Help wanted :In need of self love
I waking up everyday hating the skin I’m in .every time I wake up I have a huge burden of all my imperfections. I want clear skin that I don’t have . I want a flat tummy with no stretch marks but this stubborn fat won’t go . I want a slim waist but it seems my mid section wants to be box shaped. I want a pretty butt the smooth and clear of any marks but I have problem ..that I’m working on atleast. I feel like I have the potential to be a very beautiful person but it kills me to look at my self because of my acne marks and arm and belly fat .I’ve been exercising and using every scrub and moisturizer known to man to help achieve that body image I want . But when I look in the mirror I have myself I wanna rip my skin off . And I know 30lb and sane scars shouldn’t bother me , but it does soooo bad . I wanna blame society for making girls of color feel they have to look a certain way long hair, small waist, thick ass. I’ve grown up hearing that and that’s all I ever wanted to look like .vut the reason I fell so short from that is my fault I can only blame myself for looking the way I do.they say your supposed to love your scars but what do you do when their everywhere and make you feel.lile your suffocating in your own imperfections .when I leave the room I can hear people talk about my face. Which makes it extra hard to where a bathing suit when you know there talking behind your back about how ugly you look. I know looks aren’t everything but when I look good it gives me the confidence to look people in the eye and have confidence in everything I do.but with a fave like this I feel like people.only see my scars and not me I feel silenced . I have silenced myself when I used to be so LOUD.i wanna find my inner voice again , I wanna find myself I lm lost . They say if you don’t like something you should change it . Maybe if I can achieve my body image I should change the way I look at myself. Since I don’t love myself that’s what I should change. But I don’t know where or how to start .