#muse des

[mythologymadness]

the snow queen is so wholesome. love that story. one of two best friends is cursed by a shard of magic mirror to see and feel everything beautiful to be hideous? other best friend cures him by being the cutest, most loving bff there ever was and melting his ice cold heart? fuck yeah.

[mythologymadness]

if youre named ivan and youre a protagonist in a russian folktale, i am so sorry but things are going to get bad really quick

[mythologymadness]

What Your Greek Mythology Ships Say About You: Part 2

part one here

Heracles/ Megara - You love the Disney movie and either separate the movie and the myths in your mind or you don't think canon exists. They live a happy life right? Hahaha right?

Perseus/ Andromeda - Perseus got a happy ending, tons of kids, and a happy marriage, and that was all you could have asked from ancient greek poets

Perseus/ Hermes - All you’re saying is bisexual king Perseus rights and I stand with you.

Hermes/ Hecate - You just. Really like Hecate. Like it’s kind of becoming an obsession.

Apollo/ Hermes/ Dionysus - You are @greek-mythographer or just think homoerotic bromances are cool.

Thanatos/ Hermes - You’re into the grumpy/ sunshine trope.

Hermes/ Charon - You played Hades.

Jason/ Medea - You're only here to watch Medea bitch slap Jason (but maybe not kill their children) and really, who can blame you?

Minos/ Pasiphae - Are you? Okay?

Echo/ Narcissus - You’re an apologist, aren’t you?

Narcissus/ Narcissus - You’re also an apologist, aren’t you?

Poseidon/ Aphrodite/ Nerites - As far as you’re concerned, two dramatic, protective water deities is better than one

Poseidon/ Aphrodite/ Ares - You saw @greekschist‘s Poseidon/ Aphrodite brotp content and decided that Ares didn’t need to be left out.

Amphitrite/ Hera/ Persephone - You just think that the kings need to sit down and let the queens speak.

Aphrodite/ Hera/ Persephone - You just really love beautiful women. (also I can't believe you left out Amphitrite, how dare you?)

Aphrodite/ Adonis - God damn it Ares.

Zeus/ Poseidon/ Hades - You thought to yourself, "Well, incest doesn't matter in the myths". Or maybe you just think the kings need to stop the hostility and fight it out in another way.

Poseidon/ Hades - You liked Zeus and Hades but you like Poseidon even more.

Poseidon/ Pelops - You support wingman Poseidon and think Pelops’s comeback was kind of iconic, actually.

Helios/ Apollo - Your addiction to pretty sun boys got so bad you thought, what's better than one sunny boy? Two sunny boys!

Helios/ Icarus/ Apollo - You realized the “Icarus flies towards the sun for godly dick” modern interpretation could be made even spicier.

Echidna/ Typhon - Poseidon is the og monster fucker, who?

Meleager/ Atalanta - You're extremely salty that Meleager had to die.

Hippomenes/ Atalanta - You're a slut for girlboss × malewife.

Cyrene/ Ares - You don't understand why people want a speedy, smart blond when there's an angry himbo.

Agamemnon/ Clytemnestra - You're only here for Clytemnestra murdering her husband and really, who can blame you?

Patroclus/ Briseis - You read TSOA and don't understand why people want a speedy smart blond when there's a pretty, sweet girl.

Achilles/ Briseis - What.

Theseus/ Ariadne - God damn it, Theseus (or Dionysus, depending on the version)

Theseus/ Asterius - You played Hades.

Gaia/ Ouranos - "He doesn't deserve you. If he doesn't treat you right by now, you're gone." "I'm gone." "Now go CHOP HIS DICK OFF."

Kronos/ Rhea - Either you’re @godsofhumanity and you think that maybe Kronos had his own story to tell or you just think Rhea should have maybe punched her husband a few times.

Athena/ Arachne - You just really like rivals to lovers, huh?

Athena/ Medusa - You think conflict over a man should stop and the girls should just kiss (50/50 chance you hate Poseidon)

Orpheus/ Eurydice - You spend way too much time thinking about how Orpheus looking back was an act of love and not mortal weakness or maybe mortal weakness is love and our mortal weakness is what gives us the capacity to love. Which also gives us the thought that our weakness is also our strength and maybe that’s how it should be.

[mythologymadness]

the iliad but its a show shot like the office

[mythologymadness]

does anyone else think about how all of kronos’s children somewhat mirror each other when they’re lined up and how their personalities fit their positions as siblings almost perfectly?

like okay, hestia and hades are the oldest of the sisters and brothers respectively. they are pretty chill overall and have a sort of parental feel to them whether it be doting auntie or exasperated dad. both are more generally logical and quiet but still speak their mind and have a way of commanding the room (i, as an oldest sibling myself, am this description but more angry).

also when theseus and his buddy came to kidnap persephone, hades was well aware of what they wanted to do (and somewhat amused at that), and just humored them with a welcome invitation in his realm, fed them, and then trapped them in the underworld?? oldest sibling energy.

poseidon and demeter are more emotional, if that makes sense. they make most decisions on feelings and opinions which affects everyone because a) they’re the middle man of their siblings and b) their realms are greatly depended on by humans, in a “we literally won’t live without it” way. both are patient and kind, with a gentle bite, when they are calm but are also more easily provoked because they’re so headstrong. they cause a sort of destruction that may not always be extremely severe but their realms bring disaster in large scales, making something not so serious still a hell of an issue. and that’s only when it’s not that serious.

zeus and hera are the head honchos of olympus and i think i can end it here with the knowledge that everyone had read “the three little pigs” but i shall continue. both are also emotional but in a way that is more concealed. they know what their responsibilities are and do what must be done, logical in their own right and always thinking of consequences but unable to ignore their internal feelings. they’re leaders, quick thinkers, and both fuck up because they end up not communicating or rather, not listening. because despite not wanting help out of pride, it’s what they need.

[mythologymadness]

Sun Wukong: What are you, four?

Pigsy: Yeah, four heads taller than you.

Sun Wukong:

Tripitaka: No no, he didn't mean it, he's just joking, don't take it seriously, Wukong no-

[mythologymadness]

princess kaguya and emperor mikado really just became the best of bffs then mikado said “yeah youre really pretty but i have no romantic interest in you lol” and kaguya was like “wait omg me too.”

and then they became even better bffs. 

[mythologymadness]

hector was the one person in troy with the braincells and the authority to command with braincells. of COURSE the trojans fell for the giant wooden horse, hector took all the critical thinking with him.