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Chapter 1 Introduction : Who is Naiyara?

Hi everyone! I’d like to introduce you to my Candy, Naiyara! She’s cuban american but was born in NYC. After High School, she spent a year at Anteros Academy, as an art major and then moved to Paris to study at the Ecole des Beaux-Arts. She is now, back at Anteros and studying to get a Masters in Modern Arts. After that, she’s thinking about studying makeup artistry at MUD but she’s still thinking.

She looks confident and some people say intimidating but she’s really a big Care Bear that cries as easily as a two year old. She can even cry for a commercial. Castiel teases her about that all the time. She teases him too, about a bunch of stuff, mostly how he goes full mode sugar daddy on his dog, Demon.

She’s got a great sense of humour and particularly enjoys dark humour, however she can burst out laughing for the most childish and ridiculous jokes too.

She’s a big movie and TV series fan. Horror, thriller and fantasy are her favorites, but she’ll turn her brain off for a good old action movie too. One thing Castiel NEVER understood is that if she starts a serie, no matter how bad it is, or how much she hates it, she has to finish it. She’s adores reading too but doesn’t find time to do so. She sucks at time management.

She likes to dance as well which she’s been practicing since she was a kid. Five years ago she also took on Kick Boxing because Paris is not as idyllic as it seems.

In Paris, she met an old friend from High School! @colombia-chan ‘s Evie!

Evie was in Paris studying Culinary and Pastry arts in a prestigious school and the two girls grew extremily close to the point of even sharing an appartment together!

Of course, that took a little time. Evie was like a little sister to Castiel and everytime Naiyara looked at her she thought of her ex-boyfriend. As she did everytime Rosalya or Alexy called.

She tried to keep Evie at bay, but she was spiralling and Evie noticed, having gone through something similar herself. She noticed how little Naiyara answered her friends from Sweet Amoris, even Nathaniel which she adored and saw how the young woman was slowly isolated herself. Evie insisted. She kept coming back, kept calling and didn’t take no for an answer.

In the end, Niayara gave up. Her walls came crushing down and she let her friend in.

With the help of Evie and a few years of therapy, she got herself together. She, however, never forgot Castiel and is determined to, if anything, at least win him back as a friend.

Now, a little background story :

In terms of flaws, her two biggest ones are the two deadly sins of relationships : she’s impulsive and has trust issues.

The reason for those trust issues are numerous. For starters, Naiyara was born out of adlutery. Her father cheated on his wife with Naiyara’s mother. This has always been one of Naiyara’s greatest shame. She often calls herself a “Bastard” and has the word tattoed across above her left breast.

She’ll say it “jokingly” and with a huge smile on her face but deep down it hurts.

Her father never acknoweledged her. She met him once when she was 5.

“She’s small.” Was all he said. He’d barely looked at the drawing she’d spent the entire previous day working on.

She’d called him several times after that. He’d answer. She’d tell him about her, about her dreams and aspirations, ask him questions. His answers were short. His tone, monotonous. She didn’t call too often though. He’d mentioned he was too busy for visits be it by her or from him, so, she didn’t want to bother him by calling too often. Just a few calls a year.

Until she was 12.

“Look kid, you’re very nice and all, and I get you want a relationship but I’ve got my own life and... Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t say anything before ‘cause you were too young to understand but now you’re older.... Look, I... I never wanted kids. I thought maybe now that you were here, it’d be cool but, the truth is, I’m just not interested. I’m sorry.”

And that was it. I’m not interested. I’m not interested IN YOU. YOU’RE NOT interesting. YOU ARE NOT LOVABLE.

The truth was out : Naiyara was unworthy of love. Her mother loved her because she didn’t have a choice. Naiyara stayed clear of friends. No point in being desappointed again. It’s not like she ever had any anyway and she was fine like that. She had her drawing, her writings, her worlds.

Her mother died two years after that. Her father didn’t take her in and she was put in foster care for two years until the State finally found her aunt Agatha who travelled a lot and hadn’t talked to her sister in over twenty years. She didn’t even know Naiyara’s mother had passed away.

That’s when she moved to Sweet Amoris at the age of 16. Hurt and somewhat traumatized by all that had happened, Agatha got Naiyara into therapy and little by little things started to change for the better. She now knew her mother had LOVED HER for no other reason than she was her daughter. For the first time in her life, she has friends. Obviously, never having had any, she was awkward but Rosalya, Alexy, Kim and Iris still loved her all the same. Even if she didn’t really understand the social rules that came with having friends. Towards the end of senior year, she even started dating a boy she adored : Castiel. However she still couldn’t believe that a man/boy could really loved her. She was pretty so, he probably just wanted her for sex. She should’ve broken up immediatly but she loved him and... At least he wanted her... For something, if anything. Maybe she could just make him wait, maybe that way, she’d get to spend as much time as possible with him.

A year passed and Castiel was still there. He wrote songs for her. He spent time with her, even after they’d slept together. Maybe...

But Castiel started gaining fame and that woke Naiyara’s demons.

Jealous people all around her fed the demons by telling her how Castiel would eventually cheat on her with a prettier, kinkier groupie. She didn’t want to believe it at first but the demon was stronger and he pushed her towards the worst decison of her life.

The day they broke up, Naiyara called Castiel. He was in concert in a nearby town. HE DIDN’T PICK UP. The concert must have been over for at least 15 minutes, why wasn’t he picking up?

“You know why.” Said the demon. Yes. She had to face the truth. She knew why.

When Castiel came home, she didn’t have the courage to tell him she knew, so she broke up and left.

Castiel never saw the tears blinding Naiyara’s vision as she walked back home.

Links to next chapters :

Chapter 2 Part 1 A Hell of a Concert : Five Years Later!

Chapter 2 Part 2 A Hell of a Concert : Confrontation!

I’ve edited this part. You might want to re-read it. Sorry, I’m writing as it comes so changes might come again. I’ll do my best to avoid them, as I know it can be annoying to re-read parts you’ve already read.

I’ll continue later, on a second post! Hope you liked it. Tell me what you think in the comment section! (don’t worry, this is will get a happy end and Naiyara IS fun to be with, she’s just a complicated bitch to date, haha)

RP- Prologue to Concert

@the-world-of-naiyara I apologize if I didn’t do much with Naiyara this part, I need a quick rundown of her again for the next part but I tried my best as this part was Evie focused, Next part though well... It’s Naiyara and Nath focused so... ;)

An RP between me and this beautiful woman. Though her’s will be focused on her and Castiel with my Evie with Nathaniel, it is the reverse here. And this is the prologue. Also, the information here is canon to Evie’s character, just stating that now.

Warning!!!- I ask that any and all readers that may suffer from anxiety or depression please be careful when reading this fic. As I who have suffered from this will admit that I cried for much of this fic’s writing. I apologize if this affects anyone the same.

Prologue to the Concert

If there was one thing Evie hated. It had to be herself sadly enough.

Teenage Evelynn was weak, she was immature, she was a pain, she was a child. She couldn’t handle being alone, she couldn’t love herself even though other did, she was too dependent on others, she wasn’t good enough. Those were all the things that would run through Evie’s mind and she hated it.

Adult Evelynn… she didn’t know about her. She’d hope she was mature, hoped she was strong, independent, no longer a silent crybaby, and loved herself as much as she knew she should. She hoped she could handle being alone and was no longer a child. Those were all the things she hoped she was now, and Evie hated how she couldn’t be sure it was true.

Ever since she’d return it had felt that both everything and nothing had changed. Many of her friends were no longer in this town she once saw as home and those that remain… were angry with her. How stupid, what utter bullshit. She couldn’t even scream it to the world. She was blamed for the loss of contact, she was blamed for leaving, but what had any of them done. Where were they when she’d tried messaging them, tried calling. Where were they when she left them Happy Birthdays or asked them to get well or congratulated them over their accomplishments even when they’d never told her about them. No never her, it was always others that tell her, or open post online.

She remembers Alexy trying, he’d tried for so long until Armin left. She remembers Rosa suddenly being gone, Lysanders and Leighs parent’s death was the start of her sudden extended periods of absence before she’s completely gone. She remembers who the very last one she loses contact with, and as she looks back down at her phone she wonders if he even got it. Her message, no, her messages plural.

Even though she’d ended things, because she was scared and alone. The darkness of her mind having overcome her, the loss of the support she relied on making her relapse into the anxious little girl she’d always strived to leave behind.

Her mind whispers, ‘Why didn’t you stop me? Why didn’t you ask me to stay? I would have stayed if you just asked, didn’t you know that.’

Even though she’d never asked him if she could stay, it was never out of lack of love. She loved her parents, did she want to leave them at such a young age, no, would she if he’d ask, yes. She couldn’t ask him though, she didn’t want to seem so dependent, she wanted to be her best for him, she usually could be for him.

‘Was I not good enough? Did you stop loving me the way I still love you?’ Her heart screams and cries. She remembers trying, she remembers doing her best to be strong for herself and him. Supporting him as he worked towards his dream, she believed in him, she knew he was good, she knew he could succeed. But the fear sets in, she feels isolated, she loses the support she depends on, and it’s just one missed called, just one stupid call and she can’t breathe.

She realizes he’s going places she can’t follow and it hurts. She wants to be there, she wants to see it, him, and she can’t. She wants to scream and cry, she wants to be weak with him and it scares her, what if hates her, what if he stops loving her? What if she’s not enough?

She remembers getting sick. She throws up in her bathroom and cries, it feels like a cycle is repeating. Her hair was finally growing back she’d been so proud, she thought she was better. That she was confident and could handle it. But as she looks in the mirror all she sees is the same little girl from her youth and hates it.

She ends things, he barely argues, she bets he hates her. She runs away thinking it will be better, that she needs to get better. She bets he thinks she doesn’t care, that she never cared. When the conversation ends, when they end, she remembers screaming and crying, her mother running in. Her father isn’t home, her mother sees her and knows. She bets he thinks she’s abandon him and he’s right. It hurts, and all she wants is to call him and apologize take everything back and tell him the truth. She’s too scared, she doesn’t love herself enough, he deserves better.

Her mother holds her as she breaks. Apologizing in the way only a parent can, she sees her daughters broken, damaged and she doesn’t know what to do.

Evie hates herself for making her mother cry. She knows her mother blames herself in some way, wonders what she could do to help Evie, what she could have done to prevent this. She try’s to talk Evie into therapy, she can’t. She can never trust those types of doctors after the first time they try.

She falls asleep crying and wakes up crying. She sick of herself and hates herself. Why is she like this? Wasn’t she suppose to be fine, parents who loved her, friends, healthy at least physically. She remembers when it was worse, being a crybaby as a child and bullied. She thought she was over it once middle school hit, once she’s entered high school, once she met him. She’s still feels sick though, and she’s disgusted with herself.

She’s tired of it, and it takes a week, no two. Of on and off crying, of going to school and trying to move on, of listening to her song, the one he made her, and staring at the memories of their shared past to finally make her stop. She goes to the corner store and buys a pack of cigarettes, the same brand he’d always smoke. She tries to smoke, hopes it will numb her, remembering how the nicotine helped him when he was stressed. It’s not for her, she hates the burning in her lungs and the taste of it without him, but the smell… it’s enough it becomes a comfort. Simply lighting one and letting its scent overpower her own, her parents notice. They’re angry, but she doesn’t budge. It’s one of the few things she will fight for, and they leave it be.

It takes another two weeks before she finally makes a decision, sending him a simple hello, and asking how he’s been. He doesn’t respond, but she knows he saw…

She promises herself then, three months after the break up to change. She’s made the promise before, she hates that she’s broken it so many times before. And yet, staring at the mirror that time yells and cries in anger instead of unsteady sorrow and unresolved hope. She’s done, she has to grow up, she has to be better not wants, needs.

It takes four years, she fakes it for the longest time. She has little support outside her parents, her aunt.

“Evie…” There a knock on her dorms room before it opens. Naiyara looks in cautiously with a glare and freezes when her eyes land on her. “Mija…” She worriedly whispers in Spanish. She quickly enters shutting the door behind her. Walking to her she hesitates for a bit before wrapping her arms around Evie’s still form. It’s silent, the tears that fall from dull violet eyes worries her, but as they close and reopen Naiyara feels pride swell within her. A fire of determination now within them as Evie turns to her in Naiyara’s arms.

“Hey…”

Evie suddenly smiles wickedly, “Think I can pull off the, just cried my eyes off, look?”

Chuckling Naiyara shakes her head, whipping the residual tears from her friend’s face as she worriedly smiles down at her. “Oh honey, no… You’re an ugly crier.” She jokes and Evie shrugs.

“Worth a shot.”

Chapter 2 A hell of a concert! Part 1 : Five years later!

Naiyara breathes out heavily after the fifth Zumba work out of the day. She needed to take the edge. In an hour is Castiel’s concert. She hasn’t talked to him in 5 years.

As she enters the bathroom to take a shower, Naiyara looks at herself in the mirror.

“Stupid bitch.” She says at the reflection.

Time has passed and even if she’ll never completily get rid of her demon, she’s learnt to live with him and she tamed it. He’s now like your parents’ pet you really don’t like but have to live with nonetheless.

If only she’d learnt to do that earlier... Maybe they’d still be together. Maybe they’d be happy.

She shakes those thoughts away. No point crying over spilled milk. She’ll see him tonight and... And what? Castiel isn’t exactly the forgiving type. She, sure, wouldn’t forgive herself in his shoes. As a matter of fact, she doesn’t. Not that Paris was all bad. She got to study art in one of the most prestegious school in the country, learn french. She made friends... She’s got a lifetime of memories but... She wished she could have shared them with him.

Well, if anything, he deserves an explanation so, if he’s willing to talk to her, Naiyara will try and make amends.

She grabs her favorite jeans. They’re light grey. There’s a big square-ish hole on each thigh and the knees are ripped. Now she has a couple of the sort. But those are special. She’s had them for ages and even washes them by hand as to not damage them. And that’s when she rememebers. Those were also Castiel’s favorite jeans. It was one of the only time, if not THE ONLY time he’d agreed to go shopping with her. She’d found them and immediatly like their style, but being self conscious about her thighs, wasn’t sure if they’d suit her. Castiel, who apparently liked her legs, for whatever be the reason, convinced her to try them on. From there on out, every time she’d wear them, he’d slide his fingers up the holes on the thighs and caress her skin, sometimes gently. Sometimes, not so gently.

“Maybe I shouldn’t wear these.” Nayiara thought to herself. But those were her favorites. In them, she felt beautiful and sexy. Especially now, after 5 years of work out. A girl’s gotta feel sexy and beautitul if she’s going to see her ex-from-5 years-ago-who-probably-hates-her guts. She, therefore, paired them with a tight, black crop top and the usual pair of black stilletos, she wore almost everyday.

Naiyara finishes her makeup with a nude matte lipstick. At that exact moment a knock on the door is heard, .

“My God, Nai, you’re gorgeous! Castiel is gonna be head over heels over you!”

“Unless he kills me before he’s had a chance to properly look at me.”

“Well, the good news is, if he does try and kill you, it means you’re still important to him!”

“Mmmh... Evie’s undying optimism.”

“Always look at the bright side and the bright side will look at you!”

“That’s funny coming from you.”

“Hey! I’m not pessimistic, I’m realistic. And when it comes to you two dumb-fucks... Well, let’s just say I need optimism because you two really are dumb!”

Niayara makes a face at her friend and Evie grabs her arm. The two friends leave.

The Snake Room, where the concert is held isn’t far. It’s the bar they went to after Naiyara and Evie’s arrival, for their very own kind-of-high-school reunion. Rosalya, Alexy, Priya and Kim were all there. Naiyara even invited Melody, for some reason. She wanted to invite Nathaniel but figured it was best if Evie had a chance to talk to him one-on-one first. They’d get the opportunity, surely. School was starting on Monday so hopefully, they see each other during this weekend. Maybe tonight at the concert? Nah... Nath and Castiel had never gotten along, he’d probably not come.

Evie was one to talk about her and Castiel being dumb-fucks. She and Nathaniel weren’t any better. At least Castiel talked to Evie! Nathaniel pushed even Nayiara away after he and Evie broke up. It was painful, he was her bestfriend after all. But Nayiara wasn’t the type to give up. She’d kept in contact with him, sending him Chrismas wishes and birthday messages over the years. He was the only one she’d kept in contact with. She couldn’t bare to lose the second man she loved most in the world. He was the one who’d suggested she took boxing classes to blow some steam off as well as learn how to defend herself. Hopefully, they could become real friends again and she’d finally understand what happened to him.

When she’d questionned Melody and the others for the bezillion time during the party, they’d refused to talk about him, as usual. Naiyara didn’t insist. Kim told her he often came to her gym and Naiyara decided she’d drop by some time. Later in the eveing, Chani joined them. She was the only one who was new to the team but they all agreed : she was a goog recruit!

“Damn, there’s so many people!” Naiyara looks at the huge line formed outside the Snake Room

“Well he’s kind of a big deal around here, you know.” Says Evie giving her friend a little elbow push. Naiyara didn’t need Evie to tell her Castiel was a big deal. SHE KNEW. She knew just how much of a big deal he was. To the town. To her. And she knew about Crowstorm too. She’d kept updated though internet and social media. And through Evie. She never dared to ask if he asked about her when they talked over the phone. Kinda stalking him, she admitts to herself shamefully. She’d even had bought their album, which she knew the lyrics to many of the songs, now.

Once they’d finally gotten in, Evie went to get some drinks. It might actually be a good evening, considering they managed to get a table even with the number of people who’d gotten in before them.

“Here you go! One mojito for the stressed out lady!”

Naiyara responded by rolling her eyes.

“It’s gonna be ok. Don’t worry.”

So many memories come rushing back. She was already in Paris when she realized how stupid she’d been and that, even if Castiel might not have loved her the way she loved him, he wasn’t a cheating jerk. He would’ve, at least had the decency to break up with her. And HE would’ve given a real explanation and not a lie. And a shitty one at that. She’d used her parents moving to justify the break up.

“Why didn’t you try and stop me Castiel?” The girl wonders in silent. Probably because she wasn’t that important to him.

The lights go out, grabing Naiyara out of her brewing. Cries, screams, “Castieeeel!”

A minute later, the voice that had been hunting her dreams for the past half decade is heard.

@colombia-chan ‘s Evie

Link to previous chapter :

Chapter 1 Introduction : Who is Naiyara?

Link to new chapter :

Chapter 2 A hell of a Concert Part 2 : Confrontation!

Ok, I wanted to keep going but it’s really late here in France and I’m tired so I’ll write more some other time!

To a Cool New Friend

@nameliachango

Happy birthday this is for you! Please enjoy I did my best, have the nicest birthday!!