#muppetverse

[gleepglorp-tallyhall]

Wonder how the Muppet joker is doing. Haven't seen anything from him since Kermit was chasing him over the dangerous chemical vats or some shit like that

[therealjimmycondommilwaukee]

#Welcome, #viewers, #listeners, and #sentientmoldpatches, to the first #installment of Jimmy Condom’s #Croakerverseinterviews! Today, I am joined by @marsha-landlord, also known as Marsha Brown!

Before we get into the #interview, would you like to #introduce yourself to the audience, Marsha?

M: No. If the viewers do not know who I am they will have to find out on their own. They can find my blog at @marsha-landlord.

Marsha, I have mentioned your #blog!

M: Okay.

Oh! Um… well! I suppose that that’s a #valid #response. But without further ado, let’s get into the meat of the #interview with our first #question!

Marsha, what was your childhood like?

M: I was born in 1969 to my mother Gertrude and father Delbert. I have got six siblings. It would be seven, had my sister not perished in the flood.

I attended Catholic Schools for most of my childhood. I admired the Nuns that taught there. I had my heart set on becoming a Nun, however once I turned 14 things took a drastic turn when my father was exposed to mass amounts of radiation and all of his skin melted off. As a result my mother became the sole breadwinner of our household, and as the eldest daughter it was only proper that I left school to take on the role of caring for my siblings.

That’s rough, Marsha. I’m sorry you had to go through #that. I have my own experiences with #familial and specifically #sibling-based #trauma, so I can empathize with you.

Now that we a have a good idea of where you started, Marsha, how did you get from there to where you are now? More specifically, what inspired you to pursue a career in #landlording?

M: I was born with the deeds to the apartment building in my hands. These were kept safe for me until I became of age, at which point I moved there. I lived there for decades, treating each apartment as if it were one room of my very large house.

Then when my husband and I had Harold Junior., it was nonsensical to remain in the apartment building. All of those stairs with a young child would prove dangerous. So we instead purchased a modest little property with seven bedrooms, six bathrooms, two dining rooms and three living rooms. It was not much but it was enough for us.

Harold thought that I gave up the apartment building, but instead I began to rent it out in order to make a little extra money because back in those days the wife was merely considered to be the homemaker and should not have a job. These days, I would not say that Landlordism is my true calling but I enjoy it nonetheless.

#Fascinating! I’m sure our audience will appreciate that window into your life #in-the-now!

Speaking of #in-the-now, as of late, you’ve made posts pertaining to a… #certain #someone. Your beloved #bestie-turned-boo, Ingrid (@ingrid-francis)! How have things been going with her?

M: Very well. We have got another date night coming up this weekend, for which I am taking her to the theater.. I am not sure if you will have heard of it but we will be seeing a local showing of "Hamilton". Ingrid is a history aficionado so I am sure she will enjoy it.

I’ve heard good things about that show! We at #WISNTVNews once received an offer from a #Hamilton fan who was an #AIDS #activist, though, on reply, we never heard back from them.

Shifting the spotlight back to you though, Marsha, how has this process of #discovery regarding your #sexuality been, at your advanced age?

M: I have been having complex feelings surrounding the topic. I married young, and for the majority of my life Harold was the only person I had been with. Upon meeting Ingrid at our book club, however, something shifted within me. It has been a challenge but with the help of my daughter, Amanda (@mandythegreat) , I have been able to accept this part of myself, at least somewhat.

…Somewhat, Marsha? Is there something you've been #struggling #with in regards to your #feelings? If you don't want to #go #into #it, you don't have to, and we can cut this part.

M: In a way. I have done some thinking and I have realised I feel a large amount of guilt surrounding my deceased husband, Harold (may he rest in peace). I feel as though I have betrayed him by moving on at all, let alone moving on with another woman. Deep down, I know that there is nothing wrong with being a woman who likes women, but my daughter says that it sounds as if I am struggling with what she calls “Internalized Homophobia” and that I have much work to do in order to fully accept myself as I am.

I’m glad you can display that sort of kindness to yourself, Marsha! Not everyone can manage that. I truly hope that, someday, you’ll be able to #vanquish your #internalized #homophobia. It’s a long process, but I believe in you!

On the topic of #lovers, though, you mentioned Harold Junior before—#Harry (@harry-the-worst). Our reporters in the interweb fields report that he and his girlfriend, #Danni (@gothiccdanni), have a bit of a… troubled relationship. Do you have anything to say on #that #matter, Marsha?

M: If I am being honest, I do not know a lot about their relationship. Amanda has confided in me about some things that she says have been going on with the two of them but I do not know how accurate that is. A lot of the time I do not trust Amanda's judgement.

That’s understandable. Children don’t always want to share details of their lives with their parents, and that’s okay! They’re deserving of #respect and #privacy just as much as their #parents, both in adulthood and in their earlier years. If only my own #parents could’ve imbibed that #lesson… but anyway! What does the average #day #in #your #life look like, Marsha?

M: I enjoy going to my book club and tending to my house plants. I also do yoga sometimes. It is a good way to release emotions. Sometimes I find myself screaming while I am in Downward Dog.

#Yoga? That’s very heartwarming! I hear that it is not only a good way to #vent emotions, as you have said here, but that it also comes with a variety of #health #benefits. For someone like you, who’s had such a drastic #diet shift in the last two months—from a life of #Veganism to a more carnivorous palate—I imagine that #yoga’s nothing but helpful. How has your health been, since that dietary change?

M: I am incredibly bloated.

“Bloated?” Not to #offend, Marsha, but that seems like a bit of a harsh word. Have you been experiencing any #dissatisfaction with your larger body?

M: Not at all. I am as happy with my body type as I have always been. Women are taught to dislike their bodies but I refuse to. This is the same body that has carried me through my 56 years of life and I hope it will last for a further 56.

Inspiring, Marsha! I hope that all of the young women watching can follow in your #body #positivity footsteps.

As we reach the end of this #interview, I’d like to return to your occupation, if that’s alright. What’re in the #penthouse and #asbestos #basement? Viewers have been #dying to know since the May 6 poll ended in a standstill.

M: The asbestos basement contains asbestos. I am not sure why this confuses people when it is explained in the name. The penthouse is private and I will not be discussing it as of right now.

That’s entirely understandable. We all have our #secrets!

For our final question, Marsha, we’ve got a bit of a #curveball for you. A hypothetical, if you’d be willing to entertain it.

If all of your present tenants were in a #Saw #trap and you could only #save #one, who would you save?

M: If I were forced to save someone, I would choose Kermit (@the-muppet-joker). We have had our differences in the past but he is now my "Homestuck Moirail" so I feel obliged. Plus Tenant Eight (@tenant-eight) is already a corpse so it would not matter if I were to save it and Scarlet (@scarlet-worms) is worms so she is able to regenerate on her own.

A strong #platonic friendship never fails to #move #the #soul! Furthermore, the resilience of this “Tenant Eight” and Scarlet is truly heartening, even if I don’t fully grasp the metaphors you’re using. That being said, I think this is a wonderful note to end this #interview on. Is there anything you’d like to say to our viewers before we conclude, Marsha?

M: No.

Oh! A-Alrighty, then! Have a wonderful rest of your day, Marsha! The spatial distortion portal is behind the door on your left.

M: Thank you, Mr. Condom.

And thank you, dear viewers, for tuning in for the first installment of my #croakerverseinterviews! My next interviewee is #to #be #announced, but if you would like to be the first to know, make sure to sign up for my #newsletter!

This has been Jimmy Condom, #WISNTVNews, signing off.

[that-rand0m-pers0n]

We’re not your average💃💃🕺🕺ordinary people💃💃🕺🕺🕺

Gulp a wee quick sketch but OUUGGGHHH HEIDIIIII

Watched meet the feebles yesterday…oh my goodness..☹️☹️😰😰

OOOHH MY POOR HEIDI☹️☹️☹️aw she makes me so sad she didn’t deserve any of that at all im so glad she got rehabilitated ☹️awww nooo bletch when i get YOU⚔️⚔️⚔️he absolutely deserved what he got such a sick man

The whole harry situation genuinely had me gagging AND THE LAST SCENE WITH HIM IN THE CARRIT dear godit was sick(literally 😓) but the convo with the doctor had me chuckling

Aw Robert was so silly I love his voice I’m absolutely drawing him and lucielle next they’re so cute IM SO GLAD THEY DIDNT GET SHOT OMG had me holding my breathe when lucielle was on the stage

OH AND SIDS KID omg i was abt to burst out in tears i genuinely thought he was gonna get killed like his mum☹️sweet little sid baby💔

I love the fact that this whole movie is canon in the muppet verse I’m absolutely drawing miss piggy+kermit getting served by Heidi in the store it would be so cute(and to get over this whole emotion roller coaster of a movie)

BLOODY TREVOR oh nah I hate that guy SO much he’s such a bitch I can’t even form the words omg

Anyways yay meet the feebles content🩷just a…few years late to it!!!(COUGH 36 years COUGGGHHHH)

[muppet-meddler]

Week Of July 27th-August 2nd: The End Of The Roommate Saga

(The Exact Days Of This Week Strange Due To The Timing Of The Start Of This Blog.)

Hello Everyone. This Is The First Post Recounting The Events Of This Week, And Hopefully I Will Make This A Regular Occurrence, Although It Will Likely Only Follow Major Events In The Muppetverse Timeline.

To Start, I Would Like To Say that This Blog Is Not Purely An Archive Blog, And There Are Many Incredible Blogs Currently Providing Archival Content Of The Antics Within This Community.

I Simply Wish To Provide Supplemental Information, Particularly In A Sequential And Specific Manner So As To Help Them With Their Blogs, And for You To Keep Up With And Remind Yourself Of Current Events.

While I May Cover Past Chapters In This Story In The Future, Here Are Some Blogs And Resources I Recommend Highly.

@croaker-conspiracies And Their Masterpost

@themuppetarchives

@the-muppet-joker-archive (Currently Inactive)

@croaker-explained And Their Kermiad

In Addition, This Is A Living Document. I May Add Links To Particular Posts Of Importance Related To The Roommate Saga As I See Fit.

This Post Is Also An Invitation For Discussion And Addition From The Public In The Notes And Replies.

Now, Without Further Ado:

This Week Saw The Climactic End To What I Will Refer To As The “Roommate Saga”.

July 27th-28th

Tensions Were High Within The Apartment Containing Milton, Kermit, Athena, And Sage. The Hierarchy Was Precarious, With Kermit, Sage, And Milton Battling For Blanket Rights (There Were Only Two Blankets In The Apartment. Many Anons Had Been Trying To Trick Milton Into Breaking Rules, Such As Cooking Italian Food/Food Containing Garlic.

Milton’s Mental State Was Becoming Increasingly Unstable, Ascribing His Frequent Misspellings To Typing Quickly While Panicked And Being Unable To See The Keyboard Clearly While Crying. This Is Similar To Common Vent Post "Crytype" Typing Styles During Early 2010s Tumblr.

Milton Claimed That He And Sage Had Met “In A Hospital”. It Was Later Revealed By Sage That They And Milton Are Siblings, And Milton Had Lied About Being An Orphan. 

Meanwhile, Croaker’s Kermit Plush Was Missing, And He Had Just Been Tricked Into Eating Flies Baked Into Cookies By Milton Under Athena’s Orders. Increasingly Disturbed By These Events, He Ventured To The Closet To Investigate The “Meat Box” Contained Within. This Is Also Referred To As “The Rot”. The Discovery Is Shocking And Disturbing, And Later Revealed To Be An Animal Trap Containing The Maggot Infested Carcass Of A Heavily Decomposed Animal. Athena, Milton, And Sage Consumed The Flies And Maggots In A Ritual Initially Referred To As A “Roommate Bonding Activity” On The Croaker’s Blog, Claiming To Be Building Up Energy For Athena To Channel The Spirit Of Gerard Way.

After Discovering The Rot, Croaker Panicked And Began Looking For An Opportunity To Move Back In With His Mother.

It Is Revealed That Croaker’s Plush, Eyeless Since The Events Preceding The Denny’s Battle, Referred To By Milton And Athena As “The Proxy”, Had Been Kept In A Bag In The Closet And Subsequently Consumed By The Rot.

Croaker Discovers That Milton Had Stolen The Kermit Plush Under Athena’s Orders, And Discovers Its Rot-Consumed State.

Sage Confronts Milton About Lying About His Family And Past. Through Their Interactions, It Could Be Gleaned That They Had Been Raised In A Fundamentalist Christian Cult/High Control Group, Particularly The Church Of God With Signs Following. This Group, Stemming Predominantly From Appalachia, Was Known For Its Use Of Handling Venomous Snakes And Drinking Poison To Prove The Power And Saving Grace Of God. Sage Seems To Have Left The Church, While Milton Had Been Disowned For “Not Being Faithful Enough”.

It Is Revealed That The Apartment Has Been Infested With Black Mold, And Is Highly Implied To Have Carbon Monoxide Alarms Actively Going Off.

Croaker Posts In An Increasingly Panicked Fashion, Including This Post Which Strongly Resembles The Parody Lyrics Of “You Can’t Fight The Homestuck” By Kylee Henke In 2012.

Croaker Becomes Murderous, Leaving The Apartment To Craft A Wooden Stake To Kill Athena, Known Vampire.

Athena Leaves To A Graveyard To Further Prepare Herself For Her Ritual.

Sage Posts Increasing Amounts Of Dog Imagery, Referring To Itself As Athena’s Dog.

July 29th

Milton Begins Seeing Things In Their Peripheral Vision, And Becomes More Unstable Than Before.

Sage Reveals That She Left Home Because Milton Was The Favorite Child. Milton Reveals That He Was Disowned Because He Stopped Being Able To Heal, Wasn’t Able To Be Protected From The Poison, And Was Blamed For Sage’s Leaving. They Claim That This Is Due To Them Being A Sinner.

Milton Confirms That They Were Raised Pentecostal.

Anons Drive Milton Into A Religious Meltdown.

Milton Reveals That He Was Drinking Strychnine, A Highly Toxic Pesticide.

Milton Goes To Sleep. Meanwhile, Croaker Begins To Hunt Athena With A Stake, And Athena Is At The Peak Of Her Fanaticism Regarding Channeling Gerard Way By Power Of The Rot.

Athena Calls For Sage To Become Her First “Vampiric Spawn”, And For Herself And Sage To Burn The Rot Infested Kermit Plush. Croaker Is Devastated By The Loss, And “Lightly” Stabs Athena With The Previously Sharpened Wooden Stake.

Sage Tasks Themself With Caring For Athena, Now Wounded, And Takes Her To The Hospital. Croaker Frantically Collects Her Things To Move Out, Tripping Over Sleeping Milton In The Process. After A “Monologued Tragic Backstory” From Milton, Croaker Decides To Spare Him And Take Him Back To His Mother’s House, Now As Friends. 

Milton Reveals Having Spoken To A Man In A Blue Jacket While Sleeping In The Closet. After Sage Posts A Picture Of The Jacket Hanging Unworn, It Can Be Assumed That This Was A Hallucination.

Croaker’s Mother Was Initially Against Housing A Guest, But After Much “Stomping And Shrieking”, She Is Convinced.

Milton Struggles With Newfound Independence, But Is Otherwise Settling In Nicely.

Sage Is Barraged With Anons Confronting Him For His Treatment Of Milton. Sage Appears To Be Sent Into A Meltdown Because Of This.

July 30th-August 1st

The Brotherhood Appears To Be Overjoyed By The Addition Of Milton To The Movement. This Creates A Surge Of Posts, Questions, And Fanart. Unfortunately, He Also Receives A Barrage Of Haters And Trolls, Some Of Which Particularly Triggering And Concerning.

Sage And Athena Receive An Eviction Notice Due To The Unsafe State Of The Apartment And Complaints From Their Neighbor, Robert. Athena’s Connection To Gerard Appears To Be Severed.

Croaker Holds A Funeral For His Kermit Plush On July 31st, At 2:00 PM EST. The Brotherhood Offers Art, Words Of Remembrance And Sympathy, And Howls Of Grief In His Honor.

Milton Speaks Of A Surprise For Croaker, And Later Reveals That He Had Walked Several Hours Back To The Apartment To Collect Kermit’s Ashes.

There Is An Unprecedented Uptick In Croaker Discord Activity As A Whole During This Time. 

The Original Server (Made On Father’s Day Of This Year) Welcomed Milton Among Many New Brotherhood Members. The Croaker Herself Has Been Present Here For Some Time. Milton And Croaker Are Observed To Be Typing And Sending Messages Within The Same Minute, Providing Evidence That They Are Two Separate People. 

User Unmask-Strange-Aeons Created Their Own Server Inviting All To Join To Further Their Efforts In Proving That Popular Tumblr User Strange-Aeons Is In Fact The Muppet Joker. The Croaker Himself Then Joined To Confront The Allegations Directly. However, This Particular Conspiracy Seems To Stand Strong Even Still.

A New Server Dedicated To All Fans, Followers, Haters, And Lurkers Of The Muppetverse Was Created, And Milton Posted An Invite.

Unmask-Strange-Aeons Gets Kung Pow Penis’d In Response To Their Heightened Activity And Creation Of The Discord Server.

The Brotherhood Falls Into A Much More Positive Buzz Of Energy, Interacting With Renewed Fervor In The Wake Of The Roommate Saga. New Theories, Conspiracies, And Communities Emerge.

Athena And Sage Fall Much More Quiet, Their Situation Uncertain In The Wake Of Eviction.

Milton Progressively Finds A Renewed Comfort In Enjoying Musicals, Music, And Fandoms Previously Banned Within The Confines Of The Emo Religion.

Strange-Aeons Vows To Battle The Croaker In The Ballpit Of Dashcon 2.

And So The Saga Continues.

[i-worship-alexander-thornton]

Here’s what we know about daddy Alexander’s mysterious liquid:

1. It comes out of an orifice

2. It is not a type of milk we would recognise

3. He dares not utter it

4. He was not jorking it; it was worse that him jorking it

5. He did not produce the liquid

6. Liquid was not supposed to be in that container (perhaps container was the tote bag?)

My theory?

It is Kermit’s cum.

Here is how this theory fits all the points.

1. Self explanatory; cum comes out of an orifice (the lovely penis)

2. ‘Not a type of milk we would recognise’ implies that it is a type of milk in a sense. Cum is sometimes depicted as white and creamy, much like milk

3. Daddy Alexander is a monk. It is understandable that he is not as comfortable talking about bodily fluids that are associated with the sin of lust

4. Daddy Alexander has expressed displeasure at being made to think about Kermit’s penis by asks. This could be why he claims idea of Kermit jorking it is worse, in his eyes, to the idea of him jorking it. Kermit’s penis has simply been on his mind so much that he finds himself compensating by going very far in the other direction, and to act so thoroughly disgusted by Kermit’s cum

5. Also self-explanatory; it was Kermit who created the liquid

6. Kermit has a history of cumming in/on things that he should not come in/on

Additional supporting evidence includes:

-daddy Alexander said he didn’t want to ‘escalate’ the situation, meaning he situation is already bad. We all know Kermit’s situation is.. well.

-there was mention from other monks who heard what I (and others) believe was Kermit breaking his vow of celibacy, and jorking it

[frobinish]

hi hello idk if weve rver talked before (if we have im very very oopsie my memory is absolutely gone rn) but what did your tag on my post about people needing to read my blog mean?

Hi Milton! I meant that people keep asking you the same questions over and over that you have already answered in posts on your blog. I apologize if that tag was confusing and/or harsh.

We haven’t talked in depth before, you’ve answered a lot of my asks but I don’t expect you to remember because I know you get a lot of them.

I hope you’re doing well! Have a good night! :-)

[fearandfelt]

Hear me out: Sage, Sara, and Emily team up

Drop an album or something

Start a coven

Do you see my vision

[cliione]

🚨canon muppetverse accounts dni🚨

i'm truly fascinated by milton from a character perspective. from the knowledge i have of the muppet joker cinematic universe, there is a possibility now that he is the one who killed bucephalus? like, correct me if i'm wrong of course, as i'm not caught up with the whole fruit cult storyline yet. love gordon so much, is he canon in the mjcu though? anyways, kermit was sent a message from what appears to be a milton impersonator account, claiming that he killed bucephalus. that's not the part that i thought was a little fishy though. what surprised me is the fact that milton refuses to answer the question as to whether or not he had any involvement in bucephalus' death. again, not concrete evidence by any means, but a Strange choice of words, included with him just getting back from experiencing *something* in the woods, his at the time strained relationship with kermit, as WELL as using cryptic hashtags in his answers regarding Bucephalus. he also had a conversation with someone in the comments of one of those asks saying that he would message the truth of what actually happened to them privately. tbh it reminds me of that time mod silver was the golden child of sonic for real justice's fandom, only to be revealed to be more manipulative and less delicate than they initially appeared to be.

i honestly looooove those kinds of characters in stories, the sleeper villains are the best in my humble opinion(even though it's technically unclear whether or not milton actually is one, but it would be a really interesting route to take imo!) idk i've just been hyperfixated on this whole web of stories for weeks now and i'm really excited to see where it goes from here. the characters are so distinct in their personalities and writing styles to the point where i honestly don't have any idea how many writers have pitched into this. regardless of however many, ya'll are doing a great job. keep it up legends. anyways sorry if this is ineligible my adhd is going so hard today🤘😎🔥 but ty for tuning into pandora's hyperfixation ramblings