#my talker

[awetistix]

I have been working on these two pages - my feeling page and my schedule page! looking at, listening to, and touching the buttons and words helps with remembering, understanding, and identifying how I feel, what I need, and what to say. this is a good way to show that my talker is even more than my voice, it is also a look into my mind and life! as always, AAC work keeps going!

[awetistix]

I went to a friend hang out and met new people. at the end, someone said it was nice to actually talk to me this time, which was great because I used my talker the entire time! I don’t think I did last. I did not interact much, I remember. there were fewer people, which made it easier to not be drowned out. all in all, had a good time!

[awetistix]

I have noticed that I have fewer outbursts on the days I use my talker a lot. part of this is because of my self regulation boards. another reason is that my talker can help me ground by focusing my attention on something familiar and specialized for my brain and communication style. it can also slow things down in a good way

[awetistix]

the thing is : with or without my talker, I am often quiet. finding the words to say can be a gargantuan task. seeing words on my talker can help guide me. having muscle memory helps, too. I know it is part of the reciprocity difficulties. I desperately try to figure out what to do. it makes me sad and frustrated. I had a class in middle school where I practiced communication skills. I wonder if that is something I could do again. I liked that it was meant for disabled students, because I often can not keep up with some of the " default " classes. anyway, I guess I just want to express my difficult feelings with communication. I fear that I come across as rude, not interested, not able, or uncooperative. A small but loud part of me is terrified I don't belong with people. I still try.