a small, soft, whimpering noise wakes you. with bleary eyes, you sit up slightly in bed, only to be faced with the musculature of pope's bare back. you take a minute to rub your eyes before pressing a soft kiss to his freckled shoulder.
you know he's crying, but you also know not to rush him. he'll roll over when he's ready. his torso shudders as he takes a deep breath. you slip your hands into his hair and begin to massage his scalp soothingly.
now, pope turns to you slowly, tears slipping down his cheeks. you take your hands out of his hair to brush them away.
"you're okay, baby, you're okay," you coo, delicately cupping his face with your hands.
you guide him to look at you. his eyes wander over your face in response. he seems to find comfort in the familiarity of your features.
"tell me what you need," you encourage quietly.
pope's eyes flick from yours down to your lips. that's when it clicks – this isn't pope right now. no, this is andrew. soft, needy andrew.
"can't give you anything if you don't ask, honey," you whisper.
your nose gently brushes his.
"need you," andrew answers, his voice wobbly and shy.
your hands begin to trail down his body carefully. you're especially gentle near the fresh cuts and bruises he gained from his most recent job.
"more specific, andy," you hum.
a small huff exits his nose.
"need a distraction," he murmurs, shifting to press his hips against yours.
andrew breathes deeply, and you watch as his pupils dilate. a sympathetic smile curls your lips.
"good boy," you purr.
his reaction to the praise is immediate. you can feel the way he throbs in his boxers. you lean in to kiss him softly before pulling back and mouthing at his jaw, then his throat. you glance up quickly to see the way his eyelids flutter shut.
andrew's cheeks are still damp from his tears, creating a soft sheen that glints in the low light of the morning sun. he melts into you, and a small moan slips past his lips easily. that familiar heat grows in your gut, and your thighs squeeze together.
you begin to move down andrew's body, kissing along his pecs, his abs and especially the dusting of hair that leads down, past his underwear. you gaze up at him, and your eyes crinkle with a soft smile. andrew's cheeks are now flushed rather than damp. you think it creates a rather nice contrast to his freckles.
your hand moves up to palm at the bulge, pressing against his boxers. andrew's breath hitches, and his eyes snap open. when his eyes dart down to meet yours, you see that the dilation of his pupils has practically overtaken his irises. of course, you can't help yourself and decide to tease him further until–
"please," andrew murmurs before biting his lip to keep a moan at bay.
you smile and relent. he needs this. he needs you. on instinct, andrew lifts his hips so you can pull his boxers down easily.
when you look up again, you can see the way his blush has begun to spread down to his chest like wildfire. he looks down at you as if you're the only thing that has ever, and will ever, exist.
andrew moans when the cold air hits his cock, bringing you back to the matter at hand. his dick stands tall and pretty, throbbing desperately. a familiar freckle lays at the base of him.
you shuffle down further to get into a comfortable position before leaning down and licking from his balls to his tip. andrew whimpers and bucks his hips, but you move your hands to hold them down. his breathing quickens, but a quick squeeze seems to calm him.
gazing up at him, you gently place his head on your tongue. andrew groans heavily, then slips a hand down to tangle in your hair.
"pretty," he rasps.
a little smile curves your lips – you're conscious of your teeth. leisurely, you close your mouth around him and bob your head up and down. your tongue laves at a thick vein on the underside.
andrew's face seems to be frozen, looking at you with mild shock before melting into intense pleasure. you wrap your hands around the base of him, the bit you can't quite fit in your mouth, and he shudders heavily. one of his little exhales swiftly twists into a whine.
moving your hands and mouth in tandem, you realise this isn't going to last very long. not that it matters. this is for andrew, after all. if you happen to get off, too, that's just a plus.
"gonna... gonna cum," the man above you croaks.
you pull away and gaze up at him happily.
"yeah?" you coo.
he nods, tears welling in his eyes. it just feels so good. your lips stretch over him once more, and he screws his eyes up. a deep breath escapes him.
it's getting too much for him. you know that. you reach up to stroke his chest soothingly. andrew's brown eyes snap open and search for yours. blinking up at him slowly, you silently let him know that it's okay.
his jaw drops open a little, and his hips stutter with need. quickly, he cums. the taste fills your mouth. you swallow happily before pulling back and placing a gentle kiss to his softening cock.
crawling back up his body, you press your lips against his freckles.
"feel good?" you hum happily whilst straddling his stomach.
you brush a stray, sweaty curl behind his ear.
"mhm," andrew exhales.
when your hand falls to his cheek, he nuzzles into your palm shyly. his cheeks are still flushed – you can feel the heat resonating from them. you sit with each other for a bit, and your finger idly draws invisible shapes on his body using your free hand.
suddenly, andrew peeks out from behind your hand. this time, however, his gaze is significantly sharper. before you know it, he's pawing at your hips and flipping you over. his thick, strong fingers are sure to leave bruises.
he's on top now, taking the opportunity to grind against you.
"my turn," he growls into your neck.
when you peel away from him slightly, you can see that look in his eyes again. realisation hits you.
SUMMARY: max' best friend breaks up with her boyfriend in spectacular fashion. maybe this is the push he needs to finally admit he's in love with her.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: i'm genuinely blown away by the kindness and support i've received from everybody so far. i was really nervous to start posting here, but you've all been incredible! i hope that you guys enjoy this one as much as i enjoyed writing it — WARNING that this smau involves references to infidelity (not max or the reader). have fun and feel free to send me requests!
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris, danielricciardo and others
yourusername what better way to take my mind off things. monaco, you were a dream. next stop...?
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maxverstappen1 Thank you for being there. 💛
liked by yourusername
user2 hope you're feeling better!
user3 You should totally go on holiday somewhere and just forget about him tbh
yourusername that's the plan 😉
user1 ugh i hope max dropkicks him into next year
liked by maxverstappen1
danielricciardo my offer still stands...
yourusername you're just built different 😔 aus is too hot for me!!
landonorris thanks for convincing max not to order in the sushi platter
yourusername anything for my favourite papaya 🧡
oscarpiastri hey.
yourusername sorry osc, he's got the longevity :( give it a few months?
user4 oSC????
yourusername added to her story
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo, landonorris and others
yourusername much needed.
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user2 the second pic???
user4 omg i cant believe max and her went together sdjhfhdj
danielricciardo and here i thought aus was too hot for you??
yourusername 🫢
user1 oh theyre in love ur honour
user7 showing the ex what he's missing fr
liked by yourusername
landonorris without me??
yourusername next time xx
user3 the fact this means max took the first pic has me spiralling
user5 no way her ex isnt seething over this LMAO
user6 his fault for cheating imo 🤷
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yourusername
liked by danielricciardo, landonorris and others
yourusername another month, another race. glad to be back 💛
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user2 no max in the likes?
user3 its over i fear
landonorris supporting the hometown boys, i hope?
yourusername count on it!
user1 and if i speak-
user4 don't.
danielricciardo was the coffee as good as he says?
yourusername even better i promise
user5 HE???
user6 surely-
maxverstappen1
liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, landonorris and others
maxverstappen1 Didn't get the win this weekend, but I won something better.
tagged: yourusername
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user1 oh my god.
yourusername thank you for loving me ❤️
maxverstappen1 Always ❤️
user4 its so over for her ex BYE-
user3 more affection than her ex ever showed her i know that's right
user2 They're sickeningly cute I can't rn
user5 parents???
danielricciardo fucking finally
landonorris it was almost painful fr
yourusername oh shut up
oscarpiastri no no he has a point
yourusername do you want me to pay for lunch tmr or not??
notes: jumping into f1 w/ a short something inspired by the cat distribution system being all over my fyp… requests are now open <3
you liked to think that everyone had their own favorite part of the race weekend.
you, for example, might side with the minority of those who enjoyed fridays the most. the air, you had learned during your relationship with ollie, was always lighter. it was easier to joke around, and mistakes or mishaps didn’t seem as severe. they were just- well, fun.
not that qualifying or the race itself weren’t enjoyable to you. you had just found that your stress levels (and heart rate) were significantly lower on that first day.
like now, you were walking around the paddock with hannah, arms linked as she caught you up on the happenings of her life during the last couple of weeks. that was until she cut herself off mid-sentence,
“do you think that we could sneak into mercedes and steal some of those strawberry drinks?” she muses as you walk near their building. you whip your head around and she shrugs her shoulders innocently, “i haven’t stopped thinking about them since carmen let us try hers- oh! maybe i should just text her and see if she could bring us some.”
“that sounds better than getting caught sneaking into another team’s hospitality. besides, i don’t even think that they’re here yet,” you sigh, knowing that some of the rookies had received the notification of an earlier practice time late the night before citing afternoon weather concerns. however, noticing the lack of people around and the nearly cloudless sky, you wonder if they just so happened to draw the shortest stick and the more experienced drivers may have just gotten to come later in the day.
hannah makes a noise and shields her eyes from the beaming sun, “how much trouble do you think that we would get in, seriously?”
“i don’t really want to-” you pause at the sound of your phone ringing. it was early, even earlier back home, so the list of people who could be calling you was a short one. you rifle through your bag and feel yourself come to a sudden halt at seeing your boyfriend’s name flash across the screen.
rarely did you communicate once you split apart after arriving at the track, usually because he was too busy to be on or near his phone besides the occasional ‘wyd’ during a break. even then, you had grown used to your response going unread for another few hours as his schedule picked up. a little too quickly you answer, bringing the phone to your ear as that calmness that you had come so familiar with starts to slip away, “ollie?”
“where are you- oh, shit!” you hear ollie muttering before the phone unmistakably clatters to the ground. the loud noise causes you to jump and pull the phone away from your ear and hannah looks at you concerned. “can someone- thanks, mate. just- speaker is fine. yeah, cheers. y/n?”
“oliver, what’s happened?” the alarm in his voice triggers the panic in yours, causing you to turn your head in the direction of the haas garage where he should be.
“nothing’s happened, love. well- someone found a kitten in the pit lane-”
“a kitten?” you interrupt, nervousness starting to slip away under the realization that there was no emergency. human emergency, that is.
hannah hits your arm and her eyebrows are raised in question but you shake your head as ollie speaks, “yes, a baby cat. they were just going to let it loose outside of the gate, but i couldn’t let them.”
“obviously not. how small is- y’know what,” you cut yourself off and send hannah a look of apology, “i’m coming. where are you?”
“in the garage- ow. please come quick. i don’t think that it likes me,” you assure him that you’re on your way before turning on your heel, shouting at hannah over your shoulder,
“i think we just got chosen by the cat distribution system. we’ll have to catch up later!”
you get some strange looks as you run through the paddock toward the haas garage. you could here the clicks of cameras as you weave your way through the free practice day traffic, even swear that there’s quick footsteps following you to see what the commotion was about. you smooth your hands down your black dress as you look around frantically upon entering the back door of the garage, “ollie?”
“oh, thank god,” your boyfriend looks relieved to see you. he has what you can only guess is a bundled up hoodie pressed to his chest as he crosses the floor. you hear little cries coming from the bundle and you frown gripping onto his arm as you push yourself onto your tiptoes to sneak a peek, “i don’t think you want to get close. it was hissing earlier-”
“it’s probably terrified, ollie. where did they pull it out from?” you push the hoodie away and a tiny, grey head comes into view. it pokes it’s head out curiously and when you tentatively reach a hand out, it doesn’t pull away when you caress its head gently, “oh, you’re a sweet thing aren’t you? all these noises and some scary men trying to turn you loose is overwhelming, i can imagine.”
“i think they found her at alpine. i saw them walking towards the barrier and stopped them,” ollie carefully hands over the bundle and watches you cuddle it to your chest, “i knew you could probably figure something out.”
“ugh, alpine,” you mutter under your breath, “no, we’ll find somewhere for you to go.”
“you look into shelters. maybe i can post something on my instagram if that doesn’t work,” he looks at you and you see his expression fall. he sighs and runs a hand through his hair, “you’ve already found a home for it, haven’t you?”
“oh she’s just a darling, ollie,” you hum, having to contain your squeal as she nuzzles into your chest. you look at him almost pleadingly, though your own mind was already made up and there was no way you were leaving this kitten behind, “i think i’m in love.”
he opens his mouth, but is interrupted by ronan calling out from across the way, “ollie, mate, we’ve got to get on the track.”
“yeah,” he calls, not letting his eyes leave you or the kitten that had seemingly gotten comfortable in your arms, “i get to pick the name.”
“ollie,” you start, but quickly remember where you were and suddenly become very aware of ronan looming behind your boyfriend, looking at the two of you expectantly, “fine, whatever. go be great and be safe. i love you.”
“love you too,” he hums, a triumphant look on his face as he swoops down to press a quick kiss to your lips. he lingers for a moment, seemingly considering petting the kitten, but by the way its eyes had opened at your movement and were now looking at him almost daringly, he decides against it. he grins, “i think i like bolganase.”
“go,” you shoo him away and he goes with a loud laugh. you make your way towards the exit and press a kick kiss to the top of it’s head which causes her to make a noise of satisfaction, “i won’t let him name you bolganase, i promise.”
masterlist ; series masterlist ; series playlist ; previous chapter ; next chapter
cw: college au, allusions to smut, reader has a hickey, reader is being really stupid this chapter, steve is so obsessed with reader, hurt/little comfort if you squint
wc: 4.5k
a/n: big, long, yearning, plot-filled chapter! gearing up for another special chapter at the end... who knows!
Things changed drastically after Steve’s housewarming party.
Your friends remained none the wiser, simply assuming that with Jade out of the picture, Steve just became more tolerable, and you stopped being so cold to him. They knew you two were civil and studying together again, but you had told them that was because you’d been paired up on a project.
But, there was never a project.
You two had fallen back into your old ways— sneaking around, late-night rendezvous, spending the wee hours of the morning tangled in the backseat of his BMW. You’d even gained new aspects of your arrangement, like a sneaky hand with a habit of poking the side of your thigh in the lecture hall, almost-dry leaves pressed flat in your borrowed textbook, your favorite tea and breakfast sandwich placed on your table in the library.
You both had agreed on no strings after his party, but it really felt like the boy had sewn every string he had to give into you. You tried severing every single one regularly— only calling after midnight, keeping your steely exterior as solid as stone, and brushing off any of his advances outside of the privacy of his bedroom. You tried and tried and tried, but Steve Harrington was possibly the most stubborn person you’ve ever encountered.
You could feel his stubbornness now, as you stood on your toes and looked at yourself in the mirror, the wiry tips of a mini whisk pressing uncomfortably against your throat. You were twisting the tool back and forth in an attempt to break up the hickey he had left on you the night before, considering you didn’t bring your concealer with you to his house.
You broke your main rule and slept over. You hadn’t done that before. You were regretting it tenfold.
“Come on. It’s not that bad,” The boy in question sauntered into the bathroom, donning a pair of jeans and a warm cable knit sweater. He came up behind you suddenly and wrapped his arms around your shoulders, causing you to lower your arm. “Just put a hoodie on. Problem solved.”
“I don’t have a hoodie here, Steve,” You grumbled, using one hand to peel his arm away from the right side of your neck just enough to give you access to the bruise again. You weren’t quite ready to lose the warmth of his skin on yours yet.
“Just take one of mine, I have plenty,” He shrugged, wrapping around you tighter. You dropped your hand and set the whisk on the counter. “Seriously. Have your pick.”
You sighed and leaned back into him. “You just don’t know how to listen, do you?”
“Not when it comes to you,” He hummed, ducking his head down to kiss your temple. “Wanna go get breakfast before class?”
“I need to go home and change. I’m probably not going to be ready until class—“
“I have a car, remember?”
“You’re not driving me to class. Or to my house. Alex is home and I’m pretty sure Robin’s over,” You said simply, face stoic. You reached over and flicked open your phone, seeing a barrage of texts from Alex about where you were and why you hadn’t come home last night. “Yeah. She’s freaking out.”
“So what?” Steve all but whined, moving his arms to spin you around. You huffed and looked up at him, crossing your arms over your chest as his hands squeezed at your hips. “She knows we have class together. I’m just being a good classmate and giving you a ride. Simple.”
You gave him the same look you always gave him. The one that silently reminded him of your arrangement, and how unmoving you were about said arrangement.
“Alright. At least let me pretend like I’m just picking you up. And let me get you breakfast,” He reasoned, looking down at you with the smile that always made you just a little weak in the knees. “It’s the least I could do. You broke your one rule for me, so I’m repaying you.”
You glared at him. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your lips and unraveled from you, stepping back. “Don’t remind me.”
“If you don’t hurry up, we’re gonna be late for class, sweetheart,” He hummed. “I’ll be waiting for you.”
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever,” You huffed and gathered your things from the bathroom, moving through his apartment with practiced speed and grace. You put your things back in your purse, grabbed the most non-Steve hoodie you could from his closet, tossed on your leather jacket, and shoved your feet back into your shoes in record time. You didn’t bid him adieu as you rushed out the door and down his front steps.
You made it down the block back to your apartment in record time, punching in and making your way to your front door as quietly as possible. You had one hand on the doorknob when the door was thrown open dramatically, thus almost pulling you inside with your grip.
“Where the hell were you? Are you doing the walk of shame on a Tuesday?” Alex rambled in your face, yanking you the rest of the way inside. Robin popped out from the kitchen, jogging toward the two of you. “Spill. Now. I was worried sick.”
“I was literally just at a classmate’s apartment, chill out,” You huffed, ignoring the feeling of the collar of the hoodie scratching against the fresh hickey. “We were studying and it got way too late, and she lives in Uptown. She didn’t want me taking the train, so I crashed on her couch.”
Alex’s lips tightened into a thin line. “You stole a hoodie too?”
“Yes. It was freezing this morning, in case you forgot,” You rolled your eyes and made your way past the couple to the hallway, heading for your room.
“It’s a cute hoodie, in their defense,” Robin reasoned, making your stomach drop. “It looks comfy.”
You picked up the pace and headed into your room, heart racing. You quickly stripped your layers and changed into the first pair of jeans you could find, a black tank top, and your favorite zip-up with a faux fur collar. You topped it with your leather jacket and fluffed the collars to cover the bruise as best you could before heading toward your vanity and touching up your makeup and hair from the night before.
You haphazardly covered the hickey as best you could with some concealer and a prayer, grabbing your school bag and flitting out of the apartment in record time. You were shoving your feet into your leather boots when Alex rounded on you again, her eyes scanning you over and over.
“What is your guy’s problem? Jesus Christ,” You huffed, standing after your left shoe had finally gone over your heel. “Can a girl go to class in peace?”
“You smell like cologne,” Alex said, narrowing her eyes. “You are totally doing a walk of shame!”
“I’m not, okay? I told you that I was with a classmate— she could be into wearing cologne. I don’t really pay attention to what people smell like,” You pinched the bridge of your nose and sighed. “Trust me, if I were hooking up with someone you’d know, alright?”
Alex gave you another once-over and nodded, but you could tell she was still suspicious.
“Okay. I trust you,” She raised an eyebrow.
“Pinky swear, babe,” You nodded at her and went back toward your room briefly. “I just gotta grab my textbook and then I’m heading to class. I’ll see you later?”
“Yeah, we’ll be here after running to the fabric store later,” Alex hummed, going back into the kitchen.
You rushed to flip open your phone and shoot Steve a text.
——
pick me up down the street
like two blocks down
What? Why?
alex is suspicious
So?
she’ll kill me if she finds out i was with
you last night
like shoot me dead and skin me
Was I that bad?
do you want me to answer that?
I’m waiting down the street for you.
——
You scoff and turn back out of your room, rushing right back out of the front door. You headed in the opposite direction of Steve’s apartment, toward where you knew that Alex knew your classes normally were. True to his word, Steve’s maroon BMW was parked at the corner, far enough out of view from your living room window. You hopped into the passenger side and let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding as you clicked your seatbelt into place.
“Thanks for doing that on such short notice, I just didn’t—“
“Does Alex hate me?” Steve turned to ask, his jaw tenser than it had been this morning.
Your heartbeat began to race, a breath falling from your lips quickly. “No. She doesn’t. She loves you, she just doesn’t exactly like the idea of us together.”
“Why? I don’t understand.”
“Can we not do this right now? We have class—“
“Class be damned, I want to know why she doesn’t want us together,” He shook his head and put the car in park. He turned fully then, nodding toward you. “Go on.”
“Steve. Do you seriously not get why she wouldn’t want us together?” You snorted.
“No, I don’t.”
“Because she’s my roommate. She lives with me, lived with me the whole time we were seeing each other the first time….” You tried to lead him into it. He just looked at you. “Dude. You have to be kidding.”
“I’m serious,” He said, voice rising ever so slightly. “You’re not taking this seriously.”
“You hurt me really badly, Steve,” You matched his tone. Neither of you was yelling, just… getting a little loud. “She had to drag me out of bed to get me to go to class for at least two weeks. She had to force me to get up and go out so that I wouldn’t just spend all of my time in my room wondering what the problem was with me, and what I did wrong. She dealt with me feeling like that until the end of the semester when I didn’t have to see you in class anymore.”
Steve went quiet. His eyes were a little wide, and his cheeks were a little pink.
“When I told you that I don’t think that you fully understand what happened between us, I was serious,” You shrug. “It really fucking sucked. But that was months ago, so I don’t really know what she’s feeling now. But that’s what I can assume she feels. Does that make sense?”
“Yeah, yeah,” He nodded, clearing his throat. “That, uh, that makes sense. I didn’t realize I caused you that much pain. I’m so sorry that I put you through that.”
You felt disgustingly nauseous. Like, you could open the door and puke-your-guts-out nauseous. You ignored your pounding heartbeat and shrugged. You kept your face as neutral and your voice as nonchalant as you could as you lied through your teeth. “It’s fine. I just liked you a lot more than you liked me. I’ve accepted it, moved on, and that’s why this whole thing works now.”
You refused to look at him, knowing his face had crumpled. You hated having to keep yourself so guarded, your feelings pushed so far into yourself that you felt a ticking bomb that was ready to explode. But it was for the best. You couldn’t let yourself get hurt again.
But having to hurt Steve in the process made it almost unbearably painful to protect yourself.
“Can I give you a hug?” He said quietly from beside you, making you turn your head. “I feel like if I do that, you’ll believe me. Because I know you don’t believe that I’m sorry.”
You let out a breath, chest aching. “I never said that.”
“You didn’t have to.”
You let it remain silent for a beat in the car. It felt deafening. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Steve.”
You saw his lips press into a thin line. “Please?”
Don’t. Don’t do it. It’ll make this whole thing worse.
You closed your eyes for a moment and unbuckled your seatbelt, lifting from your seat a little and turning to face him. He copied your actions, leaning to meet you over the center console. He tucked his face into the crook of your neck and his arms snaked around you beneath the open zipper of your leather jacket, touch strong and steady, like he was afraid you were going to vanish into dust between his fingers.
You hooked your chin over his shoulder and tried not to inhale, knowing he had just showered and gotten ready. The scent of his cologne mixed with the clear and soapy scent of the shampoo you had suggested he use almost a year ago always made you dizzy, and you didn’t need to be crying right now.
You really, really, really can’t let yourself cry.
You look up toward the ceiling as you feel his breath on your neck, the peck of his lips against your pulse point. You feel the indent of his ring squeezing around your waist through the thin material of your sweatshirt, the weight of it making your chest rattle. His hair tickles beneath your chin, but you desperately try not to lean into him any more than you already are.
You’re first to pull away after the few tender moments you let him hold you, but he didn’t let you go far. He just lifted his head to press your foreheads together, and you had to try not to let your quickened breathing turn into more of a physical reaction. You let him keep you close, hands perched on his shoulders.
“You make it incredibly hard to keep this up without any strings attached,” He said softly, one hand brushing some of your hair away from your face, the wide spread of his palm resting against the side of your neck where he had just hidden himself. “You have too much of me already.”
You inhaled in an attempt to stave back your emotions once more and separated your forehead from his, leaning back into your seat.
“We’re late, Steve,” You almost whispered, pulling your legs into yourself on his passenger seat. “We should get going.”
He stayed in his spot for a moment, leaned toward you, and turned away from the wheel. He took his time getting back into his seat properly, buckling himself in, and starting to drive you both to class.
You felt like you were going to pass out the entire time from how fast your heart was beating.
———————
You didn’t see him for a few days after that. Your schedules didn’t align, you worked, he worked, you cried in your bed, he didn’t answer the phone. You didn’t blame him, though. You deserved the cold shoulder.
When you had class with him again, he didn’t shy away from you. He got there later than you, but still sat beside you, legs open just wide enough to nudge yours when the professor said something that made you fight the urge to roll your eyes. You had a blank page open in your notebook on the desk attached to your seat, just in reach for both of you to write notes to each other and doodle during the lecture, like always.
You scribbled “U Home @ 6?” beside his ongoing series of cartoon dinosaurs wearing silly hats and poked your elbow into his bicep. He glanced at your note, you saw his jaw twitch, and he simply shrugged.
He scribbled back, “Why?”
You wrote, “Wanted to show u a new movie. I rented it and I think you’d like it.”
He shrugged again. “IDK.”
You glanced toward him and nodded, getting the hint. You put your pencil down and turned your attention back to the lecture, ignoring the gnawing pain of guilt in your stomach.
His hand squeezed your knee afterward, his eyes telling you all that you needed to know.
He was hurt. You hurt him. You had finally done what you had thought of doing back on Halloween.
You stood from your seat suddenly and rushed out of the lecture hall, rushing through the halls of your college toward the one single-stall bathroom in the entire building. You locked the door behind you and speed-dialed Alex, your hands shaking.
“What’s wrong? Are you not in class right now?” She said as soon as the phone rang once. “Are you okay?”
“I’m a horrible fucking person,” You said, voice quiet and shaky as tears brimmed your waterline. “I fucked up. Like, really fucked up.”
“You’re seeing Steve again, aren’t you?” She sighed. “Babe, I told you it wasn’t good for you—“
“No, Alex, you have it all wrong,” Your voice broke, a tear dropping onto your cheek. “I hurt him. He practically confessed his feelings for me and I fucking blew it. I brushed it off, I told him that I’m over him, and I lied straight to his fucking face about it.”
“He did it to you first! Did you forget that you were wrecked over him for weeks—“
“If I could forget that, this would all be ten times easier,” You groaned. “I can’t do it. I feel like I’m literally killing myself trying to protect my feelings. This is fucking ridiculous.”
It’s quiet on the other line for a moment. “You love him, don’t you?”
You choked on your breath then, your throat tight. Your heart stopped and your brain ran at a mile a minute.
“I think I might.”
“Good. He told Robin when you got back from his house on Tuesday that he’s in love with you and doesn’t know what to do about it,” She exhaled dramatically. “You two are so fucking stupid. I suggest you tell him.”
“There’s no way he feels that now. I think I literally watched his heart break in half the last time we talked,” You huffed, running a hand through your hair. “I don’t know if he’ll even believe me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I literally asked to see him today and he just brushed me off. He wants nothing to do with me—“
“Oh my god. Do we need to lock you two in a fucking room together? Just go talk to him!”
“Alex—“
“Okay, listen. You know what you have to do. It’s up to you to do it. I’m not going to force you to do anything,” You could almost hear her pinching the bridge of her nose through the phone. “We can talk about it when you finally have the conversation. You can’t keep putting yourself through this.”
You swallow and try to stop your tears. “Okay.”
“Okay. I’ll see you when you get home, alright?”
“Yeah. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’m not the one you need to apologize to.”
You click the phone closed and do your best to wipe away your tears and look presentable to go back into the lecture hall.
You were not going to tell him. You couldn’t.
You’ll wait until he’s willing to talk again, and then put an end to whatever the two of you had going on.
You had to.
———————
You let it fester for almost another two weeks. You had danced on eggshells around Steve, who still wasn’t ignoring you. He still brought you pastries and little trinkets, and he still poked you and shot his kilowatt smile at you every time you glanced at him. He still walked you to the library and back to your apartment while talking your ear off, but never pushed to see you after the fact. It stung, but you didn’t penalize him for it. He was being a lot more understanding than you had been.
You were swirling your drink around as you sat tucked into the corner of his couch when things started to shift again. He had invited your friends over for a game night at the tail end of finals week, a bit of a celebration before everyone went back to their hometowns to visit family and take a much-needed break.
You thought you were the only one staying in Chicago for break since your parents had booked a vacation with your younger siblings that you couldn’t go to. You didn’t renew your passport in time because of the chaos of your packed semester, so you didn’t feel too much animosity toward them for it. You would get phone calls and a takeout order delivered to your apartment, along with a gift exchange next time you could make it home.
You were watching the frothy pink wine in your cup splash against the sides of the crystal glass when you felt someone tap your shoulder from behind. Steve was leaning over the back of the couch, cheeks pink with the few mixed drinks he had downed and a goofy grin on his face from the third game of Slapjack he had won in the last hour. You had watched his celebratory dance every time, ignoring the beat of your heart in your throat.
“You look gloomy,” He pouted, hair falling toward his face as he dipped his head into your space. “What’s got you so down in the dumps?”
You simply shrugged. “I’m not gloomy. Just tired. It’s been a long week.”
“I know, that’s why everyone’s here, duh,” He scoffed, joking. “It’s a stress-reliever, non-denominational holiday party. You’re supposed to let loose before everyone leaves for a few weeks.”
“I have almost a month and a half of an empty apartment to relax in,” You hum, taking a sip of your warm drink. “I still have a project to finalize when I get home anyway. But I like watching the revelries. It’s nice seeing everyone not wanting to lose their minds for a little bit.”
“You’re not going home?” He asked, eyebrows adorably furrowed. It made your cheeks feel warm, your mind spinning with how concerned he looked for you. “I thought your family was going to visit your other family in Canada.”
“Didn’t renew my passport in time and it’s too much of a hassle to get an emergency one for like a week of travel,” You hum, leaning back in your seat to look up at him better. “So I’m staying. Since I’ve gotten that on-campus gig, I’m not working over breaks, so I’m probably just going to sleep in and maybe deep clean, or something.”
“Well,” He started, lips pursed and moving as he debated continuing. He looked up at the wall and back down at you, eyes softening as he did so. “I have a proposition for you.”
“You do?” You raised an eyebrow, pulse quickening. “What’s the proposition?”
“I’m driving back to Indiana for, like, max two days, if you maybe…” He trailed off for a moment, the rest of the sentence coming out in an exhale. “kinda-sorta wanted to come with me.”
Your eyes couldn’t help but widen. “Really? You want me to come with you to your family’s Christmas?”
“Well, not my family’s Christmas,” He moved his head back and forth, making you smile. “They go on a ski trip every year. I normally do all the fun Christmas things in two days and deck my house out, then make a nice dinner for myself on the day of.”
“You’re always alone during the holidays?” You said, turning a little more toward him. “I’m sorry. That sounds miserable.”
“Not when I have enough holiday cheer to power an entire light show,” He grinned widely, getting a little too close for the situation the two of you were in. You didn’t mind too much, letting the nagging voice at the back of your head get drowned in him. “So? D’ya wanna come with me?”
“Are you sure that you want me to come?” You asked quietly. “I don’t want to intrude.”
“It’s not intruding if I invite you, silly,” He hummed. “I want you to come with. I’d rather spend the time with you than alone.”
Your heart soared, cheeks warm and stomach full of butterflies. “That would be really nice.”
“It will be. I’m gonna take you to do all of the things,” He said while rounding the couch and plopping down into the seat next to you, leg and arm pressing against yours. There wasn’t an armrest to separate you now. “We’re going to go to the tree farm and the lights show, and we’re going to decorate the fuck out of my house while probably some of the worst holiday specials in the background. It’ll be just like a movie.”
“You thought this all through, huh?” You teased, poking him with your elbow. “I’m honored. It sounds like a nice time.”
“A little. I just happened to be lucky enough that you happened to be free,” He leaned into your space again, so close you could feel his breath on your cheek. You instinctively leaned into him, like the game of Go Fish that had broken out was too loud for the living room. “I was going to ask you anyway, but you opened the door. I just happened to walk right in.”
You snorted, shuffling a little deeper into the couch. “I’m excited, though. My family isn’t big into any of that tradition stuff. I don’t think I’ve ever had a real tree.”
Steve looked at you like you had just shot his firstborn in front of his face. He sat straight, turned toward you, and let his jaw drop dramatically. “You’re kidding.”
“I’m not! Seriously.”
He reached over and gently pulled you to sit straight, one hand on each of your biceps, shaking you slightly. “You’ve never had a real tree? Like, ever?”
You giggled like a schoolgirl as he shook you, a laugh of his own following. Your hands landed on his wrists, not removing the contact, but making sure he wouldn’t let go. “No! We’ve had the same one since I was like 12. The fake ones last like forever, so it’s cheaper in the long run!”
“Oh, I’m going to turn our tree-getting-trip into a whole thing,” He said, turning deathly serious, his shaking stopping suddenly. “I’m talking bundling up, hot cocoa with candy canes, the works. I’m going to torture you.”
You continued laughing with him, the smooth feeling of his liquor-warmed skin against your palms making your thoughts turn into mush.
One thought rang clear in your head after both of your childish laughter began to die into quiet snickering and breathless chuckles. You remembered the night you had broken everything off for what you thought would be forever, when you had decided your favorite place to have Steve was between your legs.
You thought that whoever that girl was back in early June was out of her mind. You think that she knew deep down that her favorite place for Steve to be was at her side, laughing and smiling at her like she had crafted the heavens in your hands.
Because god, she’d be crazy to think the perfect place for him was anywhere else.
reply to be added to my stranger things taglist <3
・・・He cradles your face again and leans into your neck. With the way he's breathing, he must be losing his battle for self control・・・
this meant to be way shorter and i just kept going with it. enjoy
ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧
⋆tags: biting, blood mention, kissing, stalking habits, soft yandere, vampire cowboy i love u, didn't proofread srry
⋆words: 1.2k
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Vampire cowboy that can’t resist watching you from the cornfields at night.
He blends in all too easily. Waiting to catch you pass by an open window.
Your form spotted by the glow of your bedroom lamp. He doesn’t blink as he observes you slowly stretch muscles that are put to good use on the field.
You just introduced yourself to him a month ago, being his closest neighbor a couple miles away, but he's been in this very spot for almost every nightfall.
Vampire cowboy that knows this feeling well. A sudden hungry obsession, not just for your human blood, but your being. He never stays in one location for too long; the townsfolk begin to wonder how he never changes. People question-- they get curious. Curious is bad, unless it's you.
He'll figure out a way to warm himself in your life. Once he's determined, nothing will prevent him from carving his path. But he knows to be slow with it. time has always been his friend.
Meanwhile, you can't help but wonder about your neighbor. You glance every time you pass his ranch. Lots of land, sure, but it's oddly empty aside from two black horses. He seems to be a night owl too, given from his lamplight glowing in the windows.
You unexpectedly run into him as the evening lowers itself into night. Frogs and crickets echo throughout the trail you're on, giving you the cue to retreat back home, when you hear footsteps. You tense, only to come face to face with your neighbor. He did not seem like the type to conversation, based on your initial meeting, but he spoke first.
"Good evenin'," he greeted, his gloved hands touching the brim of his black cowboy hat. He's got his rifle strapped to his back, you realized.
You smile at yourself, feeling foolish you were caught by surprise. His long dark hair lays close to his face, but you could still see his matured features. He works hard, for whatever he must do.
"Good evenin'," you nod back. He notices you spot the rifle strapped behind his back.
"Goin' hunting," he commented. He truly was, but he didn't need a gun for that. He knew you were on the trail in the woods and timed himself perfect for this very moment. Seeing you while there was some glow to the end of the day was intoxicating for him. He knew he surprised you, and your heart still beats heavy with anticipation.
"You get back safe, ya?" He said, his tone neither passive nor dominant. He begins to take a few steps forward, already passing through the conversation. You tell him the same and he almost chuckles at that. there's real irony there.
You both part ways in the opposite direction. But he watches you walk, your back turned to him. He's already starving for the blood of the stag he plans to capture tonight; seeing you so close almost made him lose control.
It's too early, he tells himself. He'll snake through your ribs and cushion your heart. Then you'll understand: submit to him, free yourself from your mortal life.
The sun is now blurred with night, casting a deep, rich blue that shadowed over everything. He could get you now, it would be so easy. You already look flustered when you see him.
--
He can see it perfectly in his mind:
Imagine how you already taste like. There's a warm, humid feeling in the night air. He's hiding in the dark, like an owl flying with pure silence to capture it's prey. You're sitting alone, watching a raging bonfire. He'll enclose you in an embrace, in hopes it doesn't startle you too bad. It does, but realizing its him sparks something differently inside you. Very, very deep.
He can slightly smell the salty sweat on your skin. Rose oil on your hands and a sip of whiskey on your mouth. That alone drives him to an intoxicating state. That fire will kill him, but it's the last thing on his mind.
He already leans heavy into your neck, taking a deep inhale against your soft flesh. He's tall and damn well muscular, with his hands against your body you weren't going anywhere. You longed for this. Catching his eyes from time to time. Randomly seeing him by himself, mysterious as ever. The country nighttime was not the safest, but when you imagined him out there it somehow gave you ease.
"My darlin'," he hushes, his voice deeper. He licks with patience against your neck and your immediate shiver pleases him. "Do you trust me?" he asked softly. A hand snakes up your ribs and you catch your breath. With feather light touch, it caresses the other side of your cheek with a shocking tenderness. There's a chill in the air that beckons you further from the fire. Without realizing what you were doing, you nodded.
"Yes," you breathed. he turns you with him, his back now facing the fire. He gently sits you against the untamed grass, his figure illuminated against the night sky above him. It was then, right there, you realized he wasn't normal.
He crouches down on all four limbs, stalking closer to you with precise movement. He cradles your face again and leans into your neck. with the way he's breathing, he must be losing his battle for self control.
"Be a good girl, now," he murmured, his grip on you only tighter. "I promise darlin', you'll be well taken care of."
He opens his mouth, his teeth exposed for only a second before he bites down. The pain is a slap to the face, every part of your body on sudden high alert. Your nerves tingle with sensation, in the next few seconds, the bite begins to feel icy as it sends a shiver down your spine.
His gloved hand covers your mouth, inhaling the scent of his leather and smoke. Another minute passes by and the pain fades to a dull throb. He laps at the blood, swallowing everything.
You're high on this pleasurable pain and the feeling of the pure cold earth below you. You clench his shoulders hard enough to hurt a human, but for him it's the only kind of response he wants. He removes himself, his lips smeared with the dark blood; it looks black in this night.
He kisses you deeply, roughly, his tongue dominating your mouth within seconds. He wants you to know how good you taste. He wants to give you the greatest pleasure he can give.
And now that he's marked you, that's final.
--
The night has fully set, you are already safe inside, and vampire cowboy runs with the coyotes deep in the forest.
The vision loops on his mind, second by second. He'll perfect it, just for you.
I forgot to post it when it was complete but I entered the project sekai outfit contest again this month with a tenshi kaiwai toya design!!!
I made one outfit colour too many so sadly the orca colour scheme won’t be available if I win, but I’m super super proud of this one!!! This months theme was cafe, so I went for a trendy and relaxing bunny cafe where the customers can relax with and feed treats to rabbits and unwind!! I think toya would be really suited to this environment, since it’s fashionable and lowkey with calmness and patience as a necessity. I wanted to riff on ita-culture and oshikatsu so the tracksuit pants have ita pockets that contain treats that rabbits like to eat!!
The colour schemes are tenshi x dutch rabbit, vivid x minirex, pastel x white rabbit and lovecore x californian rabbit!! (the bonus colourway is orca x dutch rabbit!)
I hope everyone enjoys this one since it took a lot of hard work and I’m rly proud of the results! I doubt it’ll get any fanart unless I win, but you’re free to do so if you’d like! Fingers crossed maybe I’ll be able to win or get honourable mention this time..?
Official entry and design notes can be found here!
Y'ALL THIS IS GONNA BE RELEVANT AND NOT RANDOM, TRUST.......
Te: spelling mistakes
Chapter 2.
WARM UP!
Green wakes up in an empty wasteland. Well, he knew he was dreaming. Mostly because he didn't have six fingers yesterday.
There was a single tree, and a bench next to it. A man was sitting on the bench, he was looking straight at Green. Green was about 30 feet in front of the bench, he got up slowly. The man patted the seat next to him. Smiling. Patient. It only made Green scared. But, hey, at least he knows this isn't real.
He walked to the man slowly, the man staring at him the whole time. It felt awkward... He sat down. The wasteland changed into a Clif. The Clif ended right where he was standing just a minute ago. He only realized he was in his usual field uniform when he looked down
He felt... Disgusting, for some reason. Like there was something under his skin.
"Green." The man said in a soft voice.
Green jumped slightly, but didn't say anything back. What was he supposed to day?
"You're not gonna be able to lie forever."
Green finally spoke up
"I can try."
"But why lie?"
"About what?
"Your name, your clearance, your life before them, your family... What happened before they joined."
Green stayed silent. For a while. The tree branches moved. The man waited for him to speak
"They don't need to know that stuff... As for what happened before they joined. I don't have the courage to tell them"
"but if you don't tell them, they'll figure it out on their own."
"Yes. But I can just erase their memories"
The man Laughed. And then looked at Green. The man's eyes felt empty
"One of the Castaways is immune to that...~"
Green froze... Who could it be? Molly? Lawrence? Amelia? Carson? Gustav? Who?
"She is only pretending not to remember you. She isn't scared to confront you anymore. Just waiting for the perfect timing."
"Who?"
"That," The man tapped Green on the head "is for you to figure out..."
Green glared at the man, until he felt a hand on his shoulder. Gloved.
"Green. You can either tell them. Or I will tell her myself."
Green had nothing worth saying. So he stayed silent
"Are you gonna tell them, agent? Tell them."
"you don't know what I've been through. If I tell them one sentence- no, scratch that. If I tell them one WORD about what happened that Friday? They are gonna behead me."
"oh Green." The man laughed at Green gleefully "big talk for someone who has no weapons!"
The man suddenly punched Green in the stomach. Or at least that's what he thought happened... It took one look down to realize he was stabbed. Not punched. there is a giant gash near his stomach, he didn't feel the pain he thought he would... Just... Shocked. It hurt, yes. But not as much as Green imagined. Just a strange, internal pressure. A sudden, intense burning or a feeling of freezing cold, as the colder steel entered his body. Green gasped and fell out of his seat onto the ground
"fuck you!" Green yelled at the man
"Green... So you know what day it is?"
"...wh...what??"
The man knelt and grabbed Green's chin, forcing him to look at the man... Those eyes... Nobody.
"y...you."
"when was the last time you ate? Went outside? When did you last see your friends? Your family?"
Green couldn't answer anything. He hasn't been eating. He never went outside if it wasn't for work. He hasn't talked to Carson in months. And his family...
"why are you so worried that Amelia will find out."
The knife was pulled out. Nobody put pressure on the wound as Green spoke through his teeth and his own tears
"she's... She's talking to this man."
"what's his name?"
"she calls him Redd..."
Nobody put more pressure
"why are you worried"
"FUCK... because... Because that's the initials of Ruiz Duchamp... Ruiz Edward David Duchamp."
"good memory... One last question before I let you wake up."
Greens mouth filled with blood
"Did you miss me?"
Green heard a faint, masculine but younger voice calling out to him in the real world. He didn't have to answer. But Green spat out one word anyways
"yes."
Nobody's smile faltered and he immediately kicked sand into Green's eyes... Green passed out in the dream
"Green... You're not gonna be able to tell her anymore."
