, listening to the music of Strange's fading laughter.
By full golden hour, they were silent, drowsy with contentment and drunk on the day's last light. Tony felt how his lungs filled with every slow breath, pushing his ribs up, making room for the quiet needs within him, before he exhaled, letting go of something intangible, but dark. For now, he was weightless, bobbing gently on tranquil seas, anchored only by the man beside him, whose own gentle breaths served as the waves Tony surfed, guiding until they were in sync.
Tony allowed himself one action, one choice to be made without consulting the storm of thoughts in his head, for now at bay. Lifting his head, he lay it against Stephen's. The sorcerer responded with an amiable hum, nestling himself beside Tony.
It felt bothersome to break the silence, but Tony spoke nonetheless, keeping his voice at a honey soaked murmur.
"Go on then, Oz. My aura?"
He smirked, and Strange scoffed against him, the both of them too tired to laugh further. It was quiet, Tony considering each vein and tendon on Strange's unmarred hands as one drifted across his stomach, tapping at his left side.
"Right here, is your appendix." His finger drew a lazy circle on Tony's belly. "In this universe, it doesn't really do much, unless it's inflamed. But in my universe, it releases chemicals, pheromones, that show me how people feel. I can see them like clouds of color."
He lifted his hand to pantomime his words. Tony already missed the warmth.
"Usually they're very distinct depending on the emotion. You know the saying, "trust your gut"? it's because you have a physical reaction to the release of the chemicals; the appendix makes your intestines shift."
Now he patted Tony's stomach gently, his hand lingering once again.
"That doesn't happen in your universe. Maybe it used to, but now you only get those chemicals from your brain, which releases a lot less. You have to feel them pretty strongly for me to sniff them out."
He shifted, lifting his head and forcing Tony to lift his. Once more he stared into his eyes.
"You're especially hard to read. You disguise your emotions on purpose, and try to feel as little as possible." He lowered his gaze, voice softening. "When it's quiet, I can see you. When you let yourself feel, your aura turns bright pink."
"The color of hatred?" Tony murmured sarcastically.
Strange didn't react to this.
"The color of pure affection, and loyalty." He replied softly. "Brighter than every other emotion you feel, every time."
The sun was dropping lower in the sky, and the direct light had left the room. Purple shadow chased away the golden glow, and with it came a tangible horizon to their moment, an inevitable place where the sun would set on them. There were only five words needed to cement it.
"You remind me of him."
Tony felt the cozy glow fade, his heart beat slowing. Strange was still facing him, but now it seemed that he was looking through him, beyond him to where he really belonged, and to whom he belonged.
"The me from your universe." Tony clarified, his voice a dull mumble, like it was too much effort to fully spit the words out.
Strange nodded almost imperceptibly. He rolled on his back, staring up at the blank ceiling. The gap between them was now a little wider. He already seemed an ocean away to Tony. The urge to reach out, to take Stephen's hand and pull him close again, was strong. The knowledge that he would never be Him, the Tony that Strange came here trying to find....that was stronger, and it weighed on his chest, keeping him pinned in place.
"Was he brighter?" Tony asked instead. The venom in his words was lost in the fragility of them.
Strange's brow wrinkled in confusion, then smoothed out when understanding took over.
"He was like a painting. So bright it lit the future. So warm it...melted our wings."
He tilted his head, searching the ceiling with intense concern. Tony had the feeling he was staring at Strange the same way. Of course, he quickly averted his gaze when the sorcerer turned to face him again.
"You're nothing like him." He said, his tone odd and flat.
Tony kept his face blank, trying to swallow down the lump in his throat without being obvious.
"It's one of my favorite things about you." Strange added. "You both shine the same color, but I know when we speak that it's not the same man I fell in love with."
Tony felt cold suddenly. The mattress sprang up, no longer burdened by two bodies. A voice whispered from the emptiness around him.
"This is a new love all its own..."
Tony lay in the dull blue of dusk, alone in his room. The wind was cold now, billowing the curtains and seeping into him. He didn't bother with the covers. Instead, he rolled over into the little divot left behind by his nightly visitor. The sheets were warm, but with every moment he lay there, the warmth began to fade…
(Hi!! This fic is part of my Stars Crossed AU. The Stephen Strange here is from a multiverse where he grew up rich, but hidden away by his family for the magical abilities he'd possessed since childhood. Tony Stark grew up poor, with a genetic heart issue. The two meet in college, eventually fall hard for one another, and run off to build a life together. Years in the future, Tony is targeted by SHIELD for his experiments, and things fall apart when SHIELD takes a prototype that nearly shatters their universe, sending people, places, objects, hurtling into different dimensions. Despite his best effort to keep the world together, Strange is ejected into the voids between universes, where he spends years trying to piece things back together, to restore his world and find his husband. He turns to darker magics, absorbing other entities to gain enough power to find and anchor his world, becoming Strange Supreme. Eventually he gets a signal, a timeline signature that is almost exactly Tony's. Except, when he gets there, it's not his Tony. In this universe, Howard Stark was a renowned inventor, Tony grew up with wealth and built the arc reactor out of desperation to survive, not to manage a genetic heart condition. Things get tangled up as this new Tony begins to fall for Strange, who can't leave this universe without accidentally severing the connection to his home, which might not even be salvagable anymore. Together they have to face the unknown of themselves, each other, and the whole universe, all while Tony bites back the growing love he has for a married man.) Sorry this is long lol, but im sure someone is happy about it. Might put this on a03 later i dunno.