in which oc is a lonely bookworm for all my Rory Gilmore girlies, and two nerds really see each other for the very first time <3
or, the eddie x chrissy scene, except the popular cheerleader is replaced by all my nerdy, antisocial, bookworm girlies
Sitting in the woods alone, as usual, I was really trying to submerge in my regular Vonnegut. If you ever asked me about my surroundings on a daily basis I don’t think I could tell you. If you asked me to recite Vonnegut’s bibliography, that, I could easily do.
I’ve lived in Hawkins for as long as I can remember. My accustomed alienation and escapism into literature has been somewhat of an unfortunate and accidental plot for my eventual moving away - escaping to university. And it hasn’t been very hard: popularity isn’t in my genes, it seems. I’ve never been gifted with general athleticism, I couldn’t tell you the current musical or pop trends. Sometimes - most of the time - my own resemblance of the tryhard social outcast freaks scares me. I’m not like that. I’m just not great with people and I get tired trying.
A rustle of the dried orange leaves of the forest floor scares me out of my thoughts. I look up, dropping the book closed onto the wooden table.
It’s just Eddie. Oh. It’s Eddie. Oh.
“Hi,” he waves awkwardly, arms immediately going to embrace himself. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”
“It’s okay,” I try not to hiccup too obviously.
Eddie Munson. He’s not most people. Actually, he’s maybe the one person I really, really want near me. I’ve never talked to him before, only admired from far, and very silently. No one seems to like him. Me, I could drool. Not like that. There’s just something about him. Why is he here?
“You come here often?” he stands for a bit, leaning against a tree. And then he sits, right opposite me. He sits. Eddie Munson is sitting with me.
I try to catch my breath. “Sometimes. Most of the time. It’s nice here. I like fall the best.” I fumble with my book, trying to find the right page.
He starts looking around. This is horrible.
“So why are you here?”
“I’ll get out of your hair in a minute, I swear. I was just looking for someone,” he leans his chin on his hand. He’s leaning towards me. I could cry.
“N-no, it’s okay. Really. You can stay.” I smile weakly.
“Oh. Well thank you. Do you mind if I-” he points a pack of cigarettes my way.
“Not at all,” I blush.
“Want one?” he says with one between his teeth. I take one from the open box.
“Thanks.”
I try my best to look down but I can’t help but look up at his widened, brown eyes. “What?” I laugh as he lights it for me.
“You smoke!” This seems to bring him some childlike surprise.
“I do,” I nod, smiling while blowing out smoke. “Don’t be so surprised, please.”
“I just never would’ve thought.”
“Why? You don’t even know me.” I say this harsher than I mean and I immediately put my forehead against my hand. “Sorry.”
With his hands up, he says, “No, no. You’re right. I guess I just pictured you, every night, on the phone with your girlfriends, book in one hand. Maybe sitting in your window, or something. Twirling the phone cord.”
I burst out laughing. “That’s hysterical! Really, Eddie!” I can tell he’s getting a great deal of pride in making me laugh. Or me having said his name. His grin is infectious. “Really. You think that?” It dawned on me that he must think about me. “Or are you just fooling around?”
“No, no, I do think that. I thought that. I was wrong. Hawkins’ most well-read, top of the class student. Oh, she smokes! She’s like a chimney!” At this he gets up and twirls around and I laugh while I put out the cigarette. “What about me? What do you think?”
I blush at this. I couldn’t possibly tell him. Eddie, oh, I think far too much.
It gets awkwardly quiet and he sits back down. “Come on, you can be honest. I’m sure you’ve heard it all about me. What do you think? Any true?”
I look in his eyes for the first time. “I wouldn’t know. I haven’t heard much, I don’t tend to be involved in group circles or gossip. But I’ve seen you around a lot,” I think, Christ, bite your tongue now, “And if anything, I think... well, I think you’re really... well, you’re cool.”
He grins wide. “Is that so?”
“It is so,” I smile. “I wish I was more like you.”
He gets serious at this for a moment. His face gets almost frozen, with his eyes so wide. “Why is that?”
I shrug. “I think I’ve had to be so quiet. I’ve felt mostly invisible or teased. ‘The prude, the nerd. She’s no fun. She’s so stuck up, look how she sucks up to the teacher!’” I scoff.
“Well what about the nerd group? There’s so many of them, I would’ve thought they’d have recruited you. You should be their leader by now.”
I laugh a little. “I guess. I’ve just never been interested. Group situations freak me out a little. I’m not a good conversationalist.”
“I think you’re doing great now,” he smiles.
“Thanks.” I smile back.
“So is that how you felt, all these years?” he looks deeply into me. “No one would’ve guessed. You look so sure of yourself. Don’t think I don’t see you, walking all around this school, it’s like you own the damn place. And always the book. It’s a new one every week?”
I really don’t think this is real. “Be serious!”
“Oh, but I am! Really.”
It all grows to a comfortable silence. I haven’t had many of those.
“I see you, too,” I say, almost a whisper.
He leans even closer. “Really?!”
I nod, smiling. “It’d be difficult not to, you’re always causing a havoc!” I tease. “Heavy boots, too.” I look down.
He stomps them a little, excitedly. “Metal, aren’t they.”
“Yeah. Spikey.” He laughs at this and I blush.
“So what did I interrupt?” he pokes at the book, lying upside down between us.
“Oh, it’s nothing important,” I say, embarrassed.
“Really? You’ve been really into it these past few days.” I almost swallow my tongue; I started the book this Monday. It’s Thursday now. “I really do see, y’know.”
“It’s an anti-war book. The protagonist, well, he time-travels, he can’t stop. There’s aliens too. And it’s just a big metaphor for the impacts of militarism.”
“If you like those kind of stuff you should join Hellfire,” he opens his jacket to reveal the signature shirt. “It’s kind of politics. Of the underworld,” he leans in, wiggling his fingers like he’d just said something scary.
“Well, sure.”
He freezes, “Really?”
I nod. “Sure. I already told you I’m not great in groups, and I don’t know how to play. But I think I’d like to try.”
“You’d like to try?” he smiles. “We can definitely work with that. We’re actually one member short tonight.”
“Tonight?” I think, but not for long. “I can come.”
He smacks the table and gets up to twirl some more. “She can come! You don’t even know how much of a life saver you are!”
I think my face must be boiling hot by now, and my heart could really jump out of my chest. Hellfire and me. Eddie Munson’s club and me. Christ, things can really be crazy in Hawkins.
