#natureoflove

[soummusic]

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정수지(feat.이지영)의 신곡 'Nature of love' 내일 8시 판교 커먼키친에서 첫 공개됩니다! #숨soum뮤직 #힐링음악 #명상음악 #태교음악 #빅마마 #이지영 #정수지 #박지은 #명상 #요가 #힐링 #치유 #태교 #어쿠스틱 #힐링콘서트 #커먼키친 #이너라이트 #InnerLight #SoojiJung2집 #NatureOfLove(건대 인디스타 공연장에서)

[alice-in-wonderland-me]

Every part of you is beautiful ... 🍁 . . . . . . . #naturephotography #natureoflove #naturelover #natureisbeautiful #beautifulnaturephotography #beautifulnature #loveinnature #natureislife #lifeofnature #lifequotes #life #happinessinnature https://www.instagram.com/p/CM1kUukJanQ/?igshid=tkaf6zdy87ql

[alice-in-wonderland-me]

Walking down a random path , will I be able to find happiness ...? 🍀🛤️ . . . . . . . #naturelover #naturephotography #natureforhappylife #natureoflove #happinessinnature #happiness #lifequotes #lifeofnature #life #pathforhappiness #pathforhealing #lifepath https://www.instagram.com/p/CMyyn4QpGE4/?igshid=mr2hsow32vya

[eunikaaucsap-blog]

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[rafiandklee]

Created something beautiful, for someone beautiful! For a very special birthday! #art #natureoflove

[wittylunatic]

“I loved someone, it was tenuous until I fell in it” -Wittylunatic

[philosophical-smashbro-blog]

First Essay- Love

The Nature of Love

Of the many emotions that a human can express, love happens to be one that is riddled with the greatest amount of mystery. What is love? What does it mean to be in love? Today’s media has shown several examples of love and the way that humans respond to it. If someone were to ask me what love was, I wouldn’t be able to answer them in the way that I want. For me, to ask what love is happens to be a complex task and would be just as difficult as explaining how people can have faith in something they aren’t certain of. “Love is a chemical reaction that occurs in the brain”…my answer to the question of what love is would rely almost completely on the biological responses that seem to be associated with the emotion. I may not know exactly what love is beyond the chemical processes that may or may not trigger it, but I as well as every other human has seen love. Humans have known love for ages, probably since the first of us walked the Earth. With the countless examples of love I have seen in the media as well as in my everyday life I believe I can answer the question “what is the nature of love?” Some obvious answers to this question are ones like “Love is a special bond when two people like each other” or “Love is finding someone that matches you so well that it’s like they share the same soul”. These answers are vague, and not at all satisfying for one that pursues knowledge through philosophy. In regards to love my life has taught me that it is somewhat particular to the individual; this is why questions that ask about “What is love?” are hard to answer, because love is shaped by the desires of the lover. Love is not just one simple thing but it does seem to come about in a fairly consistent way. In Plato’s Symposium, the very subject of love is discussed. Many of the characters describe love as a god, being benevolent and beautiful; others saw it as more of a connection that existed between two people. The most intriguing explanation of love was introduced by a woman named Diotima in a story told by Socrates. She explained that love is not a god, but instead a medium that connects an individual with the form of beauty. This connection ultimately leads one to the greatest good. After reflecting on this speech I believe that Diotima’s explanation of love was the most accurate. Love’s identity is a mystery but it has been shown that it connects an individual to the things he/she desires. It is not a connection that leads to the greatest good, at least not directly, but does have the potential to bring out what is most good inside of humans. Not only does love connect us to inanimate objects but also to living objects, the most important being other humans. This is the nature of love, a medium that connects an individual’s desires to the object of their love. Love plays this role in each and every instance, from a man and woman getting married to a person pursuing a music career. Love acts as a medium; as a means to satisfy one’s desires, and more importantly, can help guide an individual to maximizing their fullest potential as a human. 

Before I go into what the nature of love is, I must first define what I mean when I use the term object and the two categories of an object which I use, living and non-living. My definition of a non-living object is essentially the same as Aristotle’s definition of an inanimate object in his great chain of being. This includes any tangible substance that does not possess life such as material possessions and food. I also extend non-living objects to also include intangible ideas such as music, art (or beauty), and math. A living object, as used by me, is strictly limited to human beings. Even though I believe that there are some animals which can experience love, for the sake of simplicity I am limiting living objects to humans because it is easiest to relate the experience of love using the most developed rational beings that I know exist. To begin, rational beings that are capable of thinking and contemplation are the only objects that can experience and feel the emotion of love. Love begins with an individual. When he/she interacts with the world around them, they begin to develop different attachments to both living and non-living objects. The individual discovers desirable characteristics within the object which perpetuate continued positive interactions with the object. When the feelings associated with those attachments persist and become stronger, the individual then experiences the emotion of love. This love can be referred to as linear love. The individual projects their feeling of love onto the object of their love. This creates a relationship of the lover and the beloved. The lover can, for the most part, come to love anything if the environment they are raised in allows for it. The lover can love both living and non-living objects alike; however, there are some differences in the experience of projecting linear love onto them. Non-living objects are not affected by the love projected onto them. An individual can have a love of music, but the music is not at all changed as a result of the individual’s love. If an individual comes to love another living object, another human, then the feelings of the lover can indeed have an effect on the beloved. As reality and media alike have shown, people can react positively or negatively to linear love. In some cases the beloved learns about the feelings of the lover and as a result the beloved’s feelings towards the lover are stimulated, potentially resulting in the reciprocation of linear love. It is also possible that the beloved becomes distressed upon learning of the lover’s feelings. If the lover is bold in his/her advances, the beloved my reject the lover openly and this can have effects on the lover’s feelings given enough time and the strength of the feeling. Whether or not the beloved reciprocates the feeling of love depends primarily on if they find desirable characteristics within the lover, but is also dependent on the social factors such as if either of them already have significant others or the economic status of the lover. The factors which determine if an individual will love a non-living object are also dependent on social factors and the number of positive experiences one has with the object. If one is exposed to math for much of their life and has always been successful when practicing it, it is possible that the individual will develop a love for math; however, if this individual is exposed to math but not successful in it they may ultimately express hatred or disinterest in math. Linear love functions like this most of the time, but this is not the entire experience of love for a living object. 

In the many cases where the beloved reciprocates the feelings of the lover, and projects their own linear love onto the lover, this creates a bond that it is stronger and rarer than linear love. The love that results when two individuals share mutual desires and feelings of linear love is called composite love. Composite love can be roughly defined as the love that exists between two living beings. Of the two loves, it is more complex in the relationships that are formed because the individual desires of both lovers are what shape the outcome of composite love. There are different types of relationships that people can establish where composite love is expressed. The most obvious expression of this love is by two intimate lovers. Even though different people express these feelings differently, it is common for two lovers to share exclusive physical desires for one another as well as the desire to create a family depending on how serious the relationship becomes. Another relationship (which in my opinion is overlooked too often) where composite love is expressed is the bond between two friends. Friendship bonds are created when two individuals find similar activities to be enjoyable and after repeated encounters the two begin to express feelings of linear love, which eventually creates the bond of composite love. The third relationship where composite love is present is the bond between family members. Family bonds are different in that we cannot choose who our family consists of and so the composite love between family members tends to be similar to bonds of friendship, or in less socially acceptable circumstances bonds between lovers. Linear and composite love is similar and obviously related, but composite love differs from linear love for various reasons. First, when two people share mutual desires when expressing composite love, this establishes solidarity and strengthens their feelings to a degree that exceeds linear love completely. Second, when composite love is shared by two individuals a set of special obligations are formed between the two. This happens with family, friends, and lovers alike. Third, an individual experiencing linear love typically seems focused on satisfying their own desires, but when an individual experiences composite love they are concerned if not equally than more so with satisfying the beloved’s desires as well. It goes to say that with both linear love and composite love, an individual is not limited to making only a single connection. A human being has the capacity to create as many linear and composite love bonds as he/she has the opportunity to do so. Humans do not simply love one person for all their lives. We can have several friends with whom we share composite love with, and most humans have multiple family members that they share love with. Even with intimate relationships that entertain only two people at a time, if that bond falls apart the individuals can come to love other people or even love each other again. Humans also can have love for several non-living objects. We can love music, movies, books, food, and hundreds of other objects simultaneously. All of these different connections, as mentioned above, are partially dependent on the positive interactions we have with the objects. What happens, though, if after a love has developed a series of negative experiences persist? Just as love is not singular, it is also not eternal. This applies to both linear and composite love; however, tends to be less common with linear love when the beloved is a non-living object. This is because humans do not have an all-or-nothing position with non-living objects. For example, an individual with a love of books does not love every book in existence. There are some that they like more than others and some which they dislike all together, but ultimately they still have a linear love of books. Composite love is more susceptible to negative experiences. It is a common occurrence for human desire to change, and when this happens between two individuals that share a composite love bond the resulting change may cause tension if the desires conflict with one another. If these complications are serious enough or persist for too long, the relationship may come to an end. 

After discussing the particular ways in which love is experienced the next step is to discuss some of the other aspects that are accompanied by the experience of love. Even from young ages people contain ideations about love and about falling in love. Social influences are part of the reason but it goes without saying that one does not need to be told to seek out love in the form of friendship or intimate relationships. Why is it that we seek out connections to other humans so fervently? What do we gain from the experience of linear and composite love? Two philosophers have presented works which I have read to help me answer these questions. The first is Aristotle who writes about the nature of friendship and love in the Nicomachean Ethics. He speaks about the three ways in which friendships are formed, and states that when formed for the sake of utility or pleasure they tend to be short-lived. There is a stronger friendship which is simply for the sake of itself which is the strongest friendship. It is this friendship which is applicable to what I have called composite love. Two people that share a bond of composite love care about the well-being of each other, and it is only when their desires begin to conflict that their relationship is in danger; however, when this happens they are willing to make changes to their own desires for the sake of the relationship. If the relationship is merely a superficial bond of composite love or, as Aristotle describes, established for the sake of pleasure or utility the relationship will cease. Aristotle’s ultimate objective in writing the Nicomachean Ethics was to show the ways in which humans can achieve their full potential as humans. He states that friendship is one of the essential things that humans need to do this. In the context of love this also holds true because it is through love that people maximize their humanness. When we are connected to other humans through composite love, and sometimes even linear love, we perform at our peaks. We tend to be most ethical towards the ones we love, we are inspired to work harder and perform better in front of the ones we love, and we show our true selves in front of our friends, families, and lovers. Using Diane Jeske’s work Families, Friends, and Special Obligations we can come to understand even more as to why humans seek love and also the ways in which these relationships are beneficial. In her work she discusses the nature of special obligations that are formed in bonds of friendship and family. Essentially when these bonds are formed there are implicit and explicit agreements that are created. The obligations that form are a factor of both the desires in the individuals and the social constructions of what the relationships mean. In friendship there is the obligation that one will not do anything to harm the other in any way, and this is pretty much a universal belief. The relationships between intimate lovers are more versatile depending on the culture. Typically in American society one has a single lover and is expected to not have sex with another person, while in another society in Asia spouses can have sex with other people but it is seen as a breach of obligation if one eats with the opposite sex in public. The obligations that are established in a certain relationship depends greatly where one is from. By looking at both Aristotle’s and Jeske’s works, the benefits to having these special obligations becomes apparent. Bonds of composite love, such as friendship, bring out the maximum potential in humans; however, this is not only for individuals but for the community as a whole. For centuries and longer humans have engaged in a society that is dependent on people providing different services and goods for the community. By establishing bonds of composite love with different people in the community one then gains the means to a better and easier life through the special obligations that are created. We can ask for favors when in a crisis and have access to those that are similar to us. This allows us to experience both the physical pleasures and the intangible joys that can only be experienced with the help of other people. 

Love is recognized as such an important emotion that there is an entire genre of movies dedicated to the experience of love. Romance films have been around for decades, and the multitude of films based on love has not reduced their production in the current generation of movies. Many films today tend to over-romanticize scenarios of love compared to the way love typically occurs in the average human life. Even though the movies are not great at showing accurate portrayals, they are still able to capture the nature of love that I have discussed above. The 2011 film Friends with Benefits does a fairly good job at showing many of the different aspects of love that I have presented. The movie is basically about two individuals that meet by chance and form a friendship. Having recently experienced bad break-ups with their former intimate partners, they eventually decide to have casual sex without the special obligations of being in an intimate relationship. The initial forming of their friendship shows the initial stages of their development of linear love. They find desirable qualities within each other and engage in several positive experiences to the point where they develop a mutual linear love, and then form a strong friendship as a result of the composite love they feel. The way in which their relationship is shaped by desires is also shown by the different activities they do together. The next part of the film focuses on how their friendship becomes threatened because their desires are changing. At a certain point they realize that they have different expectations and their relationship begins to fall apart. This part of the movie shows how conflicting desires can put serious strain on the relationship. Special obligations between family members are also shown at this point in the movie when the male individual shows that he is not ashamed of his father’s behavior as a result of his Alzheimer’s. The conclusion of this movie happens when the male character realizes he wants the same relationship as the female character, and with their desires once again aligned their connection of composite love is restored and strengthened. If one has seen this movie then they will most likely agree that it is not at all common for someone to win back the heart of their lover by organizing a flash mob in the middle of Times Square as if it’s the easiest thing to do; however, even with the over-the-top events we can see through film the nature of love and how the human experience of it is complex.

I have discussed how an individual first experiences the feeling of love. They begin by acknowledging desirable qualities within an object and after continued positive experiences the linear love for that object comes about. If the object is non-living the relationship between the lover and the beloved will most likely remain constant because non-living objects cannot change in the way that living objects can. If the object is living, i.e. human, then the linear love projected by the lover can be reciprocated or rejected. In the case of reciprocation where the beloved also projects linear love onto the lover then a new, stronger bond called composite love is formed. Composite love is not only stronger through solidarity, but also creates special obligations between the two individuals. The kinds of obligations that are created depend on the nature of the relationship that composite love operates in. The relationships that composite love can exist within are friendship, family, and the bond between intimate lovers. It is important to note that some of the obligations that are created are socially constructed and can vary from culture to culture. American society can have different expectations when it comes to intimate and family relationships than an East Asian culture. Humans are not limited to just one feeling of linear or composite love. We can make as many connections as our environment allows for, whether we have several ones simultaneously or experience them sequentially. Using Aristotle’s Nicomachean Ethics the reason as to why humans seek love as if driven by instinct was examined. Humans desire companionship because we operate in a society that depends on the structure of the community, each person specializing in a role that they are suited to do. By forming bonds of linear and composite love we are not only able to enjoy earthly/physical pleasures but we are able to create special obligations which will help make our lives easier. Diane Jeske speaks specifically on the nature of special obligations, showing that all three relationships that composite love exists within have special obligations that are valid because they are voluntarily accepted. Part of the reason why composite love is such a strong bond is because humans enter this bond freely, we enter friendships and intimate relationships of our own volition (and since family tends to be similar to that of friendships, or sometimes lovers, the composite love bond is entered voluntarily as well). Media does its best to capture the experience of love especially in film. The movie Friends with Benefits shows the changing relationship between two individuals. In different scenes of the film we see aspects of linear love, composite love, and examples of how these bonds can end and how desires can shape the nature of the relationship. Media tends to exaggerate the scenarios in which love plays out, but there is no denying that it is a powerful and complex emotion. The bonds that we form through love, bonds of friendship and family, make us better people when the relationships are full of positive events. The experience of love is essential to bringing out the full potential of humanness that we strive to achieve. 

(DISCLAIMER: THIS IS AN OLDER WORK OF MINE AND I DO PLAN TO WRITE A SECOND ESSAY EXPANDING ON THE CONCEPTS I SPEAK OF HERE)

FEEL FREE TO LEAVE ANY CRITIQUES YOU HAVE   Works Cited Fumerton, R., and D. Jeske. Introducing philosophy through film: Key texts, discussion, and film selections. West Sussex: Blackwell Publishing, 2010. Print.

Gluck, Will, dir. Friends with Benefits. Screen Gems, 2011. Film. 20 Apr 2013.

"Nicomachean Ethics." The Internet Classics Archive. N.p., 14 Mar 2011. Web. 29 Apr 2013. <http://classics.mit.edu/Aristotle/nicomachaen.8.viii.html>.

"Symposium." The Internet Classics Archive. N.p., 14 Mar 2011. Web. 29 Apr 2013. <http://classics.mit.edu/Plato/symposium.html>.